Secular Confessions

[The10Eels]

I wanna know!! Do we know if it's girl/boy yet??

No Stupid Medicaid... Im going in to the DR tomorrow to set up a new patient whatever they called it.. lol and I am disputing the medicaid denial.. so they will just have to do a back-pay...

But names...

Boy - Bennett Dale
Girl - Harper Rhaelynn

[WillowSpy]

I confess I Harper.

[The10Eels]

I confess I Harper.

Me too... That is one I mentioned to DH, but he kinda already said no... He says its the name of a dog on some Cop show...

He doesn't know how in love I am with it though.... I'm waiting till we get an ultrasound to tell him. No point in being upset if its not another girl... ya know?

[WillowSpy]

A dog on a Cop show?

My DH would never agree to Harper either, he says it sounds like "Harpie"

[The10Eels]

I confess DH pisses me off with all his excuses to veto names I like..

When we were PG with Audri we were thinking of boys names, and its kind of a tradition to give boys a B name with Dale as the middle... So I really liked Brody and Brayden.
DH said no because :

Brody - He didn't want his son to grow up and always do Brodys..
Brayden - No son of his will grow up and be "Brayden" his hair...

[Janeen]

I confess DH pisses me off with all his excuses to veto names I like..

When we were PG with Audri we were thinking of boys names, and its kind of a tradition to give boys a B name with Dale as the middle... So I really liked Brody and Brayden.
DH said no because :

Brody - He didn't want his son to grow up and always do Brodys..
Brayden - No son of his will grow up and be "Brayden" his hair...

He can't be serious, right?

[The10Eels]

Hes totally serious.. He says kids can be mean, (Which yes, they can...) so he tries to think of the worst things people can say about a name...

[Janeen]

Hes totally serious.. He says kids can be mean, (Which yes, they can...) so he tries to think of the worst things people can say about a name...

I've heard everything from jelly bean to d*** fiend (taken from an old rap song by Too Short) and I still love my name.

For us, a daughter will be named Denaysia June and a boy will be James Donald and that's that. If they get teased, well, kids will be kids.

I don't know, the things people can make out of names has never played a role in my choosing.

[WillowSpy]

It won't make any sense in English, but when my mom wanted to name me Isabella, my dad vetoed because of this really lame pun/joke in Polish. It was seriously along the lines of the "Brayden hair" excuse.

[sunrider]

As soon as my latest Immodium starts working, I'll try to post a list of what I do. It's pretty simple.

Hey, no rush. Your health is SOOO much more important.

lol.. I love it!

Audri farted in bed last night, and I thought it was DH... We both burst out laughing..

:LOL: Last week we thought Liam was going to catch air in the living room - he sounded like he was jet-propelled.

Hes totally serious.. He says kids can be mean, (Which yes, they can...) so he tries to think of the worst things people can say about a name...

Exactly - kids CAN be mean. And there's nothing you can do to stop it. Even if you find a name that HE can't think of anything to tease with doesn't mean kids won't be able to figure something out if that's their motivation. What a strange way of choosing a baby name. I think the only thing we tried to make sure of was that his initials didn't spell anything bad or weird.

[AlishaAnew]

I confess...wigger!

[Janeen]

Whew, I'm glad you laughed.

I confess that sometimes I really worry about the perception of my sense of humor.

[WillowSpy]

we tried to make sure of was that his initials didn't spell anything bad or weird.

^^ Yea... a name combo I really liked ended up with the initials JEW... that's definitely shelved now.

[Janeen]

Even in the initial category we're safe. DJR for a girl and JDR for a boy.

Unless they started making up mean phrases based off of the initials but you could come up with many for any set of initials I'm sure lol

[sunrider]

We try the "That's not yours" and she gets it sometimes... Maybe just being persistant will help. lol

I've been saying "Not for babies", but I think I like this better.

