Secular Confessions

Oh, and no one dances by themselves at the Spoke! You are asked to dance by the men or you ask a man to dance if you are feeling especially frisky, but its all partner dancing all the time with no singles. Rarely you will see two women dancing together, but that's sort of a partner killer because that means that you are either a lesbian or dance-crazy rather than just out for a good time. I don't know if that makes sense. They rarely get out of line, but if you are dancing you are really halfway to sex, right? So a guy likes to feel like he might have a shot in real life (even if it would never ever in a million years happen). We go around in a clockwise motion, with freestyle partner dancing in the middle (tosses, spins, lindy-hop type stuff). Anyone who doesn't go counter-clockwise is politely but firmly bumped off the dance floor by the passing dancers. Old-school dance hall - one of the original honky-tonks from the 50's I think. Such a great place.

for all I cry about the cold, for some reason my feet don't seem to be susceptible to it at all. In fact, I often sleep huddled under two comforters and a blanket, but with my feet sticking out. If they get warm, I'm miserable. I almost never wear regular socks...mine are black knee highs essentially. If I was my 'sneaker socks' with sneakers and/or boots, I often end up with my feet so uncomfortably hot it makes me grouchy. :) So I'm sure the boots will be perfect. I'll likely slip and fall on my ass in them though :)

Maybe I'll buy me some after Christmas. I've tied up all my excess funds on the kids for this month.

You should share a picture of yours with us. I have a thing for cowboy boots!

Not even sure I have one! Maybe if I go out with my sister I will try to get a photo. I am the same about my feet - they get really hot and I always slip them out of the covers even if the rest of me is under the covers.

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Originally Posted by girlwonder

Oh, and no one dances by themselves at the Spoke! You are asked to dance by the men or you ask a man to dance if you are feeling especially frisky, but its all partner dancing all the time with no singles. Rarely you will see two women dancing together, but that's sort of a partner killer because that means that you are either a lesbian or dance-crazy rather than just out for a good time. I don't know if that makes sense. They rarely get out of line, but if you are dancing you are really halfway to sex, right? So a guy likes to feel like he might have a shot in real life (even if it would never ever in a million years happen). We go around in a clockwise motion, with freestyle partner dancing in the middle (tosses, spins, lindy-hop type stuff). Anyone who doesn't go counter-clockwise is politely but firmly bumped off the dance floor by the passing dancers. Old-school dance hall - one of the original honky-tonks from the 50's I think. Such a great place.

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Sounds like fun...actually, it sounds a lot like one of the places my father frequently played at. They like to refer to themselves as the "Opry Barn of the North" or something like that. The have a huge dance floor and lots of two-steppers going counter-clockwise around the outside. Line dancers on the left side of the floor, and the free-for-alls in the middle. I never danced on that floor alone, but often with a large group of women. Yours sounds much 'older-fashioned' than mine. Which could be fun, but not if you're stuck without a dance partner :(

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Originally Posted by girlwonder

Not even sure I have one! Maybe if I go out with my sister I will try to get a photo. I am the same about my feet - they get really hot and I always slip them out of the covers even if the rest of me is under the covers.

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:D What a nutty thing to have in common.

I was trying to look my 'true blue' honky-tonk up and I'm dismayed that they don't seem to have one pic of the dance floor anywhere on their site! They're lame. It's big. :D Well, for our area. Probably nothing compared to what they have in Texas.

http://www.cortlandmusicpark.com/Opry-Barn.html My uncle is on the Hall of Fame tab because he was inducted a couple years ago (that was the last time I was there actually :( ) but the photo is really small so you can't see him.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6.../AboutMe08.jpg

The only picture of me at the place....it's kinda sad because we were there nearly every weekend for many years. It was great fun. I'm a honky tonk angel of sorts. :)

and wow I had no idea that pic would be so huge. sorry!!!

I used to have an awesome pair of cowboy boots. They were brown leather with a 4 inch heel. I used to get quite a few comments from the men folk about how they looked great but they also would marvel at how I was walking in such tall heals. I got some new boots for Christmas but they are just black leather ones with a flat heel. They keep.my feet warm. I'm one of those people who always has hands and feet who are as cold as blocks of ice.

I don't mind the cold so much....really my winter coat is just a normal wool one. But my winter boots are super warm and have special heat reflecting stuff in them. My feet are very prone to cold. I almost always have socks on and I warm my fur lined slippers even in the summer.

