Secular Confessions

[3andMe]

I talked to my dh last night as we were both on the couch, about to watch a show together but just hadn't pushed play yet. I gave him a brief summary of something really interesting I'd picked up from this book (Raising Happiness) that I knew he'd be interested in. Then I realized he was emailing at the same time, and I apologized for starting a conversation when he was otherwise occupied. He waved a hand and said, No, it's fine, I can do both at the same time.

Speaking of, this book -- I know it was recommended by someone on APA, but I don't remember if it was someone in here -- is fascinating reading. It talks about how to raise our children to be secure and happy beings based on scientific research, and so far there is some overlap with Nurtureshock (and praise) and John Gottman's Making Marriage Work, both of which I've read. I keep bookmarking little tidbits to share, and I will come back later and share the most pertinent info.

The beginning of the book talks about how there has been an increasing amount of research into happiness and functional families and societies, after so much time spent researching how people and families, etc. become unhappy or dysfunctional. That there used to be a belief in a happiness "set point" and that events could temporarily raise or lower this point but essentially an individual was doomed to have this same happiness level throughout his or her life. Not true, says the author, based on current research. Happiness and optimism can be learned and created, even in adults (so it's never too late!), and while certain personality traits are genetic, twin studies are showing that quite a bit of happiness is under our control.

I'm not very far into it, and some of it is very depressing to me. The first chapters after the introduction are all about how to have a good relationship with the father of your children and how to spend time doing things you enjoy. It also talked about not feeling like a failure if you haven't been doing everything perfectly. It's nice that she doesn't speak from a holier-than-thou perspective, and she talks about the things that she has done wrong. She happens to be divorced, actually. :laugh: But still has a positive relationship with her children's father.

[missychrissy]

Happiness and optimism can be learned and created, even in adults (so it's never too late!), and while certain personality traits are genetic, twin studies are showing that quite a bit of happiness is under our control.
I totally believe that. Heck, I'd have to or I don't know if I could continue on. :P j/k...I really believe that because I feel like I experienced it myself. Going from a depressed/suicidal teenager to an adult who loves life and enjoys it (most the time) wasn't something anyone gave me.

I'm not so happy right now but I don't feel like I can get into here. I still have hope that there's more happiness in my future though and I know it's up to me to create it.

[demigraf]

That was me who mentioned Raising Happiness, I think. Remember that post where I told the story of the embarrassing time I met the author? I think I might have called you the night she was talking to ask if you wanted to come at the last minute. Anyway, since she's a local girl, I hope you get the chance to see the author one day because she's a terrific speaker and can cite a zillion studies off the top of her head.

As for your DH, L, I have to confess - justified or not - I'm pretty sure I make my DH feel similarly belittled when I won't listen to him. He is an extreme case, though. Was called "The Rambler" on the Appalachian Trail. Not very aware of his audience, to where I've seen him turn off other people he just meets with his self-absorption in conversation. He's a good listener atmost of the right times, but he's just not good at reading people's interest. And he doesn't do much editing of himself - like every little detail comes out with little point to it. So he's working on it on his end - after yrs of feedback, andI can work on it on mine.

Jennifer - I'm in favor of any trip. And I think DC is a wonderful city. You should go with them but do your own thing during the day. My two cents worth anyway. I love museums on my own.

[Bridget]

Myles, your dh and my dbf would have a difficult time having a conversation, I think. They'd have to talk over each other.

My bff and I used to do that all the time and still totally be able to know what the other said.
Speaking of her, I have to write her a letter I don't want to write. I have to tell her that her husband is not welcome in my home. He did something unforgivable a while back and from speaking to her I get the distinct impression that she thinks enough time has passed and she can bring him around again. I can understand why she thinks that because I am an extremely forgiving person. But not this time. I am terrified of losing her though.
He left her and went back to hawaii for a couple of months. Oh how I wish he's stayed gone.

[missychrissy]

:( I hope she understands Bridget. Knowing you, if you said my dh wasn't welcome at your house it would be a huge red flag for me to seriously reassess if I'd even want to be with the guy. I don't know what he said/did, but it must have been awful for you to come to that decision.

[Bridget]

It was awful, Chrissy. I could share it but I'd feel like I need to erase it after.
She knows he sucks. She basically told me that the only reason she is letting him come back is that she needs an extra set of hands. She is pregnant with their 3rd child, full time nurse, recently lost her father, gets no support from her alcohol/drug addicted family. If there was any possible way I could let this go and not add to her stress I would. But I can't.

[Cosmosmom]

Actually, I had a question for you, Jennifer. Is there any research involving outcomes in children with dad's with poor morphology? Like IQ, communication, health issues? I'm not aware of anything in the area of communication but I did wonder.
.


Did a quick search and wasn't finding much. I think that except in terms of success for IVF. I think that it's like Christina said that if you do get pg, it's probably one of the normal ones that did it.

I also found this http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/sperm-morphology/AN01305

[missychrissy]

It was awful, Chrissy. I could share it but I'd feel like I need to erase it after.
She knows he sucks. She basically told me that the only reason she is letting him come back is that she needs an extra set of hands. She is pregnant with their 3rd child, full time nurse, recently lost her father, gets no support from her alcohol/drug addicted family. If there was any possible way I could let this go and not add to her stress I would. But I can't.
I don't think she'll be upset with you then. It sounds like she knows what he is.

[Smplyme89]

Bridget that sounds like it would be difficult. I have a friend whose BF/DF is NOT welcome around me AT ALL. Although that was made clear early on in there relationship when he would cheat on her and hit her :rant:

[demigraf]

ITA with Chrissy, Bridge. I'll bet she knows you of all people can somewhat relate (3 children, losing a parent, a partner in need of forgiveness) :( and have her best interest in mind.

:hugs:

[Bridget]

.

[Cosmosmom]

Oh my gosh, I would never even think of going on vacation with DH and not being together the whole time. We did split from my inlaws and sister when the five of us went to Disney together but really all the days except one my sister was with us and the inlaws about half that time. I want to experience things with someone else, like DH or my sister.

I'm not into trains that much but DH is and we hit up a lot of train museums. I go with him and just try to be extremely patient as he takes his time looking and reading things. And he will do things that I want to do too even if he doesn't.

We are just both very needy clingy people and I think that some comes too with getting together so young. I was a freshman in college, he was a junior but really it was the first real relationship. Once together 13 years ago, we have pretty much always been together except while at work or in classes.

Besides, without him I be lost...literally. I have the worst sense of direction and after driving to FL without a GPS, my sister and DH wouldn't let me have the map anymore. Funny considering my little sister does GIS for living and works off maps all day and DH loves maps. I have been living in my town of about 65K for almost 5 years and still don't know my way around. I can get to work and the places I know for shopping or go to a lot like the library. My coworkers make fun of me when they try to tell me where something is.

[Smplyme89]

Jennifer I'm the same way :laugh: I get lost even when I HAVE directions, its ridiculous!!! :crazy:

[Cosmosmom]

And I CAN read a map, it just takes a while to get it for me...where I am in relation to everything else. To this day all my DH or sister has to do is say Macon Georgia when I try to be the navigator.

And nothing screams tourist more than staring for a long time at a map! I did that when wandering around in downtown Minneapolis a few months ago when I was there for a conference and I didn't like it. I spent most of the time in my hotel room watching Sex and the City on my computer! Well when I wasn't doing conference stuff that is.

And I just feel safer with someone else with me....being alone feels like being a target.

[Bridget]

Jennifer, I am like that too. I still couldn't get around the island of Oahu driving and I lived there for almost 5 years. It's a small island.:laugh: Now I can get around Madison for the most part but ever since we got one of those Garmin things that gives directions I feel like I cannot function without it, even when I *should* know where I am going!

Do you guys think it's bad that I'm going to write her a letter? I mean, I literally plan on writing it with pen and paper and mailing it to her. The reason I feel it's so crucial now is because when we spoke the other night and she told me he was coming back, she said they decided to look for a place closer to me, even in our town, so that she could be near me and also put space between herself and her family. I feel before she makes such a big decision that she needs to know where I stand in regards to her dh being a part of my life.

[Smplyme89]

Wow Bridget that is eff'd up! Seriously :ohno: I don't blame you one bit!

[demigraf]

Bridget, I missed your post (can you secretly share on FB?), so I don't know the details. Regarding the letter, I feel like I'm learning more and more that people don't like getting things in writing, like my tenant this week. I know that's not the same thing. Another time I wrote an apology to a friend, and her response was, "Why couldn't you just say that to my face?" I feel like writing is better because it allows one to compose one's thoughts carefully, but for some reason, it seems frowned upon. I don't completely get it. Anyway, in case your friend won't take kindly to a thoughtfully composed letter from you, is there any way you could simply mention it on the phone? Even in the context of some light joke? I'm not questioning your judgment here in writing a letter because that's probably what I'd do, but it just seems to me that it's backfired on me quite a bit in the past. And if you want to minimize her stress, maybe it's better to give her an earful of it, rather than something more permanent that she could read over and over again and possibly misinterpret.

Jennifer - I totally understand not wanting to separate from your travel buddies. I keep forgetting I'm actually weird in the way that I like to strike out on my own, and jump at the chance for alone time. (I'm actually great with a map, but TERRIBLE with a calendar. I can never seem to keep track of what day it is.)

[Cosmosmom]

Madison is a confusing town I think! Course I didn't do any better with Milwaukee and I went to school there (and not UWM but out in the burbs) and lived there...plus dated DH a while before going to school up there. And still didn't know my way around and that was probably about 8 years of being there. DH just drove us everywhere. I could get myself to work and the grocery store and the malls. LOL

I had to go to Rochester MN from where I am now and with my GPS I still got lost and had to go through a lot of "correcting". At some point I was on a road that was barely big enough for my car and a had to stop while a bunch of turkeys or something crossed the little road. I'm surprised I didn't end up in Iowa.

I don't know if a letter is right either. Maybe just a flat out face to face or at least over the phone and let her know to not base anything off of you and that he is NOT welcome to your home.

[AmeriBrit]

Could you meet up with her for a coffee or something like that so you can talk face to face about it?

[Gwenn]

While on the subject of initiating conversation. It bothers me to no end when dbf just hollers to me from wherever he is to talk to me. I tell him all the time that he should come find me if he needs to speak to me. He's not hearing me on that one. :eyeroll:

I was raised in a family that shouted from room to room so I thought it was normal - but DH hates it when I do that and in school I learned it was a really bad thing for two reasons - both because it can be really damaging to your vocal cords with all the shouting, and because if the other person doesn't hear well, the message gets lost. It's the first thing you should suggest in the case of dealing with families who have a member with hearing loss - don't scream at them from the other room, because they need to SEE you speaking. I'm trying to change my ways but it's hard.

DH has a habit of turning on the TV in the room where I am and then leaving the room with something I hate on the television. Last night he did that and then when I shouted at him I didn't hear his answer. So then he asked if I had a problem with my hearing. I said, "I do with that television blaring in my ear!"


Gwenn that is SO scary! All I kept thinking is if my baby has CF I am going to have to watch him die at an early age. I don't know how parents who face that deal, my heart really goes out to them. On the morphology front (I know you didn't ask me :P) my understanding is that the sperm that are "abnormal" are not able to penetrate the egg, therefore I would think it would be unlikely that there could be any issues resulting from it. Plus, my little man is perfect and DH's morphology was worse :P

I know someone who had her daughter diagnosed with CF - actually she was my supervisor for a while and that was just during and after her getting the diagnosis. I was amazed at how well she handled it, but it was still devastating.

That's a good point about the morphology, thanks!


Did a quick search and wasn't finding much. I think that except in terms of success for IVF. I think that it's like Christina said that if you do get pg, it's probably one of the normal ones that did it.

I also found this http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/sperm-morphology/AN01305

Thanks for looking into it for me. I did worry about increased change of a genetic problem but it does make sense that they wouldn't be the ones to penetrate.


Madison is a confusing town I think! Course I didn't do any better with Milwaukee and I went to school there (and not UWM but out in the burbs) and lived there...plus dated DH a while before going to school up there. And still didn't know my way around and that was probably about 8 years of being there. DH just drove us everywhere. I could get myself to work and the grocery store and the malls. LOL

I had to go to Rochester MN from where I am now and with my GPS I still got lost and had to go through a lot of "correcting". At some point I was on a road that was barely big enough for my car and a had to stop while a bunch of turkeys or something crossed the little road. I'm surprised I didn't end up in Iowa.

