Net???

[newmom84]

I want so desperately for this room to be active! I need some single mommas to talk to!

So what about a NET? Who's with me?

[kadas33]

:hi: I'm not quite single yet, but will be hopefully sooner rather than later. Just waiting for my attorney's okay to move out of the marital home. I was also a single mom raising my dd (who's 15) when she was an infant and toddler. Although dh and I were sorta together at that time, I was still basically a single mother with her.

[ushxcp]

I'll join....I'm seperated right now. Decided to divorce in June, live seperately right now, but we just need to do something towards divorce. All is very amicable.

Excited to get to know some of you single ladies

[Thaby]

I want to be a single mom and do all on my own...Just don't have the guts (or reasonable reason) to do so. Don't mind if I hang out here? :winks:

[Thaby]

What's NET btw?

[twinmom34]

NET= never ending thread...

Mind if I hang here? Anyone that reads my posts can see the direction of my marriage. AND I was a single mother to my boys before I got married in 2006 for 17 years.

[newmom84]

Yay!!! :hooray:

We need some BTDT moms in here so I think everyone should be welcome!!!


How are you and your kiddos doing?

Those of you dealing with divorce or separation how is working out the custody going?

[ushxcp]

Kids seem to be doing fine. Obviously the littler one doesn't know what's going on but my 4 year old is very aware that mommy and daddy don't live together anymore. The lease on our house is through December, so for now my husband and I just switch while the boys always stay there. So I'm at the house Monday-Thursday nights, and then husband stays there Friday-Sunday nights. Working very well so far. In January I'm going to move in with my parents until the end of the school year, I'm a teacher, and I think he's going to his parents' as well.

All of our bank accounts and stuff are still together because this is very friendly. Kinda feels like a business transaction.

[twinmom34]

"ushxcp" I sure hope mine goes so well! I have not made a definative decision as to when and what I am going to do. Currently I have given it a year to change for the better. So, I do have a question...you have a 4 year old, how is he emotionally? My girls are 4 and I am sooooo fearfull they will be devastated!


My kids are a wide range of ages, 23 to 4. My 23 year old is a sweet heart so, I try to keep all talk quiet around him. My 21 y/o and my husband have not spoken for almost a year so, he knows a little of the drama (but he also still lives at home, so he lives the drama). My house is in an uproar at any given moment depending on my husbands mood/decisions for the moment :ohno: I just can't take it anymore.

[ushxcp]

I'm Ashley btw:hi:. He's doing really well. I mean I don't know about any of this but he seems fine. We do talk a lot about us still loving each other but having to live apart, and that if he ever feels sad it's ok to cry. He doesn't really ever though. He did make one comment about wanting 4 nights with daddy and only 3 with mommy, ouch, but that's cause daddy gives him cookies and crap and mommy makes him brush his teeth...lol

[twinmom34]

Ashely, thanks for the into :laugh:... my husband and I separated for a week in February. My girls seemed to be ok with the whole situation but of course when they were in trouble or didn't get what they felt they needed from momma they would cry for daddy. I wish ours could be as friendly as yours sounds like it is! Makes me wonder why the two of you are choosing to live apart if you can get along so well????? Or is it that the two of you are getting along because you do live apart?


I have decided I really have no desire to "date" once we part ways. I am sooooo over and past that! I feel like I have tried for the last 20 years to be a good woman to someone and get crapped on in the process.

[Thaby]

wrong thread

[newmom84]

Ashley it really sounds like yall have things figured out. Its so great that you have your parents to live with.
What grade do you teach?

Dee Dee is it so much fun having twins? Im sure the baby stage is hard but I would think at 4 it would be a blast.

Me and baby daddy have actually been talking this week and civil at that. We have plans to meet next weekend so he can see Eli (for the first time) and we can work out what we want to do. He keeps going back and forth on what kind of involvement he wants so I hope we can talk face to face and hammer out a plan.

[ushxcp]

We're so friendly for the kids. It's not their fault we're divorcing, and we both play an active role in their lives so we mine as well get along while doing it.

I am the reason we are getting divorced. We've been together 10 years, married 7, and I haven't really been happy most of that time. He's a great guy but he doesn't possess a lot of traits I want in a spouse. Basically I should have never gotten married to him, but I was young and stupid and thought it was what I was "supposed" to do in the time line of my life. I cheated, and he found out about a year and a half ago. We tried to work on things but I realized I just didn't want to because there were obvious reasons why I cheated. So, he moved past the anger of me cheating and that's why I think we can be friendly now.

*Whew*

I teach 6th, 7th, and 8th grade. 6th math, and the rest I teach the English language learners. It is sure a challenge to do this all day and then come home and take care of my boys.

What do you all do?

[kadas33]

Wow, Ashley. My story is so similar to yours in that I'm the reason we are divorcing. Been together for 16 years, married for almost 9. Looking back, I too realized that he's not the right spouse for me either. He thinks I'm cheating on him because of all of the positive changes I've implemented in my life in the past year or so, but that's just not the case. I think he's just grasping at straws because he even asked me if 'I've changed my orientation'. :laugh:

We are both still living in the marital home for now. We told our daughter who's 15 and she seems to be coping okay with the it. We have basically been living separate lives for several years anyway so it was no surprise to her. Since we are still living together, we have decided to not tell our son yet as it will be hard enough for him to process and even more so since nothing has really changed as far as he can tell.

[twinmom34]

Amanda, twins are HARD! I am not sure if it is because they are girls, if it is b/c there are 2 of them or if it is b/c I am 20 years older now but they. wear. me. out!!!! I had my boys while I was in highschool and raised them as a single parent until they were 15& 17. It was 100x easier raising them than it has been with the girls!


Ashley, I am a nurse. I went to LVN school straight out of highschool and then went on to RN school within a year from graduating from LVN school. I have been a nurse for 20 years and I love it! It gives me an income to where I feel self-sufficient and has awesome hours in my current job. My patients are wonderful, caring individuals and I can't imagine any other type of job.


My husband is pretty selfish and is what I believe to be an alcoholic. I have tried for 5 years now to get him to get with the program and this year I finally decided I was fed up! I am happier now knowing I will probably be divorcing within the year. I don't feel the stress of each and every arguement we have. I don't let the small stuff he does bother me anymore. He is very volatile and has extreme ups/downs. Just like tonight he was screaming at one of the twins for crying in the shower :pokey:. Yea, scream at her, that will make her quit crying. I don't know, I just don't like a lot of things about him anymore. I often ask myself if he quit drinking and told me he was ready to get on board if I would still want to divorce???? Sadly enough I think I would!

[Thaby]

Please ladies I need moral support....http://www.americanpregnancy.org/forums/showthread.php?t=328211 :(

[Thaby]

Right now I'm thinking about getting a job, rent a storage unit, buy a piece of furniture off of CL in every pay check and put some money aside to get my won place. My only fear is doing all this and when me and DH get divorce I'll have to divide everything with him...SO I wonder if I should worry about getting a place and things after.
What do you think?

[kadas33]

Thaby--I'm going to read your other thread and PM. :hugs:

[newmom84]

Kadas, what is your name if you dont mind me asking? And how old is your son?

I am an Office Manager. I like my job. Its a lot of data entry which is right up my alley. Plus they are real understanding if I have to take off short notice.

:laugh: sorry Dee Dee about the running you ragged. I'm sure I will understand a little bit about that when I'm chasing a 4 year old around.

[kadas33]

Kadas, what is your name if you dont mind me asking? And how old is your son?


I'm Karen. My son will be 5 on Christmas Eve and my daughter turned 15 in March.

[twinmom34]

Good to know your name Karen :) I think it helps to be on a closer level :)


Thaby, :hugs: I can only imagine how tough your life is right now.


Girls, my house is a tough house! I have a 21 y/o son that lives at home and the twins. They are my life and my core! I also have a 23 y/o son that I love just as much, he just doesn't live it at home so, it doesn't feel like my life is so intertwined with his.... But, my issue is my family! Like over the last hour it has just been me and the 3 kids. We have had a great dinner and everyone is in the living room having a blast. This is only b/c my husband is not home. If he is at home, my 21 y/o is in his room with the door shut and if we (me or the girls) want to interact with him it is always in his room. It is such a sad situation :ohno:


Enough whining...what are you all doing this weekend? We are going to Oklahoma City Zoo and staying at a hotel to let the girls have one last summer hoorah!

[ushxcp]

Thaby, I think of you often and hope you have the strength to do whatever it is you decide to do.

Dee Dee, your house does sound tough.

This weekend I actually did a few things. Since my husband has the boys from Friday to Monday, we're going to shift a day soon so he'll get one weekend day, but I got to do happy hour and a movie on Friday. Then Saturday I did breakfast with my best friend and her family and then we went to a tattoo convention where she decided to get a tattoo. We had to go back for her appointment, and I had to leave before she was done because I had tickets to see Steve-O do some stand-up last night. He was so funny, and then after the show he mad the point to take a picture with every person who wanted one. It's now my new FB profile pic. I think I'll make today a lazy day before work tomorrow.

[twinmom34]

We are home. We had a really good time. The zoo was hot but we rode the tram most of the time. After the zoo we went to the river walk and had lunch. Went swimming and did lots of shopping. Overall, we had a really good time which was nice!

[kadas33]

Dee Dee--sounds like it was a great weekend for everyone.

My weekend was a total bust. Dh and I are switching primary custody every other week at this point, but since we still live together it's all so odd. It was his weekend with the kids so I felt like I couldn't really just chill at home but didn't have anything to do either so basically I wasted a lot of time just bumming around. Took an impromptu road trip about 2 hours south to eat at an awesome restaurant just to kill time and get away. Went by myself which was kinda lonely.

[newmom84]

Ashley and Dee Dee sounds like yall had a great weekend!
Dee Dee are yall as hot as we are here in Texas?

Karen sorry about the lonely weekend. I'm sure it will get better. What did you have at the restaurant?

I had a low key weekend as well. Not much you can do with a 3 month old anyway. :laugh: Got some reading and cleaning done.



So glad we have a three day weekend coming up! Anybody doing anything fun for the holiday?

[twinmom34]

Amanda, I know I asked this before but, where in Texas do you live? Yes, we are hotter than he!! here! I.can.not.take.it.anymore!!!!! My yard is dead and my trees/shrubs are dying. We have had more than 80 days above 100 degrees this summer!


Ashley! It sounds like you had a really good weekend, way to go!


Karen, I think an impromptu roadtrip would be fun, especially to try out a new restaurant...but I see where it could be lonely :( I have told a couple of my friends that if I do end up with the big D in 2012 I plan to take a solo Alaskan cruise to "find myself again". I was really happy and content as a single mother before I got married and hope I will find peace one way or another in the near future.


As far as Labor day weekend plans go...I am a real party girl...I am going to work a 12 hour shift in the ER so I can get the time & a half holiday pay :winks: I have a goal to pay off my son's car by 12-31-11 so I work a lot of overtime and holidays in an attempt to reach my goal. I think I will be safer if I end up alone if I have his car paid off.

[newmom84]

Dee Dee I live in Austin. I can not wait for some cooler weather. I want to be able to take my LO outside.

Getting the car paid off is a great goal. I just bought a new car about a month ago so I have a ways to go. Are the twins in daycare or do they go to a preschool? I don't know ages of when they start stuff like that.

[twinmom34]

The twins go to daycare but once they turn 4 they have a "school like cirriculum". Here pre-K is only for low income, military dependents or kids who speak English as a second language. They will start kindergarten in 2012 which is waaayyyy too soon for me, although daycare for twins is a fortune! What about little man? Where does he go while you work?


I have a conference in Austin next April, I may try to do a meet-up! We live about 4 hours North of you.

[ushxcp]

Dee Dee is it your birthday today?? If it is...Happy Birthday!!! If not, APA is just plain wrong and I'm going to complain...lol

[twinmom34]

Party girl...yep that is me! My birthday was Wednesday. I am now celebrating my last year in the 30's and I am going to have psyc myself up for the big 40!

[twinmom34]

Here I am replying all by myself again...girls where are ya'll? Man it is hard as heck to keep this room active! I plan to go to a movie today by myself. I feel like I am still trying to "find myself" or more like get at peace with myself and I really wanted to see The Help so I decided I would go by myself and I hope it isn't too lonesome.

[ushxcp]

Hey there. I saw that movie and loved it. I also read the book. I think they did a really good job adapting it to the screen. Did you like it?

I had a really stressful week at work. So this weekend I've really been enjoying my time to myself. Happy hour on Friday, went to a water park yesterday, taking the boys 2 hours up north tonight to stay the night and go to the county fair tomorrow. Driving up with a friend and her 9 and 6 year old little sisters. Tonight is technically my husband's night with the boys but he doesn't mind me taking them and him getting a weekend night off since neither of us have to work tomorrow.

I did have an issue with husband earlier in the week though. I coach girls and boys middle school soccer for the school I work at. I had try-outs this week, so I asked him if he could pick the boys up and take them home to feed them and get them ready for bed because night I have soccer I'm later and I don't want to leave them at my parents' house too long. So he picked them up around 5:30. I was done at 6:30, so I called him at 6:30 to see what they were up to and he was just feeding them right then so I told him I was going to go get something to eat and then I had to run and get some laundry detergent. All was fine. I went to eat at a real restaurant with my friend and apparently this is where I went wrong. I was done eating and checking out at the store at 8 and he starts sending me texts asking where I was. I said I was on my way home and he totally blew up and said I was taking advantage of him. I didn't think taking care of his own kids was a chore. And then it's not like he doesn't want to because he said he'd love to have them 7 days a week it's just the fact that I went to eat. I made sure I called him.

It ended with him apologizing because he called me a few mean names, and he said he's just tired and stressed. Sorry for the novel, but that's what has been going on with me.

[twinmom34]

Ashley, The men in our life really can not stand it when we do something for ourselves. It was the "real restaurant" that put him over the edge, I am sure.


As for The Help, it was sold out :ohno: but I was really looking forward to a movie and some time away so I went to see the next movie that was showing around the same time. I went out on a limb and decided I would just go for it with whatever movie I came across, "Crazy Stupid Love" and I must say I LOVED IT!!!!! I am so glad I went to see it, there were times I felt a little self-concious b/c the movie was soooo funny it kept making me laugh out loud and I felt a little weird. Other than that, it was awesome!!!!!!!!!!! Have fun at the fair!

[ushxcp]

I LOVED that movie too. It was so funny I agree. The fair was very fun. Very dirty, a little hot, but nowhere near the 110 in Phoenix. Back to work tomorrow...ick

[newmom84]

Sorry I have been out of the loop. Last week at work was real busy!
I have been wanting to see Crazy Stupid Love! I just love Steve Carrell and love looking at Ryan Gosling. :laugh:

Well the first meet up with baby daddy happened on Sunday and it went real well. He was real good with Elijah and even got him to smile a couple of times. We decided to just take baby steps on this co-parenting thing. I'm really optimistic that we can make this work. :)

[kadas33]

That's great news Amanda. I hope he continues towards a path of peaceful co-parenting.

I don't usually do movies, but you girls have me wanting to see that Crazy Stupid Love now. I had heard good things about it before as well. Will have to add it to my movie list.

Did everyone have a good weekend? I had my son this weekend and it felt like we were going non-stop. A friend from highschool was in town so it was great catching up with her and her family.

[twinmom34]

My weekend was home insanity as usual but I still give it at least a B+:laugh: especially since I got to see a movie!


Amanda, glad to see him coming around, I hope he continues to work to be a good daddy!


The county fair is coming here next week and I plan on taking the girls. Ashley made me laugh when she said it was hot and dirty b/c I asked DS2 if he wanted to go with us & his response was "Mom the fair is nasty and it is too hot outside" :laugh:

[kadas33]

The county fair is coming here next week and I plan on taking the girls. Ashley made me laugh when she said it was hot and dirty b/c I asked DS2 if he wanted to go with us & his response was "Mom the fair is nasty and it is too hot outside" :laugh:

That would be my response as well. I used to like going to them as a child, not so much as an adult. :laugh:

[newmom84]

The fair may be hot and nasty but you cant beat a funnel cake!!! :laugh::P

[kadas33]

The fair may be hot and nasty but you cant beat a funnel cake!!! :laugh::P

See, I don't even like funnel cake. I know, I'm a strange one. I got sick after eating one at a carnival about 10 years ago and haven't touched one since. In fact, a friend and I were at the zoo this weekend and my friend mentioned a funnel cake and ds didn't know what he was talking about, :laugh:

[ushxcp]

mmmmm...funnel cake. My issue with the fair too is how much everything costs! When you are little you have it made without knowing how much stuff is costing. The prices are ridiculous!

