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Thread: Secular Confessions

  1. #20881
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    I made my Rich breakfast in bed and let him sleep as late as he wanted. We just went out for dinner because dad's eat free at a lot of the restaurants here on Father's Day, so we had tex-mex. Now, I plan on giving him a back massage later on and that should be sufficient considering all I got for Mother's Day was a box of chocolates!

  2. #20882
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    3andMe is offline Every day is a gift. It's just... does it have to be a pair of socks? Hopelessly Devoted
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    Bridget, I spent about half an hour crafting a very thoughtful and detailed response to your question about headaches this morning, and when I hit reply I lost my internet connection, and my whole reply. I was so unhappy.

    Anyway, I have been out all morning, and I'm going to try to do some speed-cleaning while Soren's napping, but I'll try to send you a PM later.


  3. #20883

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    We went up to my dad's this morning for his annual father's day thing. My stepmom's family all comes and we have pancakes and bacon and the dads get their presents.

    One of my stepmom's nephews asked if I was pregnant, so that pretty much ruined it. It was right when we got there, too.

    Before he left he told my husband he has made that mistake a few times now. Um, after being wrong the first time, it must take amazing balls to ask another woman the same question.

  4. #20884
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    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    We went up to my dad's this morning for his annual father's day thing. My stepmom's family all comes and we have pancakes and bacon and the dads get their presents.

    One of my stepmom's nephews asked if I was pregnant, so that pretty much ruined it. It was right when we got there, too.

    Before he left he told my husband he has made that mistake a few times now. Um, after being wrong the first time, it must take amazing balls to ask another woman the same question.
    Ugh, someone once asked me that, too, and omg, how awful does it make you feel! Stupid people.

  5. #20885
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    Um, wow. I'm amazed someone hasn't slapped him yet. One day he just might get it.

    Breakfast in bed Ash? You're so sweet. My Rich won't ever sleep in. I don't think I've ever gotten up before him. What a nice thought though-I know I love it when Rich does it for me. For over a year he made me breakfast in bed every Sunday. I'm not sure why he stopped

    Rich dozed in the recliner all afternoon. I was on the couch.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  6. #20886

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    I took the kids to a benefit for my really good girlfriend's mom who has lyme disease that went undetected by her dr's who told her she was a hypochondriac (sp?) for years and years. I couldn't believe it when I saw her. She's a very small woman, but a farmer so always been solid muscle and today she looked so frail. She can hardly get out of bed most mornings. My dad and brother came too since we've all known the family our whole lives.
    It was an amazing turn out though. They are organic farmers and ran the madison farmer's market for years so it's a large community of people that know and care about them. I hope they can raise the money they need. She's receiving care from a dr out of her network so the insurance she has will not cover it.
    Dbf didn't come with us. He tried to lay a little guilt on me for not doing something special for/with him for father's day but I felt it was really important for me to attend the benefit. And he was invited to come with of course but said he'd go in a way that made it obvious he didn't want to go. I asked him please to stay home. He will ruin a day if it's something he doesn't want to do.
    We had a lot of fun. The kids were loving it as it was at the farm and so much to do. And I got to spend the day with my dad on father's day.

    I have no headache today but the pain is in my back. I know it is all related.

  7. #20887

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    I'm glad you got to spend the day with your dad Bridget. Phooey to dbf
    Yeah, I have been asked maybe 5 times over the last couple years if I'm pregnant. I thought losing 20 lbs. helped, but I guess not. Also because of the curvature in my spine due to spina bifida related issues, it makes my belly seem a little more prominent that average. I was wearing a sort of loose, long dress that's sort of cinched in below the chest. I thought the style suited me, but I guess not. I really don't know where to go from here. That makes 2 brand new dresses that I can't wear, that I thought I looked good in.

  8. #20888

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    Kate, what was the other dress? Honestly, those empire waist dresses are super cute but I think they even make really skinny girls look like they are wearing maternity clothes. Even so, they are cute and the guy that said that to you is an idiot. If he's done it so many times he strikes me as the kind of person who does that kind of stuff on purpose and feigns innocence because the whole scenario gets him attention.