I can read a map, but I'm much better when I know where I'm going. I've lived in this city for over 25 years and because it's a grid for the most part, I can navigate anywhere comfortably and it's one reason I'm uncomfortable moving - I'd have to learn a new city and the idea intimidates me! I HATE Phoenix simply because it's big and I don't know where the streets are in relation to one another so I avoid driving there.

[Bridget]

Could you meet up with her for a coffee or something like that so you can talk face to face about it?
I wish! She is 2 hours away and neither of us have reliable childcare and we are both so busy. We get together with kids only these days. Maybe I will call her. However, I do know that a letter would not seem cold to her. We're letter writing friends. Always have apologized to each other in letters and had a lot of heart to hearts through letters. We are weird like that. Determined to get along like gangbusters. Her and I lived together for like 10 years, with a few breaks where we lived with boyfriends or whatever and sometimes we had other roommates too. We never fought. I can count arguments on one hand. We squashed any slight disagreements and moved on. I have faith we can survive this too.

[pinkcat1326]

I want to join y'alls secret Facebook page... This is my Favorite thread on APA, I read it every day and feel like a part of everyones lives..... I am personally not secular, but I feel like this group is the closest to my ideals that we have here on APA... I feel like I would have all of y'all as friends in real life....

Sorry to be such a secret stalker, if it is OK maybe I could join in and post more?

[Gwenn]

In that case, Bridget, letter writing makes sense.

[Gwenn]

You're welcome to join in here ... I'm actually not secular myself but I fit right in with the girls here and no one has objected to my posting here so far as I know!

[pinkcat1326]

Yay! I guess it is about time, I was starting to feel creepy stalkerish because I have grown to care so much about all of the ladies here in the thread that I find myself worrying about all of you - and I have never even posted in here!

[Gwenn]

Well, join in so we can get to know you!

[girlwonder]

Yay! I guess it is about time, I was starting to feel creepy stalkerish because I have grown to care so much about all of the ladies here in the thread that I find myself worrying about all of you - and I have never even posted in here!
:laugh:

Welcome! I don't post a lot, but this room is the only reason I am still visiting APA.

[missychrissy]

I was raised in a family that shouted from room to room so I thought it was normal -

We do some shouting from room to room here. Mostly it's me yelling, "DINNER!!!" If I have to ask or tell them something, however, I will go find them. Or text. Actually, now that I think about it I've been texting 'dinner' more than shouting lately because the girls get so far spread out that they're often outside of yelling range. :P


I wish! She is 2 hours away and neither of us have reliable childcare and we are both so busy. We get together with kids only these days. Maybe I will call her. However, I do know that a letter would not seem cold to her. We're letter writing friends. Always have apologized to each other in letters and had a lot of heart to hearts through letters. We are weird like that. Determined to get along like gangbusters. Her and I lived together for like 10 years, with a few breaks where we lived with boyfriends or whatever and sometimes we had other roommates too. We never fought. I can count arguments on one hand. We squashed any slight disagreements and moved on. I have faith we can survive this too.

Me & my cousin Melly are just like this and I would totally write a letter like you described to her if we had a similar situation.


I want to join y'alls secret Facebook page... This is my Favorite thread on APA, I read it every day and feel like a part of everyones lives..... I am personally not secular, but I feel like this group is the closest to my ideals that we have here on APA... I feel like I would have all of y'all as friends in real life....

Sorry to be such a secret stalker, if it is OK maybe I could join in and post more?

Of course you can join us!! Welcome!

[Smplyme89]

I want to join y'alls secret Facebook page... This is my Favorite thread on APA, I read it every day and feel like a part of everyones lives..... I am personally not secular, but I feel like this group is the closest to my ideals that we have here on APA... I feel like I would have all of y'all as friends in real life....

Sorry to be such a secret stalker, if it is OK maybe I could join in and post more?

Welcome :hi: I played stalker for a while before I posted too :winks:

School starts on Monday... I think I am officially freaking out! DH has been my cheerleading and keeps telling me I can do it, but I don't believe him :crazy:

[missychrissy]

Your dh is right...you can do it! I'm very excited for you! I did it with 3 kids, and then had Conner in the midst of it and only missed 2 weeks. If I can do it, you can too. I loved school. If it weren't so expensive, and if I didn't need a paycheck, I'd go to school forever. And this is coming from a high school drop out. College is completely different--it's much better. Good luck!

Oh-and what are your classes going to be?

[Smplyme89]

OMG is it freaking expensive! I'm getting federal funding this year, but I'm thinking with DH working we won't next year so I have no idea how we'll pay for it :pokey: Oh well it will work itself out...

This college does Quarters so I am going to be doing 2 classes per Quarter. I am taking Intermediate Accounting and Business Law. Doesn't that sound exciting?? :eyeroll: I really enjoyed it before when I was going for my A.A. and I am hoping I don't have too hard of a time getting back into the swing of things...

I'm sure it will be hard at first, but it WILL get better. The older N gets and the more independent he gets the easier it will be (so I hope) Have I ever told you I give you MAD props for going to school with 3 (than 4!) LO's!!! It amazes me still that you did that!!

[Gwenn]

Good luck, Christina. Going back to school after leaving college the first time was the best thing I ever did. I did keep going, and someday if I can afford it I'd love to go back for a PhD!

[missychrissy]

I don't mean to brag about it, but rather point out if I could do it in those circumstances then you sure can. I am of at least average intelligence and school was very easy for me. Managing my schedule was the hardest part, but Rich was integral in that. If he didn't step up and pretty much take over with cooking, cleaning, kids, I might not have pulled it off. Or not as well as I did anyway.

[daylilies]

Pinkcat! I remember you--don't know if you remember me--I was KateS back when we used to talk :)

I missed a lot...again...I had to pick up my SIL from the dentist in Boston and I was gone all day. I wanted to say to Jennifer that I have a terrible sense of direction too. I tell everyone I can't live without my GPS and it's true.

Bridget, I'm sorry you're having a conflict with your friend and her DH, I missed whatever you deleted but I'm sorry you have to deal with that.

[Smplyme89]

You should brag Chrissy, I would! :P You are SO right about DH being integral! I've already made him well aware that he is going to have to step up BIG TIME! He helps me out as much as he can, but since he works so late (8-9 at night) it makes it really hard for him to do too much. It will take us some time, but I'm sure we'll get in a groove soon enough. My mom is also a huge help and I'm sure will take Nolan on the nights DH works late if I need to do some schooling. My issue is that I have such a hard time asking for help and feel this "need" to do everything myself. It's the stubborn independent side of me that I have a hard time curbing :eyeroll:

[Ky'sMom]

I also went back to school after being out for about 7 years. I always knew I would go back though. Like Chrissy I just loved it. I also wish I could be a student forever. My professors offered me a fellowship or student teacher position if I decide to come back if they have the funds to support me in such a way so I would have minimal costs associated with getting a Masters then Ph.D.

I am seriously considering going back. I actually am going to go visit my old department head sometime next month after the fall semester starts. I live about a mile from the college I went to so it is easy for me to get over there, but really I'm embarrassed that I haven't been back to visit since I graduated, that was in 2008. I thought I remembered posting in this thread right after I graduated. Someone had asked me something and I didn't answer for a few days because so many people came from out of town for my graduation and I was just beat! I remember aching for autumn to come in here. I even went back to the beginning of this thread to see if it was still there, but I didn't see it so maybe I am imagining things.

But go for it Christina. Learning is a lifelong process. Also if you are majoring in business or accounting there are tons of scholarships available out there for that career path. Make sure to get top notch grades and during your first year be dilligent about scholarship searches. I was in a similar position when I went back. Though I had to cash in my 401K from the bank to pay off some old debt I had to my university to go back and used some of that to fund my first semester. I took out a loan for the second semester but the rest of my time at school was all scholarships. I went to a private school as well that was 15K off campus per year (which is cheap in comparison to a lot of private universities). I got over 30K in scholarships once I started searching. I probably applied to about 200 different scholarships and grants.

ETA: I remember you said you work for a bank. Check to see if they have tuition reimbursement. The bank I worked for had reimbursement for those who studied in the financial or business fields, this included accounting. They may pay some or all of your fees and tuition at some banks.

Erin

[Smplyme89]

My work does do tuition reimbursement (actually just brought it back this year!) I am only "technically" part time (even though I work FT hours :pokey:) So the reimbursement is only $2500/year which does help some. I need to get back into looking for scholarships. I have applied to SO many last time I was in school and never was awarded ANY :headbang: The worse the economy gets the harder it is to get funding for school. Thanks for bringing that up though, I need to get motivated and get on that again.

I really need to decide whether I want to get my B.A. in Business Administration with a Specialization in Accounting or just go for the B.A. in Accounting. I initially wanted to be a CPA, but with the economy the way it is I keepthinking maybe the B.A. in Business Administration will have a wider range and I might be able to get a job easier. I don't know though. Right now I am just taking classes that overlap in both so I still have some time to make up my mind.

[Gwenn]

DH and I went to dinner at this Thai restaurant tonight and planned a grocery trip afterwards. The waitresses all seemed to speak just enough English to take our order and not a word more - I was interested actually in how well they managed with a very specific vocabulary. Anyway, one of the waitresses stopped by our table to refill our water (by saying "more water, please?" - obviously repeating what she had heard customers ask - and yes, I do spend my time analyzing the communication skills of people I come in contact with randomly!) After filling the water, she asked twice if I wanted a box for the two small bits of meat left on my plate. DH told her "No, thank you, we're going somewhere else next." We rarely take food home if we aren't going directly home because the weather is so hot here, even at night, the food will spoil if it sits too long.

Anyway, after DH said that, the waitress very visibly struggled to put some words together and managed to come up with "I wish ... I want ... I wish I travel ... You travel for me?" I gave her a big smile and told her we wished we could take her with us. Okay, maybe I'm jumping to conclusions here because plenty of waitresses will make small talk about wishing they were somewhere other than at work, but I immediately thought of all those women you hear being kept as slaves (in Alabama, of course ;) ) and was about to make a comment about it under my breath to DH when he beat me to it by saying she was probably living in a sweatshop somewhere. She really did look very emotional when she said that to us. We didn't know quite what to do, but we ended up leaving a huge tip - $8 for a $30 meal. $8 won't make any difference and if she's oppressed she won't get the money anyway, but we couldn't think what else to do. I hate that I even thought that.

[AmeriBrit]

Bridget, a letter sounds like a good idea then since you're such good friends with her. I wish people still wrote to me. I don't even get e-mails any more since everyone is pretty much on facebook. Even when my mom sends me care packages, she just sends stuff with no letter. I always include a letter when I send her pictures of the boys. We do talk on the phone a lot, so she probably figures there's no point.

Mandy, i'm still laughing at that Alabama joke. But that is really sad if you think that girl really was part of a slave trade or sweat shop type thing. Omg, speaking of such, there is a new shop at the local mall that sells work out clothes and it's called 'the sweat shop!' I did a double take when I first saw it. That just seems wrong, doesn't it?

[AmeriBrit]

Since my phone has done its usual double post, i'll go ahead and say hey to pinkcat. I'm glad you decided to post. Do tell us more about yourself!

[Gwenn]

Yeah ... That seems wrong!

[demigraf]

Hi, pinkcat. :hi:

Bridget, I think a letter would probably go over well, then, since it sounds like you two have precedents. How nice to have a friend like that. She's very lucky to have you too.

Gwenn, your story indirectly reminded me of the time I spent in Southeast Asia, where the sex trade (some co-erced) is totally just out there in plain view. I thought it was so awful (and I was having a hard time to reconcile that type of suffering inflicted on other humans reduced to just objects prevalent in mostly Buddhist cultures). And the sad part is that I know what I saw was the somewhat "sanitized" version of the trade intended for tourists. There were other, less fortunate girls who serviced the lower sectors of society. I have no idea how bad their conditions must be, however I read in the paper while in Thailand about some girls who didn't make it out of a fire because they were kidnapped and chained to their beds. It's so awful. I'm really sorry if that was too disturbing a story to tell here. Every day I thank my lucky stars that I was born into the "privilege" of parents who loved me and took great pains to make sure I would be ok in this life.

[AmeriBrit]

That's really sad, Myles. Over here, we hear about the Eastern European girls that get sold in to the sex trade like that, but it's not talked about a lot.


A funny from this morning-Travis and I were in the kitchen and I was getting him some cereal. Cash had already eaten, so he was in the living room. Travis had come to the kitchen with his lovey (a blue little cushion that is shaped like a lamb that he calls "pillow.") As I was pouring the cereal, I turned to see Cash walking in to the kitchen....and he was carrying a cushion off the couch and had the biggest smile on his face (as if to say, "look at me, I have a pillow, too!") It was just so sweet!