[twinmom34]

Funnel cake...yum yum! I can't wait! I am actually on weight watchers for 3 months but I plan to make room for that funnel cake!


The daycare had free tickets for admission & they have a wrist band night which will make it cheaper (notice I don't say cheap).


Ohhhhh how I love thee funnel cake!

[newmom84]

I decided that I'm going to breast feed until 6 months and then wean. I feel like that is an admirable amount of time and by then he should be eating solids so he wont need as much milk. I am so sick of pumping and dealing with my supply issues! :crazy::pokey: And I am sooo ready to start losing this baby weight.

Dee Dee how is the weight watchers going for you? I may have to look into it...

[LaBellaVita]

:hi: I'll jump in but I don't get much APA time anymore especially with my new little guy keeping me beyond busy!

[twinmom34]

Weight watchers is going well. I am doing it online due to cost & time. It has always been my easiest way to lose weight especially since I love to eat :laugh:

[newmom84]

Hi LaBellaVita! :hi: What is your first name? And how old is your baby?

Having Monday off really makes the week fly! So glad it is already Thursday!

[newmom84]

Weight watchers is going well. I am doing it online due to cost & time. It has always been my easiest way to lose weight especially since I love to eat :laugh:

This is sooo me! I love my sweets!

[kadas33]

:hi: I'll jump in but I don't get much APA time anymore especially with my new little guy keeping me beyond busy!

How are you doing? I think about you and your little ones often. :hugs:

[twinmom34]

Girls I worked Wednesday from 8am to 1pm, came home and slept 2 hours then worked 7pm to 6am this morning, came home and slept 2 hours, had to take the twins to the doctor and am now trying to take a nap "with" them and all they are doing is crying because their routine is messed up and they are over tired :headbang::headbang::headbang::headbang: God grant us sleep please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[newmom84]

Oh my goodness Dee Dee! Hope you are able to get some sleep soon.

[LaBellaVita]

:hi: My name is Kelsi. I'm 21, and I have 3 amazing little ones. 1 girl and 2 boys! 5, 3 and 2 months! I'm not a single mom by choice, most of APA knows the story, you can PM me if you want.

Kadas33- I'm doing pretty well, just got moved into our new house. Our old house was just starting to drive me nuts, too many memories, it was getting to the point where I could not even be there- it was honestly almost annoying (that makes no sense, I know!). Trying to figure out a somewhat normal routine but things just are busy busy anymore. Thank you for thinking of us:hugs:!

[twinmom34]

:hi: I'll jump in but I don't get much APA time anymore especially with my new little guy keeping me beyond busy!



Sleep deprivation made me miss you post :hi: I have really missed you! I think of you often and wonder how you are doing??? Glad to see you come in here, I hope now that the baby is a little older you can come by more often :hugs:! You have amazing strength! And Kelsi I didn't know you were only 21, you have been through a lot to be so young! My DS2 is your same age and I could not imagine him being able to handle it! But then again I was 25 when his father was murdered so I wasn't much older! You hang in there...

[LaBellaVita]

Sleep deprivation made me miss you post :hi: I have really missed you! I think of you often and wonder how you are doing??? Glad to see you come in here, I hope now that the baby is a little older you can come by more often :hugs:! You have amazing strength! And Kelsi I didn't know you were only 21, you have been through a lot to be so young! My DS2 is your same age and I could not imagine him being able to handle it! But then again I was 25 when his father was murdered so I wasn't much older! You hang in there...

Thank you :wub:! I have been through a ton for my age-honestly more than what most people will go through in an entire lifetime, it baffles me how I function like a normal person, since pregnant with DD (5) it has honestly been one thing after another..but I can say, I now realize how incredibly strong and independent I am :).

Hope everyone has a wonderful Friday!

[twinmom34]

Good Friday to all from here also! It will be a "better" Friday for us since it is my payday :silly:

[kadas33]

Girls I worked Wednesday from 8am to 1pm, came home and slept 2 hours then worked 7pm to 6am this morning, came home and slept 2 hours, had to take the twins to the doctor and am now trying to take a nap "with" them and all they are doing is crying because their routine is messed up and they are over tired :headbang::headbang::headbang::headbang: God grant us sleep please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yikes! I sure hope you were able to catch at least a few winks here and there. I don't know how you function on that little sleep.



Kadas33- I'm doing pretty well, just got moved into our new house. Our old house was just starting to drive me nuts, too many memories, it was getting to the point where I could not even be there- it was honestly almost annoying (that makes no sense, I know!). Trying to figure out a somewhat normal routine but things just are busy busy anymore. Thank you for thinking of us:hugs:!

I'm glad to hear you are getting settled in a new house. I can only imagine how living in the old house would drive you nuts. You are absolutely amazing, Kelsi. Such a strong, independent, wonderful mother.

[newmom84]

Happy Friday everybody!!!!

Kelsi your little one is just a little younger than my little man. Is he a good sleeper for you? Eli WAS sleeping thru the night but here lately wakes up at least twice. :headbang: Its easy to get him back down but I sure am missing the long stretches we were having.

Dee Dee is this weekend fair weekend??? :silly:

Ashley what are your plans for the weekend? You always have such fun weekends, I have to live vicariously through you. :laugh:

Kathy do you have the kiddos this weekend?

[kadas33]

I don't have a whole lot planned for this weekend. It's dh's weekend with the kids so I'm sure I'll lots of free time on my hands to fill. I've got a few friends on standby who I can call to hang out with if I find myself with nothing to do. I try to stay away from the house when it's his weekend with the kids but with no family that's really local (both my parents live over an hour away) it's hard sometimes to fill my time.

On a positive note, I heard back from my attorney and hopefully I'll be meeting with her in the next 2 weeks to sign my petition for divorce to get the ball rolling. :hooray: I can't wait. We are all eager to get it done and over with so we can both move forward with our separate lives.

[newmom84]

Kathy I hope you find something fun to do!

[ushxcp]

I'm supposed to be going to the ASU football game tonight. Tomorrow I'm helping sign in girls at my school who are trying out for cheerleading in the morning. In the afternoon my best friend's sister is throwing my best friend a "puppy shower." My best friend doesn't really want to have kids and has decided to get a puppy so her sister figures it will be her only chance to throw her any type of shower. She's going all out in the pink department just as if she was having a baby girl. Kinda funny. My friend knows she's getting the puppy but the shower is a surprise. Then we might go out Saturday night :)

[kadas33]

The puppy shower sounds like a great idea! I'm a huge animal person though, so I may be biased.

Speaking of puppies, I let my dd get one this past weekend. Just what we need in the middle of a divorce is another mouth to feed and animal to home. Dd went camping with her horse and some friends. Apparently this older puppy showed up at the campsite and hung around them all weekend. The campground owners told dd and the people she was camping with that they would shoot the dog if she was still there on Monday evening. :shocker: I couldn't let the poor puppy get shot so I had dd drag her home with her. I didn't make any guarantees as to whether we'd keep her or not, but I did guarantee if we didn't keep her we would take her to a no-kill shelter. She seems like she was a pet because she knows basic commands and overall is very well behaved. Luckily she gets along with our lab and they enjoy playing with one another.

[twinmom34]

Amanda, the fair starts Monday, I think Tuesday & Wednesday will be armband night which is A LOT cheaper so I will be taking the girls Tuesday. The weekend at the fair is a little wild with the older kids, so we will stay away then.


I think Ashley wins as having the best weekend plans so far!


And no, Karen, I don't think I will be catching up on sleep any time soon. I worked today my regular job 8a-4p. The ER sent a desperate mass text the needed help tonight and since I am workin 7p-7a tomorrow night I "ignored" the text. 4 hours later they sent another text saying no response from earlier text and they are now willing to pay time and a half on top of the time and a half you would be earning if you worked. So, for triple pay I couldn't say no...I did say I would only work 8 hours tonight instead of the 12 they are needing.

[LaBellaVita]

Good Morning :hi:!

I think weekends never cease to slow down! I had to run back to the old house to finish getting a few random things and the power company did not turn the power off yet, even though they were supposed to on, oh, the 29th :headbang:! I did get all the last few things out and gone, I'm so glad to be done with that house, but I will seriously miss it in alot of ways! Laundry, cooking, nursing--the usual here :wub:

[kadas33]

Yikes Dee Dee. You are one busy working mamma but I wouldn't be able to pass up triple time either.

Kelsi-The weekends always do manage to fly by at lightening speed, usually without much to show for it. Sounds like you got to spend lots of time with your little ones.

I had an okay weekend. Met a guy friend for lunch on Saturday and ran into one of dh's cousins and her boyfriend. Of course when he found out on Sunday he immediately assumed that the guy is my boyfriend and I'm sleeping with the guy. :eyeroll: Love how I can't even meet up with a guy friend for lunch without the accusations flying. It's not like there was any PDA or anything, just a guy and a gal grabbing lunch. Sunday was chill. Took the dog to the dog park and then grabbed a table on the patio at a local pub and had some dinner while listening to a live band.

The biggest adjustment for me so far is dealing with the loneliness when dh has the kids. I think it will be a bit better when I have my own place so I won't feel like I need to be out and about the whole week and I'll be able to kick back and relax at home. But with us still living together, I don't really have a place of my own where I can escape to. I'm sleeping in the not so hospitable basement, not a good place for relaxing. I don't really have any local family either, so it's not like I can just go hang out at their house. Hopefully I'll be able to move out soon and start my new life.

[newmom84]

Karen I hope you are able to find something great! Im excited for you on your new start. Feeling uncomfortable in your own home has to be so stressful. :hugs:

[ushxcp]

Karen - I was just looking back at posts, so I could find your real name, and our sons are almost exactly the same age. My son will be 5 on 12/21. Anyway, I hope you find a great place soon. I love my time alone, even if it is at my parents house. It is nice having family near by.

I'm having a bit of a blah week at work. On Sunday afternoon I got a call that one of our teachers died on Saturday unexpectedly. She teaches 7th/8th grade math, so while I was dealing with the pain Monday morning my little 6th graders who didn't even know who she was were less than sympathetic to what the rest of the school was going through. Tough way to start a week.

[twinmom34]

I'm having a bit of a blah week at work. On Sunday afternoon I got a call that one of our teachers died on Saturday unexpectedly. She teaches 7th/8th grade math, so while I was dealing with the pain Monday morning my little 6th graders who didn't even know who she was were less than sympathetic to what the rest of the school was going through. Tough way to start a week.


:hugs:

[newmom84]

That's horrible Ashley. :hugs: Hope the week gets better.

[ushxcp]

Thanks ladies. Service is today. Seeing all of these former students who she had an impact on come back is really hard. Especially when these high school boys come crying with flowers :(

[ushxcp]

wow, best post ever!!

[twinmom34]

That is my secret admirer! I will be sending you girls a pm soon!

[kadas33]

That is my secret admirer! I will be sending you girls a pm soon!

:laugh: Tell him/her to introduce themselves better next time.

[twinmom34]

:laugh: Tell him/her to introduce themselves better next time.


:laugh: awww man! The mods took down my admirer's post before I had the opportunity to translate it to you all :P

[newmom84]

aaawww man I missed out on the fun!
How is everyone this fine Monday?

[ushxcp]

I'm doing well. Saw Our Idiot Brother last night. I really liked it. I really love Paul Rudd.

When we had school picture day I had my parents bring my younger son in to get his picture taken since I am horrible at getting professional pics done, and we got the pics back today. He wouldn't smile in the picture but he is so handsome.

I'm ready for some Monday night football tonight! How is everyone else?

[kadas33]

I had a crazy busy weekend. Saturday the ranch that my dd belongs too walked in a local parade. The girls rode their horses and the parents passed out informational fliers. Hoping we get some new members as the ranch is about underwater at this point. :ohno: It was a long, stressful time but then again I don't do well around horses when stuff goes wrong, I freak out. The horses were having a hard time getting traction on the parking lot at our staging area and we had several slipping around. Thankfully all the horses were okay and no one got hurt.

I spent the day yesterday cleaning out ds room and tending to the house which I haven't been all that concerned about lately. I also managed to sneak into work for a few hours while dh took ds to a birthday party so I could get caught up on some work that I was behind on.

I'm also looking forward to MNF. Go Rams!!

[newmom84]

My weekend was low key, nothing too exciting.

I love spending two whole days with my son on the weekends but i HATE mondays because I miss him something fierce all day. Just one and a half more hours and I get to rush home to him.

Ive already decided that I have a stomach bug coming on and its going to hit on Friday morning around 8. :winks::cabbage:

Ashley I love Paul Rudd too! He is so funny no matter what he is in.

Karen, what does it mean to belong to a ranch???

[kadas33]

Amanda - Love your planned illness. Whatever it takes, right?

The ranch is a non-profit organization which used to be a girl scout troop until the GS decided horses are too much of a liability. It's open to girls 10-18 and they come out every Saturday and work with their horse (either their privately owned horse or their assigned troop owned horse). They learn about horse care in addition to getting to ride. It's set up with the older girls teaching the younger ones. Our monthly dues are relatively cheap ($100/month for a private horse and $85/month for troop horse) but it's expected that the parents will be heavily involved in the care and upkeep of the ranch. We have a caretaker who lives on premises and feeds the horses Sunday-Friday and she gets to take Saturday off as the girls are responsible for their horses that day. It really is a great organization but it sucks the life out of you.

[twinmom34]

You all know how wonderful :eyeroll: my weekend was but, today was good. My husband has basketball all night so it is just me and the girls. Also, the best part of our weekend was getting an inch of rain :hooray:. I know an inch sounds like nothing but we are 20 inches behind in rain and have only rec'd 5 inches of rain all year!!!


Karen, the horse ranch sounds really neat. I wish we had something like that.


Ashley, I have thought about seeing Our Idiot Brother but kind of avoid "brotherly" movies b/c I am not sure I will ever get over my little brother's death and it has been 7 years. Does it have anything you think would touch the "I miss my brother emotions"?


Amanda, I totally get the hatred on Monday mornings b/c I too know I have to leave my kiddos to go work. There are many days I think I need a "hang with the girls" day :winks:

[kadas33]

I met with my attorney yesterday and she officially filed my petition for divorce. :hooray: Now the process is officially underway. Hoping it's quick and easy.

[newmom84]

Thats great Karen! So what are your next steps after the divorce is final? I know you said you were going to get a new place.

[ushxcp]

Dee Dee - yes I think it would touch on the missing your brother emotions. I'm sorry to hear about you losing your brother. It comes off as a funny movie in the previews but it is rather serious in the whole family dynamic.

Karen - that must be exciting to know it has been filed. We haven't even done anything in regards to that, but we aren't in any big hurry either. Just sorta living our lives. The thought of actually filing and making things final makes me really sad.

[kadas33]

It is a sad time, yet happy at the same time. I'm eager (as is he) to get things finalized and 'move on' with our new lives. I hope to get my own place as soon as we get a judge's okay. Things aren't bad living with dh, but there's still that awkwardness that comes with two people who are divorcing living together. I'd much prefer that dh not know my comings and goings when it's my week without the kids and vice versa.

[twinmom34]

Ashley, thanks for the movie advice...I guess I will skip it. I sooooo miss my brother and miss him even more during this tumultuous time in my life. I want to go see the help, I work this weekend so I think I will try to go see it the following weekend.



Karen & Ashley, I can see the sadness of the step of actually filing but I can also see where it would be somewhat of a weight lifted off my shoulders.


One of my greatest fears in life is to be a failure...I think I have known for well over 2 years my marriage is over, I just haven't wanted to accept it b/c I feel like I have failed :ohno: After this weekend I KNOW it is over. So, now my next fear is filing and all the people in my city being able to read about it in the local paper b/c all suits filed are listed daily in the newspaper. Just what I want the whole city to know :(

[kadas33]

One of my greatest fears in life is to be a failure...I think I have known for well over 2 years my marriage is over, I just haven't wanted to accept it b/c I feel like I have failed :ohno: After this weekend I KNOW it is over. So, now my next fear is filing and all the people in my city being able to read about it in the local paper b/c all suits filed are listed daily in the newspaper. Just what I want the whole city to know :(

:hugs: I can absolutely see why you would think this. I have found it hard to 'justify' to people why I'm leaving my 'good' marriage, as if I need to justify it to anyone. Society tends to want marriages to stay together, regardless of whether either or both spouses are happy, unless there is domestic violence or alcohol/drug abuse.

