For all that people can say about the NHS here in the UK, I love it for having regular health and dental care. Contrary to popular belief, the English do go to the dentist and encourage everyone to go every 6 months. For me, it's completely free now since I'm on maternity leave as well.
We have great insurance through DH's work. It's one thing I'm really grateful for.
I'm actually leaving work soon to go home and pick up DH and bring him to the dentist for a cleaning (and after we are going to pick up his car). I go for mine on Thursday. We do go every 6 months unless something comes up like I'm coughing too much and than it gets pushed back a little bit.
My mom was really big on going to the dentist....especially since she still had a few baby teeth in her 50's. And I don't know how they did it but my dad was laid off when I was 10...ended up at community college for two years and got something in computers...and than got a job making half of what he did and working much further from home with added gas expenses. And yet I got braces when I was 10 and had them until 13.
Cosmo could stand a cleaning twice a year too but she only goes once a year. She does NOT tolerate us brushing her teeth but I did find some breath treats for her that she likes and that don't have any liver (she's allergic to liver). Her cleanings are already $300 each time...plus I hate the thought of her going under anesthesia more than once a year.
Jennifer, 34, DH 36
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I'd sign up for a single payer system here in a heartbeat. I hate that most Americans are against it..they hear horror stories from abroad and turn a blind eye to our own problems and remain against it out of fear alone.Originally Posted by AmeriBrit
Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
I'm gonna be a Gramama!
It seems to me like the people who are against it are people who have never had to worry about not having it. Too often the assumption is made that if one does not have health insurance they are just too lazy to get a job.
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I have good insurance...well, good by American standards. My dental is 80% covered...but that 20% on top of what I owe for medical stuff is too much.
I worry about it because even with 'good' insurance there are too many loopholes. I go to a local, large medical group and it's luck of the draw if each provider is a participating one with our insurance or not. That's the lab, radiology, ER or walk-in provider...the list of possibilities is endless. Given everything Jesi's been through with the mono and later the ovarian cysts, we were charged for people/services that I wasn't aware was happening at the time. I mean, they took her back for a sonogram...I guess I should have asked who was on call and if they participated with Healthnow.
And Bobbie's bill (what's triggered my latest vent) was just lab work at a place that I was certain was a participating provider but the lab work has to be paid out of pocket toward a deductible I didn't know we had. The only other time I've had to pay toward a deductible is when I saw an eye specialist (out of network) and when I took Conner to the walk-in and the only provider working was out-of-network. So was this lab that's affiliated with our in-network group out-of-network for some reason? How do I find out AT THE TIME OF SERVICE? The receptionists are clueless when I ask them. They have no idea what insurances their staff participates with.
Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
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I wouldn't care if everything I pay for Medicare, insurance premiums and copays went into a single payer system as long as I never had to see another bill. Ever. And I wouldn't give a rip if my share was more than my neighbor's. As it is, depending on where you live some people pay more for school taxes (as well as property taxes) than other areas. *shrug* It's no different imo.
Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
I was just not very nice to Josh. I took him to his music class and reminded him, no running, no kicking (he likes to put his hands down and kick his feet up) So he said okay and we got to class and he proceeded to run around before the class even started. And wouldn't stop. I warned him many times and we ended up leaving. I blew up at him in the car because I was so embarrassed and angry. There are babies in this class he kept running by and practically knocking over. Even the teacher asked him to stop and he wouldn't listen. I asked him if he wanted to go back to the class next week because if he wasn't going to listen to me or answer me, I wasn't going to take him back. He refused to respond. So I guess we're not going back. Yay for more free time at home! (not)
I need to find classes I can drop him off at because he doesn't behave like this when I'm not around, apparently.
I'm still not entirely convinced this is normal behavior. I can't imagine anyone less than a saint wanting to put up with this!
Teeth and insurance - two sore subjects for me.
I confess I have nothing flattering about myself to report.
