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Oh yeah, I definitely noticed people becoming more distant once the secular room started getting going. Oh well... if you don't like me because I don't believe in god, then I don't like you for not liking me for that reason! Neener Neener! :P :laugh:
I confess the big project at work is updating the Christian Books section. The book manager came over to talk to me in the Cafe today on her lunch, and said
"S and I were just putting some books away, and there were two guys looking at the bibles. I looked at S and loudly said 'Why is it that the Atheist has to mess with the bibles??' "
She said the look on those guy's faces was priceless, and just her telling me about it made my day.
Oh yea...
I confess -- I found out today, that B was arrested the other night for the 3rd time since I left. That makes 5 times in the past year alone...
Everytime I start to feel bad or down about the divorce, he does something incredibly stupid that makes me realize how much better off I am without him!
Yes, you definitely are better off without him. :hugs:
Someone at work was asking me yesterday how long I was grief-stricken after breaking off my wedding with my fiance. I told her I kept learning more and more things about him that just reinforced what a good decision I'd made, and now I'm to the point where I just thank my lucky stars I didn't stay with him. I know it's not good for B to be getting arrested, but on the other hand, I totally understand how you feel!Quote:
Originally Posted by atenielle
YES! But unlike you, it bugs the crap out of me!Quote:
Originally Posted by shutterbird
I have a friend, well did...who was in our wedding as a bridesmaid. She made a complete ass of herself getting too drunk and then crying because she thought she ruined my day. Uhh, she didn't ruin my day, nothing was ruining that day, and I told her that while trying to keep her calm.
We talked a couple of times since and then her grandma and great grandma who both lived with her and her mom died, one shortly after another. She said she didn't want to talk to anyone about it at the time so I just sent her a text and told her if there was anything I could do, to please let me know and also to let me know when she felt like talking. I thought I was doing the right thing by giving her space and letting her come to me when the time was right for her...but I haven't talked to her since.
After a bit I tried contacting her, calling and calling over and over again and leaving messages. She has NEVER returned my calls. I even called every day for a week and told her if she didn't talk to me I wouldn't call again after the week was up. I have NO idea why the heck she just stopped talking to me. I still try from time to time and she still has the same number, I left her a message not too long ago telling her that if she never wanted to talk to me again she could at least tell me wtf I did to make her feel that way because I have absolutely no idea what it could be. I also told her I hoped that I would talk to her by the time my baby is born.
I should just stop trying but it's like "Dude, I didn't ask you to be in my wedding because I thought we were fly by night friends" and sometimes when I'm driving in my car, I just can't help but dial her number and see if she will answer...or if it's even still her number.
Oh yes, I've had that happen. It's so frustrating when you have no idea why.Quote:
Originally Posted by shutterbird
I'm sorry dear. Totally their loss. :hugs:
Mia also has very little hair, and I keep it short because it's so thin that it look weird long. I look forward to it finally thickening up.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lydia
I confess that I love my mother's comment on my hair "Oh My God! I would never have believed it! I like it but it just seems so wrong."
Umm...thanks? :laugh:
I feel sad for everyone who feels ignored or like they lost a friend. I had something similar happen and it really hurt. I still wonder what happened and why she just stopped being my friend. I try to chalk it up to our lives just changing and growing apart but then there is the small voice saying, "Why doesn't she like me?"
I confess that I had a great Friday night. The kids were settled in watching a movie with dbf so I drove over to my girlfriends house and drank wine with her and all of her hippy friends. They are so sweet and loved my stories about Savana and Kai. And I loved their homemade living room rugs and stories about working on the farm they all work on. It was really nice to meet new people and see an old friend. I woke up at 4am and drove home so I could be here when the kids woke up. I climbed into bed with Savana and she woke up and said, "I love it when you come back when I'm sleeping and surprise me." :wub:
I'm so glad I'm making myself get out and spend time with old, dear friends. It really lifts me. And it's worth being super tired today.
Glad you had fun Bridget.
I've always wanted a little farm.
On the whole friend thing - this may or may not apply, but I had a very close friend who all of a sudden I lost complete touch with. I tried to call her at one point and her number had changed, and I was totally taken aback because I had always thought we were good enough friends, that I would at least be someone in her phonebook that she would want to notify of a number/address change.