I tend to see the situation the other way around. I think we are failing ourselves and our children if we continue to stay in a failing marriage where we are unhappy. I would much rather my kids see me happy and alone than be unhappy and still married to their father. Everyone deserves to be happy and when the unhappy days start outnumbering the happy days, it's time to reassess the situation and see if changes need to be made.

As far as what other people think (including dh), I've somehow managed to let go about worrying about what they think. True, I'd much rather set them straight and know the truth instead of conjuring up their own realities. However, I've come to the realization that I could talk until I was blue in the face but I'm not going to be able to change their preconceived notions so it's not worth my effort or time. Dh has accused me of some things which are definitely not true. I've told him his wrong, but I don't even bother to go into defense mode anymore as it's not going to change what he thinks. I'm definitely learning to abide by the serenity prayer to accept the things I cannot change, have the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. It really has made a world of difference for me.

[twinmom34]

I think we are failing ourselves and our children if we continue to stay in a failing marriage where we are unhappy. I would much rather my kids see me happy and alone than be unhappy and still married to their father. Everyone deserves to be happy and when the unhappy days start outnumbering the happy days, it's time to reassess the situation and see if changes need to be made..


Amen sister! And that is why I :wub: you! You actually made me chuckle while reading your post b/c you DEFINATELY have the right attitude. I whine all the time that I wish I still had my mother to talk to and you once again let me know she is there in spirit with your Serenity Prayer, she was a huge advocate of it. Thank you for reminding me, I need to post that on my fridge!

[kadas33]

Amen sister! And that is why I :wub: you! You actually made me chuckle while reading your post b/c you DEFINATELY have the right attitude. I whine all the time that I wish I still had my mother to talk to and you once again let me know she is there in spirit with your Serenity Prayer, she was a huge advocate of it. Thank you for reminding me, I need to post that on my fridge!

:wub: Awe, you warmed my heart. It's taken me over a year of intense soul searching to get to this point but I'm so glad I'm here.

[ushxcp]

Exactly Karen, exactly. Took the words right out of my mouth

[twinmom34]

I feel like I am making progress at my house girls! I don't feel like I "need" the assistance of my husband anymore and feel like I can take a day to myself without feeling guilty. It is kind of liberating to start doing some things on your own!


The irony of my situation is I was a single mom to my boys until they were 15 & 17. I was always surrounded by friends who wanted to find a mate or were lonely etc... I was forever telling them they needed to find happiness within themselves and worry about the man aspect later, feel good about being you and then you will feel better everyday. I need to start looking at that face in the mirror!

[kadas33]

Yay, Dee Dee. :hooray: I really noticed a significant change in my attitude and self esteem when I started making myself a priority. I joined a weight loss challenge at my local YMCA. Through it not only did I lose weight and get more fit, I also gained confidence and met some new friends. It was SO hard for me to let go of all the household details and take time out for myself, but it was the first step towards my path to independence.

[twinmom34]

The extreme highs and lows of this house are what I have to get away from! As you can see the sheer happiness I was feeling earlier. Well, now my husband is home and I just told the girls we are going to the park with their brother when he gets home. That jerk told me I wasn't allowed to take them with me and he would "let us all know when he gets here". WTF is wrong with this man???? I really, really try to wait to get my crap in order but I just don't think I will be able to do it!!!!!! I can not allow my kids to live in a house where they are used like pawns to be mean to me! What kind of father does that?????

[kadas33]

:hugs: That's just not right, he's being an a$$, that's for sure. I don't know that there is ever a 'right' time or a 'better' time to do it, it's always going to be a hard road either way.

[newmom84]

:hugs: That's just not right, he's being an a$$, that's for sure. I don't know that there is ever a 'right' time or a 'better' time to do it, it's always going to be a hard road either way.

Dee Dee I know I am not in this position and have no room to talk but its like Karen says, youre just going to have to do it. Its going to be hard either way.
I hope you can get a game plan soon. :hugs:

[kadas33]

How was everyone's weekend? Anyone do anything fun and exciting? This was my weekend w/o my kids. I met a few friends at the Melting Pot for dinner and drinks on Friday night, that was a lot of fun. I hung out with an old friend on Saturday. Sunday was my dad's birthday so I spent most of the day with my family. Dh was nice and brought the kids over to my dad's for cake and ice cream. Overall, it was a really nice weekend and dh and I got along well.

[newmom84]

That sounds like a great weekend! Meeting up with friends for a night out sounds like so much fun. I will be so ready to get out and be social once DS gets old enough to leave with a sitter.

Eli had his second meetup with his daddy. It went well. Baby daddy is learning how to figure out what Eli needs. He even fell asleep in his arms. :wub: I wish we lived closer so they could see each other more often. Maybe one day....

[kadas33]

I remember those days just yearning for adult interaction oh too well. Especially when you are a single mom and have no relief. So glad to hear of the continued process with Eli's dad. Let's hope he continues to have a positive relationship with him. And kudos to you for making sure Eli has an opportunity to know his dad.

[twinmom34]

Karen, my weekend was fine. I had a good time with my kiddos! I worked Saturday night and it was busy so time went by fast. My last hour was with a very confused pt who said some hilarious things. We have a doctor with a potty mouth so I will tell you one exceprt from our convo that made us all laugh! His desk was just across from the patient's room so he heard it all!

Patient: What's your name? What's your name? What's your name?

Me: Dee Dee

Pt: I need a hug.

Me: *ignore that comment*

Pt: I need a fu**ing hug Dee Dee! I need a fu**ing hug Dee Dee! I need a fu**ing hug Dee Dee! I need a fu**ing hug Dee Dee! I need a fu**ing hug Dee Dee! I need a fu**ing hug Dee! I need a fu**ing hug Dee Dee!

Doctor: Dee Dee would you please give the man a fu**ing hug?


And we all screamed laughing! Poor confused man with OCD...if hugging him woulda made him quit, believe me I woulda hugged him!

[twinmom34]

Amanda, I am proud of you for getting your son involved with his dad :wub: that is sweet of you!

[ushxcp]

Amanda, that's good to hear that the meeting went well.

Dee Dee, that story is hilarious.

Karen, glad you had a good weekend.

My week has been pretty busy with soccer and such. I am coaching the girls soccer team right now and we are doing pretty well. We have won 4 games and lost 1. I have 17 girls on the team, but after midterms came out I had 6 girls who couldn't play because they had F's. On days I have games I usually don't pick up the boys until 8 which is bedtime, so sometimes it feels like I barely see them. Luckily the season is almost over, and I think we have a really good chance of winning the district championship if I can get those girls eligible to play.

[twinmom34]

Ashley, way to go with soccer! I raised 2 basketball playing boys so I know how important district championships are. Each state is different but, here in Texas after district championships are the playoffs with a chance of winning a state title. Is that the case also in your city/state? Are the playoffs in your future? I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you.


Here at my house some of my plans came through nicely this week which is a HUGE help! My Kenedee was very, very sick in May with Pyelonephritis so she has me walking on eggshells when it comes to ber bladder. She complained for 2 days about her lower belly and although the nurse in me would have said it is this vicious stomach virus that has been going around without worry I took her to the doctor today to check her out and make sure she had no bladder problems. :hooray:Her urinalysis came out clean which was a huge relief (makes her sound like a kiddo with a drug problem :winks:). I told her doctor I will gladly pay $25 every 3 months to know she isn't having any bladder problems :laugh:.


I was just thinking last night while working in the ER that I sure wish all of us here lived closer so we could have a meet-up with our little ones. So, girls if ya'll are ever in Texas be sure to holler at me :laugh:!

[newmom84]

Dee Dee I think I am losing my mind because I swore you were in Oklahoma. Im in Texas, I work in Austin but actually live about an hour north. Where are you?

[twinmom34]

Wichita Falls which is only 20 minutes from the Texas/Oklahoma border :laugh:. I have a conference next April in Austin, I will be without the kids but I will definately holler at you! I also need to look at my map/schedule, my son plays college basketball and I will be going to all but 3 of his out of town games this year, I will have to see if any are near you. What city do you actually live in?

[kadas33]

I'm up in Saint Louis, but one of my dearest friends lived in Austin and is planning on moving back in the somewhat near future. She up and left Austin to move in with her fiance in LA but that relationship went south (thank goodness) and now she's wanting to move back to Austin where most of her friends are. I'm sure I'll take several road trips down to visit her when she does move back. I'd love to meet up with you girls when that happens. Maybe I can take a route that will take me by Dee Dee's place too.

[twinmom34]

Ok totally random but...today the girls were outside playing and I was in the house reading the newspaper. They come in to tell me there is a big bug bothering them. I go out there, I don't really see anything, go back in the house. I am sitting in the recliner and something keeps bothering me on the back. I keep wiggling in the chair to get my back comfortable and get up to help Kenedee do something. I go back to the recliner and there is a....







FREAKING WASP in the recliner! OMG! That is what was bothering my back???? How in the world did I not get stung???? Then I did what any girl would do...spazzed and screamed! That does me no good except to get two girls at the back door looking at their crazy mother. :laugh: but in the end it died by blunt phone book force and died a slimy death!


Ok, there is your OMG and laugh for the day, hope you all are having a great weekend!

[kadas33]

Yikes Dee Dee. So glad you didn't get stung, those wasp stings hurt like crazy.

How's everyone's weekend going? I won't go into details but Friday night I got burned (emotionally speaking) so bad. I have never been so humiliated and disrespected in my life before. I'm amazed at the dignity and grace with which I handled the situation but it still sucks. :ohno:

[twinmom34]

Karen, I am sorry you had a tough Friday night :ohno:. Whatever happened it sounds like you handled it well and a big :hugs:to you for having to go through it. I hope the rest of your weekend goes well.


My weekend has been great! I worked 14 hours Friday (I think I work more these days to avoid my husband) and he was gone Saturday so me, the girls, my younger son and his gf had a really good day hanging outside mostly doing yard work. The girls were really good and we had a nice dinner at the house together. We all love chicken alfredo but my husband doesn't like pasta so he acts like an asshat when we have ANY type of pasta.


We put together some fall decorations, decorated some pumpkins, mowed the yard and planted petunias. Sounds like work but it was a nice time and makes my house feel homey again!


All you other single mommas I hope you are having a great time!

[newmom84]

Karen Im sorry for the crappy Friday.
if it has anything to do with you ex, here is a :pokey:, just for him.

Dee Dee your weekend sounds so nice. I love crafting and working outside. Arent these cooler temps so nice?

I live in a small town just north of Georgetown, right of I35. If any of you are ever my way definitely hit me up. I would love to hang out.

I had another low key weekend. I did get to go to a scentsy party. Just because it was on my neighbors porch and I was able to check on Eli like every 5 minutes. :laugh: But it was nice to have some adult interaction.

[twinmom34]

Whoa Amanda! Is that a new pic of Eli or has my head been in the sand? He is looking soooo big!

[newmom84]

I actually need to update it, that's been a while. I cant believe he is going to be 4 months next week!

Dee Dee, Ashley and Karen do you have recent pics of your kiddos?

[ushxcp]

I'm so bad about adding new pictures. I'll have to work on that soon.

[twinmom34]

Well I remember seeing a much younger picture but I have a lot going on in my life :crazy:, regardless, that is a really cute pic of Eli!


I need to put up some pics (I haven't in the past because my husband didn't want me to *pssshh to him*) but also, I have no idea how to do it. I don't even know how to change my ticker at the bottom. The girls turned 4 May 24th and I still haven't changed it :laugh:.

[kadas33]

I deleted my ticker because I couldn't figure out how to change it. :pokey: And my pic definitely needs to be updated since that was taken about 3 years ago. I'll get to it...someday.

[newmom84]

Karen how are you doing? I noticed in another thread you were having a rough week. Just wanted to make sure you were doing okay. :hugs:

Thank you Dee Dee.
Are your twins identical?

[twinmom34]

No they are fraternal. They look a lot alike if I put their hair in a ponytail but are very different with their features. Chyree has always been 3# lighter and 3" shorter since they were about 2. It is kind of ironic that this difference has been there as a constant for 2 years now.


I will start with the disclaimer...I am not obese...I am 5'8" & weigh 169#


My husband made the mistake of telling me when the girls were still infants that Kenedee is "thick" like her momma & Chyree has a small bone structure like her daddy (which us girls call petite). Yes, it is true, but I DO NOT call myself "thick" :laugh:. So there are a lot of differences between the two.

While I was pg my greatest fear (besides unhealthy babies) was that I would not be able to tell them apart. Chyree was born with a head full of hair and Kenedee was born bald. Chyree still has WAY more hair than her sister but Kenedee's hair is WAY more managable!

[kadas33]

Thanks girls, for your concern. It's been quite a roller coaster of a week, beginning last Friday. I'm hoping the brunt of the chaos and emotional train wreck is over now. Hoping for a much better week next week.

Anyone have plans for this weekend? I'm going to a 'prom' tonight. :laugh: It's actually a moving party that takes place on our mass transit lightrail system. It's the forth year for it, but I've never been before. The premise is that adults get dressed up in formal/prom attire. We start at one station and take the train to the different stations for different parties. They crown a prom king and queen then we head back to a hotel bar for drinks and dancing. They are expecting 400-500 people so I imagine it's gonna be total chaos but tons of fun. I picked up a prom dress from Goodwill last night for $15. I'll have to post a picture from tonight if I can remember. I'm going with a friend and her friends and they are much younger than I (I'm 35 and they are mid-20s). I'm going to be the old person hanging out with the youngins.

I have my court ordered parenting class on Saturday morning, will be glad to have that part of the divorce behind me. Not much else planned. Hoping to move all of my clothing and personal belongings out of the master bedroom and into the space where I've been staying downstairs just so I have my own space and no need to go into the master bedroom anymore. Did I mention how eager I am to have this all done and over with?

[twinmom34]

Interesting party theme! Sounds like it would be a lot of fun though!


My plans for the weekend are same boring ones I do just about every other weekend...working in the ER Saturday night!


Tried to have dinner out with the family but...starts out this morning my husband asked me if I wanted to go eat with the kids tonight...I will give it a try although the last time we went to eat was a complete and total disaster. I get home, invite DS21 (they don't talk but they havent talked in a year now) and go into the living room and my husband proceeds to tell me he doesn't really want to go if DS21 is going :shocker:! WTF is wrong with that man? I have heard a small minority of women who say your husband should come before your kids but I must say, MY kids will always come FIRST! Needless to say, I invited him to stay home. I seriously think he does sh!t at times just to p!ss me off!


Way back in November 2010 when they had their falling out, DS21 offered to move out and stay away to prevent any discord. I told him then and there, he will always be my son and I will always be his mother; it is highly unlikely that Carl and I will always be husband and wife. It gets closer to that reality every day!

[kadas33]

Dee Dee - Your dh is a piece of work. I can't believe that he'd purposely exclude your ds, what kind of man does that? And then for him to expect you to choose one or the other. :ohno: I'm sorry he's such a PITA.

The prom was a blast. Got a prom dress from goodwill and got all dressed up. Nothing like a bunch of peeps parading through the streets dressed in formal attire being lead by a drum line. :laugh: Went with a good friend and her BFF, they were great company. Will definitely do it again next year!

[newmom84]

Karen, that party sounds like a blast! What color was your dress?
How did your class go? Sounds way boring. :laugh:

Dee Dee, I've been sitting here trying to think of what to say and I just don't. I hate that you and your kids are going through this. I totally agree about your kids being first and you are such a good mom because you don't let them doubt that for a minute. And honestly I am glad that your son is still staying with you since your DH is unstable.

Ashley, how was your weekend?

My baby is 4 months old today. :wub: Time is flying by!

[kadas33]

Amanda - It is so cliche, but time really does fly by. How was your weekend? Did you do anything exciting?

My dress was bright pink with a somewhat sheer/sparkly black over it so it looked burgundy, so cute especially for $15. I only have one pic from the night and I don't look so great, but I'll see if I can post it anyway. Just don't laugh at me, :laugh:.