I was thiiiiiis close to inviting a woman who works on my floor to lunch today. She’s maybe a couple years older than me, so maybe 40, and one of the few people I’ve seen squirrel away food in the kitchen the way that I do. We’ve had a couple decent conversations about farmers markets and stuff we like to eat. But I lost my nerve after today, when she came into the office wearing a tight black turtleneck and a shiny belt over black bicycle shorts… over black striped pantyhose and black stilettos. And there was nothing ironic about the fashion statement she was trying to make from what I could tell. I overheard her telling another girl that she had asked herself if she could “pull it off” before she put it on this morning.I’m so ashamed of myself for making any sort of judgments based on what she’s wearing. However, I just can’t do it. I was afraid lunch with her would take on a creepy Robert Palmer video feeling after just a few minutes. I feel like an a-hole.
The other thing I’ve been grappling with is the realization that I am far too attached to my “stuff”. Here I am trying to pack up our house for the move in a couple of weeks, and I have mountains of things I do not need. Way more clothes than I will ever wear, more DVDs than I’ll have the time to watch, stacks of books I tell myself I’ll “get to”, 4 boxes of sewing projects, bags of beans and seeds I told myself I was going to sprout myself in mason jars for salads, cultures of things in the fridge I’m supposedly going to get back to use for fermenting beverages, this sad looking collection of over 60 varieties of epiphyllum cacti, weird pieces of jewelry and makeup and creams that I save as though I am ever going to wear jewelry and do my face on a regular basis or have any sort of skincare regimen. The list goes on. But I just could not bring myself to throw or give any of it away. The one thing I managed to toss was a 4 year old bag of Bob’s nonfat milk powder that I was going to use in a homemade ice cream recipe. Good for me.
I need to be talked into getting rid of a lot of my things. I actually did fill three 13 gallon trash bags of clothes for the thrift store, but I could have parted with so much more. With clothes, I know I hang onto way too many things because I still envision that one day, I’ll live permanently on a tropical island and flit around in gauzy, flowy garments and open-toed shoes.
Alright. I have a meeting to run off to. So that is all for now.
I'm laughing imagining that woman's getup! So could she "pull it off" besides the fact that she looked like a Robert Palmer girl?
I keep way too much stuff too. I kept all my diaries, most of my stuffed animals, a bunch of scrapbooking stuff I haven't picked up in like 2 and a half years...it's bad. I just keep thinking, I'll regret it if I throw anything away. My mom used to be so strict about keeping my stuff neat that I threw away a lot of stuff I wish I'd kept.
When I decided to move to Hawaii, I had SO MUCH STUFF. So much. I had a huge walk in closet with the most ridiculous amount of vintage/retro clothing you could imagine. My outfits looked like costumes. I actually still miss some items of clothing I gave away.
I got rid of everything but 2 suitcases worth of stuff. (I should note that all my photos and keepsakes I put at my parents, along with my quality winter clothing)
It was so hard to do but once I started I found it was incredibly liberating. My roommate and I put everything in the yard and had a yard sale. Then we took the money from that and bought a keg of beer, invited all of our friends over and sent everyone home with what was left of our stuff.
I felt so light and free when I got on that plane. It was awesome.
Last edited by Bridget; 02-15-2011 at 03:47 PM.
So, you wouldn't charge your dad at all but you'd charge her a ton ... so just divide what you want to charge her in half and it's probably a fair price!I sent them both an email last night letting them know what was taking so long. Dad wrote and said to just send him a billI don't even know what to charge. Like I said, I wouldn't charge my father anything.
I can't talk about specific travel dates (which is good because I don't have them anyway) but he will be back in AZ in mid-April some time. He'll be in the US sooner than that but I can't say when. It's getting sooner!
We still use XP at work and I really wish they would update. That and this stupid home-made program they are constantly developing for our internal special ed documents.
Question for those of you in the computer industry - is it really too much to ask that the developers of our home-made program include the capability to use specialized characters (International Phonetical Alphabet) which is standard in my profession and we all use when writing pencil and paper? When working with speech sounds the ability to write the specific sounds in a specific way is necessary but the computer programmer won't do it because it isn't "parent-friendly." Which I think means she doesn't want to be bothered. It's easy to make parent friendly by just including sample words. 6 paragraphs discussing (but not explaining the meaning or relevance of) normative information and standardization samples, which she is including in the evaluation report template without questioning, is the most non-parent friendly thing I can imagine.