[daylilies]

That's really sad, Myles. Over here, we hear about the Eastern European girls that get sold in to the sex trade like that, but it's not talked about a lot.


A funny from this morning-Travis and I were in the kitchen and I was getting him some cereal. Cash had already eaten, so he was in the living room. Travis had come to the kitchen with his lovey (a blue little cushion that is shaped like a lamb that he calls "pillow.") As I was pouring the cereal, I turned to see Cash walking in to the kitchen....and he was carrying a cushion off the couch and had the biggest smile on his face (as if to say, "look at me, I have a pillow, too!") It was just so sweet!

Aww! :wub:

[Bridget]

Thanks for all the advice, ladies.

Gwenn, that is really sad and I would have had the same thoughts.
Mandy, Sweatshop is really in poor taste in my opinion. Especially because most of the places at malls probably aren't too far off of that in the countries the clothes are made!

Yesterday I took Savana and Kai for their first ever bike ride in the street. They bike in circles around the driveway all the time and a few times I have taken them to the park where a path leads around and it's totally flat. We have a neighbor who is a grandpa to a little guy about Savana's age who rides a two wheeler really well. Dbf made a comment to me last week (in front of the kids) at how that kid was so good at riding his bike and our kids *should* be able to do that. ARGH! I pointed out to him that I've been seeing grandpa take that boy for a bike ride several times a week since he was on a tricycle. My insinuation was that he (dbf) could be doing that with our kids. He has the time. I mean, sheesh, they need to practice to master the skill!
Anyway, Savana was telling me all day yesterday she wanted me to take the training wheels off her bike. She is nowhere near being ready for that. I figured we could start by mastering hills and getting confident with brakes and steering. Our road has a long slow hill and she freaked on the hill and put herself in the ditch any time she gained any speed. She also went extremely slow on the flat parts to where she'd lose all momentum and have a hard time getting started again, saying her legs were tired. I kept encouraging her but she was just so down about the whole thing and kept saying she was bad at it. :ohno:
When we got home, dbf was in the driveway and asked me how they did. I said they both did great and we need to keep practicing. Savana said her legs were tired. Now I know dbf doesn't mean to be discouraging and thinks he's teaching some huge lesson in the grand scheme of things but he said, "You're never going to be able to ride a two wheeler if you're complaining about your legs being tired with your training wheels. A two wheeler is much harder."
After I got Sawyer out of the stroller and Kai a drink of water, I found Savana down in the laundry room doing puzzles. I asked her if she was ok and she said she just wanted to be alone because dad made her really sad when he said she'd never be able to ride a two wheeler. In my heart I wanted to go scoop her up and tell her she was going to be the best bike rider EVER. But she said she wanted to be alone and I think it's good to self reflect so I left her and quietly checked on her in the next 40 minutes or so she was down there. I felt so sad for her.
We are ride our arses off until the end of summer!
Dbf has all these things he wants his kids to do and be but doesn't put the time in. Grrrrr.

[missychrissy]

Erin, we graduated at about the same time. I finished my classes in December 07, but graduated with the June 08 class. I remember there were a few other 'student mommies' with me but I couldn't remember who. I can't believe it's been 3.5 years already.

Mandy, I don't even know what to say to that. How awful. I hope she was just sad because as a waitress perhaps she can't travel much right now simply because she can't afford to.

:wub: Cash is heart-melting-ly cute!

Bridget-Rich would say something similar to Conner. He's been really bad about that lately and I'm not sure what the deal is. There's a 3 year old that Conner knows that can ride a bike. Conner doesn't seem bothered by it, but Rich had to point out that Colten was younger than him. :( It broke my heart.

[3andMe]

DD has been able to swing and pump her legs for a while on her own, which is pretty young to be able to do it. She's also been highly motivated and we've practiced for a long time because she LOVES swinging and every time she did it I coached her about pumping her legs and guided her to do it, and she is pretty coordinated and ahead with her gross motor skills. And almost every time we're at a playground and she's swinging away independently going "Whee hee! Woo hoo!" a Dad will invariably glance over at her and suddenly decide that his kid HAS to learn how to pump his legs because DD is doing it. And he'll say "Look how she's doing it! Just do it like she's doing it!" And the kid will obviously stop enjoying the swinging experience when the dad starts getting more and more in his face about how to do it right just like that little girl is doing it.

I usually butt in at that point and tell them that it took about six months of practice before she learned how to do it, and that I had to hold her legs and guide them while she was swinging and move them forward and backward, and that I was highly motivated to teach her to swing independently because all she wanted to do was have me push her on the swings but I had two other kids at the playground, and that most kids learn sometime between 4 and 6.

Mylah, when I was in Thailand by myself I spent an evening or two hanging out with some of the bar girls. Not exactly learning the sex trade, but being in the scene. I helped lure some guys in to the bar. The owner of the bar was like WTF? But realized I wasn't hurting anything. The girls were really nice.

[missychrissy]

Hm...I've pointed out other kids doing things as examples when my kids were trying to learn something new. I hope I didn't seem like I was pushing them or acting like I wanted mine to do whatever the other child was doing, because I've never felt that. Perception is a tricky thing though and it's possible I could have appeared to be trying to get my kids to compete.

and :shock: L. I can't even fathom what that must have been like. You've definitely had an interesting life so far.

[Ky'sMom]

I always feel so bad thinking of all the people around the world who have such oppression filled lives. I remember seeing a documentary on PBS about some Eastern European families who were staying in the outskirts of Rome and the family had a 12 year old boy who they basically pimped out to be a prostitute because they said that was the only way they could make any money. The boy even spoke of how he didn't like it but was happy he could do something to help his family financially. It was very heart wrenching.

Christina, I am about to go on a scholarship bananza for my younger cousin within the next week. I will keep you in mind as well. My cousin is also majoring in business and it is well known in my family at how neurotic I was about not ever taking out another student loan and how I went crazy looking and applying for scholarships. Can you write essays well? I found that is the main factor in winning a scholarship. Even when my grades weren't that great (when I went back to college my cumulative was only a 2.61 from me not applying myself back in 1998) but I managed to win some scholarships before it rose by the next semester (I got a 4.0 for 4 semesters straight to bring up the 2.61 to maximize scholarship opportunities). I wrote some kick a ss essays during that time and I even had one of the people on the scholarship committee call me and tell me how interesting my essay was. It was for a scholarship from Foot Locker and I had to describe what I had learned working in the business world and how I would apply what I had learned in future endeavors.

And my DH is in the insulting-kids-makes-them-want-to-be-better camp of dads as well. That is basically how I see it and DH and I have had detailed discussions about this phenomenon and he insisted that him calling Ky a cry-baby or telling Ky how someone else younger or weaker could do something better, would encourage Ky to try harder to "beat" that other person. I think it is just the competitveness of men and in a way Ky is very competitve, but he doesn't like to be insulted, like any normal person. DH didn't believe me that it hurt Ky's feelings until probably about 4 months ago when he made fun of Ky for not being able to do something that one of his older cousins could do. I didn't hear the conversation as I was out of the room and when I asked about him, DH said Ky went to his bedroom to play. My friend was over and told me that DH had insulted Ky, and my friend even said to DH, I bet he is up in his room crying. He told DH about how is own stepdad used to do things like that and how much it would hurt him and make him hate his stepdad so DH called Ky to prove to my friend that he was not crying, and sure enough his face was covered in tears. I am getting teared up thinking about it. DH apologized wholeheartedly to him and promised him to stop doing that and how he didn't want to make him feel like that. It really bothered DH to see him crying like that, you could tell he was crying very hard. I am happy my friend, a guy, could talk some sense into DH and he hasn't done the insulting since that time.

Erin

[daylilies]

I do that too, like when Josh was at swimming lessons I tried to have him watch the other kids, if he wasn't interested in trying it himself yet. But I think the difference is when you start saying things like "that kid can do it, why can't you?"

One thing I personally have to learn is that kids can get over fears or difficulties all on their own (or at least without parents pushing them) For the longest time Josh wouldn't go down slides or climb in those high tube maze contraptions you see at Chuck E Cheese, etc. I never pressured him or anything and one day he just decided he liked it. Now I can't get him out of them, which is a problem when I want to leave the gym and he's hiding in the one they have. It was the same with swimming. Something just clicked that day he started paddling around without me holding him.

[Cosmosmom]

Hi Pinkcat! Welcome!


Count me in as impressed of those who go to school with kids and families. I did it the easy way...went directly after high school as a traditional student. I LOVED college...well the first two I didn't like quite as much but I just really loved the third one that I graduated from. An all women's Catholic college. :laugh: Was there for 3.5 years and if I ever win the lottery, they are on my for sure donation list. I wish that I could have just kept going forever but my parents only gave me 5 years to finish. Took a year off to figure out what to do next....I knew I wanted to go to grad school but was not sure if I wanted to go for philosophy and get my phd or the masters of library science. For a while I also considered sociology. Obviously I went for the library science. I decided that philosophy was going to be too long and I didn't feel like learning to read ancient greek.....I really just wanted to go to school until I had kids and than be a SAHM. Philosophy prof jobs aren't easy to come by so DH didn't like that idea as well either. Now I have found that I really like working and still plan on a kid but not being a SAHM.

But yeah I had it pretty easy as a student. I basically worked part-time....usually 12-16 hours a week on work study. I did some time in the day care center until the director changed and after worked in the library....where I could do homework if it was quite and the shelving was caught up. My dorm room was not huge so easy enough to keep clean. And DH was a student so often when he came over, we would do homework together. :laugh:
Grad school was part-time and I worked full-time but DH really did a lot of the housework if I was in school that semester and we didn't have any kids to take care of....just Cosmo. :)

[missychrissy]

I am happy my friend, a guy, could talk some sense into DH and he hasn't done the insulting since that time.

Erin

It probably helped a lot that another guy said the same thing you'd been telling dh for years. Sometimes I hate that....I can say something over and over in different ways, but then someone else comes along and says the same thing and bingo! It makes sense! lol...Men!!


One thing I personally have to learn is that kids can get over fears or difficulties all on their own (or at least without parents pushing them)

That's true too and sometimes even I forget that. This whole potty thing with Conner is really stressing me out and I'm sure the way I act about it isn't helping him at all. He did admit he was scared to sit on the potty, even the little one, so I have to figure out how to make that less scary for him. The trouble is, I could sit with him-I'm very willing to do that-but he likes to poop in private. Being scared to sit on a potty while needing to poop alone is quite the quandary to figure out. I just reassured Conner that it's ok, the potty isn't scary, and I said that when he's ready to try let me know. I'm just going to keep talking to him about it randomly and encouragingly and try to alleviate his fears.


I knew I wanted to go to grad school but was not sure if I wanted to go for philosophy and get my phd or the masters of library science.
The philosophy dept is one that I support! They're a fruity bunch!! lol

[Smplyme89]

I believe in supporting children in what they do WELL, NOT point out what they lack in. My dad was always that way and I hated. Ignore the fact that I make straight A's was in honors classes and instead focus on the fact that I'm not physical active or good with my hands :pokey:

Erin I write essays pretty well, as long as its something that interests me :laugh: My GPA was like 3.4-3.6 somewhere in that range. I keep trying to remember the scholarship website they gave me last time and I'm coming up blank. Hm... Guess I need to utilize Google! :laugh:

[Cosmosmom]

Aww poor Savana. It's hard when you are not the most coordinated kid in the world. I was that kid and didn't learn to ride my two wheeler until I was 7...when all my friends in the neighborhood were riding theirs a good year or two.

I hope that DH isn't the insulting kind of dad. I don't think that he will be and I will definitely point it out if he does. His stepdad (from when he was 9 until 23) was very insulting...to the point of being abusive. I know that he's not the type to lie at all...ever. In 13 years I have never even heard so much as a tiny white lie come out of him. Example would be I don't see him telling our kid that something is the most fanastic wonderful piece of art he has ever seen....instead he would say something like, I really like the colors in this drawing or I really like how much work you put into it.
I think that DH is very sensitive (though doesn't pick up on hints...I learned early early on to just come out and say something instead of hinting around)....that if I told him he hurt kids feelings, he would feel really bad. He does if I say he hurt my feelings. Or if I told him that he was acting like the evil stepdad (thankfully he's dead...MIL and I hate him and I never even saw his bad side personally).

[Cosmosmom]

Kate, are you in line to get hit by Irene? I don't think that anyone else in here is along the coast right? Chrissy, are you guys looking at getting a bunch of rain from it?

Hurricanes seem very scary to me....not something I have gone through having lived in Wisconsin my whole life!

[missychrissy]

We're just going to get heavy rain. Sunday I think.