The court ordered parenting class was actually super informative. Not so much on the how to co-parent part, but we spent the first half talking about the divorce process and the emotions/feelings/stages that you go through. I was such a welcome relief learning that I'm not totally losing my mind. They gave us a very informative booklet too. I'll scan and share with anyone who's contemplating divorce or going through the process if you are interested. Just PM me.

[ushxcp]

That adult prom sounds so fun! I went to Oktoberfest on Saturday night and went bowling on Sunday. I bowled a turkey, that's right, 3 strikes in a row!

So I have a situation I would like your ladies' opinions on. I'm terrible at getting professional pictures done, and it really is true that the second child gets the crap end of the stick when it comes to pictures, for me at least. DS#2 has never had professional pictures taken besides when I bring him in to my school on picture day and sit him there really quick to get one taken. Anyway, we had decided to do an outdoor family photoshoot for his first birthday which was May 7th. Well, May 7th came and he wasn't walking yet so we decided to wait until he was walking in hopes of getting better pictures, more action shots.

Things fell apart between DH and I on June 4th. This photoshoot never took place. I asked DH if he would be willing to still do it and he said that that's what he was going to get me for Christmas. Ok, so I have a willing dad/still technically husband. Would it be weird to get a family picture taken?? My friend thinks this is the most absurd thing she has ever heard. I told her that we would have already had it done anyway but we were just waiting for him to walk, but things just fell apart before we could. She says, yeah it fell apart and you can't go back. But why? He's willing, I'm willing, and I want the memories for our boys. She says they aren't real memories though. I argue that we will still be a part of our childrens' and each others lives the rest of our life so why does it matter.

So, what do you think? Am I being crazy for thinking it's ok to take pictures together??

[kadas33]

Sounds like you had a great weekend. And bowling a turkey, congrats. :hooray:

I think it's a great idea. Regardless of whether you guys are technically married or not, you are still the kids' parents and always will be. You and dh don't have to be lovey dovey in the pics. I think it's awesome that he's still willing to do the pics and I would jump at the chance.

[twinmom34]

Karen, It sounds like you are a fun person to be around! You are always doing something and it sounds like you have fun doing it!
I would love a copy of the handbook they gave you if you could scan one to me please. Do you need me to pm you my email or what would be best?

Ashley, I think of the family photo shoot as a “gift” to your sons. Although your family isn’t together anymore, he did have it together at one time and I personally think it would be nice to have that as a memory for him. Now…if it was next year at this time, I would hesitate to do it. That would be a little weird for me.
And bowling a turkey…I am jealous! I cannot even bowl a single strike much less 3 in a row!

Amanda, eat up those baby moments! I so wish I would be able to experience them again although I know I never will. Eli is such a cutie I bet he is a sweetie!

Girls, in my eyes my husband is a POS and I can’t believe I am in the place I am in today. Please have no doubts that I do not have a master plan that will be carried out before the first quarter of 2012 is over. There are just several things that I must get in place first. He sooooo infuriates me at times I almost lose control but I suck it up and deal with it because I know there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

I just hope I am not a irritant to you girls (like nails on a chalkboard), I just need somewhere to talk about what is happening in my life and I don’t know where else to go….I do thank you all for giving me a shoulder to lean/cry on a regular basis!

And here I will make my confession, in order to keep up with all that I needed to reply to here, I opened a word document and replied as I came accross each reply in here :laugh: I'm a nerd aren't I :laugh:!


The girls and I are going to a fall festival in Rowlet this weekend that I invited my husband NOT to go to and he happily obliged :hooray:! I am really looking forward to a low stress weekend.

[kadas33]

I try to make the most of my weekends w/o the kids. I figure I need to get out and have some fun but more importantly build a support structure around me to help me through this. Dh has a very large, local family so he has lots of support. Unfortunately most of my friends live in other states so my local support base is quite limited.

PM me your email address and I'll get it scanned (hopefully today) and emailed to you. I found the part about the stages and emotions of divorce that the adults go through to be so enlightening. There is also a section on how the kids react to divorce based up on their ages. The facilitator reiterated that it's not the divorce necessarily that impacts the kids, it's how the parents cope and co-parent, which I guess could be a good thing or a bad thing depending on your circumstances.

Dee Dee, don't beat yourself up for ending up in the situation you are in. I would be more concerned if you were contempt with it and not looking to change things. Remember, the only person you can control is you. You cannot control dh's behavior, only the way you react to it. Dh pissed me off last night and as hard as it was, I sucked it up and didn't say anything to him. Unfortunately we have to take the high road for the sake of the kids.

You are in no way an irritant. If you are, then I am even more so. That's exactly why this forum exists, for women in similar situations to provide support to one another. I truly enjoy the friendships I've made on APA. I only wish we all lived closer so we could get together in person and provided the much needed support to one another.

Hope you have a great time at the fall festival this weekend. I'm thrilled that your dh decided to not go, it will make it such a more pleasant experience.

[newmom84]

Ashley, I agree with the other ladies, that I think you should go ahead with the family photos. Dee Dee couldn't have said it better when she said its a gift to your sons. You and DH will always be their family and I am sure they will look back and cherish those photos. I think its very big and mature of both of you to want to do that for your boys. And like Karen says you don't have to be lovey dovey. :)

Dee Dee, don't ever for a second think that you don't belong in here. I am never a good one for advice but you definitely know that I support you. I know you are going through a tumultuous time right now, but I am so excited for you in the new year. I know that its not going to be puppies and rainbows by any means but I know that you will move toward being a happier you.

Karen, you impress me so much on how you are handling everything. I know I wasn't married to baby daddy but I very much want to do well at this co-parenting thing and you inspire me to rise above the petty things.

So on to a lighter subject, :laugh:, are yall going to be dressing up your kiddos for Halloween? I have yet to get a costume for Eli. I really want him to be a bumble bee, (I have a thing for bees) but I am waiting until next payday to go look for something. We are going to go trick or treating with my sister's kids. Eli won't actually get candy but I think he will enjoy being out with the big kids. He gets very excited when there is a lot going on. :laugh:

[kadas33]

Amanda, you should most definitely dress Eli up for Halloween, it's his first one after all. I hope you share pics of him all dressed up with us. And dress him like you want when he's young. When he gets older there's no way he'd go for being a bumblebee. :laugh:

I'm having a rotten, no-good day today. Couldn't find my keys this morning and just down in the dumps today over lots of things that are out of my control. Trying my best to let it go since I have no control, but it still hurts. Hopefully as the day goes on my mood will improve. I hate days like this.

[twinmom34]

I now see some update Eli pics and he issssss handsome!


My day sucked to start with and remained a sucky work day. So, when I got home I was exhausted! I started the morning by sticking not 1 but all 5 fingers through various areas of an entire LARGE diet dr pepper as soon as I pulled up at work which went all over my white polo work shirt and my rental (thank you God for letting it be the rental :laugh:) car! Disaster is all I can say! :headbang:


I was able to hire someone to make my son's cake for his birthday the 19th. I am afraid you ladies will think I am evil but...sometimes I can't help it! He is going to be 23 and can be sooooo serious. I think he needs to lighten up. He has been scared of Chucky since he was in elementary school and HATES if you turn on Child's Play if he is even in the house which makes us all laugh. So, here is the cake I am having made: http://geekcrafts.com/childs-play-chucky-cake/ he is finally old enough to be able to share in the humor of it. We got his windows tinted on his car today and I am sure he will be thrilled!


My girls will be MSU cheerleaders for Halloween. My son plays for MSU and the other son's gf is a MSU cheerleader and they soooo want an outfit so I figured it would serve dual purposes. They can wear it at Halloween and wear it to basketball games. The past 3 years we have dressed up with them but I don't think I will this year.

[newmom84]

Sorry for the sucky days yesterday girls. :grouphug:

Karen, I know you said that you are planning to get a place of your own, do you have a time frame you are shooting for. Right now I live with my sister, but in May I will be getting a place of my own.

Dee Dee that cake is super scary! I share your son's fear of Chucky! I get the heebie jeebies just thinking about it. :laugh: But saying that I think it is HILARIOUS that you did that! I am sure he will get a big laugh out of it.

The cheerleader outfits sound super cute. They sound like they are very proud of their big brother.

[kadas33]

Dee Dee, I LOVE the cake. I sure hope your ds sees the humor in it as we sure do.

Amanda, I'd love to move out today if I could. My attorney has advised me to stay put for now despite the less than ideal living arrangement and circumstances. I know she's trying to protect my assets, but it's really wearing on me. I have no idea when I'm going to be able to move out really. I know if it gets 'too bad' she'd support me moving out although it opens the door to several possibilities which aren't all that great for me. Can I just say how INSANE it is that they expect soon to be exes to live together throughout the divorce process? I was originally going to try to keep the house as I've lived there since 9th grade but I've since realized I don't want the hassle of home ownership, or the expense so I'm ready to walk away from it. Are you excited about your move? I have mixed feelings as I've never lived alone or in an apartment so it will be quite an adjustment.

[newmom84]

To be honest I am a little scared. I barely get by with sharing rent with my sister, so I am not sure what I am going to do on my own. I get all my bills paid but there is absolutely no wiggle room, KWIM? Ive got until May to figure it out, so I have a lot of thinking to do. But in a way I am excited to have a home with just me and my little man. :wub:

I guess I understand about protecting your assets, but like you I would be going bonkers! :pokey: I hope that ya'll are able to get through the divorce quickly.

[twinmom34]

Amanda, I'd love to move out today if I could. My attorney has advised me to stay put for now despite the less than ideal living arrangement and circumstances. I know she's trying to protect my assets, but it's really wearing on me. I have no idea when I'm going to be able to move out really. I know if it gets 'too bad' she'd support me moving out although it opens the door to several possibilities which aren't all that great for me. Can I just say how INSANE it is that they expect soon to be exes to live together throughout the divorce process? I was originally going to try to keep the house as I've lived there since 9th grade but I've since realized I don't want the hassle of home ownership, or the expense so I'm ready to walk away from it.


I may be delusional but I am hoping and praying my attorney will be able to have my husband "evicted". I plan to file and try to petition for a protective order initially b/c of his threats. I hope this will be enough for them to make him leave and let me stay. I understand the protection of assets but I owned this house for 10 years before we married 5yrs ago. It is also the only home my DS21 has and he is still my dependent while in college another two years.


Amanda, have you looked into any type of assistance? Before I became a nurse and was a young single mother with the boys I had assistance with child care, rent, groceries, and dependent needs. I hate that you are only able to do the necessities without any wiggle room!

[EttyBaby]

Hey ladies! I stalk this room constantly but just haven't managed to post yet. Just wanted to say hi! :hi:

[twinmom34]

:hi: I see you have a cute little Bella Grace, what is your name? Welcome!

[EttyBaby]

:hi: I see you have a cute little Bella Grace, what is your name? Welcome!

Thank you! My name is Cassandra :) and yes, I do. She's a character too.

[kadas33]

Dee Dee, I think with your history you should have a case for a restraining order. And since you owned the house prior to the marriage, I can't imagine you would be forced to leave.


Amanda, have you looked into any type of assistance? Before I became a nurse and was a young single mother with the boys I had assistance with child care, rent, groceries, and dependent needs. I hate that you are only able to do the necessities without any wiggle room!

I completely agree with Dee Dee. I was on assistance when I was single mother with my daughter and there's no way I could've done it without it. I hope you are able to have a little wiggle room in the budge at the end of the day.


Hey ladies! I stalk this room constantly but just haven't managed to post yet. Just wanted to say hi! :hi:

Welcome Cassandra! You'll find lots of support here, hope you post more often.

[newmom84]

Hi Cassandra!!! So glad you decided to post! Your daughter is adorable. How are things with you?


Well the things I have looked into, like WIC and daycare assistance, I make like a smidge over the requested income. :eyeroll: Like seriously if I made like $ 100 less I could get the help. Oh well, I guess I should be thankful I have a good paying job.

Ok so I know this is completely random but I don't have cable, so I use bunny ears. So with limited channels you just have to do with what you got for nightly television. Anyway so last night I catch a show on PBS about ferrets. Its about the biggest ferret show in america and the owners and their ferrets and the journey to get to the show. It was the most hilarious thing to me. One woman was saying you have to watch out because they can bite, and then they pan over to another woman that has a gash on her nose and she says, "I got too close." Oh my gosh I was rolling. :lol: It was just so funny how serious they were about their ferrets.
(No offense to anyone who owns a ferret, they are kind of cute, but if you show them then I may have to tease you a little bit. :P )

[kadas33]

Amanda, that program sounds too funny. I'm also a member of the no cable crowd...haven't had it for over a decade as I'm too cheap to pay for it. :laugh: I don't watch much TV anyway so I don't even miss the extra channels. We have Netfilx and even then I rarely watch anything on it.

IDK if you guys saw my post in ranting & venting. I'm just having a terrible, rotten, no-good day. I'm gonna call it a day and go home since I'm not getting anything done at work anyway. Gonna grab a book and head to a park for some reading and relaxing. Hoping tonight gets better because it's been one he11 of a day and I don't know that I can take much more. It's just a good thing that my dh isn't being an a$$ to me right now as it would probably push me over the edge at this point.

[twinmom34]

I'm off to read ranting & raving so I can be caught up before I post...

[twinmom34]

...
Cassandra, One of my closest friends is named Cassandra! I haven’t known her many years, she is a co-worker, but over the last couple of years we have become very good friends. How long have you been a single parent? Do you have family nearby that gives you any help?


Amanda, way to look at the bright side of things! From my experience WIC is one of the most relaxed when it comes to income so, I guess you are right, at least you are making good money J. Can’t say I have ever seen a Ferret Show but, I am sure those people are SERIOUS about their ferrets! I have cable, but more for my family and less for me. I am not much of a TV person but I LOVE the show Snapped on Oxygen so I DVR it a lot!


Karen, I do feel for you. It can be really tough when your friends are hurting and you can’t “fix” them. Sounds like you are a really good friend and will be a shoulder to lean on while they go through their struggles. I am sure the dark road to recovery will be a totally different road than your grieving friend is traveling but they will both need you!


Ashley?? How are things with you? Have you decided on the family photo shoot?


My day is a load of irritation b/c my boss can be soooo difficult at times I think she is difficult just to be difficult! I was supposed to be in a meeting for 2 days. It only lasted ½ day so I thought I would be NICE and go offer my services if she needs them today or tomorrow. She says maybe tomorrow but not today and she will call me in the morning if she needs me! Ummm, don’t think so! I have 4 yr old twins that require a lot! I will make a PLAN to be here tomorrow or a PLAN to stay home. I will not be on call for free until YOU decide to call me! Needless to say she is quite irritated with me for standing up for myself but, I will not be a doormat! I like to have a PLAN!

[ushxcp]

Sorry been a busy, stressful couple of days. Yes, I think I'll probably go through with the family photos. I've been busy and stressed because our district soccer tournament was this week. We were ranked #2, so we played the #3 team on Tuesday and beat them 1-0. Yesterday we had to play the #1 team for the championship.....and we won!!!! Second year in a row my girls team have been district champs. Now we are looking into a city tournament in December, but if that doesn't work out then girls soccer is over and boys soccer will start up in January which I also coach.

Bad part of my day was when the principal came in to show me a letter one of my player's mothers had written about what a lousy coach I was and how dare I didn't play her daughter during these last 2 games. My team consists of 6th, 7th, and 8th graders. Her daughter is 6th grade and isn't very good. Her daughter has played in every single other game, and 4 of those she started even. She isn't good at all. Sometimes there are players I keep in hopes that they will improve or because I see potential, but there is no rule saying I have to play them every game. It's just so frustrating because this mom didn't say one word to me all season and then goes and writes this long horrible e-mail to the principal. Ugh!

Other than that.....Welcome Cassandra!

[twinmom34]

I gotta say I would be ticked over the mother writing the email! Some parents can be sooooo blind. My husband is a coach so I know exactly what you are talking about! He gets these letters a lot. One of my closest friends even confronted him when we were dating b/c her son was not being played enough. He son couldn't catch a cold much less a basketball :laugh: but she could not see that. Sadly enough sometimes the kids don't know their parents are causing such a ruckus.


