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Thread: Secular Confessions

  1. #15001
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    Hmm, guess I'm in the minority on that! I don't at work really other than to just say oh I'm not really all that religious or something like that. And I would say that most of DH's family doesn't know we are agnostic and don't really talk about it with them. They are all believers...Catholic and Lutheran....and the one uncle and grandpa are REALLY into church. Just not in a pushy way.
    My family is probably mostly believers but wouldn't call themselves christians and none go to church except me. LOL I would say spiritual would be a better word though my dad is kind of atheist.
    My BFF and I talk about stuff like this...well mostly it's through email since we're in different cities and she likes to discuss things about as much as do though I'm way more out there than she is. And religion is a biggie we have talked about many times. She was raised with it but her DH is Hindu and that is what they are raising their kids with. Very complicated but interesting to learn more about.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  2. #15002

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    Well, yes I've talked to my best friend about it. And dbf. But other than that I see no need to discuss it. It's kind of personal and never really comes up. My extended family is very Catholic and that included my older brother and his family. I don't talk about it with any of them because they strongly disagree and we'd just be talking in circles. I don't talk politics with my extended family either for the same reasons. I like to talk to people who agree with me (and that's not many 'round here). Preferably around a campfire with a cold beer or mug of red wine.

  3. #15003

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    I talk about my beliefs, when it's appropriate, particularly around the holiday season, when Christians are largely making church and god and jesus references.



  4. #15004
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    Quote Originally Posted by bridgetwu75 View Post
    I like to talk to people who agree with me (and that's not many 'round here). Preferably around a campfire with a cold beer or mug of red wine.
    I'm there!!

    Quote Originally Posted by stash View Post
    I talk about my beliefs, when it's appropriate, particularly around the holiday season, when Christians are largely making church and god and jesus references.
    I'm tempted to say something whenever I hear "Jesus is the reason for the season" in public...it's always said with disdain. Another Christian fluck you I guess.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  5. #15005

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    Yep, forget about love, sharing food and gifts and time together, and family...it's all about Jesus!

  6. #15006

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    Speaking of which, instead of bless you, we've started saying "cheeses for your sneezes!"



  7. #15007
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    You know, I've been thinking and thinking about the best response for sneezes, and for me, the best way to handle them is to say nothing if you're the observer or else "excuse me" if you're the sneezer, just like with coughing or belching or passing gas. Sneezing is actually more impolite (for disease transmission) than some of those other ones, just as uncontrollable, and should be politely ignored.

    Can you tell half my family ancestry is WASP-y?

    Anyway, I've put some thought into it, pros and cons for a bunch of different sneeze responses. And I decided it works for us to not have a response.


  8. #15008
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    Lol. I like that, Lydia. We say 'tissues' when someone sneezes around here. My mil started it but I like it.

  9. #15009

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    Okay so dbf suggested Bella. Not bad I must say. I had suggested Anabella at one point and he shot it down but that's okay. We'll still let him think it was his idea. So, it's like the first name that we've even remotely agreed on. Then he comes downstairs later and says, "Oh, my mom doesn't like that name. She thinks it's a dog name."
    Really, dude? Like I care if his mom likes it or not. Sorry, but come on.

  10. #15010

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    Oh no not Bella! Sorry...I'm anti-Twilight LOL
    Seriously though...please not Bella. We say Bless you...It's just habit and I don't think of it like 'God bless you' but just like, bless you and whatever part of your soul that comes out of you when you sneeze Just kidding...

  11. #15011

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    Oh really? Twilight? I've never seen nor read even a smidge of it so I had no idea....

  12. #15012
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    I like Bella...I don't know anything about Twightlight either. What about naming her Anabella and just calling her Bella as a nickname? His mother gets no vote, sorry!! lol

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  13. #15013

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    I like Bella too but also don't like the whole Twilight reference. I read somewhere that Bella is making a rise in names because of Twilight. I am tempted to read the books because friends of mine IRL and here on APA I have heard that the books condone young teenage girls into basically devoting their lives to abusive or controlling relationships with boys/young men. But I just can't bring myself to read them. I do like the name though. I met a BEAUTIFUL little girl named Bella before.

