Ok, so I just got back from my ultrasound and shocked to hear I am expecting twins! I am slightly panicked, please please please some of you ladies with experience share your wisdom with me! I also have a 2 yr old and am working full time but plan on being a SAHM soon.
Firstly, congrats! :wub: Next, take a deep breath! :winks: Yes, it's gonna be hard, but it's such an amazing thing to have two babies at once.
My first piece of advice is to get lots of help, even before they are born. I carried my twins to 38w4d and by that point, I was huge and tired. It hurt to walk and so my MIL did all of my grocery shopping for me. After they were born, I also had tons of help. Two weeks of meals from church friends. My dad and step mom ran our household for about 3 weeks. They cooked, took care of my big kids, shopped, did laundry so that I could focus on the twins. And then my church set up weekly grocery shopping and housekeeping help until the girls were 12 weeks old. That stuff was invaluable. :)
My next bit of advice is to lower your expectations of yourself. If everyone is fed and clean then that is your "good day." Anything else accomplished is just icing. :) Boxed dinners, while not the most healthy, will get everyone fed.
The last big thing I can think of is about doctors. I don't know your OB or how you feel about him/her, but a good one is important. I had to talk to 3 practices before I found the one I liked. The one I went with didn't freak out about twins, and I so appreciated that. But because twins can be more risk, I'd make it a priority to go with someone you are totally comfortable with. :)
Thanks, I am trying to breathe at this point. I know this will be wonderful and overwhelming all at once and there are sooooo many questions running through my head that is spinning at this point. Is the multiples room pretty active or would I be better posting in New Moms?
Hi! Firts off, congrats!!! and second take a big breath like Sakura said! Twin while usually are a big suprise, also come with BIG rewards! I agree with making sure you start getting help lined up now. By 18 weeks I was as big with my twins as I was with my first and second at full term, and byt 20 weeks I couldn't reach the stove to cook, even if I had had the energy to do so. One thing I would definatly sugest is make sure you have plans in place incase you are put on bedrest or go into labor early. I hada family friend who had twins at 35 weeks (she was put on bedrest at31 weeks) tell me this, and I completly blew her off since I didn't have any problems with my first two pregnancies, and everything was going great with my twin pregnancy. Boy was that a mistake when I fell and went into labor at 31 weeks, and had nothing plannned yet as far as what to do with my older kids, and work... Hopefully you won't have to use those plans, but it would have been a lot less stressful on me the twins first couple days of life if I had made plans ahead of time. If you have any questions don't hesitate to ask us BTDT multiple mommies!
Congratulations!! My advice is always to look into a local multiples group. They can hook you up with great deals on "stuff" and provide support IRL. I hope you have a healthy, uneventful pregnancy. Sakura made a great point about talking to your OB about how they handle twin pregnancies. Their are a lot of different viewpoints and i think it's important to be on the same page as your dr. Our multiples group also has a couple LC's. If you are planning to nurse, getting practical info on nursing two before they arrive is a big step ahead. Good Luck!!
First, congratulations! I found out at my 13wk (which turned out to be 14wk) scan, too. It's shocking, isn't it? Get the book When You're Expecting Twins, Triplets, or Quads. I found it helpful in guaging my eating and weight gain (it was hard for me to gain as much weight as you should w/twins).
Get used to accepting help. I've found that with twins I'm much more likely to say yes when someone offers help. It makes a big difference, imo.
And try not to freak out. You'll get used to the idea over the next few months, and when they arrive, you'll figure it out. Do you have family nearby? Friends who can help? Is your older child in preschool? If not, you might want to look into that. Also, I found that right after the babies were born, it was really important to get DS as many out of the house playdates as possible. It helped him feel special and gave me time to figure stuff out. We're lucky to have a lot of good friends in our neighborhood who offered to take him for the afternoon most days. And I also had lots of toys and surprises hidden away to break out for him if he was getting particularly cabin feverish.
Also, I know not all babies are alike, and certainly not all sets of twins are alike, but I have not found that having two is twice as hard as having one. Yes, it's harder, but not as terribly hard as I feared it might be. And you know what? It's a lot of fun.
I'm in the thick of newborn twins and it is tough, but wonderful!
A everyone said get help! W had my mom here for 2 weeks and then she had to leave unexpectedly and since then DH and I have been on our own and it would be sooooo nice to have help from family or friends that are SAHM ( unfortunately my friends that are SAHM have little guys just like me). I am jointing the multiples group soon so that should help.
Also plan for the unexpected- I went on hospital Bedrest for a month and then a month at home! I delivered at 36w1d. Have everything ready early! We didn't and had to scramble. Also 2 swings have been a life saver along with 2 Boppy's and the breast friend twin pillow when I was breast feeding.
Gotta go-bath time!
Congratulations! All the others gave really great advice. My guy was two when we were pregnant with the trio and turned 3, 2 days after they were born. It was/is hard not having the energy to do all the things we normally did and now there's just not enough time. I try to make one day a week, even if it's just a few hours, where it's just the two of us. I also have him going to Mother's Day Out one day a week and if I'm lucky I get a day to myself and he's so excited to go play with other kids. I say that having three isn't much different than one, just more time consuming. Everything takes so much longer to do.
And they're awake....