Uggg need to do some cleaning so we can get our tree up. I would rather be making cookies or working on my xmas cards.

I am loving my kids' school more and more. One of the local science museums provided a science-museum-to-go event at their school last night, and even brought along a portable planetarium, which looked like a giant inflatable igloo. We bought dinner for $4 apiece there to raise money for the 5th grade camping trip and made alka seltzer rockets, tested our balance, made bracelets with 'space jewelry,' talked to astronauts, learned how balloons behaved in vacuums, did bean bag tosses at different planets in the solar system, and played with accelerometers. One of the scientists there asked if I was an engineer. It was really pleasant because I was there with just the twins and DH was home with S, per his request, and he put him to bed so he could read up on some car parts he ordered.

Today I worked on our Christmas card picture and didn't stress about getting it perfect so it's already ordered and on its way.

DH is working on his car. He's doing a bunch of stuff to it AND converting it so it will run on ethanol. The weather is miserable here so I think we're going to hang out inside all day. S is a huge grump since he woke up at 4 AM so I just essentially forced him into a nap and I think I'm going to play some board games with the twins instead of the cleaning I should probably be doing.

That's really neat L. How cool your dh is capable of converting your car to run on ethanol too.

Syd was just telling me about how her principal (or vice principal, not sure) will make students open their facebook on their phones so he can read them. It doesn't sound like it's only in response to some online bullying either. Two of her friends were in his office for something else. One was called down because she's having some personal problems (her parents are separating and fighting over her and her sibling for custody). The principal wanted her to talk about it but she didn't want to. He demanded her phone and yelled at her about some messages. I'm beyond ticked. I told her if he EVER asked for her phone, stuff it down her bra (thank you Jesi for that idea) and just say "Call my mom" No matter what he says, threatens, or anything that's all I want her to say. If he screams at her and won't stop, I told her she has my permission to get up and walk out of the school and come to my apartment or go to grandma's. Screaming at the kids seems to be something else he's known to do. I don't think we're going to make it through this year without me having a good go-round with him. I want to call and b1tch at him for what I've heard thus far, and Syd hasn't even been involved in any of it. Yet. He's the kind that tries to maintain order by being threatening and yelling a lot. That doesn't fly with me at all. And I'm not afraid to yell back. He'll be no match for me if he gets me ticked off.

We started talking about him and how he manages things because apparently there's a student that is threatening to come in and kill everyone. I'm pretty upset about that and asked Syd if she or her friends have spoken to anyone about it. Syd has two classes with him and both teachers tell the kids to just ignore him. When they insisted that he's being serious or that they're really afraid he's being serious, the teachers actually told the students to 'stop being so dramatic!' I'm dumbfounded. That's when I asked if any of them had tried talking to the principal.

When I complain about this school and their complete and utter lack of common sense, I'm not making it up. They're the biggest bunch of morons I've ever come across. Every year it's something. Now I'm not sure what to do because Syd hasn't had any personal interaction with this kid. I told her to just be nice to him and avoid him as much as she can, just in case. But I don't feel comfortable reaching out to the school. Not only would they not take it seriously (if you remember, they didn't take it seriously when those girls were telling Syd to go home and kill herself, and they acted like I had a lot of nerve to call them about it), but I'm afraid if the kid found out it was Syd's mom that called, that could put Syd at risk. He's most definitely talked about killing his peers and that scares me. I don't know what to do. :(

Chrissy, with all the shootings lately I might consider pulling her out until it blows over. Is there another option for you like an online school? That is not something to take lightly. I don't usually worry about stuff like that.

L, the science night sounds like so much fun.

Chrissy, can you make an anonymous report? Or let them know that you don't want your name and relationship used? Maybe you can get some feedback from the faculty saying that he's been assessed and that it was okay (some writers today talk about how some of the stories they wrote as teens would have gotten them expelled from school as 'immediate threats') or let them know that people are aware and interested and that they better start taking it more seriously. I can't imagine many schools would completely dismiss a potential school shooter without doing any investigation. I'm not absolutely sure from the last podcast I heard about it, but there has been a lot of analysis over the past decades on trying to prevent and maintain awareness and how to handle immediate danger, and I think schools are required to go to training now.