Sorry for the downer on the cusp of such a great season! Congrats on the district championship! What an accomplishment! I am shocked you coach boys and girls soccer. Is there a difference in the rules?

[ushxcp]

Thanks! Nope, no difference in the rules at all. We even wear the same uniforms for both teams because we have no money. Awful.

[twinmom34]

Ok, I think I have this right...Amanda & I are in Texas, Karen is in St. Louis, Ashley---where do you live?


On a very happy, happy note...today I was approved for a bonus program we have here at the hospital where you can do little "extras" for points and apply once a year for expert or advanced status. I achieved the top level which equates to a $2500 bonus :hooray::hooray:and this bonus is one no one in my house knows about :hooray::hooray:if you girls KWIM!!!!!!!

[kadas33]

Dee Dee, yay for the bonus, just what you needed!

Ashley, congrats on the win! I hope you win the championship.

Man girls, I'm on a roll today. My (ex)BFF is supposed to come in town a week from tomorrow and stay with me for 10 days. We had a falling out last week and I hadn't heard from her since Friday. I figured I was already having a crappy day so why not keep it going. I texted her asking if she was still coming in. She said yes. So I followed up and asked her if she was staying with me and if she was here for 10 days or if she shortened her trip. She thanked me for the offer and told me she was staying with someone else and shortened her trip. I told her it would've been nice had she bothered to tell about her change of plans without me having to ask her. WTF? I was supposed to go visit her in December. Just changed my ticket to fly into LAX and stay with another friend. Also called off my trip to Vegas with her in December. At least I offered her use of the prepaid hotel room in Vegas for when she goes. I also offered up my spot in the marathon if she knew anyone who wanted to go.

Long story short, I did something she asked me not to do although it was none of her business and her request was TOTALLY inappropriate in the first place. I fessed up to her about it and she just can't let it go. At this point I'm sick of her selfishness and making it all about her. I'm going thru a divorce and could really use her support yet she's so caught up in her fantasy world that she can't pull her head out of her a$$ and be a friend when I need her most. Honestly, the longer she stays away the more resentful I grow and I find myself getting pissed off at her. So pathetic that she's wiling to throw our friendship of almost 20 years away over something that was totally inappropriate on her part in the first place.

At least I got it all out there and won't need to ruin a perfectly good day to deal with her crap.

[newmom84]

Ashley congrats on winning District Champs! :hooray: I hope your boys can do just as well!

Dee Dee that is super fantastic about the bonus! Do you have something fun planned to do with it?

Karen, I am so sorry about everything that is going on. Don't they always say when it rains it pours? I hope your friend will come to her senses and see whatever yall's fight was about is nothing to throw away a 20 year friendship over. :hugs:

[ushxcp]

Dee Dee, yay for that bonus! Karen, I'm sorry you are having such a rough time with your friends.

I live in Phoenix.

[twinmom34]

Dee Dee that is super fantastic about the bonus! Do you have something fun planned to do with it?


I am sure it should not be considered fun but yes, in the end it will be more fun days at our house, I plan to use it to unload a burden in my life in a few months :winks:.

[twinmom34]

Ashley, I plan to drive to Disney Land next year, I may have to stop in Phoenix and say hello!


Karen, I really do feel bad for you that your friend is being such a PITA! Too bad she doesn't see it for face value. But, it looks like you have taken lemons and made lemonade! Too bad I don't run, I would love to have an excuse to go to Vegas!

[newmom84]

I am sure it should not be considered fun but yes, in the end it will be more fun days at our house, I plan to use it to unload a burden in my life in a few months :winks:.


I think I catch your drift. :winks: :cabbage:

[caitlinsmommy]

Alright ladies I am coming back in here :crazy:

I am just so fed up with DH right now. I seriously feel like I am just waiting for the perfect time for me to leave. Our lease ends december 31st. I think i might end things then. I have been budgeting my bills and I can cover everything (as long as I forgo cable and fancy phone plans) except food :laugh:

Seriously though, spending 800 a month on childcare and a 350 dollar carpayment along with housing, electric, etc. I can just cover everything on my own but I have no money for food :pokey: This is what keeps holding me back. I would need child support from DH to make sure I could handle things. He is in the process of enlisting in the reserves as long as he can get this medical waiver thing he has been trying to get for like 3 months. He should know by the end of this month. I think thats the security I need because I am assuming they will deduct his wages from that if he bails on child support, right???

I am just so afraid that he will snap and not pay me child support and I don't know what I would do. My income is too high to get any support at all so I would be on my own. My mom says I could always stay with her if needed but I dont want to. I want to do this on my own. Ugh-I need a raise of 400 dollars a month. :laugh:


In all seriousness though, I just dont have any attraction toward DH anymore. He completely ruined our relationship and I just can't forgive him. I had sex with him the other day and was so not in the mood for it (tmi) that I actually told him to just get it over with or else I was going to bed.I get upset when he tries to kiss me. I find myself mad at him for asking me for anything. I hate that he doesn't help me around the house and that he feels like we are fine now. I've explained to him my frustration and I really dont think he understands how bad he messed up.


Edit: I approached him on it all today and told him I want a divorce. He was very defeated but is finally starting to realize why what he did hurt our relationship permanently. I've been going over my finances-and I need about 300 dollars a month in child support to be okay. He appears to be very civil and says this will not be a problem at all. Our lease ends december-we will part ways then. I'm wondering if I should start the divorce process now-will they let you do that while still in the same home? Neither of us can afford our place on our own so we would either have to break the lease-which I don't want to do or wait it out till then.

[twinmom34]

You got me on the divorce question but if you grocery shop on a budget you should not need anywhere near $300 TO $400 to feed you and the baby. Currently I feed my family of myself, my husband, my DS21 along with his gf about 3 nights a week and the twin 4 year old on $225 per month. I am a budget NAZI though! Good luck on whatever decision you make, we are here for you!

[kadas33]

:hi: Hi Cathy. From what I know about your situation, I think you are making the right decision. Don't get me wrong, it will be a difficult transition but you and your dd will be SO much better off in the long run.

Yes, you can file for divorce while still living together. I filed 4 weeks ago and dh and I still are living together, although I'd much rather not be living here.

I haven't gotten to the child support part of my case yet, but I don't see why they couldn't have it garnished from his wages. In fact, most people I know who are paying CS have it automatically deducted.

I will warn you that divorce isn't cheap. My attorney, who is about average in price for my area, requires a $2,500 retainer and charges $250/hour. Having said that, you DEFINITELY want to hire an attorney to make sure you and your dd's interests are protected.

[kadas33]

Happy Monday ladies! So, Wednesday is my 9th anniversary. I've got a really fun evening planned to celebrate...without dh of course. Even got a sitter lined up so I can fully enjoy the evening. Looking forward to it, just might be my best anniversary ever. :winks:

[newmom84]

Hi Cathy. :hi: Welcome!
I can't relate to the divorce stuff like the other ladies can, but I totally relate to the budgeting stuff. I currently live with my sister to help out with finances, but in June I will be moving out on my on. Like you I make just over to qualify for any help. I'm excited to be out on my own but scared to know how tight the money will be. Just wanted you to know that each of us can relate to what you are going through. :hugs:

Karen, I'm glad to see that you are looking forward to your anniversary with excitement. It will be a night to celebrate your independence and a new chapter in your life. :partyhat:

How was everyone's weekend?

[EttyBaby]

Welcome Cassandra! You'll find lots of support here, hope you post more often.

Thank you! I'm looking forward to it!


Hi Cassandra!!! So glad you decided to post! Your daughter is adorable. How are things with you?

Aw, thanks. She's awesome. Things are pretty good with me! Busy, but good.


...
Cassandra, One of my closest friends is named Cassandra! I haven’t known her many years, she is a co-worker, but over the last couple of years we have become very good friends. How long have you been a single parent? Do you have family nearby that gives you any help?

I've been a single parent since I was around 12 weeks pregnant. My choice to be a single parent, his choice to have basically no involvement in her life. I ended the relationship shortly after finding out I was pregnant - I just couldn't stay in an unhappy relationship nor raise a child around one. He has seen her twice. Once when she was 8 days old and once when she was 10 months old. She is now almost 2.5 years old and he's a complete stranger. While I feel badly that she doesn't have him in her life, I'm also glad not to have to deal with him. He recently got married and his new wife is trying her hardest to convince him to sign away all his rights to Bella because she wants to be "first" in having a family with him. Nice, huh? :pokey:

[newmom84]

I've been a single parent since I was around 12 weeks pregnant. My choice to be a single parent, his choice to have basically no involvement in her life. I ended the relationship shortly after finding out I was pregnant - I just couldn't stay in an unhappy relationship nor raise a child around one. He has seen her twice. Once when she was 8 days old and once when she was 10 months old. She is now almost 2.5 years old and he's a complete stranger. While I feel badly that she doesn't have him in her life, I'm also glad not to have to deal with him. He recently got married and his new wife is trying her hardest to convince him to sign away all his rights to Bella because she wants to be "first" in having a family with him. Nice, huh? :pokey:

Well he is a fool! I can relate being happy not to have to deal with him. I'm trying to work with baby daddy, but I feel like he has no real interest in Eli. Just whenever its convenient for him.

Ok so a single mom, who has done this for 2.5 years, any advice for someone just starting out like me, who is on month 4?

[twinmom34]

Good lord ladies, I am missing for 24 hours and there is so much to respond to/comment on I had to quote them in order to keep up :laugh:!



Happy Monday ladies! So, Wednesday is my 9th anniversary. I've got a really fun evening planned to celebrate...without dh of course. Even got a sitter lined up so I can fully enjoy the evening. Looking forward to it, just might be my best anniversary ever. :winks:


I am glad you have happy plans b/c I can see where this would be a depressing day if you didn't make some type of adjustment to your plans! I hope my next anniversary is happier than my last. The night before our anniversay this summer I got up randomly around midnight-1am and found my husband who "only has an occasional beer" drinking a bottle of Crown Royal in our living room. Needless to say our anniversary was anything but happy!



I totally relate to the budgeting stuff.


Have you ever looked into Dave Ramsey? I live by his envelope system and it has helped me tremendously!



He recently got married and his new wife is trying her hardest to convince him to sign away all his rights to Bella because she wants to be "first" in having a family with him. Nice, huh? :pokey:


:laugh: this wife makes me laugh! Does she think just b/c she erases his name from her life he gets to start with a clean "family" slate? I guess she also thinks if she erases the names of the people she ever slept with she is a reborn virgin also!


Ok so a single mom, who has done this for 2.5 years, any advice for someone just starting out like me, who is on month 4?


I did it for 16 years before I got married and my best advice is:
1. Be strong! As a momma, financial planner, taxi driver, housekeeper, cook, phychologist, disciplinarian, teacher, etc...you will wear many different hats throughout your child's life!
2.Keep an emergency fund! You never know when an emergency is going to happen!
3.Never badmouth their father in front of them or within their earshot. They will be able to decide on their own what type of father he is. I know of many a time when I was sooooo angry with DS1 father and he was such a LOSER but I kept my mouth shut! DS1 knew at a very young age his father was a LOSER without me telling him. Kids are smart.
4.Enjoy the memories! They grow up way too fast!

[twinmom34]

We had a great weekend. Me, DS1 and the twins went to a fall festival in Rowlett which is about 2 hours away and really enjoyed ourselves. It was nice to not have to deal with my husband for a day. I took some cute pics of the girls I hope to figure out how to post within the next week and will share!



I now have a problem...I am pretty much completely emotionally detached and my husband just told me he has plans tomorrow night for us. Sadly enough I really have no desire to go anywhere with him :headbang:. Not sure how I will handle that!

[newmom84]

I did it for 16 years before I got married and my best advice is:
1. Be strong! As a momma, financial planner, taxi driver, housekeeper, cook, phychologist, disciplinarian, teacher, etc...you will wear many different hats throughout your child's life!
2.Keep an emergency fund! You never know when an emergency is going to happen!
3.Never badmouth their father in front of them or within their earshot. They will be able to decide on their own what type of father he is. I know of many a time when I was sooooo angry with DS1 father and he was such a LOSER but I kept my mouth shut! DS1 knew at a very young age his father was a LOSER without me telling him. Kids are smart.
4.Enjoy the memories! They grow up way too fast!

Thanks Dee Dee! All of these are good. Especially number 3.

I don't think you realize how strong you are until you become a mother. I feel like a totally different person these days.

[twinmom34]

Ok, my "secret night" out turned out decent. We went to eat and to see Courageous. Dinner was good and the movie ended up being what I perceived as a slap in the face to my husband.


He had told me over the weekend it was a movie like Fireproof which focused on a marriage. I don't want to spoil it for anyone but I sum it up as a movie focusing on a father's role in a marriage and in their children's lives. I helped me to see that I am doing some of the things I have always said I would do in the past. My friends who had little ones while my kids were in jr high I used to tell my friends...quit sweating the small stuff, years from now you will wish you had allowed them to play in the mud, wished you had played in the rain for them, wished you had taken the time to color with them, etc...


Now that I have the twins so many years after my boys I feel like I am much more laid back. I frequently encourage my husband to stop stressing about the kids doing simple things. But he doesn't listen to me :headbang:.


I have to wonder after the movie what his thoughts are?????

[EttyBaby]

Well he is a fool! I can relate being happy not to have to deal with him. I'm trying to work with baby daddy, but I feel like he has no real interest in Eli. Just whenever its convenient for him.

Ok so a single mom, who has done this for 2.5 years, any advice for someone just starting out like me, who is on month 4?

He is a fool. And its entirely his loss. He's never contributed to her life in any fashion - not any time, money, or energy. Quite frankly most days I wish he'd just entirely take himself out of the picture.

Time management is the biggest thing I've had to learn as a single mom. I'm a full time student applying to both medical and nursing schools this month, so balancing school and motherhood has been my biggest effort as a single mom. Thankfully, I have an awesome family who love and dote on her every chance they get when I need a break.

Dee Dee had great advice, and she's much more equipped to give it! I'm still learning every day!

[kadas33]

Okay ladies, I'm ready to throw in the towel...ugh. Last night dh asked me if I had decided if I'm running my marathon on Sunday. I told him I hadn't decided yet. He then told me that he and the kids are going to make a sign and go down and support my (ex)BFF and he guesses they could do the same for me if I was running it. Great, now I have him and her ganging up on me. That sealed the deal. I'm for sure not running it now and it was the nail in the coffin for our friendship. They say when it rains it pours, that's an understatement.

And to top things off. I had some exciting plans to celebrate my 9th anniversary tonight (without dh of course), but it looks like those are falling through. I've already lined up a sitter so I may just be spending it alone, exactly what I didn't want to do.

ETA: Sorry for being such a Debby Downer lately. Just so sick and tired of being crapped on. My pool of friends is quickly dwindling, so thankful I can vent to you girls.

[newmom84]

Okay ladies, I'm ready to throw in the towel...ugh. Last night dh asked me if I had decided if I'm running my marathon on Sunday. I told him I hadn't decided yet. He then told me that he and the kids are going to make a sign and go down and support my (ex)BFF and he guesses they could do the same for me if I was running it. Great, now I have him and her ganging up on me. That sealed the deal. I'm for sure not running it now and it was the nail in the coffin for our friendship. They say when it rains it pours, that's an understatement.

And to top things off. I had some exciting plans to celebrate my 9th anniversary tonight (without dh of course), but it looks like those are falling through. I've already lined up a sitter so I may just be spending it alone, exactly what I didn't want to do.

ETA: Sorry for being such a Debby Downer lately. Just so sick and tired of being crapped on. My pool of friends is quickly dwindling, so thankful I can vent to you girls.


You are not being a Debby Downer! Things are crappy for you right now! Don't hesitate to vent here.
Is your exDH friends with your BFF? Does he know that ya'll are fighting? Ex or not, sounds messed up for him to go ahead and support her.

[kadas33]

They are only friends through me, so no. It's a crappy situation all around.

[twinmom34]

Okay ladies, I'm ready to throw in the towel...ugh. Last night dh asked me if I had decided if I'm running my marathon on Sunday. I told him I hadn't decided yet. He then told me that he and the kids are going to make a sign and go down and support my (ex)BFF and he guesses they could do the same for me if I was running it. Great, now I have him and her ganging up on me. That sealed the deal. I'm for sure not running it now and it was the nail in the coffin for our friendship. They say when it rains it pours, that's an understatement.