    I also don't speak to anyone about my religious leanings. My mom, who I have told I am not religious for probably 10 years now, recently asked me if I believe Jesus was the son of God and she was disappointed that I didn't believe that and she felt that I was keeping my religious leanings from her. But I just don't think it is all that important. Religion is the most major thing in my mom's life though and I had to explain that to her God is always on her mind but me, not at all really. I don't think about it and don't speak about it unless the kids ask me something or I hear people I know speak negatively about nonbelievers. I am not ashamed or my nonbelief or scared that people will know what I think about religion, it's just that I focus on living in the present and right now I don't have time to think about dying or what will happen then. I have to make sure Elle doesn't pour oatmeal on her head or something LOL.

    Erin

  14. #15014
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    Bella is cute and yup that is the main character in Twilight..she's the girl that is in love with Edward the vampire and just friends with Jacob the werewolf who also loves her.
    People will think it was after Twilight (which I happen to like ).

    And yup who cares what MIL's or anyone else thinks. I got a few looks for our top boy name Theodore and a few faces for our second boy name of Harrison....don't care!

    I have a turkey in the oven! Been cooking forever it feels like but it's a 14 lb one....
    I only have one oven that will be very busy tomorrow...so turkey is getting done tonight and will go in the frig with some of the turkey broth so it stays moist while reheating tomorrow. My BFF is bringing sweet potatoes....I have never had sweet potatoes before!

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  15. #15015

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    My mom is bringing sweet potatoes...I'm not a big fan but DH loves them. I'm nervous about the turkey...it's the first time I've done a whole stuffed one. Usually I just do a breast for us, but with company I thought it best to do a whole one.

  16. #15016
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    I got a whole one because it was so incredibly cheap. For just us, i usually just do a breast too. But I have someone else bringing stuffing.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  17. #15017
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    We have a 22 lb bird & I can't wait to stuff it!! 5-5.5 hours it should be. mmmm We have 5 pies for desert...I've gained 10 lbs just thinking about it

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  18. #15018
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ky'sMom View Post
    ... I don't think about it and don't speak about it unless the kids ask me something or I hear people I know speak negatively about nonbelievers. I am not ashamed or my nonbelief or scared that people will know what I think about religion, it's just that I focus on living in the present and right now I don't have time to think about dying or what will happen then. I have to make sure Elle doesn't pour oatmeal on her head or something LOL.

    Erin
    I just love this.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  19. #15019
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    Can I just say, I'm so thankful that teens aren't as horrible as society would lead one to believe. Sure, they're challenging, but they have their moments. Jessica took this one of her and Bobbie's friend Derek:



    Derek is a typical teenage boy, always razzing on his friends, quick witted, has an answer for everything...but he knows Conner looks up to him and his behavior around Conner is impeccable. These are the moments I didn't anticipate and I'm so grateful for.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  20. #15020
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    Aw, Chrissy, that pic is adorable!

    Happy Thanksgiving, y'all!

  21. #15021

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    Aww, too cute.
    I figure teens are like little adults--some of them are good with kids, some are not, some are responsible some are not, etc. Some already have the maturity of an adult and some never get there.

    Actually I was more of a kid person when I was a teen than I am now, LOL. I used to babysit allll the time.

    Happy Thanksgiving!

  22. #15022

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    Right, so Lydia, in our house it would be strange not to acknowledge a sneeze, since burps and farts are also met with a chorus of laughter and excuse mes.



  23. #15023

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    I just ordered my birthing kit!!!
    Also, my CSA farmer called me on thursday and said she had tons of leftover veggies and wondered if I'd like to buy some for wholesale price. Um YES. I now have loads of organic spinach, carrots, potato, squash, broccoli, cabbage and garlic.
    These sorts of things really excite me. I'm a dork.

