I think bmom had a baby Dec 2011! Her sister has a fb acct and has her privacy settings as public. She posted a pic of herself with bmom and their brother from Thanksgiving 2011. Bmom was obviously pg and then her sister posted a pic of a baby saying she's a new auntie...baby was born mid-Dec 2011.
In the Thanksgiving pic bmom looked fantastic! I was so happy to see a pic of her that wasn't a mug shot ♥. She looked healthy and like she was doing okay.
I want to do one-way communication so badly but dh is still opposed. I understand his concerns. It's hard though knowing that ds may have a little brother and not being able to be a part of their lives at all. I'll bring it up to dh again in the future but not right now...he was adamant about it around Christmas (I wanted to send a Christmas card with a pic of ds).
It was so encouraging though...I know looks can be deceiving but it must be a good sign that I haven't heard from dhs that she had another child come into state care. They said they'd contact me if it happened...I think I'll call them and ask :).
Really praying she has her life together...she's often on my heart ♥
You are such an amazing and thoughtful person Kelly. :wub: I do hope BMom has her life in order and is taking good care of herself and the child. It has to be so hard deciding where the boundaries should be when it comes to her. I hope someday it can become a safe and friendly relationship between everyone.
Hopefully she's doing better! Sounds promising!
I hope she got herself together.
I am sorry your DH is not onboard with contacting the birth mom. My DH is also not on board with contact, and worse...doesn't want to tell the kids how they came about. I think about it all the time, and bring it up to him every few months. I agreed with him at first, we used anonymous donors so I always thought why tell them if they can't ever know more about the donor anyway, but over the last couple of years I have started thinking not telling them could come back to bite us. I wish DH was more secure in this one area.
Sorry to ramble....
I do really hope that she has her life sorted out now. I am sure that your prayers are having an impact and hopefully some day there can be safe reconciliation.
Thanks ladies...I'm hopeful that it'll happen someday!
Katrina, (((hugs)))...I tried appealing to dh's practical engineer personality by bringing up bfamily's ongoing medical hx and how it would be good info to have (eg, the sister...ds' s aunt...has a trach tube, it would be good to know if there's a genetic issue) but he won't budge on it yet :conf:. Thinking of you...the to-tell-or-not-to-tell issue would be difficult :hugs:!
Praying the time will come eventually that you and dh will be on the same page. It's not a dirty secret and nothing dh has to be ashamed of...his kids aren't going to love him less or think less of him because of it. In fact it puts him on my list of one of the bravest people I know...it's a lot for a man to cope with, accept, and then to move forward with a donor, wow, he's a keeper :)
Thanks Momma...I agree with you, I hope both our hubby's comes around ;)
That's great it seems she has her life on track. One day DH may come around, just be careful it can be emotionally draining sometimes.