And to top things off. I had some exciting plans to celebrate my 9th anniversary tonight (without dh of course), but it looks like those are falling through. I've already lined up a sitter so I may just be spending it alone, exactly what I didn't want to do.

ETA: Sorry for being such a Debby Downer lately. Just so sick and tired of being crapped on. My pool of friends is quickly dwindling, so thankful I can vent to you girls.



You are not being Debby Downer! We are here to support you. Even if it is to give you bad advice (as in my words that will follow) ---- I would run the marathon strictly to be able to run by him with his sign and kick him in the balls :lol:what an a$$! Who takes their kids to go support another woman at a marathon that their mother will be running in??? I tend to think this is some work on your exBFF's side, I tend to believe she may be trying to "pay you back".



How did your night go?

[kadas33]

You are not being Debby Downer! We are here to support you. Even if it is to give you bad advice (as in my words that will follow) ---- I would run the marathon strictly to be able to run by him with his sign and kick him in the balls :lol:what an a$$! Who takes their kids to go support another woman at a marathon that their mother will be running in??? I tend to think this is some work on your exBFF's side, I tend to believe she may be trying to "pay you back".



How did your night go?

I got in a spat w/the exBFF yesterday, just because I was in a fighting mood. :laugh: She claims she didn't know they'd be there to support her, but I call bullsh!t on that one. Regardless, I've decided to not bother with the crowds and risk running into her. She hinted that she was hoping I'd be at the finish line waiting for her since she literally has no one here in town to support her. I told her apparently my family is supporting her and I couldn't be bothered with the craziness of the event.

My night was super boring. I ended up grabbing drinks with a friend and his wife. They were okay company, but it was a HUGE letdown considering how what I had originally planned for the evening. However, it was probably for the best that my plans fell through...although it sucks. Guess I'll just have to make up for it another time. :winks:

[kadas33]

Can I just say that karma's a b!tch. She's currently working her magic (not on me) and I couldn't be more thrilled!!! What goes around comes around. Great way to start off the weekend, that's for sure.

Do you ladies have anything exciting planned for the weekend?

[newmom84]

Well I am glad that things are getting better for you Karen. :laugh:

No big plans here. My niece's birthday party is Saturday. It's a costume party so that will be fun to see all the kiddos dressed up. Besides that not much going on.

Eli had his 4 month baby well visit yesterday. He is measuring on the smaller side,(he went from 33% to 20% on weight) but the doctor said we won't worry unless he regresses again at his 6 month appointment.
It's so funny all through my pregnancy they kept beating it into my head that I was going to have this monster of a baby. Guess I am still getting used to that he will just be my little guy. :wub:

[twinmom34]

Amanda, I know I say it a lot but Eli is such a cute little guy! He doesn't look "small" to me but, I am also judging this on my two who I thought were really small all the time.


Karen, glad to hear Karma is working her magic! I hope she lays it on heavy!


I don't have any big plans. I am working 12 hours in the ER Saturday night which will be my last overtime night for a while :( when basketball season starts my husband and sons are not available for the girls so I can't work the extra shifts. I will miss the extra money but we will be ok. I am excited basketball is starting though b/c that means I get to travel to my son's games and it will give us something to do!

[EttyBaby]

I wish we did something exciting this weekend! I had a beast of a midterm last week and another one next week, so studying is running my life right now. But the toddler, a friend, and I managed to find time to carve pumpkins tonight. :)

[kadas33]

Amandas, Eli doesn't look very little to me either, but my guy has always been on the small side. Just keep doing what you are doing and I'm sure he'll be fine. How was the birthday party? Did you dress Eli up?

Dee Dee, that sucks about the overtime, but I'm sure you'll enjoy the break...both from the extra work and also from dh. :laugh:

Cassandra, ugh, going to school as a single mom is SO stressful. I'm glad you are managing to balance it all, it'll be worth it in the long run. Your Bella is so adorable. Was this a just a friend or a 'friend'?

My weekend was crazy busy and loads of fun. Went to the pub crawl on Friday night but didn't make it past the first stop :cabbage: The organizers chose my most favorite martini bar as the first stop and after quite a few martinis I had no desire to move to the next stop. Felt kinda bad for ditching the group but my friend and I met up with some friends of a friend and hung out with them all night. Managed to close down the martini bar so we had to head over to the 3am bar. It was close to 4 when I finally strolled in for the night, haven't been out that late in ages.

Saturday I had to run down and pick up my swag bag for the marathon I didn't run. Figured I should get my goodies and not completely waste my money. Spent part of the afternoon lounging on a bench at the park as it was absolutely gorgeous outside. Saturday night I went out with a friend to a little bar in his small town to catch the World Series (go Cards!!!) game. That was one long game and I was super tired. It was yet another late night by the time I made it home.

Sunday I managed to sleep in until 10 which never happens. Had my cousin's baby shower in the afternoon. Boy was that fun having my dad tell me I'm making the biggest mistake of my life, the grass isn't greener on the other side, he can't understand why I'm leaving my 'good' husband, and I'm the reason dd's grades are falling. :eyeroll:

Now for the exBFF drama. I came home Friday night before the pub crawl to change clothes. Walk into my back yard and the exBFF was in the back yard playing with my ds but dh and dd weren't home. Yeah, that was awkward. I wasn't really expecting to see her and was totally caught off guard. I made small talk with her but that was it. Kept it casual and quick.

The marathon was on Sunday. Dh and the kids went down to watch the exBFF run it. She later texted me and said she really thought I'd be down there and she was disappointed that I wasn't there for her. :eyebrow: Seriously? I told her it was awkward enough on Friday for me and not only did I not want to make it uncomfortable for her, I didn't want to see my family down there. She's made no effort to see me since she's been in town yet she thinks I'd want to fight all the people and traffic to go watch her run, no thanks. I invited her to go with a group of us tonight to the gay bar for homo bingo but she said she probably won't go. Oh well, at least I extended the invite.

[EttyBaby]

Cassandra, ugh, going to school as a single mom is SO stressful. I'm glad you are managing to balance it all, it'll be worth it in the long run. Your Bella is so adorable. Was this a just a friend or a 'friend'?

It does have its stressful moments! Managing my time is crucial and I dont get much sleep most nights, but thankfully I love it.

He is my purely platonic best friend who happens to be male. :laugh:

[twinmom34]

He is my purely platonic best friend who happens to be male. :laugh:


Guys are sooooo much better as friends :laugh:! I had several in my single days and REALLY miss them these days.



Saturday night I went out with a friend to a little bar in his small town to catch the World Series (go Cards!!!) game. That was one long game and I was super tired. It was yet another late night by the time I made it home.


And you little miss...is that a friend or a friend? :laugh:


Karen, I agree exBFF in your backyard with your kids would be a little awkward. Just why are her and your ex such a friendly group these days? Did you tell your dad thanks for the support?? And last but not least, what is homo bingo?



Just ate a really awesome, yummy pot of beans and cornbread. Now I am sleepy and it is only 6:30 in the eveneing!

[kadas33]

Oh, he's just a friend although he's made it VERY clear he'd like it to be much more. Too bad I'm just not into him. :laugh:

Beans and cornbread sounds so yummy! :bellyrubs:

Homo bingo is interesting to say the least. Picture a gay bar, a drag queen, and bingo and you've got yourself some homo bingo. Gotta love it every time he/she called B11 and she'd announce B11 and say B with 2 d!icks, yum yum. It was a hoot! I won two rounds and a good time was had by all. I went with a friend and her friend and the exBFF came too. That was awkward and cold at first but it did get a bit better. Well that was until she and I went out for a very late dinner just the 2 of us. That was incredibly depressing on so many levels. :ohno: Such a crappy way to end the evening.

[twinmom34]

Karen sounds like you ended your evening depressed but hopefully you and exBFF?? opened some lines of communication. I wish I had the social life you have :laugh: sounds like you have all kinds of fun things to do in your city!

[EttyBaby]

The homo bingo sounds like a blast!

[kadas33]

ExBFF and I have been talking/texting a lot. Think we are going to do lunch together this afternoon and I invited her to the theatre with me tonight. I think we MIGHT be able to move past all of this although I know things will never be the same. Dang, why does life have to be so complicated?!?

ETA: Lunch was great, we both had a good time and the food was delicious! She's going with me to see a play tonight. So glad things are getting better between her and I.

[EttyBaby]

Dang, why does life have to be so complicated?!?

I ask myself this daily. Still trying to come up with an answer!

So glad you and exBFF may be able to work past things and have some kind of friendship again even if it'll never be what it once was.

I'm supposed to be studying. I have a midterm at 6pm (why my professors insist on night exams I'll never know!) but just haven't been able to focus today. B has a cough and hasn't been sleeping well, so I'd much rather be taking a nap!

[kadas33]

Ugh, that's no good. Can you take a 20 minute cat nap and refresh a bit? I hope you rock out on your midterm! Do you feel at least somewhat prepared for it? Hats off to you for juggling school, life and your little one.

[twinmom34]

I hope your midterm went well. Going to school as a single parent was the best thing I could have ever done for my kids. I now have a career and we are financially secure! Keep up the good work!


Karen, way to go on being a good enough friend to move on! I wish my friends were that awesome!


I had a TERRIBLE morning!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have a HORRIBLE fear of the dentist. I know it sounds stupid and lame but they make me sick to my stomach, my heart races and I am a total wreck until I am done. I have been complaining to my dentist for a month that I think my tooth is cracked. Well...now it is broken! I was eating a bagel for breakfast this morning and felt something weird, yep it was half of my tooth missing!

It was my furthest back tooth, I went straight to the dentist to be there when they opened and they were able to ?bond? it until Nov. 17th :shocker: when they can get me in to take care of it :ohno:. So, I am not in pain but I am terrified of it hurting/breaking more so I am consuming liquids only until I can build up the courage to eat something solid.


I am such a freak about my teeth I am procrastinating going to bed b/c I grind my teeth while I sleep and I am afraid of "hurting" it while I sleep. Ughhhhh!!! As stated in pp...why does life have to be soooo complicated?????

[kadas33]

Dee Dee, I'm the exact same way...terrified of the dentist. I had a horrible experience as a child and it kept me away from the dentist for years. My teeth were in such bad shape that when I had my wisdom teeth removed I told them to take out any others that need a root canal. Needless to say, I no longer have a mouth full of teeth. I would rather lose them then go through the procedure to fix them. :eyeroll: I've since found a much nicer, gentler dentist and spent hours upon hours getting them all fixed. I sure hope that it doesn't give you any trouble between now and your follow up appointment. Your fears aren't irrational, or else at least you've got good company. :winks:

[ushxcp]

Hi ladies. Sorry it's been a while. Last week I was on Fall Break from work and I just haven't been on the computer much. It was really nice to be able to take my older son to school in the mornings and pick him up. I also got a chance to take the boys down to visit my grandparents for the weekend. They have only seen my younger DS once and they really enjoyed the chance to get to know him.

Dee Dee - ouch on the tooth!! I cannot believe you have to wait that long to see the dentist. I could not eat or drink anything with a broken tooth.

[EttyBaby]

Major ouch on the tooth Dee Dee! I also have a horrible fear of the dentist, I feel ill just thinking about it. But my teeth could more than use another trip.

The midterm wasn't terrible. Math is far from my favorite subject though so I tend to just aim for survival. Now my immunology midterm last week was a dream compared to last night's. :laugh:

Besides chasing a two year old and being a full time student, I'm also learning a new language before taking a trip next June with that same friend. So excited!!

[kadas33]

Hi ladies. Sorry it's been a while. Last week I was on Fall Break from work and I just haven't been on the computer much. It was really nice to be able to take my older son to school in the mornings and pick him up. I also got a chance to take the boys down to visit my grandparents for the weekend. They have only seen my younger DS once and they really enjoyed the chance to get to know him.


We missed you. Glad to hear you got a chance to relax a bit on your break. I'm sure the visit with your grandparents was a welcome distraction.

Cassandra, where are you going on your trip? I assume somewhere overseas?

[EttyBaby]

Cassandra, where are you going on your trip? I assume somewhere overseas?

We're going to Scotland for 3 weeks. :)

[angelskii07]

I need to talk to someone, I have 3 children 15 12 and 8. Now Im 6 weeks pregnant with my 4th but the father is in denial of the child being his! Im getting stressed out and I dont know what to do about this hole thing. My older children are with my ex husband that past away. I have found my self crying all the time. He keeps also telling me that He will take the baby from me as well. I lost and dont know where to turn.:ohno:

[newmom84]

I need to talk to someone, I have 3 children 15 12 and 8. Now Im 6 weeks pregnant with my 4th but the father is in denial of the child being his! Im getting stressed out and I dont know what to do about this hole thing. My older children are with my ex husband that past away. I have found my self crying all the time. He keeps also telling me that He will take the baby from me as well. I lost and dont know where to turn.:ohno:

I can't tell exactly what is going on from your post, but I just want to say that I know that it doesn't look like it right now but everything will work out. It always does in the end no matter how dreary at first.
So the father to this baby is the same father to the other children and he is denying that it is his? Do I have that correct?

[newmom84]

We're going to Scotland for 3 weeks. :)

SO JEALOUS!!! You know when someone asks you, where would you go for your dream vacation,.... yeah that's where I would go! That and Ireland.

What language are you learning?

ETA: Is that a stupid question? Is there a Scottish language?

[kadas33]

We're going to Scotland for 3 weeks. :)

So jealous. Take lots of pics because we need to live vicariously through you. :laugh:


I need to talk to someone, I have 3 children 15 12 and 8. Now Im 6 weeks pregnant with my 4th but the father is in denial of the child being his! Im getting stressed out and I dont know what to do about this hole thing. My older children are with my ex husband that past away. I have found my self crying all the time. He keeps also telling me that He will take the baby from me as well. I lost and dont know where to turn.:ohno:

Why is he denying the child? Unless you've done something wrong (drug addict, alcoholic, abusive)I wouldn't worry about his threats. It's hard to get a judge to agree to take a child away from either parent. Good luck. :hugs:

[twinmom34]

angelskii007, I answered your other post but wanted to welcome you to our room!



Cassandra, do you need a nurse to go to Scotland with you? I am available should you decide :winks:. I will try my best to fit into a suitcase if that is what it takes :laugh:.



Ashley, we missed you! I am glad you got a break from school. They used to have a fall break here but quit about 7 or 8 years ago. It was awesome to be able to go on vacation with my boys when it was not "prime" vacation time.



Thanks for all the sympathy on my tooth ladies. It is broken but the bond stuff they put on it is supposed to act as a "tooth" until I am able to get an appt. And I am not happy I have so many women in my shoes with dentist fears but I am glad to know I am not alone.

[EttyBaby]

SO JEALOUS!!! You know when someone asks you, where would you go for your dream vacation,.... yeah that's where I would go! That and Ireland.

What language are you learning?

ETA: Is that a stupid question? Is there a Scottish language?

I am SO excited, its my dream vacation too! Were doing a long weekend on the coast of Ireland too. I'm learning Scottish Gaelic. Its a very old language and only about 1-2% of the Scottish population still speak it, there are a lot of revival efforts though. Plus, the Scottish islands we'll also be visiting have a large Gaelic speaking population so we decided to go for it and learn as much as we can before we go!


So jealous. Take lots of pics because we need to live vicariously through you. :laugh:

I'll take tons! I'm already planning new camera lenses to buy specifically for the trip! :)



Cassandra, do you need a nurse to go to Scotland with you? I am available should you decide :winks:. I will try my best to fit into a suitcase if that is what it takes :laugh:.

:laugh: If you can fit, come along!

[twinmom34]

Oh my! I just looked at our room and the Net??? was missing since we hadn't "talked" in more than a day.....


So here I am to say hello! Have a great weekend! I went and got a haircut, highlight and pedi this morning so I am feeling refreshed. My son is in Utah playing basketball and the girls are running around in their pajamas still coloring :laugh:!

[EttyBaby]

:hi:

I'm sick thanks to so many college students who dont cough into their elbows or wash their hands! Bella has a bit of a cough, but I'm hoping she doesn't get the dreadful head cold I've got going on.

I promised her we'd go play in some leaves today. So we're bundling up, I'm putting some hot tea in a thermos, and we're going leaf-crunching in her princess Aurora Halloween costume. :laugh: Two year olds are hilarious. But it should make for good pictures!