[3andMe]

I don't think there is anything wrong in showing a child that another child is doing something. It can make even a routine activity look interesting and fun. You know how when one kid starts playing with a toy, all of a sudden everyone wants to play with that toy? It's usually Dads that get all competetive, though, and start insisting that if my DD can swing independently, that their kids MUST start doing it right away and their voices get more insistent and they say things like "No, I told you, put your legs forward, then back, then forward again. You have to keep moving them. MOVE them, I said. Are you not watching how that girl does it? SHE is doing it! Just WATCH her!" and then I see their little faces crumple and the whole magical swinging with Daddy experience is totally ruined as their Dads are angry and disappointed in them for not doing it right. It's pretty much always Dads. When Moms point out how DD is swinging, it tends to be more instructional. Bleh. It's making me all sad just thinking about the number of times it's happened.

[missychrissy]

I get what you're saying L. I think we've all seen that sort of thing. It is awful to witness.

A few weeks ago I heard a dad spanking his son on the sidewalk. It was a narrow one-way street and his hollering was echoing all up and down the block. I clearly heard the thwacks as he smacked him 2-3 times. I left the parking lot and stood in the sidewalk and glared at the guy. I didn't know what else to do but I desperately wanted to say something. The only reason why I didn't was I was afraid that the father would take his humiliation out on the boy as soon as they were alone. I made my presence known and he stopped instantly. I got back in my car and burst into tears.

[Smplyme89]

Okay, now I'm just really sad :( I wish there was a way for there to be some sort of competence testing/training BEFORE you could have kids (I know its unrealistic, but its a dream of mine :crazy:)

[pinkcat1326]

Thanks for the welcome ladies! I am Briana, have been married for 8 years to Micheal, mama to Helen who is currently four.

I came to APA in november 2005 after my first miscarriage. I think the group of ladies in this thread remind me of how it was back then....Helen was born November 06. We are in the process of deciding for more, but our situation is not awesome right now..

Ok, I live in Wilmington, NC and the first winds and rains of Irene are rolling in...power is flickering...wish us luck!

[daylilies]

Hang in there Briana! :)

I'm still trying to get rid of the mental image of a mom I just saw at Chuck E Cheese. She had tight jeans on that were ripped on both sides right at the bottom of her butt. And she didn't appear to have any thing on in that area. *shudder*


I hope someone cleans off her seat after she leaves...

[demigraf]

LOL, kate.

OK. I lost a few paragraphs I just typed out. I hate my work-issue laptop. The touchpad is just too touchy, and suddenly I find I did something that made me leave my webpage.

I was saying that I am feeling a little guilty reading about the way parents try to "instruct" their kids by pointing out other kids to them. I honestly don't know if I've ever said anything like that aloud, but have definitely thought thoughts like that comparing Bodhi's abilities to another kid. And I'm pretty sure I at least once said something to little T, the boy-who-wouldn't-share, last Sunday along the lines of, "Just watch Bodhi, T. He'll show you the way he shares." I'm also pretty sure one of the parents was in earshot when I said it; I was very exasperated at that point with the way they weren't addressing the "Nyah, nyahs" and was half-consciously criticizing their parenting. Looking back, maybe they'll be the ones who pass on playdating with US after hearing me say that. In principle, I totally agree with everything you girls say on this topic. I know I tend to be didactic at times, and thus a little annoying. I know I annoy myself. :eyeroll: Always room for improvement, I s'pose.

L, I know this isn't the same as your experience in Thailand, but in India at 19, I spent a few days at a hotel helping the owner tout tourists at the train station. Not terribly proud of that. I was very lost at the time, and hung onto anyone I felt even the slightest connection with. I mean, I was so out of my element, I couldn't motivate to see a lot of the cool sights that were right there, and preferred to hide out in local merchant shops or the hotel lobby with people who would talk to me. I don't think I'd be like that today, but I guess you have to stretch yourself with things that scare you in order to get past your fears.

[AmeriBrit]

LOL @ Kate. What an "interesting" sight!

Myles, I know what you mean. A lot of times I come on here and when I read about other people's parenting, I think to myself that I need to be more like them. But it's harder done than said, right? I do have to say, though, that a lot of the advice on here from the secular moms have helped me to be a better parent. Take for instance today, the nephews were over and had brought some of their own toy cars; there was an obvious fight over them, but I kept my calm and delegated the behavior really well (whereas before I would have just been quick to exasperation!)

You guys, I got added to an Expat women's group on FB a few weeks ago; at first, I thought, 'hey, this will be a good way to meet other expats in the area,' but gee whiz, some of these women are just so judgmental and quite a few are really negative about living abroad. Now a lot of them are turning on each other and bickering at one another. I think I'm going to remove myself from the group because I just can't be bothered with people like that.

[missychrissy]

Thanks for the welcome ladies! I am Briana, have been married for 8 years to Micheal, mama to Helen who is currently four.

I came to APA in november 2005 after my first miscarriage. I think the group of ladies in this thread remind me of how it was back then....Helen was born November 06. We are in the process of deciding for more, but our situation is not awesome right now..

Ok, I live in Wilmington, NC and the first winds and rains of Irene are rolling in...power is flickering...wish us luck!

:hi: You'll have to keep us posted on how it goes. I'll be thinking of you!! (I've been a member here as long as you!)


...I'm pretty sure I at least once said something to little T, the boy-who-wouldn't-share, last Sunday along the lines of, "Just watch Bodhi, T. He'll show you the way he shares."

I think that's a different context. Sometimes kids do learn better by mirroring what their peers are doing. It's really all about the word choices and your tone of voice. Dads, it seems, do it more in a competitive, belittling way.


You guys, I got added to an Expat women's group on FB a few weeks ago; at first, I thought, 'hey, this will be a good way to meet other expats in the area,' but gee whiz, some of these women are just so judgmental and quite a few are really negative about living abroad. Now a lot of them are turning on each other and bickering at one another. I think I'm going to remove myself from the group because I just can't be bothered with people like that.
Ugh, that sounds awful. I don't have the patience for that sort of thing either. I had tried to join a parenting forum because I felt I had outgrown the 'pregnancy' phase, but it was similar to what you described. Lots of debating and not a lot of support. It's hard to find a good 'fit' even online.

[missychrissy]

Oh, and Kate...I used to have a pair of jeans that were ripped right below my arse cheek. I was 19 and 110 lbs though, so I still think I pulled it off as well as something like that can be pulled off. :D

[Cosmosmom]

Ashley, are you far from London?

I look forward to being able to talk parenting with some actual experience under my belt (other than my dog or all the child care I did). Course I will be the perfect parent anyway. :P

One of the kids I took care of a baby is coming up to my place tonight! She is going to be a senior in high school this year and driving up with my sister (who calls J the little sister she never had). God that makes me feel old when I took care of her every summer she was a baby up until she started school. She was my difficult child....very smart, quick to try to argue with me (and with great logic!), stubborn...but at least I could usually reason with her and avoid tantrums.
OMG...I just realized that I was like a year younger than she is right now when I started babysitting her! :crazy:

[Cosmosmom]

Briana stay safe! Hope that you guys don't have too much damage and can keep the electric on.

[daylilies]

Kate, are you in line to get hit by Irene? I don't think that anyone else in here is along the coast right? Chrissy, are you guys looking at getting a bunch of rain from it?

Hurricanes seem very scary to me....not something I have gone through having lived in Wisconsin my whole life!

Yeah, as usual they have no idea where it will hit and are showing us like 4 various paths. But nobody here seems to be boarding anything up or escaping from town so I don't think it will be bad.


Oh, and Kate...I used to have a pair of jeans that were ripped right below my arse cheek. I was 19 and 110 lbs though, so I still think I pulled it off as well as something like that can be pulled off. :D


Yeah...she was not that young and not that skinny. LOL

[missychrissy]

Yeah...she was not that young and not that skinny. LOL
:gross:

[Smplyme89]

Stay safe Briana!!

[AmeriBrit]

Jennifer, we're about 2.5 hours north (by train) of London.

Briana, I hope the hurricane does not affect you at all! Stay safe, lady!

We just had our traditional Friday night pizza and now I want dessert!

[3andMe]

Welcome, Briana. I have noticed you as a fellow migraine sufferer.

Mylah, I think you might be reading too much into my story about the dads and the swings. There is plenty of room for instruction in making observational comments about how other kids do things. It's all in the delivery, and getting all competetive and angry and how-come-you-can't-do-this-ridiculously-easy-thing and making it seem like it would be so easy if they could just watch once and do it so why aren't they just doing it already darn it is completely different than pointing out how another child is doing something and doesn't that look neat? You could try that too! Sharing is something we all can do! Taking turns is something two people can do together! Like I said, the moms tend to be instructional and the dads tend to be competetive and ruin the whole thing.

DD has been so sweet to me lately. She said (in front of dh), "Wow Mommy, the house looks so clean today. Did you spend all day cleaning while we were in school?" I told her I had. And then she said, "And I really like that shirt you are wearing. You look so nice and pretty." Dh glowered at her behind her back for a moment, and I read his mind because he was thinking "Thanks for making me look like a chump, kid," and then he added, "Yeah, the house does look nice." I think he might have wondered if I put her up to it, but I didn't.

[daylilies]

LOL! Don't you hate it when they say something sweet and DH thinks you put them up to it...happens a lot around here too.


Josh is all about eating well and living to be all the numbers in the world and being best friends forever lately...IDK what brought it on but he won't eat pizza or anything too junky anymore. In fact he didn't even want pizza at Chuck E Cheese's today-he asked for a salad!

DH once in a while will get a pizza and eat half of it in one sitting which Josh gives him grief about. But I'm trying to diet again, so Josh's attitude is really helping me!

[AmeriBrit]

LOL, 3andme. What a sweet little girl! I'm glad she put your DH in his place! Ha!

Can I whine about my first world problems to y'all for a minute? I've mentioned to y'all before that we're going to have a tough financial year this year because I'm training to get back in to teaching; we've planned to do this awhile but we've had some set backs that have made it harder on us. And now to make us feel even poorer than we already feel, the BIL has got a promotion and bought 2 new cars for him and SIL and they've booked a cruise for them and MIL&FIL next year. They've invited us to go along, but it's just not going to happen for us....I feel so petty for feeling a tiny bit jealous. We always say we're happy how we are in that we see each other a lot and we don't have high stress jobs whereas BIL rarely sees his kids for working so much and is very materialstic....yet, it still stings a little when you see people enjoying nice holidays and things....petty, I know...sigh.

[Cosmosmom]

Oh L that was so cute of DD!!!! Very sweet.

We're having pizza tonight also! I have done pretty well with points this week so I have some room for some pizza. Least I like just cheese....helps not liking the high fat meats like sausage and pepperoni.

I'm so antsy at work today. This is only my first full week in like a month because we had gone to Milwaukee two weeks so those were short weeks at work and last week was only four days as I was having the home study. (hey that was a week ago and she said 5-6 weeks to get us on the books and being shown to birth parents...now it would only be 4-5 weeks!!!).
It's fairly quite a lot of times on Fridays and it looks super nice outside. I feel badly having such great weather when so many are going to be suffering with the hurricane.

Anyone else read the series Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants....there was recently a book released that is like 10 years later and the girls are about to turn 30. Not at all what I had been expecting. Interesting direction it went in.

[missychrissy]

Awww, that was very sweet L. I love when the kids notice those little things too.

Kate-wtg Josh! I wonder where his fascination with being healthy is coming from?

Ash-I can totally sympathize. :hugs: I think what you're feeling it normal. It's not that you don't want them to not have those things, but you'd like some too. There's nothing wrong with that. And one day you'll have it too. Plus you'll both still have time for your kids.

[Cosmosmom]

Ashley, I think that we all want stuff we don't have right now but see others having. I would want to be going on that cruise too!


So, so far the agency has gotten around to putting four waiting families online. I know that others will be doing it but it's taking a while because it's brand new. And of course I can't help to check it out every so many days and see if anyone new is up and compare us to them. Well today it said one couple had been placed!!! And it was the one that I thought would have the hardest time getting a placement. And they were the ones probably the closest to reminding me of DH and I. Gives me hope that someone will see us and pick us over others....well once our letter is officially on the books.
Maybe this time next year we will be at home with little Teddy or Vanessa.
I have already started window shopping car seats, strollers, pack n plays.......

[AmeriBrit]

Maybe this time next year we will be at home with little Teddy or Vanessa.
I have already started window shopping car seats, strollers, pack n plays.......

Fingers crossed for you, Jennifer!

We're currently making a list of all the baby stuff to sell off...lol...getting things listed on e-bay.