If all else fails, go to the press. You can be anonymous there, definitely, and they can put some pressure on the school.

It got to be about 3:30 today and the kids were completely shocked that we hadn't gone anywhere today, even though they'd been taking turns going out and helping DH work on the car, and it was raining, and we'd been playing games and stuff. DD said, "We haven't gone outside ALL day!" So we went out, but it took awhile after everyone got their shoes on after about 20 reminders and went to the bathroom after about 30 reminders, and DD fell asleep in the car even though it was only 10 minutes away, and then it started raining by the time we got to the playground. So most of us turned around and went home, although DH and Ro decided to walk home just to get some outside time. DD was so upset when we got home and she hadn't played outside. She claimed that it wasn't raining and she hadn't been asleep, but then could not explain what happened to half the occupants of the car.

Any ideas what we should do for our date morning tomorrow? 8 AM - 12 noon, rainy weather. Nothing interesting opens until 11.

Coffee shop to just relax and maybe read together? A breakfast place? Cute picture of the three! Oh I know...church! LOL


Chrissy what about just reporting to the police? The police would than go to the school and it's kind of hard for them to ignore the police. Talking like this kid is, is a threat.

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Originally Posted by 3andMe

(some writers today talk about how some of the stories they wrote as teens would have gotten them expelled from school as 'immediate threats')

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On this train of thought, there was a little boy at work the other day that really made me worry. I was trying to get a sample of his language so we were playing in the play kitchen area. To get him talking, I got out a stuffed bear and was feeding him. The little boy took out the little toy pizza and cooked it in the oven, then sliced it and put a piece on the plate and served it to the bear. Then he took the bear, put it in the oven, turned the dial up on the oven, and "cooked" the bear. He then took the bear out, set it on the table, got a knife and pretended to "carve" the bear into pieces. I just sat there in shock. We had just been playing / talking to / feeding that same bear so he was a "friend." Afterward I told my partner about it and she said it was just a boy thing, and she promised he wasn't going to grow up to be a psychopath. I honestly was wondering.

Have your boys done this? Is this normal?

I can tell you that S. would not develop an attachment to a toy that he just met at a random office like that, even if he had just been feeding it. Ro wouldn't have a sense of 'friendship' with it either, but wouldn't cook it unless for shock value, because he knows that is not normally done. DD would not cook it and cut it up and would be horrified if she saw it, both because of the rule-breaking aspect and because she would feel sorry for it. S in particular has not developed an attachment to any of his toys, no matter how much I have fostered it. Sometimes he seems to like them but when he is angry he says he doesn't like them, and he throws them and deliberately uses hurtful language.

I don't think it's just boys. DD has said plenty of macabre things, but she has a very developed sense of right and wrong and is scared of breaking rules unless it comes to things DH and I tell her not to do. I have totally dismissed the things they've said from time to time, just because kids say and do stuff and it doesn't do to make too much of it, but I remember thinking that if I didn't know them and I just heard it out of the blue it would give me the creeps. I'm trying to think of a good example, but I can't. DD is more socially aware, so she is actually more aware of how to hurt someone else. Like she told DS the other day, "I love you, but only a little tiny bit." Not true, but she was trying to hurt him, and she was successful. When they were younger, one of them told the other one that they could see their whole body becoming more invisible and just disappearing, or something like that. They're older and more sophisticated now, so I can't remember as many good examples, but S. could do things like that on a daily basis if he wasn't so sweet the other part of the time.

Do you remember how I didn't take the kids out and run them around today? Well, close to bedtime they were running around our tiny house and I kept telling them to slow down. I encouraged them to sit on the floor in a triangle and practice rolling a ball to each other because they were getting all riled up. They kept getting up and trying to run and I kept telling them to slow down, sit down, slooooowww down, and 3/5 of my family ended up with injuries tonight. DS leaped after the ball and slammed head-first into the metal grate on the floor, getting a huge goose-egg and an interesting bloody welt pattern in the middle of it. Right as his ice-pack was starting to warm up, DD was being instructed to slow down (again!!!!!) and she ran right into DH as he was telling her that, and bumped her forehead into his mouth, and his tooth rammed into her head. She's got a bitemark in her forehead. Luckily I had a second icepack. Then S. kept trying to run around and I practically had to sit on him because I was just picturing another injury. He was trying to shimmy out of my arms every time I picked him up. Tomorrow it's supposed to be pouring.

