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Thread: Secular Confessions

  1. #21571

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    I'm sorry, Chrissy. Is he worried about all the changes or the prevailing mood of the house? There is probably a lot of anxiety floating around. I hope he wears himself out soon.

    "Any idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out." -Anton Chekhov


  2. #21572
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    Probably you're right, but I'm at the end of what I can cope with myself. I'm ready to go to bed just to hide.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  3. #21573
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    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    I let my kids read anything they want. Some of it is graphic but *shrug* I really don't think it makes anyone have sex that doesn't want to anyway.
    I'd be okay with it for a high school kid. But at 11-12?

    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    Yes!!! Do tell!
    Just an ongoing family feud thing. My dad really, really doesn't like my mom's brother and his wife and they reciprocate (honestly, I can't blame them). I understand some of where my dad was coming from, but he's carried it to a level where it's just honestly embarrassing. I just want to crawl under a rock and apologize for my family.

    Recently I friended this particular aunt and her daughter on facebook and my aunt said she looked forward to seeing me for my other aunt's birthday (first time I heard anything about this party). I mentioned that to my mom and she got upset because her sister had invited their mutual brother and SIL to my mom & aunt's joint birthday party without asking her permission. I pointed out to her that they were family members and it was a joint party, and if she had invited any other family member she wouldn't have needed to ask. My mother looked embarrassed and did agree with me.

    Then, when I got the invitation, it said specifically that each of the hosts (my dad and my aunt's husband) would be inviting their own guest list separately so don't be surprised if we get the same invitation twice. And yet my parents were still upset that my uncle and aunt were invited.

    Oh, the uncle and aunt in question are the parents of my cousin who died at 24. My father said to me (obviously, his own daughter) six months later that they "should have gotten over it by now." Seriously. That is just so sick I don't know where to begin.

    So honestly, my issue is really not with the people themselves but how my father acts like a spoiled toddler having a tantrum every time he has to interact with them, and how he convinces my mother he's right.

    I might come back and delete this ... I just hate to think of them reading this ever.
    Last edited by Gwenn; 07-12-2011 at 07:00 PM.
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  4. #21574
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gwenn View Post
    I'd be okay with it for a high school kid. But at 11-12?
    Absolutely. Why not? I wrote a book report on Elvis, What Happened in 5th grade. The teacher was mildly surprised. That wasn't the 'worst' book I'd read at that time, but the only one I dared tell my teacher I'd read. I just do not believe in censoring reading at all.

    As for the rest of it, I didn't quote because you said you might delete it. I can only say because...what else is there to say? I'm always amazed at the ability of adults to sometimes act as bad as mean girls in middle school. It's sad really. Life is too short to harbor that much negativity.

    I cannot stand my father's wife for many reasons but I'm certainly capable of treating her nice, asking how she's doing, and even mildly enjoying some conversation with her when we're forced together. My dad is worth it. Usually. I still haven't talked to him about missing Bobbie's graduation.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  5. #21575
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    Chrissy, I don't believe in censoring, either, but there is a fine line between where something is just not age appropriate. You wouldn't let a preschooler read something like that. Granted, a preschooler can't read on that level, but you wouldn't show a preschooler a porn video either. So somewhere there's a point where it's just too young. I'm sure that age is different for each of us, though ... and I'm glad it's up to us to set that age for our kids and we don't have someone else telling us when we can and can't (which, with videos, we do).
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  6. #21576
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    Well, by censoring I mean choosing what my kids read. I never thought about it before, but I was about 8 or 9 when I started reading my mother's adult books. Some were nonfiction true stories, others were smutty romances. If they got too graphic for me, sometimes I didn't understand and I'd skip pages...other times I'd opt to not finish the book. But definitely by 11 or 12 I was reading everything I could get my hands on.

    I'm aware of what my kids read and have never felt the least concern about it. Bobbie was like me and read way beyond her years. Jessica only skims books for book reports. Sydney has just begun reading for pleasure this year.