[missychrissy]

Maybe this time next year we will be at home with little Teddy or Vanessa.
I really hope so Jennifer. :fingerscrossed:

[Cosmosmom]

Yeah if we got picked right away, I think DH would have a heart attack. Though he said he had a feeling it would be quick. I feel the opposite and that it will take a while. LOL

[Ky'sMom]

I also hope you will have your baby Jennifer!!

And I forgot to welcome you Briana!! Welcome! I remember seeing you here as well before. I always liked your DDs name, very classic and not heard as often anymore. Stay safe in the hurricane.

Oddly enough, I enjoy when hurricanes come by Atlanta, we actually don't get the hurricane of course, which is probably why I enjoy them. They really make us have wonderful weather, not baking hot and the humidity goes away. I remember when Hurricane Katrina came and all those other hurricanes that year, it was a great summer for us weather wise.

And Myles I also wouldn't worry about comparing on swings. I also do comparisons. I was playing basketball with Ky once at the park trying to teach him to shoot correctly but he wasn't getting it. A little boy asked if he could play too so I let him shoot our ball and he was like mini-Michael Jordan so I told Ky to watch how he shot since they were around the same size and maybe he could pick up some pointers. The boy even showed Ky how to hold his hands and everything and by the time we left Ky could shoot very well and had made a new friend. We still see him at the park when we go sometimes and they play together.

And I understand what you feel Ash with the money situation. We were there as well a few years ago. We had enough but it was VERY tight. I kind of feel bad right now because we are planning a Disney trip for Ky's birthday in February and I invited my aunt to go. At first she was like "heck yeah" but she called me and told me that she wouldn't be able to do it so close after Christmas. She even asked me (which I thought was rather strange) if we could go in August for Ky's half birthday so she and her sons could come and I told her no that I had promised Ky that we were going to go for his birthday, not his half birthday. I also think she had ulterior motives in that request since August is her youngest son's birthday. But I still feel bad that she cannot come and wish that she could and I know she is upset about it because she is not used to not having the money to do what she wants to do. She lost her job a couple years ago and even though she got another one, it is not as much as she was making before.

Erin

[demigraf]

L, you're right. I'm tetchy and hypercritical of myself today. I think I'm back to having PMDD. kind of regret not talking to my Gyn since I had an appreciate today, but I don't want to take mess for it anyway.

Ash - just hugs. Completely understandable. :hugs:

[Smplyme89]

Jennifer there is no doubt in my mind that once you are listed you will get picked very quickly. :wub:

[Cosmosmom]

Awww you guys are so sweet. I think that I overthink it way too much. Sometimes I'm like, well we won't get picked because I'm not thin. but than I think if it was me looking for parents, I would never pick a family that is all thin and really athletic....my kid would never fit in with a family like that. We were told that you just never know what will spark the match....but it seems to work with everyone feeling like they got the right kid or the right parents for the kid.

so I just wait....and will probably drive you all a bit crazy sometimes! :)

[Bridget]

Lydia, that is a hilarious story about C and your dh glowering. :laugh:
Jennifer, I think you are antsy at work because your going into nesting mode to prepare for your baby! I am very sxcited for you.
Kate, that's so mature of Josh! Mr, I'll just have a salad.:wub:

[daylilies]

Haha yeah...I have to admit I said "are you sure?" so they wouldn't think I was being mean and not letting him have any pizza. XD

[demigraf]

L, you're right. I'm tetchy and hypercritical of myself today. I think I'm back to having PMDD. kind of regret not talking to my Gyn since I had an appreciate today, but I don't want to take mess for it anyway.

Ash - just hugs. Completely understandable. :hugs:

"Appointment", not appreciate! Fargin' autocorrect!

Jennifer, it must be so crazy when it doesn't feel real yet. But one day it will be, and I am going to be so crazy psyched for you, you'll be able to hear me from all the way in California.

[demigraf]

P.S. The only salad I think Bodhi would eat is made out of play-dough. LOL.

[missychrissy]

P.S. The only salad I think Bodhi would eat is made out of play-dough. LOL.
:lol: that made my night!

[daylilies]

P.S. The only salad I think Bodhi would eat is made out of play-dough. LOL.


Haha yeah, he kind of picked at the lettuce, but just the fact that he passed up pizza was surprising to me.

[Gwenn]

Jennifer, I have no doubt someone will pick you and I hope it will be very soon. I bet you are nesting a little - you should be.

I saw my friend after work today, which was really nice. She's the friend who was really there for me while DH was deployed and had me over to her house all the time to play with her kids and we haven't seen each other in a while. It was good to catch up. She is making some big decisions with her kids, like whether to start her son in kinder next school year or wait a year, and whether or not to have her daughter evaluated at school because she has some behavioral issues that concern her. My friend is a school psychologist and every day she makes recommendations to other parents about things like having their child evaluated or what would be the most appropriate place for their child to benefit from school - but she's having trouble making those exact decisions for her own kids! She admitted that exactly and said how much easier it was to make those decisions for other people than it is for your own kids. Made me think a lot how different it is to be on the outside vs. the inside in terms of parenting.

[daylilies]

I totally agree..it's so easy to pass judgement and advise other people on their kids but when it comes to your own it's completely different.

[missychrissy]

She admitted that exactly and said how much easier it was to make those decisions for other people than it is for your own kids. Made me think a lot how different it is to be on the outside vs. the inside in terms of parenting.
It's true. When I was taking the psychology classes they said it's because when it's our own family we're too biased to see things clearly. No one is immune to biases with their own kids.

[Gwenn]

I also went to the lab this morning to get my blood drawn for the lab work my doctor ordered. They drew four vials of blood! And then I had to go to work and evaluate this little guy who was pretty complex. Between me being lightheaded from blood loss and G dealing with her chemo meds we were a pretty sad pair. Another coworker who has been observing G to learn the ropes offered to help us out and I let her play with the kid while I took notes. She was such a great help. At one point I was trying to get him to respond when I played peek-a-boo and she was blowing bubbles over my head to try to get him to notice what I was doing! I have great coworkers and I love her for that. I got through but had a huge headache and thought I might pass out for a bit but got past it.

While I was waiting in the lab the door opened and a guy entered with two chest high, empty biohazard containers. He went in one door and apparently filled the bins, then came back out through the other door (which was clearly marked "employees only" and a mother of 6 kids was allowing her 2 year old to play with the door knob), almost ran over the 2 year old with the now full biohazard bins, and out the main entrance. Something about that seems very wrong to me. They shouldn't be carrying medical waste through a lobby filled with patients, should they?

[missychrissy]

I really don't know Mandy. I can't remember any rules about that when I worked in the dr's office. I don't remember the biohazard stuff being cleaned when the office was open though so I'm no help. They took care of that after hours.

[Bridget]

Ew, Mandy. That does not sound right. Isn't there a back door?

We are having a garage sale this weekend. Dbf and I just came in from setting everything up in the driveway. We say and gazed out at a job well done when we were finished and then both wondered aloud if someone was going to rob us tonight. :laugh: Maybe not so smart to set it up the night before but we had to. All of us have just been piling stuff in the garage and attic for months now to sell in the garage sale. There was SO MUCH organizing to do! It was kind of fun though. I love getting rid of stuff.

[daylilies]

Hope your sale does well!

[missychrissy]

Good luck at the yard sale!! I hope you sell a lot of stuff.

[3andMe]

Have a great yard sale! Do you have a special treat planned for your money?

Older DS spent the night last night at my mom's house. I told her to take some pictures of what they did and I would have her write a guest blog entry and she made a face, so then I told her to forget it and just take some pictures. Then in 3 hours I'll go pick them up with my two other kids and we'll go to the zoo, because baby DS has been getting really fascinated with animals lately. Our last camping trip had a petting zoo, and he could have spent his entire time there. Plus he thinks all medium-sized animals are called "Goat" now.

[3andMe]

Ashley, I was just going back to find your post about your first world problems, and it's completely reasonable to feel that twinge about not going on a cruise and not having new cars and not have that extra cushion to buy whatever you feel like. Especially when it's people you know who are around you all the time with their new cars revving right in front of you. Still, you are doing something that is going to be to your long-term benefit for a little short-term discomfort (although a year seems like a long time, I know) and you are doing the right thing by realizing your own blessings while still acknowledging your normal feelings of jealousy.

Here are some recent first world problems I read to lighten your morning:
-I can't make a sandwich because all I have left are 2 end pieces of bread
-I'm worried people won't write "happy birthday" on my facebook wall if they lose power during the hurricane
-I forgot I was watching a pre recorded program and sat through the commercials
-"United States" is near the end of the alphabet, so I have to scroll all the way down to find it when I buy something online
-My internet is so fast that when I accidentally click a wrong link, I don't have time to click the right one before it loads the page
-i keep saying "first world problems" in real life and no one knows what i'm talking about
-Whole Foods isn't within biking distance, so I have to drive there. This doesn't allow me to feel maximally pretentious.

I have been trying to decide about getting end tables back in our living room again, after so many years without them. We gave them to my sister when the twins started climbing, and I don't want to get those ones back because they're glass-topped and would be dangerous if a child jumped onto them. However, I think it's time to have more than a couch in our living room again. So I was talking to dh about what kind to get. I said I didn't want to end up with a total hodgepodge of mismatched furniture by not thinking it through, so I wanted to get something that would be sturdy but look nice with the color of our walls and the wood on our floors, and dh replied "First world problem!" I laughed and said, "Are you saying you don't care what kind I get?" But then I sent him a link to the one I liked and he didn't care for it, or any of the others, so now I'm back to the drawing board.

[missychrissy]

ugh-how frustrating!! I'm wanting end tables again too but I also plan on painting our living room in the next year so I've been holding off on that. I tried to get a cheapy one from Walmart just to put a cup on when I'm watching tv, but Conner confiscated it and uses it as a seat when he's on the PC in the dining room/Conner's playroom.

This house is far too small for us. I'm never going to make it a year +. :( Talk about first world problem. :eyeroll:

[Cosmosmom]

Ew, Mandy. That does not sound right. Isn't there a back door?

We are having a garage sale this weekend. Dbf and I just came in from setting everything up in the driveway. We say and gazed out at a job well done when we were finished and then both wondered aloud if someone was going to rob us tonight. :laugh: Maybe not so smart to set it up the night before but we had to. All of us have just been piling stuff in the garage and attic for months now to sell in the garage sale. There was SO MUCH organizing to do! It was kind of fun though. I love getting rid of stuff.

Good luck with that! You couldn't have picked a nicer weekend weather wise for one. :) I always called them rummage sales but up by me everyone calls them a thrift sale and even weirder is the most popular day for them is Thursday! :eyebrow:


Gwen I have seen people walking around in main areas with little hazard coolers and such at the hospital. Sometimes there are back ways we can take at work BUT often there is construction going on and sometimes those are blocked off or it could also be needing to take the quickest route (like maybe in a transplant case).

[Cosmosmom]

So my first world problem....started looking at car seats and am concerned that a convertible might not fit rear facing in my cars. I have a PT Cruiser and a Dodge Caliber...both smaller cars. I cannot stick it in the middle because when we travel, we have the dog with us and she has to have room in the back seat.
Both are paid off and have low mileage so not really wanting to get a bigger car right now.

I think that I will just get an infant seat that goes to 30 lbs and just an extra base so I don't have to deal with it for a while!

[missychrissy]

I had convertible car seats in small cars before and never had a problem with them fitting. I'm very tall too and usually have my seat back almost as far as it will go, maybe 1 or 2 clicks forward of all the way back.

[AmeriBrit]

L, your post made me smile! Thank you for sharing some of your first world problems with me. DH and I have both been talking about it today and we decided that when the rest of the family goes away on the cruise, we will either do day trips during that time or we'll go somewhere in the UK like Ireland or Scotland that we've not been to yet that won't cost us a bomb. I'm pretty sure the MIL and FIL might offer to pay for us to go because MIL likes for us to all be together during vacation trips, but we've said we don't want to borrow any money from them, so we'll tell them no. I guess what kind of bothers me most is how SIL treats my in-laws (her parents). She didn't ask them if they wanted to go on this cruise; they're just expected to go as SIL has said many times before "We wouldn't ever go on holiday if my mum and dad weren't there since we have 3 kids now." (Every time we've been to Spain with them before, my MIL and FIL race after their kids while the BIL just sits back and sun bathes!) Any how. I'll stop banging on about them now. I'm getting sick of hearing myself talk about it now! lol

Myles, DH and I were talking about some friends of ours last night and I brought in to the conversation that article that you posted on your FB about thinking you know more about people than they know about you and we talked for nearly 2 hours about the subject; it was really cool to actually share something I'd learned and applied to our real life.