[twinmom34]

Looks like you ended up with some really cute pics! Where are all our single mommas???


Halloween was fun for us. We have some really good friends who appreciate the twins trick or treating so we only went to 6 friends houses but we.were.completely.worn.out.at.the.end.of.the.nigh t! Halloween was great for the girls!


What did you all do for Halloween?

[kadas33]

:hi: I'm around, just not posting much. So sick of the ups and downs, ugh.

Last night was my week with the kids but I let dh take them with him to his family's Halloween party since ds would have more fun then just going around the neighborhood with me. It was a lonely, introspective night.

[newmom84]

I'm still here! :hi:

Me and Eli handed out candy to the trick-or-treaters. I was going to take him out with all of his cousins, but I think we made the better decision.

Dee Dee, did your girlies go as cheerleaders?

[EttyBaby]

I'm here, just still dreadfully sick. I'm thinking its a sinus infection. I also have another midterm this thursday.

Halloween was fun! Bella got to wear her costume to preschool and the whole children's center went trick or treating through all the classrooms. She loved it and got lots of goodies. But with me being sick and it being so cold here already, I decided not to trick or treat around the neighborhood, and she was exhausted anyway. :laugh:

[twinmom34]

Karen, if you are sick of the ups and downs with us...I am sorry if we made you feel bad :ohno: if you are sick of the ups and downs in your life that is what we are here for...to support you. :hugs:Also, that was very kind and generous of you to allow the kids to go with your ex for the fun. It shows you have what it takes to not make this divorce out to be a bad thing for them.


Cassandra, OTC Mucinex or the generic brand equivalent is good for the sinus gunk!


Amanda, yes the girls went as cheerleaders and I think it was a great idea. My husband and I have always dressed up with them. The first year it was a barnyard...they were puppy dogs, husband was a cow and I was a chicken :lol:; the next year they were witches and we were zombies; this year they were cheerleaders and I was the cheerleading coach :winks: and since husband is detached these days he was nothing but his bump on a log self. I am going to try to get a pic uploaded this week of them in costume. My best one is of them with DS21 and I feel kind of bad it doesn't include DS23.

[EttyBaby]

Thanks Dee Dee, I'm definitely at the point where I'm going to have to break down and get some meds!

But I did find out today that I got a 101 on my Immunology midterm, so that made my day. :hooray:

[twinmom34]

Thanks Dee Dee, I'm definitely at the point where I'm going to have to break down and get some meds!

But I did find out today that I got a 101 on my Immunology midterm, so that made my day. :hooray:


:shocker: WOW! Way to go! What are you studying for?

[EttyBaby]

:shocker: WOW! Way to go! What are you studying for?

I've just about finished both a BS in biology and chemistry, and am currently applying to both med school and nursing school and seeing what happens. :)

[twinmom34]

I've just about finished both a BS in biology and chemistry, and am currently applying to both med school and nursing school and seeing what happens. :)


You go girl :winks:! I am impressed. I have always said if I had it to do over again I would have been much more adventurous (sp) and become an ER doctor! I am an RN though and love my career. I am just too old and have lost too many brain cells to even think about going back to school :laugh:.

[EttyBaby]

You go girl :winks:! I am impressed. I have always said if I had it to do over again I would have been much more adventurous (sp) and become an ER doctor! I am an RN though and love my career. I am just too old and have lost too many brain cells to even think about going back to school :laugh:.

Thank you! I'm only 22, so I'm hoping if I regret what I choose I have enough time to change my mind! :laugh:

[twinmom34]

I am 39 now and didn't think about a different career until just a couple of years ago, I work prn in the ER so I am around ER doctors a lot :winks:.

[kadas33]

Dee Dee, OMG-no. It's never ups and downs with you girls, you girls are my lifeline. It's just the never ending roller coaster/crazy train that I seem to be on at this point in my life. I KNOW it will get better and that I'll weather the storm fine, it's just so taxing and draining at times. Yesterday I made the decision to part ways (or at least take a break) from some people in my life who were causing me stress (most by no doing on their part). I need to reprioritize my life again and focus on me. I've lost sight of myself and my needs and I need to get that back.

Cassandra, you rock. :cabbage: I'm SO proud of you and your accomplishments. You really can do anything you put your mind too and you are well on your way.

Amanda, I can't say I blame you for hanging out at home and not braving the streets to trick or treat with Eli. He won't remember it anyway.

Dh and I had the opportunity to have a discussion last night sans kids. I was extremely nervous about it but went into it with the right frame of mind. Unfortunately it was a complete and total bust, awful basically from the get go. If nothing else, it confirmed for me that it's going to be a long, drawn out, expensive, emotionally draining divorce. Gee, I just can't wait.

[newmom84]

Girls I have officially decided to go to court for child support. I have been putting it off hoping that he would come around and be responsible but it is just not happening and it is just creating fights.

He is going to be super pissed but I have to think about what is best for Eli, and there are things that I am not being able to buy for him because I can't afford it. I think this is for the best. It will be done and decided and no more fighting. :cabbage:

[angelskii07]

I can't tell exactly what is going on from your post, but I just want to say that I know that it doesn't look like it right now but everything will work out. It always does in the end no matter how dreary at first.
So the father to this baby is the same father to the other children and he is denying that it is his? Do I have that correct?

No He is A new man in my life The Father to the Others Passed away. He just insecure of everything and said I have been cheating when thats no where near the truth! Now He wont even talk to me at all. I have not talked to him in 3 days and He has never ignored any of my calls or texts. I have not stressed about it but, now I wonder if he will even be around at all for the baby. But I have been single since 2007 and raising my other 3 alone since their dad passed away. I know I can do it alone I have plenty of support with friends and family Im just feel over whelmed about what he is doing I guess.

[EttyBaby]

Girls I have officially decided to go to court for child support. I have been putting it off hoping that he would come around and be responsible but it is just not happening and it is just creating fights.

He is going to be super pissed but I have to think about what is best for Eli, and there are things that I am not being able to buy for him because I can't afford it. I think this is for the best. It will be done and decided and no more fighting. :cabbage:

Good for you! Its something I still haven't done nearly 2 and a half years later. Her father has never provided a single thing or penny to her.

[angelskii07]

So jealous. Take lots of pics because we need to live vicariously through you. :laugh:



Why is he denying the child? Unless you've done something wrong (drug addict, alcoholic, abusive)I wouldn't worry about his threats. It's hard to get a judge to agree to take a child away from either parent. Good luck. :hugs:

He has told me other people have told him that Im not pregnant by him. And he is taken their word over mine. I am completely drug FREE NEVER done any drugs in my life, I dont drink and if any one is abusive would be him. I have raised my other 3 on my own since 2007 when their dad passed away. So I know I can do this. I think he is just trying to stressing me into miscarrying.... And now he's not even talking to me at all He wont return a call or text. But Im not letting it bother me. Talking to you Ladies Has helped me a lot!! Thank you for the support!

[newmom84]

No He is A new man in my life The Father to the Others Passed away. He just insecure of everything and said I have been cheating when thats no where near the truth! Now He wont even talk to me at all. I have not talked to him in 3 days and He has never ignored any of my calls or texts. I have not stressed about it but, now I wonder if he will even be around at all for the baby. But I have been single since 2007 and raising my other 3 alone since their dad passed away. I know I can do it alone I have plenty of support with friends and family Im just feel over whelmed about what he is doing I guess.


I totally understand about feeling overwhelmed. This is pretty much what my baby daddy did at first too. But after things calmed down he eventually came around. Hopefully this guy does too.

How far along are you? How old are your other children?

Congratulations by the way! :bellyrubs: You are the only one expecting in this room right now.

[ushxcp]

Halloween was a little sad. I took the boys out trick or treating by myself and husband sat at our house and handed out candy. Just another first we aren't doing together. My big emotional issue lately has been having to wrap my head around him dating someone. I am for sure wanting a divorce but that still doesn't make it any easier knowing he is seeing someone else. I have been with him 10 years, he's mine...lol But trust me, I don't want him anymore. I'm just sad to lose the plan of a family together I had envisioned. The BIGGEST issue with the whole situation though is that he thinks it's ok to introduce our children to her!! What!?! He just doesn't get why I don't want her around them just yet. He's an idiot like that.

So, that's been my life lately.

Dee Dee - I would love to see a pic. I will get mine up soon. I really do promise.

Cassandra - really wow

Amanda - I'm glad to hear you are going to court. I can't imagine not having financial support raising a child. I'm really hoping we will be able to keep our agreement as far as child support is concerned, if not, you better believe I will be going to court.

Karen - I want to give you hugs. I feel you on the emotionally draining part.

[kadas33]

Girls I have officially decided to go to court for child support. I have been putting it off hoping that he would come around and be responsible but it is just not happening and it is just creating fights.

He is going to be super pissed but I have to think about what is best for Eli, and there are things that I am not being able to buy for him because I can't afford it. I think this is for the best. It will be done and decided and no more fighting. :cabbage:

I'm glad to hear you are taking this step. It's not about you or him, it's about what's best for Eli and he deserves support from BOTH parents. It's not fair that he suffers and you struggle while babydaddy gets away without supporting his child. I hope that it doesn't get ugly for you, but it sounds like you are prepared if it does.


Good for you! Its something I still haven't done nearly 2 and a half years later. Her father has never provided a single thing or penny to her.

You need to do the same for your daughter's sake. She deserves support from both parents.


He has told me other people have told him that Im not pregnant by him. And he is taken their word over mine. I am completely drug FREE NEVER done any drugs in my life, I dont drink and if any one is abusive would be him. I have raised my other 3 on my own since 2007 when their dad passed away. So I know I can do this. I think he is just trying to stressing me into miscarrying.... And now he's not even talking to me at all He wont return a call or text. But Im not letting it bother me. Talking to you Ladies Has helped me a lot!! Thank you for the support!

Glad we could provide some support. I know it's easier said than done, but you must focus on yourself, your pregnancy and your children and let him go for now. Once the baby is born you can get a paternity test and move forward.


Halloween was a little sad. I took the boys out trick or treating by myself and husband sat at our house and handed out candy. Just another first we aren't doing together. My big emotional issue lately has been having to wrap my head around him dating someone. I am for sure wanting a divorce but that still doesn't make it any easier knowing he is seeing someone else. I have been with him 10 years, he's mine...lol But trust me, I don't want him anymore. I'm just sad to lose the plan of a family together I had envisioned. The BIGGEST issue with the whole situation though is that he thinks it's ok to introduce our children to her!! What!?! He just doesn't get why I don't want her around them just yet. He's an idiot like that.


Ugh, that's a difficult situation. I can't believe he's ready to introduce the kids to someone already, especially considering your circumstances.

[EttyBaby]

You need to do the same for your daughter's sake. She deserves support from both parents.

He's actually taking steps to sign away any and all parental rights to her. Which at this point is what I prefer, as selfish as that may be. We dont need any monetary support from him, and she doesn't deserve his fleeting existence in her life. If he wants to stay away then I'd prefer he do that without anything to hold over my head or threaten me with. I hate that I will have to be the one to explain to her about her absent father when the day comes, but its always been his choice not to see her.

[LaBellaVita]

:hi:
I'm around! Things have been crazy lately, DS1 just got a diagnosis for Aspergers (I'm not in shock, just not something any parent ever wants to hear or accept KWIM?). I've been so busy making him appointments, trying to get my Christmas shopping done before December so I'm not in a rush and just the normal daily grind of life! Hope everyone is doing great :hugs:

[twinmom34]

I need to reprioritize my life again and focus on me. I've lost sight of myself and my needs and I need to get that back.

Dh and I had the opportunity to have a discussion last night sans kids. I was extremely nervous about it but went into it with the right frame of mind. Unfortunately it was a complete and total bust, awful basically from the get go. If nothing else, it confirmed for me that it's going to be a long, drawn out, expensive, emotionally draining divorce. Gee, I just can't wait.


Karen, glad to hear it's not us :laugh:. I am a big preacher of we have to happy with ourselves first and foremost. I recommend the movie Drop Dead Fred (it is kind of silly stupid but made me laugh out loud often) and basically reinterated the fact that We Do Not Need A Man To Complete Our Lives! And sorry to hear the divorce is not gonna be pretty. I fear that also.


Girls I have officially decided to go to court for child support.


You and Eli deserve child support! It is too much of a hassle to do it the "friendly" way, court ordered is best!



Halloween was a little sad. I took the boys out trick or treating by myself and husband sat at our house and handed out candy. Just another first we aren't doing together. My big emotional issue lately has been having to wrap my head around him dating someone. I am for sure wanting a divorce but that still doesn't make it any easier knowing he is seeing someone else. I have been with him 10 years, he's mine...lol But trust me, I don't want him anymore. I'm just sad to lose the plan of a family together I had envisioned. The BIGGEST issue with the whole situation though is that he thinks it's ok to introduce our children to her!! What!?! He just doesn't get why I don't want her around them just yet. He's an idiot like that.


I agree with the sadness of not being the "happily ever after" ending we all dreamed of when we got married. AND OMG! Does he not realize how tacky it is to introduce the kiddos to a new woman before the divore is final? Does he not realize that the kids don't need a revolving door of significant others???



He's actually taking steps to sign away any and all parental rights to her. Which at this point is what I prefer, as selfish as that may be. We dont need any monetary support from him, and she doesn't deserve his fleeting existence in her life.


Although DS23 father's rights were terminated, I still believe all children deserve child support. But, I have to agree, it is much easier with the "sperm donor" being erased. I didn't talk about DS23 father, he found out on his own basically that his father was a loser.


:hi:
I'm around! Things have been crazy lately, DS1 just got a diagnosis for Aspergers (I'm not in shock, just not something any parent ever wants to hear or accept KWIM?).

:hugs: You have definately had a rough year. I am so sorry. Not that Aspergers is bad but, a tough pill to swallow. My heart goes out to you. How is the new baby?

[kadas33]

He's actually taking steps to sign away any and all parental rights to her. Which at this point is what I prefer, as selfish as that may be. We dont need any monetary support from him, and she doesn't deserve his fleeting existence in her life. If he wants to stay away then I'd prefer he do that without anything to hold over my head or threaten me with. I hate that I will have to be the one to explain to her about her absent father when the day comes, but its always been his choice not to see her.

Oh, I did't know that was the case...I'm sorry I misspoke. I can completely relate as dd's sperm donor was never a part of her life. He never met her nor did he ever support her. In retrospect, it was the BEST thing for her (and me). My BFF's sperm donor has been an on again, off again part of her ds' life and it has really messed him up. I'd much rather the donor part ways if he has not true intention of being involved in the child's life as if he's not committed it only makes matters worse. And I can understand dreading having to explain it to her, but you can't control his actions and I'm sure she'll see it for what it is.


:hi:
I'm around! Things have been crazy lately, DS1 just got a diagnosis for Aspergers (I'm not in shock, just not something any parent ever wants to hear or accept KWIM?). I've been so busy making him appointments, trying to get my Christmas shopping done before December so I'm not in a rush and just the normal daily grind of life! Hope everyone is doing great :hugs:

:hugs: I'm sorry to hear that things are super crazy for you, that's not what you need right now. I hope that you are able to get the resources ds1 needs and can do so without a fight. We miss having you around but you aren't far from our thoughts.

[twinmom34]

Happy Friday all! Anyone have fun and exciting weekend plans? Mine are ooooo sooooo boring and lame but I think they will be owrth it in the long run. I am going to attempt OAMC cooking this weekend. I think it will take about 6-8 hours on Sunday but then I will have all the "work" done for the month. I will let ya'll know how it goes and what I am most interested in is the cost.

And something very awesome!!!!! I only have 2K more until I have my son's car paid off! All my extra hours in the ER have really paid off :hooray::hooray::hooray:!

[ushxcp]

I'm working on changing my signature, but photobucket is being stupid and won't resize my pic. So if you see this in the next couple of days it will be huge. I apologize. Those are my boys in their Halloween costumes.

[twinmom34]

I'm working on changing my signature, but photobucket is being stupid and won't resize my pic. So if you see this in the next couple of days it will be huge. I apologize. Those are my boys in their Halloween costumes.


They are looking very cute!