This makes the most sense to me. Good luck, whatever happens!
Yikes, me too. I know I haven't been to the dentist since I turned 25 and was dropped from my parents insurance. I have had private dental insurance for 4 years now and I also qualify for Tricare at the moment, and I still am terrified to go see the dentist because I hate my teeth so much. I wore braces for 5 years and my teeth were still crooked when they were removed. My teeth are the one thing I am most embarrassed of/sensitive about. Ick.
I can't say when the last time I went to the dentist was...it's embarrassing. But with our current pile of medical bills, I don't see it happening any time soon.
I don't think I would have invited the woman out, either. And I'm a pack-rat, too. DH is a hoarder, so we're a bad combination.I was thiiiiiis close to inviting a woman who works on my floor to lunch today. She’s maybe a couple years older than me, so maybe 40, and one of the few people I’ve seen squirrel away food in the kitchen the way that I do. We’ve had a couple decent conversations about farmers markets and stuff we like to eat. But I lost my nerve after today, when she came into the office wearing a tight black turtleneck and a shiny belt over black bicycle shorts… over black striped pantyhose and black stilettos. And there was nothing ironic about the fashion statement she was trying to make from what I could tell. I overheard her telling another girl that she had asked herself if she could “pull it off” before she put it on this morning.
The other thing I’ve been grappling with is the realization that I am far too attached to my “stuff”. Here I am trying to pack up our house for the move in a couple of weeks, and I have mountains of things I do not need. Way more clothes than I will ever wear, more DVDs than I’ll have the time to watch, stacks of books I tell myself I’ll “get to”, 4 boxes of sewing projects, bags of beans and seeds I told myself I was going to sprout myself in mason jars for salads, cultures of things in the fridge I’m supposedly going to get back to use for fermenting beverages, this sad looking collection of over 60 varieties of epiphyllum cacti, weird pieces of jewelry and makeup and creams that I save as though I am ever going to wear jewelry and do my face on a regular basis or have any sort of skincare regimen. The list goes on. But I just could not bring myself to throw or give any of it away. The one thing I managed to toss was a 4 year old bag of Bob’s nonfat milk powder that I was going to use in a homemade ice cream recipe. Good for me.
I need to be talked into getting rid of a lot of my things. I actually did fill three 13 gallon trash bags of clothes for the thrift store, but I could have parted with so much more. With clothes, I know I hang onto way too many things because I still envision that one day, I’ll live permanently on a tropical island and flit around in gauzy, flowy garments and open-toed shoes.
Alright. I have a meeting to run off to. So that is all for now.
I always love your stories!
Me (38) DH (45) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12
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Kate, it sounds like you both had a bad day. I've had those moments with Conner too. And Sydney....although it's been a few years since Sydney has done it so there's hope.
Mandy, I don't think it's too much to ask but I wonder if the programmer is just lazy. ??
We've had proprietary stuff written here that all the admins have to use for either faculty or student tracking that was only compatible with IE 6. They just got around to making it compatible with IE 8. Talk about security risks! Those computers were also used to access things on the world wide web and Microsoft hasn't supported IE 6 in a very, very long time. Being responsible for our network's security, that was a real thorn in my side. I almost think they only 'allowed' IE 8 because it has better backwards compatibility than IE 7 did.
Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
Oh! I forgot to tell the Dunkin Donuts fiasco! It's another long story...basically, he was completely confusing. LOL
We had a coupon for an egg sandwich so I was going to take him (I know, it's a terrible frozen fake egg thing, but this is a very rare occasion.) Well for some reason he thought he was getting a donut even though I said this morning we weren't getting donuts and he said that's okay! The kid was so excited for DD that after school he came up and hugged me and didn't even want to go to the library first. (This is a big deal) Then he got to the place and was so disappointed in his sandwich he just deflated. But he ended up eating most of it...after I was all ready to go and was getting his coat on, he pushed me away and started eating. I was so confused. It was blazing hot in there, and he refused to take his coat off, then he wanted to take the little bit he had left home, and when we got home he said "I don't want it." Where is the head exploding smiley?