[Smplyme89]

I don't think a convertible would be a problem Jennifer. You could always get one and if it doesn't work just take it back :)

[pinkcat1326]

Hi everyone-

Power and cAble just came back on finally! In past storms it has been four or five days, so definitely no complaints here.

The storm was dramatic, but in think rather mild. I have a killer migraine due to the low pressure though. Off to read what I missed! Just wanted y"all to know I am alive!

[girlwonder]

:hi:

Glad to see you made it through ok. Hope your migraine gets better. I get those low-pressure migraines too and they are the worst.

[missychrissy]

Glad you're back!!

We had an exhausting day. I did my normal shopping but my 12 year old niece kept texting me wanting me to respond to her. Apparently she had messaged Syd this morning and Syd said she couldn't talk as she was busy. Niece found this offensive and tried all ways to get Syd in trouble for it. I finally got to a computer and told her I didn't want to be involved, just let Syd alone for a while and she blasted my inbox nonstop till I blocked her. I'm so annoyed. Then she texted Rich and Bobbie and Rich finally called her dad then went over to his mother's (where she was) and yelled at her.

Rich & I got into it. He says I'm just looking for an 'out'. My point of view is that I wasn't looking for one but he's been giving me it for 2 years now and I'm just done. He cannot stay on topic-everything is always someone else's fault. I can't handle it.

I also took the kids to the park then went to my sil's house (Rich's sister). I told her what's going on and while she's empathetic, she did have it worse for 12 years and Rich is her brother so I'm sure she thinks I'm sniffing glue. She'd give her arm to have someone, anyone. Ugh.

Oh, and Conner acted up and fought me. He leaned forward in the car and pulled the strap of my tank top while screaming at me. I really don't know how to deal with that when we're in the car. :( When we got home I made him sit in time out but I needed Rich to make him stay. It makes me wonder how the heck I'd cope on my own.

I'm sitting here waiting for the weekend to end.

[Smplyme89]

Glad you made it through OK!!

Oh Chrissy :( I am so sorry you are under so much stress. You are one strong mama that is for sure :hugs: I know how hard it is to deal with someone who won't take responsibility for anything :ohno: My father is that way, there is an excuse for everything-none of which include him in the blame :eyeroll:
Oh I threw a glass at your head, wait that was because you were snippy. Oh that liquor in my "lunch box" when I was "supposed" to be at work, you shouldn't be looking. You told your mother I was smoking behind her back, your just a nosey little b*tch. I threatened your life, you pushed me to it :pokey: OK sorry for my tangent. It's something I'm annoyingly passionate about. I HATE when people can not own up to their actions-it pi$$es me off "just" a little :crazy:

[missychrissy]

Thankfully he's not as bad as that. Goodness, how sad I am for you :( I also hate when people don't take responsibility. We all make bad choices and everyone does it for a reason in a sense, but there always comes a time when you have to reflect and just say you're sorry and own up to the fact that your reason really wasn't good enough.

Rich insinuated he's drinking more because the kids are fighting a lot lately. He didn't come right out and say that, but when I said I wasn't going to live with someone that drank every day his first response was, "I'm not going to live with kids that fight every day" :eyeroll:

Last week Jessica made a bad decision, one that she had discussed with him prior and when he let her go I happened to come across her and intercept. Later, when I found out that he had known her plans I asked why he didn't stop her. He tried blaming her! I was like, who's the adult? She's 16!! It's stuff like that.

[Smplyme89]

Eh, don't be. I've embraced my life experiences, they have made me the stubborn, strong b*tch I am today :winks: I used to be in a very angry place, but DH helped that alot. :wub:

Aren't siblings supposed to fight?? I though thats kind of what they did! Either way its not excuse to be drinking more. I hope the drinking isn't too severe. Daily drinking is a slippery slope to becoming an alcoholic.....

[missychrissy]

He's definitely an alcoholic. It's been going on for 2 years and just getting worse.

I don't think our kids argue that bad. Bobbie is going through a really hard time and is more sensitive than normal, but everyone understands and she kinda has permission to take her aggression out on us (verbally). Rich doesn't seem to be on the same page though.

[Smplyme89]

I'm sorry to hear that Chrissy, I didn't know :( Like I said you are one strong mama :hugs: I hope he comes to his senses and realizes theres a problem soon :(

[missychrissy]

I'm just coming to terms with the fact that he is an alcoholic. It's not diagnosed or anything and I've been ignoring the signs, but really it's clear to me.

[3andMe]

Gwen, I don't think there is anything particularly wrong about transporting a biohazard waste container through a public area, provided teleportation or a direct exit into the loading dock isn't an option. It's not appealing, granted, but I don't think it's unsafe because they are supposed to be hard and secured if they contain sharps and should be covered tightly with a lid if they are not sharps. They are moved through our public corridors all the time. They are around the public just by virtue of being in exam rooms when patients are in them. They aren't carried through our waiting room just because ours is not a through-way, but they are carried among the public all the time. I would not have thought anything about the biohazard containers at all, but I would have given a second thought to a 2-year-old playing in front of a door that someone could walk through and bang into without seeing, and that poor mother with six kids who probably couldn't keep track of all of them at once.

Briana, congrats for making through the storm, and hope your migraine improves.

SimplyMe (I'm terrible at names, and even worse when they aren't listed in signatures), the snippets of your life gave me the shudders and I'm impressed at your willingness to do your best to shrug them off.

Chrissy, just hugs!!!!

I was reminded today that I have enforced sharing! We were at the lake, just me and DD and baby DS, and we had a bag full of sand toys. A couple of other kids came up and grabbed a couple of toys and DD said "Hey! Those are our toys!" and their mom came over and gently told her boys that if they want to play with other people's toys they need to ask politely (SO refreshing!). They were somewhat young and weren't that great at it, but I kind of nudged DD and reminded her that we liked to share our sand toys, didn't we? And she stepped right up and said, "Oh, yes, please come join us and play with our toys. Thank you for for asking." And the other mom nudged again and told her boys to say thank you.

Anyway, it was nice to have a pleasant interaction with another mom and kids, but my real point is that I suddenly remembered out of the blue that I used to tell the twins that if we were going to bring our sand toys along to the beach or the playground, we would have to share with everyone. If they weren't willing to share, then I wouldn't bring them. I remember a long time ago, before S. was born, DD was sharing them with another girl and her Dad told her how nice she was to share them and DD said, "My mommy says I have to share or I can't play with them at all." Oh, the honesty of youth!

[Bridget]

Glad you're safe B!
Chrissy, I'm so sorry Rich is drinking again. I wish your stress load was not so immense.
First world problems really crack me up.

Our garage sale was ok, having it again tomorrow. We aren't rolling in the money or anything but making a little extra cash and getting rid of a lot of clutter. Savana made a bin of free toys for kids and she made sure every single child took something, even if they didn't particularly seem to want to. :laugh:
We had another rough go at the bike riding. She was determined she was just going to "sail down the hill merrily" but she totally panicked and ended up falling before she could put herself all the way in the grass. The injuries were minor but oh boy she was upset. Wailing and sobbing all the way home and then to continue in bed saying how happy she had been and sure she'd been that she was going to do it this time and how very sad she is now. She went on to say how hard life is now and she was she little like she was before. Sometimes I am taken aback by her sorrow over what seems like a minor mishap. It breaks my heart.
Tomorrow if she wants I am going to try taking her in the morning when she is fresh. She was pretty tired tonight by the time we went.
Kai just fell back asleep from waking up to vomit everywhere. I think it's probably from the ton of lemonade he drank from what they were supposed to be selling. I could not keep him from it. At least I hope it's nothing more serious.

[AmeriBrit]

I'm glad the storm didn't cause you too much hassle, Briana.

[demigraf]

I sold my "Wooden Toy Lover's Lot" on Craigslist today on eBay. I spent maybe $60 on the whole thing, and sold it for $75. I still think the buyer got a good deal. She met me outside this park I'd never been to that had the longest slide I've ever seen. Even I got spooked going down it.

DH is trying to talk to me, so I'm going to stop and listen to him.

[AmeriBrit]

DH is trying to talk to me, so I'm going to stop and listen to him.

I giggled at this part of your post. Good on ya, Myles, for being such a good wife! I'm being good to my Rich today by letting him sleep in. He got up with Cash yesterday and acted all grumpy all day yesterday for lack of sleep.

[Gwenn]

DH is trying to talk to me, so I'm going to stop and listen to him.

What a good wife you are!

On my way to bed so I'm skipping over numerous posts, but had to share my own first world problem before I forget to share later.

Went to a steakhouse with my family tonight. I had asked for a baked potato with everything on the side. The waitress asked "sour cream on the side?" and I said that was mine so she set it down to my left. Then I realized it was just sour cream and the other potatoes had everything on the side. Well, the first potato was actually my dad's and since he was sitting to my left, she left it where it was and put my potato on my right.

Since I'm left handed, the potato that I first thought was mine was in the perfect spot for me to eat it, and the new potato was in a spot that was very difficult for me to eat. I complained several times loudly that I couldn't reach my potato, but my dad, being both Asperger's and with an age-related hearing loss and never wearing his hearing aids in restaurants, completely ignored me when I said I couldn't reach - all while my sister rolled her eyes at my dad and said, "Yeah, that's how things go in this family."

Then DH said, "Talk about a first world problem - I can't reach my baked potato because it's on the wrong side of my prime rib!"

To my dad's credit, when I did catch his eye and explain my problem to him he did make space for me and I did get to eat my potato in the end!

[demigraf]

OK. That was a pretty funny story DH just shared with me. He's working this weekend up at a studio that's scoring music for a movie. It's a full orchestra, and he and a couple engineers were talking about the piccolo -how it's such a cute, tiny little flute. One engineer said, "It's like the gherkin of flutes!" Then the 3 of them spent the rest of the afternoon laughing about how the guy couldn't stop "gherkin his piccolo."

OMG, you guys, I used to have a much more highbrow sense of humor before I got married. The things I will laugh at these days...

L, your first world problems are funny ones. I was down to only one heel from the bread loaf today, and I ended up making a sort of pizza out of it for Bodhi and our trip to the zoo earlier today. It turned out pretty well. I think the heel went over better than the "Mexican Cheese" mix I used for the cheesy part of the pizza. LOL.

On end tables, L, I am a huge fan of the Sitcom Furniture Outlet in Oakland. http://www.sitcomfurnitureoutlet.com/ It's a true outlet. The prices there are rock bottom and their furniture is fairly modern. It's luck of the draw what they'll have in stock, but I found a highboy dresser for $200 that I saw on Amazon for $798. I was only sorry I didn't shop there first when we first moved because I would have preferred to get a bedroom set there above what we did end up with. And while you're there, check out the neighborhood, in particular the bldg on San Leandro and 40th. It's the warehouse I lived in for 2 years during my 20s with my boyfriend, a bunch of DJs, a crazy artist (a bunch of crazy artists if you branch out to the whole building), and a dominatrix. That place got so insane, it's what drove me to move back to LA. I still feel a little sick to my stomach whenever I pass it because I hit some seriously low lows there.

Tomorrow I'm going to have a playdate with a mom I met at last weekend's mom club picnic/beach clean-up. Actually, I met her first over a couple months ago at a local playground. She's newer to the area than me, having just moved from San Francisco. I was impressed that she was teaching her toddler son Spanish and that he actually knew the words for star and turtle. So she had to rush off before contact info was exchanged, but I had convinced her to join the mom's club before she left. We have a bit in common, particularly that we surf. Can I just say I'm a little jaded on my hopes of making a new friend? I've had a lot of false starts, and some of them were disappointing. For example, when I first moved up here, these 2 moms bought some cloth dipes from me off of Craigslist, and they invited me to join their informal mom's crew for awhile. I liked them a lot and thought they were cool, funny, interesting and artsy, but I never really "broke in" to their circle. I'd see pictures of the fun family trips they'd all take together as a group with their good looking, hipster husbands on FB, and I'd just get mildly upset that I hadn't been included. Eventually, I just unfriended them on FB, since that was the only contact I was having with them by then, and realized we weren't really "friends" and it wasn't really going to click since I had no opportunity to really dialog with them anymore. So yes, I think this new mom is one of those that I'm going to feel slightly like a dork around, and I'm sort of expecting her to be super excited about me right now, but later disenchanted. That's totally my insecurity talking, but what the hey - this is a confessions thread, right? Might as well give our adoring public something to work with. :winks:

I made it through another week of my "Conscious Choices" nutritional challenge and the good news is that I lost .8 lbs. I'm especially happy because this was DH's birthday week. The bad news ... well, it's not really bad news. It's just so hard to feel like the progress is so slow despite the fact that I feel like I'm working really hard, and the weight I already lost could come back so quickly. Just a little bloating could erase all the hard work I did the last month. At the ob/gyn last Friday, the assistant put me on the scale and then she rounded up... by something like 2.5 lbs. I wanted to insist she fix that and "don't you know how hard it was for me to LOSE those 2.5 lbs?" But then I realized that'd make me seem like a nutter.