    Do you guys ever run into those parents where it seems like everything they say to their child is for the benefit of everyone around them? Like, they talk really loud and look around to see who is listening and usually who is listening least of all is the child?
    I ask because my brother and I were in line for food at the benefit today and a woman was in line with her 2ish year old daughter and was just saying things like, "What are you gonna eat?? NOT just cake. NO. Healthy food. All the food groups! Same as we eat at home!" The child wasn't even speaking. It was like the mom was having a conversation with herself.
    My brother just gave me this wide eyed OMG look and the second we were away from her we basically said it in unison that that is so annoying! He said parents at the school he works at do it all the time. Like they are saying things under the ruse of talking to their child but looking at him the whole time to see his reaction.
    It seemed like everywhere I went this woman was, such a loud talker and trying to be a shining example for us all.
    Last edited by Bridget; 06-19-2011 at 05:55 PM.

  9. #20889
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    I love those kinds of dresses Kate, but the couple I've tried on made me look like I was pregnant too...or I was afraid people would think I was. I agree that he was just rude and I wouldn't let him stop me from wearing dresses I like. No one should ever ask a woman if she's pregnant, unless he actually sees a baby coming out of her vagina.

    I know the type of mom you're talking about Bridget. I agree-it's very annoying. I never comment and try very hard to not make eye contact because I don't want to encourage them!

    I'm glad you had a nice time with your dad & brother. at dbf.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  10. #20890

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    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    No one should ever ask a woman if she's pregnant, unless he actually sees a baby coming out of her vagina.
    And even then I don't really think it is appropriate

    "Any idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out." -Anton Chekhov


  11. #20891

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    Whew! IL's just left. The weekend went fine. DH called them on Thursday and told them that he expected them not to drink while watching JoJo and they agreed. And on Saturday they didn't drink as much as they usually do, just a beer at lunch and that's it. They took her back to their hotel to swim and then ate at the restaurant there for dinner, so I guess it worked out fine. It's a hard line to toe - family politics are difficult.

    My party was pretty fun - we went out with a few folks to one of our fave restaurants and then on to karaoke. We go to a place where you get a private room and it is byob. Since my dh is in the wine business, he is able to get a lot of champagne so we drank bubbly and sang really loudly and really badly for four hours. I didn't drink too much at all, really - I get heartburn these days so easily so I didn't have to worry about a hangover today, which was nice.

    "Any idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out." -Anton Chekhov


  12. #20892
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    I'm glad you had a nice time and especially that the in-laws were able to keep it together enough to spend time with JoJo.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  13. #20893

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    I'm glad everything went well with Jojo, katy.
    The dress i guess would be considered an empire waist, I don't know what else I would look good in because I know my midriff is a trouble area and the empire waists don't cling to it. I just don't know what to do, I feel like I should look good in dresses, I mean I have seen much bigger girls sport dresses and not get asked if they're pregnant. LOL
    I feel like I need a personal shopper.
    The guy who asked me if I'm pregnant just got married recently to a skinny little thing. So in rebellion I am eating crap tonight and going shopping for healthy things tomorrow.

  14. #20894
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    I'm glad your weekend went so well, Katy! That's great news.

    Kate, wear the dress. I bet you look great in it.

    Bridget, I know what you mean. I went to a holiday party for DH's work once. I remember this woman who was a bit of a social climber. After DH and I got married she asked me how I liked being the boss' wife, which struck me as odd as such a thing had genuinely never mattered to me - not that I'm not proud of DH, but I'd rather make my own life than his if you know what I mean. Anyway, we went to a party at her house and I heard he loudly telling her 2 year old "that's not purple, that's lavendar." I kind of think she was trying to show off to me what a good mother she was by teaching her daughter big words because she knows what I do for a living. Truth is, that sort of thing genuinely doesn't impress me. Pretty much fell in line with what I already thought of her.
    Last edited by Gwenn; 06-19-2011 at 08:33 PM.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  15. #20895
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    If you think you look good in those dresses then you should wear them. I've been thinking about buying one for myself anyway, even though they do 'poof' away from the midrift area. Maybe you should have asked him if his new wife has a eating disorder.

    j/k!!!

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  16. #20896

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    Quote Originally Posted by AmeriBrit View Post
    I made my Rich breakfast in bed and let him sleep as late as he wanted. We just went out for dinner because dad's eat free at a lot of the restaurants here on Father's Day, so we had tex-mex. Now, I plan on giving him a back massage later on and that should be sufficient considering all I got for Mother's Day was a box of chocolates!
    I don't mean to hijack, but....