I confess that I'm using the "dog and pony" style of discipline on my son. Allow me to explain.
At an obedience/puppy class they taught that instead of telling your dog NO when she's doing something, say EH EH in a harsh voice. Not loud, but firmly. They learn to associate the sound (and not a word) with something they shouldn't be doing.
A few years later I found myself (in a class at a university) finish the training on a green-broke horse. Out of habit with the dog, I used EH EH on the horse. To my surprise (and the instructor's) it worked beautifully. We got the award that semester for "Most Improved Horse".
I told myself if I ever had kids, I was going to use the same method.

So last week he was getting into something that he really shouldn't have (I don't even remember what it was). No, and No touch, was not working, whether it came from me or from Tred. I told him, "let me take the next one". The hand reached out, I delivered a well timed EH EH and kept a stern look on my face (it's so hard not to smile at him!). he dropped that hand, looked at me and stuck the lower lip out. He tried again, same thing. And then went off and did something else. I may not use it for everything, but definitely when I need to get his attention quickly (like if he's about to stick a fork in an outlet).

[The10Eels]

I've been saying "Not for babies", but I think I like this better.

I confess that I'm using the "dog and pony" style of discipline on my son. Allow me to explain.
At an obedience/puppy class they taught that instead of telling your dog NO when she's doing something, say EH EH in a harsh voice. Not loud, but firmly. They learn to associate the sound (and not a word) with something they shouldn't be doing.
A few years later I found myself (in a class at a university) finish the training on a green-broke horse. Out of habit with the dog, I used EH EH on the horse. To my surprise (and the instructor's) it worked beautifully. We got the award that semester for "Most Improved Horse".
I told myself if I ever had kids, I was going to use the same method.

So last week he was getting into something that he really shouldn't have (I don't even remember what it was). No, and No touch, was not working, whether it came from me or from Tred. I told him, "let me take the next one". The hand reached out, I delivered a well timed EH EH and kept a stern look on my face (it's so hard not to smile at him!). he dropped that hand, looked at me and stuck the lower lip out. He tried again, same thing. And then went off and did something else. I may not use it for everything, but definitely when I need to get his attention quickly (like if he's about to stick a fork in an outlet).

I was unknowingly doing the same thing. My mom and I both made a EH EH sound to Audri but DH didn't like it, and said she won't learn that it means No/Don't touch if we are just making noises at her...

[elmobo-n-lexi]

There’s no reason that the government should prevent homosexuals from entering civil marriages because some religions object to the concept, any more than the government should ban atheism because some religions object to it!

I found this and LOVE it!

[The10Eels]

Exactly - kids CAN be mean. And there's nothing you can do to stop it. Even if you find a name that HE can't think of anything to tease with doesn't mean kids won't be able to figure something out if that's their motivation. What a strange way of choosing a baby name. I think the only thing we tried to make sure of was that his initials didn't spell anything bad or weird.

Yeah.. I think his underlying motive is that he really wants to name a son after his dad - Bobby Dale. But I don't like it. I mean, I like it for his dad perfectly fine. It fits him, but I don't envision Bobby as a baby's name, nor a grown up name... Its like a child's nickname to me... kwim?

[Janeen]

Just my opinion but I think using an off the wall noise (such as EH EH) would be less confusing than using words that could be/are used in every day vocabulary. Especially when paired with facial expressions.

[Janeen]

There’s no reason that the government should prevent homosexuals from entering civil marriages because some religions object to the concept, any more than the government should ban atheism because some religions object to it!

I found this and LOVE it!

It loves you too. It told me so.

[WillowSpy]

Yeah.. I think his underlying motive is that he really wants to name a son after his dad - Bobby Dale. But I don't like it. I mean, I like it for his dad perfectly fine. It fits him, but I don't envision Bobby as a baby's name, nor a grown up name... Its like a child's nickname to me... kwim?

I know exactly what you mean. My cousin is called Bobby to this day, and it became really weird once he got out of junior high (to me, at least). DH is a Robert too, he goes by Robert or Rob. There's a high probability that we'd name a boy Robert after him, but not Bobby

[maggie]

Words are just 'noises' too, though, right? If the sound always means roughly the same thing (basically: don't), then that sounds less confusing to me than 'no', which is used widely. I think.