"Seem". Ha!

[daylilies]

You guys crack me up!

I just wanted to say everything is still fine up here but internet was out this morning, so it may go out again. If I lose internet or power I'll come back on as soon as I can to let you guys know I'm alright! It's very windy up here. It's supposed to be approaching NYC around now-hope you're alright Chrissy.

[3andMe]

I feel like I really need to interject quickly here that the list of first world problems I posted was from another forum specifically about first world problems. I just listed them. The only one that was actually mine was the matching furniture one. I'm starting to get worried with the semantics of everyone saying "Your first world problems are really funny!" that I may not have been clear. I also found another forum in that same area called "Explain it to me like I'm five," which I enjoyed browsing last night. I saw a really horrific video last night after someone wrote in and asked what would happen if he broke his wrist and didn't treat it.

As a former piccolo player, I heartily approve of the gherkin joke!

Thanks for the furniture store recommendation. I will go check it out. Unfortunately, I'm leaning toward white for the end tables and there just aren't that many out there. And I want to avoid glass for the obvious reasons of not having a child put a limb through it and lacerate an artery (my previous end tables had glass inserts), and it seems like 90% of them have glass. Since our house is a Craftsman and has built-ins and cream walls and white trim, it seemed like white would be okay. My computer desk and all of our bookshelves and our french doors are white.

I was looking at this site and sent this link to dh as an example.
http://www.allcoffeetables.com/HeatherBrooke-Furniture-A6500-200-HB1461.html

[missychrissy]

I remember a long time ago, before S. was born, DD was sharing them with another girl and her Dad told her how nice she was to share them and DD said, "My mommy says I have to share or I can't play with them at all." Oh, the honesty of youth!

:lol: That made me lol. How funny!! I love kids and their honesty!


DH is trying to talk to me, so I'm going to stop and listen to him.

:thumbsup:


Then DH said, "Talk about a first world problem - I can't reach my baked potato because it's on the wrong side of my prime rib!"

To my dad's credit, when I did catch his eye and explain my problem to him he did make space for me and I did get to eat my potato in the end!

:D All's well that ends well, right?


I just wanted to say everything is still fine up here but internet was out this morning, so it may go out again. If I lose internet or power I'll come back on as soon as I can to let you guys know I'm alright! It's very windy up here. It's supposed to be approaching NYC around now-hope you're alright Chrissy.

I'm a few hours NW of NYC so it's just raining here. It's flooding my back yard though. :pokey: The darned pond is overflowing and washing more away. That neighbor better fix it this fall.

[missychrissy]

I'm enjoying the first world problem references. They're humorous, but they've also made me think about what might be a real problem and what might be just a 'I'm a spoiled American' reflex. I didn't think all your 'problems' listed were all yours, but I've been aware of that site for a while and assumed you were quoting them.

[demigraf]

My first world problem: There's only Yuban in the house for me to make my iced coffee with! Blech! (<-- autocorrect tried to make that Bosch!)

[demigraf]

Now my first world problem is that I'm worried I offended someone with my snobbishness about Yuban.

[Ky'sMom]

Okay, I think I am beginning to understand from context what a first world problem was. I am so slow sometimes, it really annoys others who know me IRL but I have always known I am slow in certain areas. So what I am understanding is that we live in the first world and our problems are different from people in the third world (problems like starvation, certain diseases, being killed in a tribal war or something) am I right?

I will have to think of some.

Glad everyone is doing okay who is near the path of the hurricane/tropical storm. Stay safe!

Erin

[Gwenn]

I feel like I really need to interject quickly here that the list of first world problems I posted was from another forum specifically about first world problems. I just listed them.

I assumed you were listing that site. I've never read the site but heard it mentioned before.


I'm a few hours NW of NYC so it's just raining here. It's flooding my back yard though. :pokey: The darned pond is overflowing and washing more away. That neighbor better fix it this fall.

My brother's girlfriend posted pictures of their post-hurricane flooded backyard. Looks like it was really something!


Now my first world problem is that I'm worried I offended someone with my snobbishness about Yuban.

:lol:


Okay, I think I am beginning to understand from context what a first world problem was. I am so slow sometimes, it really annoys others who know me IRL but I have always known I am slow in certain areas. So what I am understanding is that we live in the first world and our problems are different from people in the third world (problems like starvation, certain diseases, being killed in a tribal war or something) am I right?

Yup! Got it. Putting our problems in perspective.

[AmeriBrit]

Erin, yeah, I think it was L who brought up that site about first world problems, which are what you've said above. Petty complaints basically.

Wasn't it L that also told us about that web site called stuff white people like. I'll have to check that one out again for a laugh.

[AmeriBrit]

Myles, I don't even know what that was you were talking about in your post. The only coffee I know is decaf or regular! Lol. We don't drink much of the stuff around here. I occasionally have a latte when i'm out with the British friends and feel the need to fit in.

[Gwenn]

My sister and her kids are still at my parents' house, but my BIL flew back to NY and got home yesterday afternoon. He has a CPAP machine that he uses for sleep apnea and my sister was convinced that the power would go out from the hurricane and he wouldn't be able to breathe because of the machine. I kept trying to explain to my sister that he would wake up if he couldn't breathe and she kept saying, "what about people who get drunk and drown in bathtubs? They don't wake up?" I pointed out they were drunk. I don't know if she believed me or not (we had a lot of laughter at the mental image of him lounging in the bathtub, drinking a pina colada, hooked up to his cpap machine) but really it would be very hard to override the instinct to breathe, wouldn't it? What do you think, L?

[3andMe]

Yes, Erin, it's a problem that we might have, living in the first world, but when you look at what people in other countries have to face, it appears really petty. If we acknowledge that it's a first world problem, at least we are giving a little bit of a nod to the fact that it IS a silly problem in the face of such major problems as starvation and homelessness and genocide.

According to urban dictionary:


First world problems. Problems that only happen to people who reside in the first world.
My GPS ran out of batteries and I misplaced the Ambien, I have FWP.

And don't worry about not realizing what it is. I utilize urban dictionary and know your meme quite often just because I haven't a clue as to what's going on.

[3andMe]

My sister and her kids are still at my parents' house, but my BIL flew back to NY and got home yesterday afternoon. He has a CPAP machine that he uses for sleep apnea and my sister was convinced that the power would go out from the hurricane and he wouldn't be able to breathe because of the machine. I kept trying to explain to my sister that he would wake up if he couldn't breathe and she kept saying, "what about people who get drunk and drown in bathtubs? They don't wake up?" I pointed out they were drunk. I don't know if she believed me or not (we had a lot of laughter at the mental image of him lounging in the bathtub, drinking a pina colada, hooked up to his cpap machine) but really it would be very hard to override the instinct to breathe, wouldn't it? What do you think, L?

You can buy back-up batteries for most of them, and he can still breathe if the CPAP stops working, just might revert back to short periods of apnea like before having it.

http://my-life-and-sleep-apnea.blogspot.com/2009/09/what-if-cpap-machine-turns-off.html

[Gwenn]

You can buy back-up batteries for most of them, and he can still breathe if the CPAP stops working, just might revert back to short periods of apnea like before having it.

http://my-life-and-sleep-apnea.blogspot.com/2009/09/what-if-cpap-machine-turns-off.html

That's what we were trying to tell her. My parents both use one and said if theirs have stopped working, they just wake up. My sister refused to believe that it would happen in his case.

[missychrissy]

Glad everyone is doing okay who is near the path of the hurricane/tropical storm. Stay safe!

Erin

How was it for you? Didn't it first hit near where you are? (relatively speaking) The wind did pick up some, but it's not the 50-60 mph winds they feared might happen. I don't know how to judge wind speed, but I'd just call it consistently breezy. :P Of course it's still raining so I'm really not in the mood to take care of some much needed house cleaning.


That's what we were trying to tell her. My parents both use one and said if theirs have stopped working, they just wake up. My sister refused to believe that it would happen in his case.

She's probably just worried about him. It's funny how otherwise intelligent people can get an irrational fear in their head and no matter what kind of logical convincing anyone tries to throw at them, they still refuse to let go of their fear. I know I've done that myself at times.

My own first world problem is that we have very little data connectivity in our bedroom on our new cell phones. If I sit up I get great signal, but I want to browse Facebook while laying down before dozing off. :P

[demigraf]

.

My own first world problem is that we have very little data connectivity in our bedroom on our new cell phones. If I sit up I get great signal, but I want to browse Facebook while laying down before dozing off. :P

I had the same FWP, solved by enabling the wi-fi on my phone and, when that still wasn't strong enough, putting in a wi-fi repeater. Now I can chat with you girls horizontally. :)

[Gwenn]

She's probably just worried about him. It's funny how otherwise intelligent people can get an irrational fear in their head and no matter what kind of logical convincing anyone tries to throw at them, they still refuse to let go of their fear. I know I've done that myself at times.

My own first world problem is that we have very little data connectivity in our bedroom on our new cell phones. If I sit up I get great signal, but I want to browse Facebook while laying down before dozing off. :P

I have that same first world problem! I can get online inconsistently from my iPad in bed, although it got better recently. :pokey:

As far as my sister goes, she is like that constantly and with everything. I really think she needs help but when she asks people about it (like a psych acquaintance she knows) she minimizes it to the point they tell her it's normal anxiety which is what she wants to hear. So she never does get help.

She still orders for her 16 year old in a restaurant. When she was 14 I was told when B goes out with her friends, she can only get water because her mom isn't there to check the menu for foods she might be allergic to. She has a milk allergy that causes GI issues like mine and is not life threatening. The two times we've gone to a restaurant since they've been here I watched her order for both her children.

[3andMe]

That is pretty bad, Gwenn.

When I was 15 I was on a 3-month tour of Europe by myself. I probably won't be quite that free with my children, but I really want them to be self-sufficient and be able to problem-solve. Although I had my share of difficulties on that trip, I am very grateful for it and attribute of lot of my general coping and organization skills to that.

When we were in college, my roommate had a flat tire and decided she would wait until her dad came to visit so he could change it for her. I told her I could show her how to change it and we could do it together, and she said no thanks, and she said her father would probably appreciate feeling needed in any case. Now, at 41, she still doesn't have a real job and is living with someone her father's age who is paying for her rent and living expenses.

[Ky'sMom]

How was it for you? Didn't it first hit near where you are? (relatively speaking) The wind did pick up some, but it's not the 50-60 mph winds they feared might happen. I don't know how to judge wind speed, but I'd just call it consistently breezy. :P Of course it's still raining so I'm really not in the mood to take care of some much needed house cleaning.



We got nothing here except low humidity. We rarely get the effects of hurricanes in N Central GA unless they come from the south, like from the gulf or something. During Katrina and Dennis and another one I think right after Dennis though years ago we got a bunch of rain and the tropical depression storm. Lots of downed trees, but nothing this time. It was pretty nice outside, that's it.

I know even the rain from the storms can be devastating. My old boss at the bank I used to work for during Dennis had his house detroyed by the rains and flooding. Because we aren't in a flood zone he didn't have flood insurance and had just bought the house a month previously. He had to take out a loan to build the house all over again.

Erin

[Smplyme89]

L thanks for that. I guess I always just remember that someone out there has/had it worse than me. Plus, it gives me alot of insight what NOT to do when raising N. :winks: I am horrible with names too! I need to add my name back into my siggy again (Christina) :hi:

OK I am SO glad you ladies explained the first world problem. I was SO lost and a little embarassed to say so :shame:

[missychrissy]

I had the same FWP, solved by enabling the wi-fi on my phone and, when that still wasn't strong enough, putting in a wi-fi repeater. Now I can chat with you girls horizontally. :)

Funny 'cause I've already been researching them online. :P Fully in the plan of things to do!!

Mandy-that's terrible about your niece. What the heck does her mom think she'd do if something happened to her? And does she plan on making all her decisions for her the rest of her life?

I guess I am aware of some people that have to talk to their adult children each and every day and they never hesitate to give their opinion about what they think they ought to do in any given scenario. I always wonder how those adult children can tolerate it. I'll discuss things with my parents, but unless I specifically say, "What do you think I should do?" I don't want them telling me what to do. With my dad, if I asked him he'd answer, "That's up to you." anyway!