The funny part is a LOT of our research comes from British journals....I'm not even in the huge research library (have access to one though I'm a smaller hospital one)....and even I have a number of journals from the UK...since I had to learn different spellings for already difficult terms, they are easy to spot. The UK, many European and especially Australia are way ahead too in terms of evidence based medicine and evidence based practice. It is kind of surprising how much of medicine differs from place to place and the reasoning for doing something a certain is "because that is how we have always done it". For some things there is a ton of research....for others, nothing much out there.
Jennifer, 34, DH 36
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I swear we need to hang out. Conner does that sort of thing too. At the dr's he refused to take his coat off even though it was hot. I thought it was because he was afraid of getting his shots, but when he got uber warm he did ask for it off. Then when we were getting ready to leave (and after getting his vaxs, he was ready to leave!) he refused to put his coat on. I had to pretend not to care and said, "Ok, let me know when you're ready to get your coat on so we can go." and I sat down and started reading a magazine. That worked that time, but sometimes he's stubborn and it takes a while. I try to avoid 'fighting' with him as much as possible.
Conner is also very finicky about eating warm food. Like his dinner has to feel cold before he'll eat it. We always make his plate and put it in the fridge to cool off for him. Tonight he was bugging for it and we stalled him as long as we could, knowing it'd be too warm. After a while Rich got it and tested it and it was a normally acceptable temperature, and Conner suddenly decided he wasn't hungry. So back in the fridge it went.
I don't know why he does that, but it happens. As much as possible I simply try not to make things an issue if they don't have to be. I'm not very strict on making the kids eat when supper is ready. They all eat whenever they're hungry.
Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
it is stupidity too....I have it now, but there is always in the back of my head what if I lost my job. I would be SOL. thank god WI has a high risk pool for my sister....she tried to buy insurance and she has a job (just no benefits)...but was denied because she had previous ear surgery YEARS and YEARS ago, like more than 7 or 8 years ago.
Jennifer, 34, DH 36
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I was involved in a heated debate on another forum about health care. I made a comment about our current system being far from as great as people are led to believe it is and even mentioned the higher rates of infant mortality, heart disease and stroke that we have compared with other nations. This was one of the responses I got,
Oh come on Chrissy, really? Far from an excellent place for healthcare? You do realize how ungrateful that sounds, right? We are so blessed to live in a country where our health bills are high because of the excellent technology we have to keep people alive. We're talking about accessibility here, not technology and efficiency. We have incredible healthcare options, they're just not open to everyone.
Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
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I think my favorite part is how we're blessed to have such incredibly high medical bills.Puh-leeze.
You know I can vent about this for days and days. *sigh* I wish we could do something about it.
Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
I think that sometimes it is hard for programmers to deal with specific professional requirements. I know that they try really hard to get IT people in bigger libraries who have the MLIS degree also. Asking for something to be done in a way that makes sense to us, request forms, current awareness, circulation stuff, ILL stuff....doesn't always seem to click with the programmers.
I'm so thankful that we don't have to deal with that since we are a 3 person hospital library and the parent major research library is 2 hours away and they have a big staff to deal with it.
I'm very attached to my stuff. I'm good about tossing some things and DH hates clutter so he's pretty big on not bringing something new home until I know that I'm really going to use it, I know it has a place and I really really want it. Result is that I tend to REALLY be attached to whatever I finally decided on since I research most purchases a while before getting. Took over two months to get a new flat iron!
Clothes...well I have changed sizes a lot over the past 6 years...losing a LOT of weight and than gaining back 30-35% of that. So I have a lot of stuff in different sizes. I would like to get into my smaller sizes again...would have to steal from my sister since she lost weight and I gave some things to her with the idea that I would like to get them back when I need them...and hopefully she would have lost even more and wouldn't need them either.
Jennifer, 34, DH 36
Yeah we do have SOME really great healthcare institutions....and I would say that I feel lucky since I work at one of them. And even still i have a deductible and 20% coinsurance.