    I'm not much for limiting their television viewing either. I mean, I don't have porn or anything but their directv isn't blocked in their bedrooms. We don't have Cinemax or any of those stations, but there's probably plenty of stuff that other parents wouldn't let their kids watch. I just don't believe it's a big deal.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  7. #21577
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    I definitely won't shy away from educating my kids about sex and other adult topics, and once they're old enough to understand it I'll let them read and watch what they like.
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  8. #21578
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    My experience was that if they're not old enough to understand it, they won't read it. That's how I was, that's how Bobbie was...and well my other two have no interest in that stuff at all. We have discussions, obviously, but they're not readers so it's really a non-issue with them.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  9. #21579

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    Oh no! I'm sorry the place isn't open, Mandy. As for the desserts they seem like a pretty high end place, maybe they change desserts frequently or maybe they don't make many (if they make their own) so they don't like to advertise what they usually have if they tend to run out fast. Dunno, just my guesses from working in restaurants.

    Me, I'll try anything even if I don't know what it is. I was handed so many odd things at my last job that I don't think they expected me to try but I did. I liked most of it, too, except some really stinky cheese from Spain I didn't care for.

    Sorry Connor's being difficult Chrissy

  10. #21580
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    Thanks Kate. He's finally calmed down but Rich & I are certainly worse for wear. We're both snippy. He just started talking to me about some movie actors going to Afghanistan and I"m like, "who?" and he started saying something else that I didn't quite catch and I was totally lost...it irritated him that I couldn't follow what he was saying but frankly, while I do care I just don't right now.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  11. #21581

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    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    I liked most of it, too, except some really stinky cheese from Spain I didn't care for.
    I bet it was Cabrales. Mmmmm... Cabrales. One of my all-time favorites. Was it wrapped in brown chestnut leaves? Did it smell like old socks on the bottom of a dirty dumpster in July?

    "Any idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out." -Anton Chekhov


  12. #21582

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    I never thought I'd be a prude but I guess I totally am!
    I am very honest with my kids and will answer any questions but I very much limit tv. I just feel I'd prefer they were emotionally mature enough to handle the content of what they're watching/reading.

    So I cringe at half the rated G movies they watch but let them watch their brother being born.
    Last edited by Bridget; 07-12-2011 at 09:14 PM.

  13. #21583
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    I don't doubt for one second that my kids ever read anything they weren't 'emotionally' ready to handle.

    I'm sorry. I'm crabby & taking everything personally. It's not your fault I'm just going to go to bed.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  14. #21584

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    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    I don't doubt for one second that my kids ever read anything they weren't 'emotionally' ready to handle.

    I'm sorry. I'm crabby & taking everything personally. It's not your fault I'm just going to go to bed.
    I'm sorry you are having a hard day. I hope tomorrow is easier on you all.

    "Any idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out." -Anton Chekhov


  15. #21585

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    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    Thanks Kate. He's finally calmed down but Rich & I are certainly worse for wear. We're both snippy. He just started talking to me about some movie actors going to Afghanistan and I"m like, "who?" and he started saying something else that I didn't quite catch and I was totally lost...it irritated him that I couldn't follow what he was saying but frankly, while I do care I just don't right now.
    Oh, and this happened to us last night - he couldn't follow what I was saying and I was getting annoyed beyond reason that I was having to keep explaining! ARGH!

    Tomorrow is another day, according to Scarlett. Sleep well.

    "Any idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out." -Anton Chekhov


  16. #21586
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    Bridget, I feel very similarly to how you feel about it.

    Chrissy, I'm sorry you're having such a rough night.
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  17. #21587

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    I'm sorry, Chrissy. I wasn't trying to insinuate that there was a right or wrong. I hope tomorrow is a better day. Sure wish i could carry some of your load.

  18. #21588

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    Quote Originally Posted by katycat24 View Post
    I bet it was Cabrales. Mmmmm... Cabrales. One of my all-time favorites. Was it wrapped in brown chestnut leaves? Did it smell like old socks on the bottom of a dirty dumpster in July?
    LOL, I don't remember if it was wrapped in leaves but yeah, it stunk, but I still popped the whole piece in my mouth and ate it, just to show them (the bunch of guys they probably though I was going to throw up or something, lol) I always say I never met a cheese I didn't like, but this tested that.

    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    Thanks Kate. He's finally calmed down but Rich & I are certainly worse for wear. We're both snippy. He just started talking to me about some movie actors going to Afghanistan and I"m like, "who?" and he started saying something else that I didn't quite catch and I was totally lost...it irritated him that I couldn't follow what he was saying but frankly, while I do care I just don't right now.