    Tex-Mex on Great Britain?!! Where?! I lived outside of Leeds for a few years and there was one Tex-Mex restaurant in Harrogate that we'd go to that was okay-ish, but it burned down. (Bummer. The roof collapsed on my favorite Italian place not too long after that.) DH and I went to a Tex-Mex restaurant next to the Ikea in Manchester. It smelled delicious, but they put sugar in their salsa. So disappointing. We also went to The Texas Embassy in London a few times. That's the closest I came to good Tex-Mex while in England. My ultimate goal is to eventually move back (can't happen soon enough), and as a Texas girl, I need me some good Tex-Mex. (I'll take a train ride. I don't care.)
    Me: 35, DH: 44, DS: 5





  17. #20897

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    I don't know if I'll ever wear that dress again. Not if even one person thinks I look pregnant in it.

  18. #20898
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    Kate, I really think it's just the dress. I know I've heard a few guys say they thought empire waist dresses make girls look pregnant. It's the look. Don't worry about it.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  19. #20899

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    It's fine if it's the dress and not me, but what style am I supposed to wear if I don't want to look pregnant? LOL

  20. #20900
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    Just try on a few! If it has to do with spine curvature, would a cardigan or something on top help?
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  21. #20901

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    I don't know, I mean things that look good to me on a daily basis may not look good to a random person who hasn't seen me before or hasn't seen me in months because they don't know how I usually look or they don't know that I look a lot better than I used to.

  22. #20902
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    Kate, all the pictures of you I've seen look good. Just worry about looking good for you, not for random strangers. Especially not for guys with no social skills like the one who got you upset.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  23. #20903

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    I'm just upset because DH just went to bed without me. Way to make me feel great when someone just pushed my self esteem into the ground.

  24. #20904
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    Well, that will do it...
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  25. #20905

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    Seriously, I give up. I've been burned way too many times to give a **** now.

  26. #20906
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    I understand.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  27. #20907

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    Well I'm glad you do, because I sure don't...lol

  28. #20908
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    3andMe is offline Every day is a gift. It's just... does it have to be a pair of socks? Hopelessly Devoted
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    Bridget, I'm trying really hard to write to you, but Soren isn't giving me much of a chance. Even now, he's just barely fallen asleep, but he keeps waking up crying every few minutes and won't settle down. I think I'll write it in Word and then copy it over, just in case I have internet or logging out issues again.


  29. #20909

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    Poor baby Soren I'm still up too.

  30. #20910
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    Okay, done!

    We had a terrible Father's Day. Dh left tonight for Japan, and he realized he didn't have any clothes for his trip (???) so he had to go shopping. He asked the kids if they would go with him, and then go for a walk afterward. Claire said no, she would rather watch tv. We told her that wasn't a choice. She could either stay at home and do nothing and be really quiet because the baby was sleeping, or go with Daddy. "No!" she said. So he took Ro shopping, got frozen yogurt, called again after they finished, offered to pick her up on the way to the walk, and she said only if they went to a playground and not a walk. So she spent all Father's Day without her dad, refusing to spend time with him.

    I talked to her about how family was more important than tv shows, and how if she was out in the world all alone, with no mommy, no dadddy, no brothers, would she still be happy if she had just a tv show and no family? She said "No, because then I wouldn't have anyone to turn it on for me."

    (I have to pause to admire the kid logic there, for a minute.)

    So, even though it's going to be tough to take a shower or prepare dinner, I'm going to do it. No tv. Period. She's always liked it a lot, but I never thought she'd turn down a chance to go somewhere with her dad because of it.

    -----------

    Kate, I always think you look great in the pictures I see of you, too. Anyway, you have inspired me, but probably not in a way you would like. I have a shirt I love, but deep down inside I know it makes me look pregnant. My abdomen is pretty much flat, but the way this shirt is cut makes it look all poofy. Sigh. Every time I put it on, I look at it, turn around a couple of times, and then take it off and put something else on instead. I should just donate it and get it over with.

    I'm sorry you had such a bad experience. I'm sure people have thought it when I wore my shirt--they just didn't say it out loud.


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