[Janeen]

I know exactly what you mean. My cousin is called Bobby to this day, and it became really weird once he got out of junior high (to me, at least). DH is a Robert too, he goes by Robert or Rob. There's a high probability that we'd name a boy Robert after him, but not Bobby

I have an Uncle Bobby who is actually a Robert. He is such a Bobby though, the name fits him perfectly.

[maggie]

There’s no reason that the government should prevent homosexuals from entering civil marriages because some religions object to the concept, any more than the government should ban atheism because some religions object to it!

I found this and LOVE it!

Yeah, but I bet there are plenty of people that would be happy to ban atheism!

[sunrider]

Words are just 'noises' too, though, right? If the sound always means roughly the same thing (basically: don't), then that sounds less confusing to me than 'no', which is used widely. I think.

Very true.
I'm sure we'll use No and Don't when he develops a vocabulary. But for the early stuff I think I like eh eh better.

And I like the name Bennett, btw.

[3andMe]

I like Harper! And Bennett.

[3andMe]

Ugh. I am sooooo sick. I took the maximum daily allowance of Immodium plus a ton of Pepto Bismol by 11 am and could barely manage to stay out of the bathroom long enough to get the twins down for their nap. Luckily they fell asleep quickly, but it's times like this I really wish they could fall asleep independently. I had chicken broth and Immodium for lunch.

Anyway, I think I have five minutes to sit here now, so I can answer the photography question. Rin is the photographer in this section, so she is probably better equipped to answer detailed questions, but I get asked this question in PM about once a month and I have a brief list of things I do that anyone can do to make their baby pictures look decent.

First of all, I don't have a really good camera. I have a decent camera, but it's not great, and it's more than five years old. What I do are the following:

1. Create a plain or uncluttered background. If I'm indoors, I drape a white or plain colored sheet against where I'm taking pictures. If I'm outdoors, I always try to look beyond the subject to what is in the background--if there are a bunch of people, or power poles, or debris, I change my angle to shoot against the sky or the ground or a nice view or I just don't take the picture if I can't clean up the background. If we're doing an interesting activity indoors and I'll be taking pictures, I usually drape the whole kitchen table and the window behind it with sheets and let them do whatever it is right there.

2. Get a removable flash. That way, you can not use the flash that is on your camera that creates harsh lighting and redeye, and you can angle it off to one side and bounce it off the ceiling or walls to create a pleasant natural light effect. The picture in my signature now was created with the flash set to be a little brighter than usual, and it bounced off the upper right wall, but it looks bright and natural

Another trick a photographer friend taught me when I was having so much trouble taking Christmas pictures of the twins was to set them down in front of a video. This current picture I took by dragging a recliner in front of the computer, draping a sheet over it, and playing a Baby Einstein video. Obviously they're in a daze watching it, and I couldn't get them to smile or look at me, but it's better than them climbing all over the place like monkeys.

Those are my tricks. Hope that helps!

ETA: Bounced the flash off the upper left wall if you're looking at the picture. I'm too used to thinking in anatomical terms.

[The10Eels]

Another trick a photographer friend taught me when I was having so much trouble taking Christmas pictures of the twins was to set them down in front of a video. This current picture I took by dragging a recliner in front of the computer, draping a sheet over it, and playing a Baby Einstein video. Obviously they're in a daze watching it, and I couldn't get them to smile or look at me, but it's better than them climbing all over the place like monkeys.

Those are my tricks. Hope that helps!

Thats pretty neat!!

[amorton1437]

I confess my DH was arrested this morning. I got woken up after 4 hours of sleep to go get his stupid ass. then we had to pay $150 to get his car out of impound So much for saving for the baby, all this kind of crap always happens!

[Janeen]

I confess my DH was arrested this morning. I got woken up after 4 hours of sleep to go get his stupid ass. then we had to pay $150 to get his car out of impound So much for saving for the baby, all this kind of crap always happens!

I confess that I remember when my DH got a DUI (his fourth but only one since we have been together). I was with him and bawling like a baby when he was arrested but then I found myself very angry the next morning and I made him find his own way home once he got out of detox.

This was well over two years ago and we are still paying for it since he has the blow machine in his car and has to have that for two years.