  24. #15024

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    Don't feel dorky, I got a Butterball turkey for the first time this year and I was giddy over the lifting device and the detailedness of the directions. "They even tell you how to carve it!" I squealed to DH.

  25. #15025

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    Quote Originally Posted by stash View Post
    Right, so Lydia, in our house it would be strange not to acknowledge a sneeze, since burps and farts are also met with a chorus of laughter and excuse mes.
    That's really interesting. I actually feel offended if DH doesn't say bless you. I say bless you every time he sneezes...even after each sneeze in a series LOL
    (he probably thinks I'm annoying)

  26. Default

    I confess reality slapped me yesterday concerning the guy.

    He's super sweet, but absolutely content being a prep cook / dishwasher.

    I am not okay with that.

  27. #15027
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    My dh just sent me a fascinating article that is a little lengthy, about how schizophrenia and bipolar disorder and MS might be caused by a virus. The virus is actually in the DNA already, and may be activated by an infection near birth.

    The first, pivotal infection by toxoplasmosis or influenza (and subsequent flaring up of HERV-W) might happen shortly before or after birth. That would explain the birth-month effect: Flu infections happen more often in winter. The initial infection could then set off a lifelong pattern in which later infections reawaken HERV-W, causing more inflammation and eventually symptoms. This process explains why schizophrenics gradually lose brain tissue. It explains why the disease waxes and wanes like a chronic infection. And it could explain why some schizophrenics suffer their first psychosis after a mysterious, monolike illness.


  28. #15028
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    Interesting Lydia! Doesn't that seem to run in families though?


    I know I have also seen some interesting things about how at least some obesity might be linked to a virus.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  29. #15029
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    I'm sorry Ashley.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  30. #15030
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    Quote Originally Posted by The10Eels View Post
    I confess reality slapped me yesterday concerning the guy.

    He's super sweet, but absolutely content being a prep cook / dishwasher.

    I am not okay with that.
    Boo...but at least you're 'out there' and meeting people. He can still be a great friend and someone to kill time with.

    Quote Originally Posted by Lydia View Post
    My dh just sent me a fascinating article that is a little lengthy, about how schizophrenia and bipolar disorder and MS might be caused by a virus. The virus is actually in the DNA already, and may be activated by an infection near birth.
    Oh wow, I am going to check that article out.

    Quote Originally Posted by Cosmosmom View Post
    Interesting Lydia! Doesn't that seem to run in families though?


    I know I have also seen some interesting things about how at least some obesity might be linked to a virus.
    Yes, but that bit she quoted said the virus is in the DNA already, so it's not saying that it's not genetically passed down.

    What I find interesting is that out of 9 kids, 3 of my grandmother's children have serious mental illnesses. 2 (my mom and her sister Debbie) have bipolar disorder. Mom's was pretty bad, but Debbie's was worse. Mom can have a conversation with people and most days they wouldn't notice anything 'off' about her...maybe she's a little loud, but that's the only obvious sign. Many people are loud and not mentally ill, so I doubt many people would make that connection. Debbie, however, is just a mess and has been for over 20 years. It's really sad because she was beautiful and in college...and now she has little common sense (perhaps a side effect of her medication) and speaks very slowly, drawing out and slurring her words. She has that 'look' on her face that says she's utterly clueless all the time. Bill, the 3rd one with a serious mental illness, hasn't been diagnosed with bipolar, but schizophrenia. He's also a pedophile. Not sure if that's related to his mental illness or what...but he's very different than his sisters even though it's obvious crazy runs deep in that family.

    In the last year, my cousin (from that same family) was diagnosed with MS. She was asked if there's a family history of MS, but there isn't. So my long post is just that I think it's feasible the 3 could be caused by a virus or something else in the DNA that causes these issues later in life.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


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