There are some interesting ideas out there about how to help bring costs down....one issue is how docs are paid, the sicker you are, the more tests that are done, the more money is made....is screwed up. I know mine place has been really pushing for pay based on quality of care, not quantity of care.
there is also the idea of a medical home...I don't know much about it yet but something along the ideas getting people into primary care and getting things under control before they spiral.
electronic medical records are really helpful. So last year I saw a derm, gyn, and endocrine doc....trying to see if I might have PCOS. It was great that each one could pull up my labs and see what had been done recently so we didn't have to run say 4 TSH's checking my thyroid.
Jennifer, 34, DH 36
I guess I'm stuck on what should and shouldn't be an issue. I know they say pick your battles but I just never know what battles to pick. Everything gets on my nerves lately. Like wasting food, I don't like that. Having a discussion in which I thought he understood what he was getting at Dunkin and then finding out he wanted a donut? There was a picture of the egg sandwich on the coupon and everything. I even said he wasn't getting a donut. I just don't know where communication broke down on that one. I think I just suck at this.
I called my mom tonight and found out her boyfriend of quite a few years now didn't do anything for her for Valentines day
I'm really confused and angry for her. He's an incredibly sweet guy (from what I see, anyway) and I don't know how he dropped the ball on that one. He told her he was going to get something for her on Thursday but he had to work late. So why not pick up some last minute flowers or chocolate at least?
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Everyone has different ideals on what is acceptable or not when it comes to their kids. I think the key is consistency, but I know that's nearly impossible to accomplish when every little thing is getting to you.
As for changing his mind, imo that's not very surprising. I went into Dunkin Donuts Saturday with the intention of buying a coffee and walked out with a hot chocolate instead (hello calories!). It happens, people change their minds. 4-year-olds are no exception.
I'm not criticizing but trying to use an example...I wouldn't take Conner to McDonalds and expect him to only choose the apple slices once we were there. I'm pretty sure he'd want french fries, no matter what we discussed ahead of time.
As for valentines day, I really don't understand why people get disappointed, hurt or even angry if they don't get something. Maybe it's because we didn't really do much when I was growing up, but I don't expect anything from Rich...and I generally don't get anything. And that's ok. I'm more worried about how things are throughout the rest of the year. A lack of a v-day gift does not in any way indicate a lack of appreciation or love for me. At least, that's how I feel about it. It was wonderful when he did send me something though.
Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
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Oh, and Kate I wanted to say you absolutely do not suck at this. I didn't feel certain of anything when I went through it the first time. I thought my kids were out of control and I was an absolute failure at times. If Jesi weren't an 'oops' I likely wouldn't have had any more just because I was so convinced in my utter lack of ability to be a good mother.
A smarter, older woman with adult children at the time told me that good mothers always doubt themselves. It's the ones that are certain they're perfect that are the worst in reality. I took her words to heart and kept reminding myself of that every time I thought I was doing it all wrong.
Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
Thanks Chrissy
I think Valentine's day is important to a lot of women...and just for that reason men should honor it even if they don't get it. That's just what I think. I admire your ability to not care but I'd be really upset if DH forgot. (I mean how can you forget, with all the commercials, and the decorations in every store you go, the cards, the candy....)
That is exactly what I tell DH....he is scared to be a dad even though he wants a kid and worries a lot about not being a good enough dad (his own dad sucks and his stepdad sucked even more). I tell that because he cares enough to actually worry about it, just shows that he will be a good dad. He won't be perfect because no parent is....but he really cares which is exactly what a child needs, someone who really cares about them.
Jennifer, 34, DH 36
I didn't get anything for Valentines day either. I didn't want anything. We usually do not do anything for it....I don't like being told that just because it's 2-14 that we have to be romantic. I did like it when we were first dating because it's cool at first when you actually have a boyfriend for the date. But now, after 13 years, I would much rather have romance happen as a surprise or on our timetable, not Hallmarks.
I do however like and expect at least a card for our anniversary and my birthday.
Jennifer, 34, DH 36
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