Well, sounds like you definitely need to take those kids out!

I know I shouldn't make too much of the bear thing, but as you said, it's my only experience with the child. Thanks for the input.

NY State has had an official 'zero tolerance' for bullying program in place for many years, but this school is absolutely resistant to acknowledging it exists, much less address it. One of the teachers that received a lifetime achievement award for being one of the best actually told me on the phone once that when my daughter was being singled out and bullied, it was usually an indication that there was something wrong at home. :rant: Then last year when the girls were telling Syd to go home and kill herself, someone in the superintendant's office said very sarcastically "There is absolutely NO BULLYING in this school!" She was adamant about it. They'd rather bury their heads in the sand than deal with it. They've had 5 students in 6 or 7 years commit suicide. But they deny there's a problem in their school. They will not take something like a kid threatening to kill his peers seriously. They just won't. It's my belief it's a liability issue for them. If they admit there was bullying and someone commits suicide, they don't want to be sued. The same with a school shooter...they don't want to acknowledge they know about this kid because if something happens, they don't want to be sued. I honestly believe they put that concern above and beyond the safety and wellbeing of their students. You should see their Facebook page...their "About" section is completely 100% legal mumbo-jumbo. Their alumni flew the last space shuttle mission as the commander...you'd think they'd have that on there. Nope. It's all legal "you can't sue us and here's why" :eyeroll:

I'm going to keep talking to Syd and some of her friends and see how serious they really think it is. I don't know the kid, nor his parents. I wish I did.

On a happy note, Rich, Syd, Jesi, Kaleb, Conner and I all went to my coworker Faye's house (the one I rave about being such an awesome human being). We had the best time! Syd asked if we could do that every weekend. We were there 7-11 and it felt like the time just flew right by. Rich and Mark (Faye's husband) sat in the mud room drinking beers and talking like long lost pals. Faye & I often said Rich & Mark were two peas in a pod and we were sure they'd get along. They did. It's so uncanny how similar Faye & I are (except she's nicer), how alike our husbands are, and how much our fathers had in common. Faye & I both like to have paths of space around all our food and will not eat anything that touches something else (like if two kernels of corn get in my mashed potatoes, I cannot eat them). Aside from the fact that she's short and I'm very tall, we're nearly identical in personality, preferences, work ethic and humor. And she's a fabulous person...inside and out.

I might hate this job like none other, but it's worth it to be there because I got to meet Faye. I simply adore her. :wub:

I'm posting something just because this room is lonely and I have a funny story to tell.

I was reading S. a bedtime story last night about the moon, and he said, "Oh, I've been there. I've been to the moon." I asked, "Reeeaallly?" and he replied, "Yes, it was right after I turned two years old." I said, "You have been to the moon. How did you get there?" He said, "In a rocket ship." I said, "I supposed you saw the Sea of Tranquility? How was that?" He said, "It was very big, and it took a long time to get there."

I told DH about this when I came out, and he said, "You should hear about the time he went to Antarctica. That was a great story!"

He's a little trip! Love it.

I love the stories little kids tell. Josh tells very believable stories about how he was a girl, and he lived a long time ago when humans first existed. If I wasn't such a skeptic about past lives I'd totally buy it.

Aww that is cute.

trimmed two of Cosmos nails yesterday that we realized were curling in (she has very hairy feet and needs a trim). Ended up with bleeders but had the stuff on hand to fix that. that stuff is great. Clotted it immediately and it has lidocaine to numb and I think something to reduce infection.

However I think that we are going to bring her in to the vet in the next week or so because I think that she has hypothyroidism. Her coat is dull and not growing thick and fast like it used to, skin seems dry, and she seems more tired than she used to be.

That is a really cute story, L! Travis has said some pretty funny stuff lately. The other day he was in the bathroom and I heard him say to DH, "daddy, I do not like the smell of Tommy Smith's* bum. It really stinks!" (He goes to school with kids who have just started school at 3.5 years old and some of them still poo in their pants every now and then.) I picked him up from school the other day and he was telling me that he'd had a conversation with a girl in the school bathrooms. I asked him what they talked about it and he said that he couldn't remember. I was like, OK, and then he said, "Well, you know that Holly is just ridiculous, right?" I burst out laughing because I am sure she is ridiculous to him.