I let a couple more years go by, until finally I found myself really in need of the specific friendship I had lost with her. So I made an attempt to find her - and when I did, I was really surprised because she felt like I was the one who didn't want to continue a friendship. Once we got all that out of the way, and started talking again, we were pretty much able to pick up where we had left off, and to this day she is one of my closest confidants, and I love her like a sister.
As I said, I'm not sure that my experience applies, so take it or leave it. I just always remember that there are two sides to all friendships :)
Quote:
Originally Posted by bridgetwu75
That's great! Gives you more energy for the rest of the week. :)
Quote:
Originally Posted by midgeend
I've had a similar experience with one of my friends. For a while we were just on really different paths for a while, so it's understandable. But now that I'm moving back to LA, I'll be able to see her whenever I want. I'm kinda worried though, because we've been apart for so long. I hope it's not weird. :laugh:
And I've never had a person stop talking to me because of religious differences. The friend I was talking about is a Christian and that's cool with me. My beliefs are cool with her. And another good friend, I did the pictures for her daughter's baptism. She approached me like "I know you don't believe in this crap, but will you do the pics for me." :wub: I guess I'm just lucky that my friends understand. :dunno:
No certain family members, that's a different story....
Oh HECK yes. I have a friend like that, here. I have no idea what her problem is, but I'm done trying and it makes me sad. Like, if I have an issue with someone, I lay it out there to be resolved. I hate it when other people are passive aggressive and leave you wondering if you did something wrong or if they're just nutball. :eyebrow:Quote:
Originally Posted by shutterbird
I've felt that way about people too...and like you, I find I don't have the energy to chase them down and ask what happened. When I think in terms of myself, I figure I'm just too cold hearted because it doesn't seem to make me sad...but when I read your post, my first thought was that the friendship must not have been that great.Quote:
Originally Posted by shutterbird
I had a childhood friendship that lasted till our early 20's, then we drifted apart. For years I regretted that and was so excited this summer when I was able to locate her. We talked on the phone and it was tough...very forced. We decided to meet up with some other high school friends and the connection was just gone. I think sometimes people just change...no one is bad or good, just different.
I confess that I love seeing Stash & missychrissy posting again. :)
I confess yesterday afternoon we drove down this nice street and it was a warm afternoon, and the streets were packed with happy families walking around, eating ice cream, browsing through stores, etc. I suggested we stop and walk around there for a while instead of going to a playground, since we'd had three solid hours of running around in the morning. We each held hands with a child and strolled about leisurely, browsing in produce markets and antique stores. I was with Claire, and she was not fussing about holding my hand. She was excited and interested in everything. She was incredibly good in the antique store and only touched things I let her touch. She picked out some fruit and carried the bag. On the way back to the car, she was skipping to the song I was singing for her, and it was so nice. I realized that I very rarely have so much enjoyment hanging out with the twins. I like them, and I think they're incredible people, and some moments bring me aching joy, but I rarely can just relax and enjoy their company. I was a little sad to realize that, but any enjoyment I have is usually complicated by moderating spats, seizing opportunities to teach, redirecting, guarding against injury or property damage, etc. It's never relaxing, and yesterday was. Despite feeling a little guilty about my realization, it also gave me great hope that I would be able to feel like this more and more often, as they get older and require less nonstop intervention. (I'm sure it didn't hurt that the child care was 1:1.)
:wub:Quote:
Originally Posted by Lydia
What an awesome day.
Sounds like a great day, Lydia! Even with one child, it's hard for me to relax and just enjoy the moment sometimes. It's so nice to have one of those days.
Lydia, that sounds wonderful. And I know exactly what you mean.
double post
I confess that I feel like I did so much more planning and thinking things through with Savana and with Kai so much is happening by fluke. Like with the potty training, I started because of an unfortunate series of events that left me with only about 12 cloth diapers and I didn't want to buy more. Then last night when we got home from my parents we couldn't find the one and only pacifier we have left for him. It's been a little sad for him to go to bed but he's done it so I suppose it's time to be done with that. Everything's happening so fast!
