Anyway, I hope this works as a strategy going forward. I mean, short of her ever apologizing and turning a new leaf, I think this is how it's going to be.
Hi, love. OK. First of all, thank you for coming out for this, even though I know you have a lot of reasons to not go tonight. We both do. I mainly just want my parents to get to see Bodhi one more time, and it helps eliminate that whole thing with them being caught in the middle of all of it.
I've adopted the belief that the best way to deal with <sister> - in order to not become part of the problem where my parents are concerned AND to keep our blood pressure down - is to learn how to be dismissive of her. If you can be relaxed in her presence, it means she hasn't gotten to you. Just because you are in in the same room as her doesn't mean you want to be her friend or trust her further than you can throw her or think she's any less of a weasel. And if it ever comes to the point where she needs us to trust her or do anything for her, that's the right place to draw the line. Not at sharing dinner with family.