    DH does that to me all the time! He says something I don't catch and when I say "what?" he says something different and it throws me off. I'm like "no, repeat what you just said" and he says "I don't remember what it was now" Augh!

  19. #21589

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    Did anyone here read the Flowers in the Attic books? Man, were they messed up. I was also reading Stephen King in my early teens...loved those, but when I decided to watch The Shining movie, that was a bad idea. I was terrified of long hallways for years (still kind of am ;))

  20. #21590
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    I LOVE Stephen King! Can't get enough of him! All time favorite book of his was (is) Bag of Bones! I wish I had more time to read for leisure, ah maybe one day...

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  21. #21591
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    My sister read the Flowers in the Attic books as a teenager. I read them just a couple of years ago. They were seriously messed up. Like, to the point where they were almost funny even though they weren't supposed to be.

    Never been a fan of the Steven King stuff. I got creeped out by stuff like the Twilight Zone when I was little and my friends were really into it so I avoided most of that when I had a choice.
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  22. #21592

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    I used to LOVE Virginia Andrews (even though she died and most of the books by her are not hers but some ghost writer, even though she did write Flowers in the Attic). I read a whole slew of her books when I was 9. I was just soooo intrigued by them. My favorite was about a girl named Heaven who was a hill billy and went to live with some crazy lady who made her take a bath in bleach. They were just all so outlandish and weird to me, plus they made me feel like all the crap I saw and went through was nothing compared to the craziness in the books. At least I knew all my half brothers and wouldn't have 4 kids by them LOL.

    I read a bunch of Stephen King books too. I became engrossed with him and read pretty much all his books through the mid 90s when they started to get bad IMO. He is way too wordy and descriptive currently and doesn't get to the point. He seems like he is trying too hard. That movie Super 8 is out now and I could not get past the first chapter of the book because of how wordy it was. But I loved Fire Starter, anything with kids in it was a hit to me when I was a kid. IT was also a favorite of mine. I basically became a part of the Dark Tower series, like I just thought about the characters and the books for weeks and months while and after I read them. But I was nerdy like that and didn't have a life much IMO, books were more interesting than band practice and playing baseball and arguing with my brother.

    Erin
    Last edited by Ky'sMom; 07-12-2011 at 09:50 PM.

  23. #21593
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    LOL - I was the same about books. Sometimes I was more interested in the people in the books than the stuff going on in my life.

    Didn't know most of those books were ghost written. That explains why the last books in that series had such a different "sound" to them. I should have picked up on that.
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  24. #21594

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    Yeah you can really tell the difference in the books that aren't written by her. They also all have the same plot basically, the girl marries some guy who is related to her in some way or another and they have a lot of the same issues, coming into money when they were once regular class or poor and broke and problems with parents/grandparents.

    You would probably like the Dark Tower series though Gwenn. They aren't the horror genre like the rest of Stephen King's books IMO. They are a fantasy series.

    Erin

  25. #21595
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    You're right, I probably would like them. I'll have to give them a try one of these days.
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  26. #21596
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    I saw the Flowers in the Attic movie and that movie about the Bear Clan (it had Darryl Hannah in it, didn't it?) Those were both some crazy stories! I'm not sure how I feel about censoring. I think that I saw too much stuff on TV when I was little, so I probably will keep a close eye on any TV my boys watch.

  27. #21597

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    I never read Flowers in the Attic, but I went to high school with the girl who modeled for the front cover (which strangely was reused on the VHS case too, even though she didn't act in the movie). If you read the book in the late 80s or 90s, you saw Tara. She owns a courier company now. LOL.
    Last edited by demigraf; 07-13-2011 at 12:58 AM.

  28. #21598

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    I found an image on Google. She was the tall girl on the cover, even during the 80s. Which makes me older than the hills.


  29. #21599
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    Oh, that's cool, Myles! Seeing that image makes me want to see that movie again, but I don't think I can because one of the kids dies in that movie and I don't do well with kids dying in movies since I have my own kids now.

  30. #21600

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    Yes! I remember that cover! LOL


    I agree with what Erin said about King--I read the ones that were already out in the early-mid 90's and didn't read much after that until the short story collection Full Dark, No Stars which I think is pretty recent and it is awesome. Creepy, disturbing stories.

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