Ugh, just got back from the doctors; Travis has strep throat. He's in good spirits, though. I just hope Cash doesn't get it as well. He's doing well getting over his pox.


*I changed the boy's name to protect him from ever being accused of being a smelly bum.

Lol, that was nice of you Ash. Would suck if someone googled his name in a few years and this thread came up.

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Originally Posted by Bridget

Lol, that was nice of you Ash. Would suck if someone googled his name in a few years and this thread came up.

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I pity anyone that google searches purple toilet seat. :P

That was too cute L!

I'm beat. Work is killing me. Hoping for an interview. :P Nothing much to add.

Ash, I can't believe that you didn't change Holly's name to protect her from finding out that she's ridiculous. :laugh:

:laugh: Poor Holly. Hope she doesn't find out until after the holidays.

So. Kai really wants to "see what this McDonalds thing is all about". Savana, ever the supportive sister, is on board. *Sigh. He asked me if he just ate it once if it would hurt him and of course I told him no way it wouldn't hurt him but I hope they hate it! I'm thinking we might have to go with the ice cream. Speaking of that, I am giving Kai dairy in small amounts. I've been agonzing over it but we cut out the dairy for weeks and it's going to sound crazy but he became very consitpated and nothing else changed. I'm so confused about it all at this point.
So back to the McDonalds thing. I know a little bit won't hurt but we don't eat McDonalds for other reasons outside of health. Clearcutting rainforests is one of the ones the kids and I have discussed quite a bit since by brother was in Brazil years ago and was shown by locals the McDonalds owned areas. On that note, however, I don't want to be a dictator. He was so sweet about asking to check it out and I can't blame them since they're everywhere.

It really is better that they're introduced to it now because if they're denied it for years and then they're teenagers and their friends are doing it they might overdo it. I hope they decide they don't like it and stay with that.

Too funny about your kids and Mickey D's Bridget! I thougth Savana had gone in kindergarten with her class, I remember you speaking of a field trip to McDonald's lol at that one! Maybe it was someone else though and my memory is failing.

Ironically, Elle was going on and on today about McDonald's. She asked for McDonald's for just me and her. I thought it was sweet but told her not today. She said "how about after school for dinner!" She is really into wanting to go to McDonald's and "the movies" lately. I think she and her little friends must talk about burgers and movies all the time.

I am almost done with my Christmas shopping and am spending way too much money. Since we are going to OH for Christmas this year and since my brother lost his job, I am getting my nephews some things because they don't have any clothes that fit and their shoes, according to the 15 year old "look like they can talk." Meaning they had the floppy thing going on. So I bought them some new shoes and sent them already since I don't want them at school looking poor. One can be poor but not look poor - this was something my mom always said lol! My mom also does't make much money right now and was feel bad about not being able to get the boys shoes and clothes for Christmas. One of my nephews wears a uniform to school and only has one shirt. They have to be bought at the school so I will have to contact his school to see if they will let me buy them online or over the phone some way. The oldest of my nephews (my favorite - I know I am a horrible aunt for having a favorite lol) goes to a very prestigious all boys private school. They have school choice in OH (one of the reasons why I am trying to get back up that way) and because he is poor, he doesn't have to pay anything to go to his school except $500 for the whole year. The regular cost of his school is about $20K. I also just found out that they have not paid his $500 fees for the year for this school year, nor last year so I have to contact them about paying this for my nephew so he can continue at his school. I actually did send money to my brother in the summer for school fees, half of them $250, but I should have sent it to the school directly so now I will have to contact his school to see how to do this. I think my brother paid $100 on it but nothing else. I probably should be mad at him but I'm not. I just worry about my sweet nephews. They are really good boys and very smart. The 2nd oldest one is our family genius as he tested with an IQ of 160! He told me how boring his school is. He goes to an advanced, selective enrollment school, but it is a newer school and I don't think they are challenging him according to his description. It really irks me that my brother and the boys' mother don't realize and appreciate what nice kids they have. The oldest is 15 and is very respectful, rarely talks back, and is not in any trouble and isn't even chasing after any girls (much to his dismay lol, he realizes if he goes to a school with girls that he would "go buck wild" lol). Nice parents would love my nephews and I just feel bad for them. I wish I could take them and let them come and live with me.

Erin