I contract every single day. Sometimes painfully hard and other times I can continue through them. Sometimes they last hours on end and sometimes just an hour. This has gone on for 8 days!
It hurts to move. Walk. Breathe. Bend over. I just hurt!
I'm so defeated. Mentally and emotionally barely hanging in there.
My children are really paying the price as I can hardly function and I'm so irritable and impatient. I feel like the worst mom ever.
It is easy to say just get help. Let the house be messy. Blah blah blah. That isn't reality.
Most the day I just want to cry. Feeling so guilty I can't mother my children very well right now.
:( one hour at a time.
I'm sorry you're having such a hard time right now. I hope things start to look up soon! :comfort:
:( I'm so sorry this has been a tremendously challenging 8 days for you :hugs::hugs::hugs:!
When is your next mw appt? How far dilated are you? Have you tried magnesium to see if you can get your uterus to calm down for a few days so you can rest...it might really help your nerves too, I know mine would be completely shot by that point :conf:. Lavendar oil rubbed on your belly after a warm epsom salt bath and chamomile tea might help too. I have no idea if you're looking for suggestions or just need to vent a bit, but thought I'd throw those ideas out there (maybe you already thought of them??) :).
I completely understand that there are some things you just can't let go of...laundry, dishes, meals...they *have* to get done and with a lot of little ones you're really the only one who can do those things. I will absolutely be praying for strength and peace for you. I know the uncertainty is extremely hard...I'd love to say my homebirths were filled with certainty, joy, stability, strength, and confidence, but they weren't. I have long, difficult labors and my hbs were far more challenging than my hospital births because I knew as long as baby and I were holding up I just had to wait it out. There was no pit to augment, no time-frame when I had to deliver, no one was in a rush to get baby out which was one of the greatest aspects of having a hb...but sometimes it was also the hardest part to endure. Soon though, you'll be holding Micah in your arms and this part will seem far away :wub:.
Thinking of you Ashlee...my heart goes out to you :heart:!!!!!!!!
Huge hugs. While your body seems so ready, the baby seems to be not. On a bright side it is good he is still baking! But so much pain - goodness, I'm not sure how you can bear it! Hope your lo decides to appear soon!
So sorry you're feeling so miserable. :comfort: Hoping your little boy arrives soon. :hugs:
Thinking of you! :hugs:
If one hour at a time is too much, then just focus on the next minute, the next task. Just breathe and know that you'll be ok and this will not last forever!
You're doing great!!!!!!
Originally Posted by Geneari
:comfort: You are an amazing mom Ashlee. Totally inspired by you. Really hoping your body gives you a break.