[twinmom34]

I did the shopping for my OAMC which includes 20 meals, 2 breakfasts that will probably work for about 5 breakfasts and 3 sheets of pumpkin bars (1/4 sheets). It only cost $153 :hooray:!


The downside...it took me 3 hours! I don't htink it would have taken me anywhere near that long if I didn't have two 4 year olds with me :pokey: but that is my life:winks:.


I plan to do all my cooking Sunday. I will let you all know how long it ends up taking!

[EttyBaby]

Dee Dee, that's awesome! Sounds time consuming, but I also hate cooking! :laugh:

No fun weekend plans here sadly! We're supposed to get some snow tomorrow, so the toddler will LOVE that. I also have yet another midterm next Wednesday to study for. My mom is also coming to visit for a couple days. :)

[kadas33]

Dee Dee, how was the OAMC cooking? That's something I always intended to look into but I'm just too lazy.

Cassandra, how was your visit with your mom? Did you get much snow? I sure hope not, but then again I don't like snow AT ALL.

How was everyone's weekend?

Mine was pretty low-key, well at least relative to how it's been lately. Although it wasn't technically my weekend, I kept ds during the day on Saturday and part of today. Dd was showing in a horse show on Saturday and I figured it would be easier for dh if he didn't have to juggle the horses, the girls, and ds. I went out and watched part of her show with ds. It was nice to get out although it was cold and damp. I went out on Saturday night with some friends from forever ago, I hadn't seen one in about 15 years. It was a ton of fun, probably helped that I was at my favorite martini bar.

[twinmom34]

Dee Dee, that's awesome! Sounds time consuming, but I also hate cooking! :laugh:

No fun weekend plans here sadly! We're supposed to get some snow tomorrow, so the toddler will LOVE that. I also have yet another midterm next Wednesday to study for. My mom is also coming to visit for a couple days. :)


I hope you have a great visit with your mom, my mom passed away 14 years ago and I still miss her TERRIBLY! I don't think I will ever get over her death. She was an awesome mother and person! Snow? Holy Crap! We live in Texas and I couldn't imagine snow in November.


Dee Dee, how was the OAMC cooking? That's something I always intended to look into but I'm just too lazy.


OAMC cooking is complete! Thank God! I started at 1:15 today and finished at 10:15. So, a total of 9 hours cooking and cleaning. I say only 8 b/c I spent about an hour of that making my girls dinner (husband was supposed to but he did not!) and my DS23 also came by so I spent some time visiting with him.


I am glad I did the OAMC but, at times I soooo wanted to quit! It would get overwhelming at times. If and when I do it again I will not do it on a Sunday. I have to work tomorrow and I don't feel like I got a day of rest in before work. The upside is all my meals for the month are made, I have some pumpkin bars to give as gifts to people and I saved a lot of money.


I ended up with the 20 dinners I planned, 3 sheets of pumpkin bars, 30 sweet potato muffins and 24 individual servings of soups :shocker:! We should not be eating out any this month :laugh:.

[newmom84]

Hey girls! :hi:

I went a visited my parents this weekend. It was a nice low key weekend, and I love getting to spend time with my mom. :wub:

Dee Dee the OAMC sounds like a lot of work but also sounds very smart. What kind of meals did you cook? I wouldn't know what kind of meals would freeze well.

Ashley from what I can see your boys look cute! But I can't tell what they went as.

[ushxcp]

stupid photobucket!! I saw this picture huge and it wouldn't downsize and now I see it's really tiny. They were Lightening McQueen and Tow Mater

[EttyBaby]

Cassandra, how was your visit with your mom? Did you get much snow? I sure hope not, but then again I don't like snow AT ALL.


It was great! We're incredibly close though, so its always wonderful to see her. But it was a short trip and I know Bella will be asking about grandma for a couple days. We didn't get much accumulated but theres more in the forecast this week. I LOVE snow and winter, I'm a total winter baby. And it looks like my girl has inherited that. :)


I hope you have a great visit with your mom, my mom passed away 14 years ago and I still miss her TERRIBLY! I don't think I will ever get over her death. She was an awesome mother and person! Snow? Holy Crap! We live in Texas and I couldn't imagine snow in November.

I'm very lucky in that I've lost relatively few family members. My great grandma just passed last year at 95 years old, and that was difficult enough. So big squeezie :hugs: to you! And yes snow! My university is in eastern Washington state and its practically a frozen tundra all winter. Our highs are in the 30s all week with lows in the low 20's. A couple years ago the entire university shut down for 4 days because we were getting more than 5 feet of snow an hour and the plows couldn't keep up and transit buses couldn't run! I did go to high school in Texas though and don't miss that climate AT ALL! :laugh:

[newmom84]

It was great! We're incredibly close though, so its always wonderful to see her. But it was a short trip and I know Bella will be asking about grandma for a couple days. We didn't get much accumulated but theres more in the forecast this week. I LOVE snow and winter, I'm a total winter baby. And it looks like my girl has inherited that. :)



I'm very lucky in that I've lost relatively few family members. My great grandma just passed last year at 95 years old, and that was difficult enough. So big squeezie :hugs: to you! And yes snow! My university is in eastern Washington state and its practically a frozen tundra all winter. Our highs are in the 30s all week with lows in the low 20's. A couple years ago the entire university shut down for 4 days because we were getting more than 5 feet of snow an hour and the plows couldn't keep up and transit buses couldn't run! I did go to high school in Texas though and don't miss that climate AT ALL! :laugh:

Where did you go? I ask because I'm in Texas!

I love living in Texas but it would be nice to get more snow. We get a flurry a couple of days in the winter. We are lucky if we ever get enough that it sticks. And if we do EVERY.THING shuts down. We don't know how to handle it. :laugh:

[EttyBaby]

Where did you go? I ask because I'm in Texas!

I love living in Texas but it would be nice to get more snow. We get a flurry a couple of days in the winter. We are lucky if we ever get enough that it sticks. And if we do EVERY.THING shuts down. We don't know how to handle it. :laugh:

I went to high school in Humble, Texas. Loved my school, but I was born and raised here in Washington until my mom remarried briefly and we moved to Texas. I'm not built for that climate and I'm very heat-sensitive. I can't deal with temperatures above 80 degrees or I am miserable and nauseous! I will never live in the south again! :laugh: I love my 70-75 degree max summers and cold, snowy winters!

[twinmom34]

I went to high school in Humble, Texas.


I had to mapquest that, I didn't know where it was but then again Houston swallows up a lot of smaller towns.



We are lucky if we ever get enough that it sticks. And if we do EVERY.THING shuts down. We don't know how to handle it. :laugh:


Last year we got what was called "a blizard" and the city shut down for a week just to be followed by another "blizzard" with another week of isolation...oops! I forget, that was this year in February. But, it did make for some good ER working hours. :winks:



Hey girls! :hi:

Dee Dee the OAMC sounds like a lot of work but also sounds very smart. What kind of meals did you cook? I wouldn't know what kind of meals would freeze well.

I am a massive planner with my very type A personality so I planned this in bits and pieces until I had it all figured out. But...it is strictly trial & error here. I trusted the people on the internet that do this regularly and some of my tried & true freezer recipes. Although, I made a mistake and am really worried about how it will turn out. I made chicken enchiladas and because of our cardiac health we ALWAYS subsitute plain yogurt for sour cream, unfortunately I didn't see it and had already added it when DS23 walked in and asked why I was using VANILLA yogurt :shocker:, I am crossing my fingers it still tastes ok. Frosen pizza croissants for dinner tonight, DS21 has his first home basketball game of the season. So, dinner tonight...2 minutes at a cost of about 50 cents each :hooray:!

[EttyBaby]

I had to mapquest that, I didn't know where it was but then again Houston swallows up a lot of smaller towns.

:laugh: Yep, Houston suburbs basically. The Humble/Kingwood area is nice, I just can't take the heat!

[EttyBaby]

Well, to the doctor I go today. I can't take it anymore, I've been dealing with this nonsense for over 2 weeks and its not getting better. Mucinex doesn't even touch it. Its progressed to so much pain and pressure in my sinuses that I feel like my head is going to implode, so I'm done letting it take its course and getting some help! Wish me luck!

[twinmom34]

I hope all went went well at the doctor Cassandra! Did you get some meds to start the recovery process? If you came to us my guess would have been steroids and antibiotics...how close was I on the guess?

[EttyBaby]

I hope all went went well at the doctor Cassandra! Did you get some meds to start the recovery process? If you came to us my guess would have been steroids and antibiotics...how close was I on the guess?

I am on 875mg of amoxicillin twice a day with a follow up appointment in 10 days!

[newmom84]

Hope the antibiotics kick that sinus crap in the booty! :pokey:

[kadas33]

Ashley, I've been dealing with my own sinus crap lately and it sucks. Hope you get relief soon.

How's everyone been doing? Hope you gals are hanging in there.

I'm going to a women's divorce seminar tonight, sure hope that it's informative and helpful. I really just want this all behind me and want to move on with my life, ugh.

[twinmom34]

Amanda, how is little Mr. Eli doing? Haven't heard much about his baby milestones and I miss those soooo much!


Cassandra, I am glad they gave you some antibiotics but we would have been nicer and given you some steroids to speed up your recovery :winks:. I hope you are feeling better!


Karen, how was the seminar? Any advice you can pass on to us?


Ashley, how are you doing? How is school now that it is back in session?

[EttyBaby]

Cassandra, I am glad they gave you some antibiotics but we would have been nicer and given you some steroids to speed up your recovery :winks:. I hope you are feeling better!


That sure would have been nice! I am just starting to feel some relief about 36 hours after starting the antibiotics. The sinus swelling and pressure was beyond miserable yesterday, but I can intermittently breathe a little today. :laugh:

[newmom84]

Thanks for asking Dee Dee! Eli is 5 months today!!! :hooray:

He's almost sitting up officially. He's not yet to crawling yet. He will get his legs up underneath him and just lunges across the floor for stuff. He has yet to figure out the arm part. I need to post some new pictures. I will have to take his 5 month ones tonight and get them up tomorrow.

Dee Dee how are things going at home?

Karen how did the seminar go?

Cassandra how are you feeling this morning?

Ashley are you ready for your winter break?

[EttyBaby]

Thanks for asking Dee Dee! Eli is 5 months today!!! :hooray:

He's almost sitting up officially. He's not yet to crawling yet. He will get his legs up underneath him and just lunges across the floor for stuff. He has yet to figure out the arm part. I need to post some new pictures. I will have to take his 5 month ones tonight and get them up tomorrow.

:wub: I'd love to see pics! Some days I miss having a little wee munchkin. I loved taking Bella's monthly pictures during that first year!


Cassandra how are you feeling this morning?

Annoyed :laugh: My university requires a meeting with your academic adviser before you can register every.single.semester regardless of whether you're an incoming freshman or about to graduate senior. Often they're busy and dont have time to fit everyone in. Well my appointment was scheduled for two days after my registration date (today) and I just had to hope my classes didn't fill up in those two days! Then I got a call this morning 10 minutes before my meeting time saying they'd just go ahead and release my registration hold since my adviser wasn't feeling well and I was a senior anyway. Well, great thanks, but now the Ecology lab I need is full at the most convenient time for my schedule! ::crazy:

[kadas33]

Cassandra, that sucks. The university I work for is moving more towards allowing students to self register, but I have a lot of faculty that still want that one-on-one advising session with their students. I'm of the mind that we are dealing with adults, let's treat them as such.

I have a confession. I skipped the seminar last night. I had every intention of going. Left the restaurant where I had met a friend so that I had plenty of time to get there despite the fact that the restaurant had just begun complimentary wine tastings. I got on the highway and it was a dead stop. I got off at the first exit I could and that was just as backed up. By the time I got near the place I was already 45 minutes late. My friend texted me and asked me to come back to the restaurant so I turned back around went back there instead. I do, however, have the information packet they were giving out. I need to pull it out and open it up and see what's in there.

[EttyBaby]

Cassandra, that sucks. The university I work for is moving more towards allowing students to self register, but I have a lot of faculty that still want that one-on-one advising session with their students. I'm of the mind that we are dealing with adults, let's treat them as such.

I wish my university would do away with it. We can always make an appointment with them should we have questions or concerns. Chances are I've been planning exactly what classes I'll be taking for several weeks before the appointment and it feels redundant and pointless to walk into their office just for them to say "sounds good!" and click a button on their computer so that I can actually register. :pokey:

[twinmom34]

Karen...tsk, tsk shame on you :laugh: oh-well, I am sure you had fun at the restaurat!


Amanda, home life????? :pokey: On a daily basis and I think that little smiley guy is poking him with his middle finger! :laugh: But, i am home with the girls by myself until about 8pm every night and they go to bed at 8:30 so, it is not hard to keep it civil for them. But, it's like he.wants.to.argue.every.single.night!!!!! About nothing and stupid stuff! I just smile and go on my merry way because I know there is a light at the end of the tunnel!


Cassandra, sorry about the PITA university but thank you for reminding me! My son is a PROCRASTINATOR and you reminded me to ask him about advising!


I do have another great weekend to look forward to though...husband is gone the majority of the weekend for basketball :hooray:.

[kadas33]

Okay...I confess. I was a at restaurant that also has a bar and I spent my time on the bar side. It was a lot more fun than a divorce seminar, I'm sure. :laugh:

Dee Dee, enjoy your nice quiet week. I'm sure it'll be a lot less stressful with him gone for the week.

[newmom84]

I am bored at work today. There is noooobody here today!

So I am trying to wean Eli off the boob, and it hurts sooo bad. I keep breaking down and breastfeeding him just so I can get some relief. I know this is counterproductive. :laugh: I'm going to have to be strong this weekend and get through it. I feel like I have two boulders on my chest. :truce:

[EttyBaby]

I am bored at work today. There is noooobody here today!

So I am trying to wean Eli off the boob, and it hurts sooo bad. I keep breaking down and breastfeeding him just so I can get some relief. I know this is counterproductive. :laugh: I'm going to have to be strong this weekend and get through it. I feel like I have two boulders on my chest. :truce:

University is closed today so we're just hanging out at home! We're pretty boring. :laugh:

I'm thinking I'll probably take Bella's Christmas photos this weekend since I need to start putting together Christmas cards soon. I also make a large photobook of Bella for my dad every Father's day and Christmas so each one basically covers six months of her life that I need to work on. I love seeing his face when he opens them!

[newmom84]

Cassandra, I've noticed that your siggy pics always look really good. Do you have a really good camera or are you into photography?

[EttyBaby]

Cassandra, I've noticed that your siggy pics always look really good. Do you have a really good camera or are you into photography?

Both! :laugh: Photography is a big hobby of mine, helps with the insanity of being a single mom and full time student.

[newmom84]

Both! :laugh: Photography is a big hobby of mine, helps with the insanity of being a single mom and full time student.

I know nothing about cameras but I need to upgrade from my cell phone. :laugh: I do want to get a camera, hopefully soon, so do you have a brand that you suggest? I know nothing about cameras so I will be totally lost.

[twinmom34]

I am bored at work today. There is noooobody here today!

So I am trying to wean Eli off the boob, and it hurts sooo bad. I keep breaking down and breastfeeding him just so I can get some relief. I know this is counterproductive. :laugh: I'm going to have to be strong this weekend and get through it. I feel like I have two boulders on my chest. :truce:



:hugs: I can't say I know how it feels but I can send you some sympathy.


Cassandra, I agree...your siggy photos are awesome! Do you do photography for others? If not, you should. Your photos are very professional looking. What kind of camera do you have? I got a nice DSLR camera last year for Christmas and I love it but I really need some lessons on it.

[EttyBaby]

Cassandra, I agree...your siggy photos are awesome! Do you do photography for others? If not, you should. Your photos are very professional looking. What kind of camera do you have? I got a nice DSLR camera last year for Christmas and I love it but I really need some lessons on it.

I do sometimes do photo shoots for others, it's always a ton of fun. I really enjoy it! I have a Nikon and about 5 different lenses I rotate between regularly. :)

[twinmom34]

Cassandra, since you are the group camera expert from what I can see...

I probably need to upload some photos to ask you what the problem is but I am going to try to describe it first. I take photos at my kids basketball games and sadly, even when I have the flash on it comes out dark (like a dark orangish color). If I put it on indoor sports mode, the color is great but it is super shaky :crazy: & :pokey:. I have a Canon Rebel DSLR...any idea what is wrong????