I confess that today we went to a four year old's birthday party at the YMCA and the only drink option for kids was soda. Root beer and Squirt. I asked for water and the woman working gave me cups and directed me to the children's bathroom. While I was in there one of the ladies asked Savana THREE times if she wanted soda and Savana said no every time. I was so proud of her and really annoyed that the lady kept saying, "Are you sure? Don't you want something to drink?" Finally Savana told the woman she likes to drink water. :wub:
I was really surprised that everyone was letting their kids just have as much soda as they wanted, even very young children who must have been barely two years old, if that.
Yuck! Josh still hasn't had soda. Heck I still water down his juice by half or more. I wasn't allowed soda for a really long time. Then my mom started letting me split her Pepsi with her. I was probably 8 or 9 by that time.
Josh asked to wear a diaper tonight :( I don't have any more though. I hope this isn't a regression already.
I'm having a friend issue right now too. :( Back story is we met when we were 15 and she stayed with my family for 3 weeks one summer. It was an exchange thing through school and she is French. We got along GREAT. Next summer when we were 16, I went and stayed with her family. Also GREAT. When we were 19, she came back to my family for like almost 2 months. So much fun was had since we finally could go places being adults. My family even surprised her by driving to CA so we got to go see a ton of states, go to Vegas, SF, Lake Tahoe, Mt Rushmore. Of course we also always went to Chicago because it's not too far from my hometown. In those early years we had to mostly communicate via snailmail and would send packages and such. We would call a few times a year. In our 20's it became a lot more sporadic...not on my part but hers because her boyfriend wasn't really into English or American things and she was always so busy with school.
Ok so now we are 27 and she broke things off with him and suddenly we are chatting a lot again via email because she finally is connected. So she comes to stay with my family again for almost two months (she is a grade school teacher now so summers are off for her). I am now married but at that point only lived like 45 min from my parents so she stayed with them and with DH and I.
She calls my parents mum and dad and I think of her like a sister. My parents think of her as their French daughter.
Ok so after that visit, contact is great again for a while. Than she disappears again for almost a year. Turns out her dad died and they were close. Contact is good again for a few months, she disappears on me. Contact is resumed turns out she is pg (her new guy they are sort of married but not totally like we are here...but he likes English and I did talk to him a tiny bit via webcam at one point). Once again it's good for a few months but I heard nothing from October until Feb.
She just had a little boy like two weeks ago and has sent some pictures to my parents and I. He is really cute.
Ok but the problem is I do love her. But I'm so annoyed with her too. I don't need daily emails but a few times a month would be nice. That way I'm not thinking maybe someone died of swine flu.
I will not cut things off....it's been too many years.
But I'm so jealous of the baby (she got pg the very first month of trying!) and especially annoyed that MY parents are calling him their French grandson and grandbaby. And my mom wants to throw a baby shower with a small group of us that got to know her on the multiple visits here. She is trying to pin me down into a date when I can come down...I now live 5 hours from my parents. And I'm am so not into it and am trying to think of ways to not visit. If she had been good about keeping in contact, I would be more into a baby shower.
I have also told her that we would come out and visit them in Paris but ONLY if she kept in contact.
:wub:Quote:
Originally Posted by MammaMia
Lydia, you will get more of those moments as they grow up.
Bridget-you're an awesome Mom, and I think every one of us who has had more than one was more lax with each baby we had. Conner has practically raised himself :laugh: Ok, not that bad, but you kwim.
I confess I bought the funniest book at work the other day, and it reminds me of all you ladies... It's a mother's confession book!!
You know, one child or fifteen, I think it's hard to remember to relax and be present. I'm certainly not minimizing the work of caring for twins or more, but even with one child you have to remind yourself to back up, back off, take a deep breath and enjoy them. I do just that about 20 times a day. :P
I confess that my dad just sent me an email about my mom that is making me scared. She is going to start a clinical trial cancer treatment through the UW Madison. He pretty much said if this does not work that he's going to quit his job and she is going to quit treatment and they are just going to live until she's done living.
I don't want to lose my mom you guys. I am so not prepared. I need her. My kids need their grandma. They love her so much. I am nowhere near ready for this.
Hugs Bridget.
Oh Bridget ((hugs))
:hugs:Bridget