I know even the rain from the storms can be devastating. My old boss at the bank I used to work for during Dennis had his house detroyed by the rains and flooding. Because we aren't in a flood zone he didn't have flood insurance and had just bought the house a month previously. He had to take out a loan to build the house all over again.

Erin

Oh how awful! My opinion is flood insurance should be included at least at a basic level for all homeowner's insurance. One never knows when a house could get flooded.

[Bridget]

OMFG She did it! Savana made it down the hill without falling!:hooray:
Pedal,brake. Pedal, brake. Pedal. brake.

Oh if y'all could have seen her. When we got to the flat part she was pedaling like crazy and siging her little heart out!!:wub:

[missychrissy]

:bounce::clap::cabbage::hooray:

Wonderful Bridget!!!! It really didn't take that long once you two focused on it. She should be so proud of herself!!!

[Ky'sMom]

So happy for her!!!! That is so great and I bet she was so proud!

Erin

[Gwenn]

Go, Savana! That's awesome!

[girlwonder]

:hooray::cabbage::hooray::cabbage::hooray:

[demigraf]

OMFG She did it! Savana made it down the hill without falling!:hooray:
Pedal,brake. Pedal, brake. Pedal. brake.

Oh if y'all could have seen her. When we got to the flat part she was pedaling like crazy and siging her little heart out!!:wub:

Super awesome!!! :thumbsup: That must have felt amazing for BOTH of you.

[demigraf]

L, I have to confess that even though it registered with me earlier today that those first world problems you listed weren't yours, I still had a mild panic moment doing dishes tonight over the fact that I never got around to wishing you a happy birthday today.
:lol:

ETA: On the end table front, I still have to do a mosaic on the table top of a secondhand end table I got specifically for that project. If you ever feel like doing the same thing, I could show you how (if you don't already know) and we could do the project together. It would be good motivation for me to start on that project. Plenty of white tile out there for your table. I actually have to do the end table AND a coffee table.

[AmeriBrit]

That's awesome, Bridget!

Myles, i'm jealous you live so close to L! Why don't y'all come over to London and we'll have a secular convention? :)

[AmeriBrit]

Dp

[missychrissy]

L, I have to confess that even though it registered with me earlier today that those first world problems you listed weren't yours, I still had a mild panic moment doing dishes tonight over the fact that I never got around to wishing you a happy birthday today.
:lol:

L, it's your birthday? Have a happy one!!


That's awesome, Bridget!

Myles, i'm jealous you live so close to L! Why don't y'all come over to London and we'll have a secular convention? :)
Wait for me!!!

Here's to a happy week, huh? :P I really need one.

[3andMe]

Chrissy, my birthday is on Valentine's Day. Mylah was panicking momentarily because that was one of the first world problems on the list (about not being able to get birthday wishes because of the hurricane), even though I keep claiming that those aren't my particular problems.

Mylah, I have done mosaic on table tops before. Here is the beginning of one I did for my balcony in my condo, to go with my red deck chairs. I actually really enjoyed it, and have thought from time to time about doing it again, but I don't ever have that kind of time in a well-ventilated area away from the children. I wish I'd taken a picture of it when it was done.


http://i109.photobucket.com/albums/n70/lydchapman/IM000932.jpg

[missychrissy]

D'oh, I got it now. Man I can be slow sometimes!! :lol: Oh my goodness!!

[AmeriBrit]

I forgot to mention to y'all about the other day. The family (that's me, DH, our 2 boys, FIL, MIL, BIL, SIl and their 3 kids) went to an old estate to walk around the gardens and just have a nice day in the sun. Any how, near the end of the day, the boys were running around out in the big open orchards. There were benches for people to sit on and picnic tables, too. We'd ordered scones as a treat, so as the adults finished up, all the boys went racing around (including Cash who thought it was hysterical trying to chase the older boys). My FIL and DH went and chased the boys a bit and interacted with them. My BIL sat there with his Prada sunglasses on with his arms crossed and just watched. I said to SIL, "Does BIL not exercise much these days?" She sort of laughed and said, "Can't you tell with that belly of his?" So, she called him over and told him he should be running around with the boys....and his response was, "I'm not going to run around with all these people sitting around watching me." I just thought to myself, 'wow, he'd rather protect his businessman image than play with his kids.' No wonder their 2 boys don't listen to him!

Any how, that's my rant of the day. I told SIL there was no way we'd be able to afford the cruise next year and my MIL actually said, "I wish there was some way like maybe if you could work in the kitchen while on the cruise to pay your way." LOL. Some times the woman makes me laugh with the silly things she says. She didn't mean it in a malicious way; she is quite "simple" in the things she says a lot of times. I told her the only way we'd be able to go is if we tied a little row boat to the side of the ship and sailed along side them. Bwahaha.

[demigraf]

That's funny. M'be you could go tandem - you on waterskis and DH on a raft. That way you could take turns when one of you gets tired. Do you enjoy cruises? To be honest, I'd much prefer to be staying put and exploring one region. I find them a little claustrophobic. You'd probably find me on one of those rafts! Talk about wakeboarding!

L, ooooh, shiny! Do you still have that table? Do you still have your condo for that matter? I'm not sure I ever shared this in here, so forgive if this is a repeat, but this is the mosaic work I did on our patio at the house down in Southern Cali. It took 2 years, and I thought it would only take a couple of weekends!!! Bwahahahaha!!

http://www.flickr.com/photos/luluwaggytail/sets/72157600367183276/

[missychrissy]

:laugh: Ash! That soooo sounds like something my maternal grandmother would say too!

And :shock: oh my goodness Myles. That's gorgeous! I'm in awe! I can't believe you thought it would only take a weekend though! I'm glad you shared it because if you did previously, I missed it.

[Bridget]

:laugh: I cannot believe your mil said that! Hilarious. I love that you are able to laugh and shrug it off. Sometimes old ladies are just goofy and that is what I have figured out with dbf's mom too and I don't let the things she says bother me. I know she means no harm.

Speaking of vacations. My dad just got back from going to Disney world with my older brother and his 4 kids. After talking to my dad I told dbf that I don't care to ever bring my kids there. If they really want to go of course I will consider it but it just seems like those places are so stressful. You have to go ALL day to make it worth your time and money and it's so much waiting and junk food and usually really hot. I'd rather take my kids to the ocean and skip the craziness.

[missychrissy]

I'd take my kids but the girls are much older and I think we could manage to have a good time. That's only based on our experience at Cedar Point (in Ohio) last year. My sil, niece, Sydney and I hung out all day, the teen girls (my 2 oldest daughters and sil's oldest daughter) stayed to themselves, and Rich took Conner. Rich isn't into rides at all so he didn't mind staying in the kiddie section with him. When Conner got tired, Rich took him back to camp and started dinner.

I can't imagine it being much fun if they were all little though.

[Ky'sMom]

I am soooooooooo jealous that you went to Cedar Point last year. I used to go every year when I was a kid and loved it but thought that once I left Ohio I would go to much better theme parks. I was sorely disappointed and haven't found any yet that surpasses Cedar Point in my eyes. They have great coasters and I just love that place. DH has never been so I may plan a trip there in a couple years.

We are going to Disney for Ky's 10th birthday. I have never been and don't feel that it hindered me in anyway in my childhood. Even with all the crap I went through as a kid I still think I had a fun childhood because I did and all without any amusement parks except Cedar Point and we only went there because my mom got $5 tickets from her job. I will admit though I yearned to go to Epcot center because way back in like 85 Michael Jackson did some special movie that only played at Epcot and I so wanted to go when I was 6 or 7 LOL. I used to wonder what the movie was like and my brother and I would act out imaginary scenes. I wonder if they still have the movie there?

I already think Disney won't be worth the money but it is something that Ky wants to go see and I can afford it so I figure he can go once in his childhood. I may take Elle when she turns 10 as well and Ky said he hopes so because then he will get to go again.

It is way to freaking expensive though. Ky wants to go the Magic Kingdom and one of the parks at Universal Studios and each one of them is nearly $100 for each person even those 3 and up are $90 so I would have to pay that much for Elle too. I figure I will just tell them she is 2 though and cross my fingers and hope nothing horrible happens to me because I just cannot see paying $100 for her to go to an amusement park when I know she won't do hardly anything but hang out with MIL. The parks costs more than a 4 bedroom house for the week though. It is ridiculous. And I just found out from my cousin (which I hope is not true) that they do not allow you to bring in any outside food. When we went to Cedar Point we always brought our own food or we got a stamp on our hand and went out to the car for lunch, which we brought in coolers. It is just all to much for a frugal gal like me and I wish I hadn't told him we were going otherwise we wouldn't go just because I know it will more than likely be boring to me.

Erin

[Gwenn]

Erin, I went to Disneyland once as a child because my aunt planned a trip and convinced my parents to go. My dad is a lot like you and I think the prices made him wince the whole time. I went again a few years ago when we went to LA for a wedding. It's actually a neat place - but they price gouge horribly. Everything is ridiculously overpriced, but I do think you'll enjoy yourself.

When I went to FL last year for DH's yellow ribbon thingie it was at one of the Disney hotels. I'd never stayed in one before because my dad would never have paid for one. This one was on the military's dime so we paid nothing. It was very neat, but everything was fake. It was like a computer generated version of reality, not real life. We were right next to Epcott but we were too broke to afford tickets so we just walked around outside. I would like to go to Epcott someday but that wasn't the time.

[Cosmosmom]

Speaking of vacations. My dad just got back from going to Disney world with my older brother and his 4 kids. After talking to my dad I told dbf that I don't care to ever bring my kids there. If they really want to go of course I will consider it but it just seems like those places are so stressful. You have to go ALL day to make it worth your time and money and it's so much waiting and junk food and usually really hot. I'd rather take my kids to the ocean and skip the craziness.

Oh No! I love love love Disneyworld. Best vacation I have ever had and I cannot wait to take our child there (course it would be only one and not three or four!). I want to go when toddler age and again later once tall enough for all the rides.
My parents first took us when I was 7 and my sister was 2 and I don't think that it was stressful at all. Course they had a lot less parks back than!
what we did when we went in 2006 was planned it for a week trip and just knew that we were not going to see and do everything. Granted we were all adults but I can be a bit of PITA on vacation getting tired and hungry. What we did was eat breakfast at the house....we rented a house with a pool about 1.5 miles away and ate lunch at the park. Sometimes dinner or sometimes dinner at the house.
And biggest thing of all was NOT going in the summer. We did end of April and even that was a bit hotter than I would have liked. Next time will be early April I think. Great weather plus the lines moved very quickly and there was interesting stuff to do a lot when in line to see. Very different from Six Flags!

[Cosmosmom]

Erin, I didn't think that the food prices were too bad. They do not let you bring in food. I even had to buy my water bottle for the day there but really it was MUCH cheaper for us to get food there than it was in Vegas on the strip or when I have gone to places like NYC. And being so hot out, I was shocked at how cheap the water was. I also thought parking was really pretty reasonable.

The worst was when we ate at the Italian restaurant in Epcot...and my sister ordered a plate of plain noodles (no sauce at all) and it was $13. I have that receipt in my scrapbook from the trip! LOL At least they were VERY good noodles.

But when I do travel, I don't eat all that much because I don't want to spend the vacation in the bathroom or feeling sick.

[Gwenn]

When we were at the Disney hotel near Epcott, and DH and I had very little money, we found it extremely difficult to eat on a budget, and that wasn't just the restaurant in the hotel but all the restaurants along the boardwalk nearby where everything was run by Disney. I thought everything was overpriced.

[demigraf]

I remember when kids were $11 @ Disneyland. It's a shame they hyped it up to be inaccessible to so many people, since kids really do love it. Well, I think they might still do "local residents $40 for 2 parks" if you show ID a couple months out of the year, but then there's parking and other add-ons.. I have quite a few friends who grew up in Orange County and took jobs at Disneyland every summer. Some of the stories... just be wary of letting your kids hug one of the costumed "cast members" (that's what they call the people walking around dressed up as characters). There was a funny article about how the guy who dresses up like Jack Sparrow has a following of groupie moms and he gets A LOT of action. Lol. We are planning to take Bodhi next spring, as my cousin's wife works for Disney and gets free tix, Pixar DVDs etc. Come to think of it, I worked for them (their video game division) for a day before I left for a better offer. I totally forgot about that. Ha!

[missychrissy]

Doesn't Disney have some packages that include meals? I've researched them and saw one where we could have stayed 4 nights, including meals, for under $6,000. Maybe it was a deal of the century (it was a couple years ago) but I thought that was a good price for a family of 6.

[Bridget]

Good morning all. Chrissy, why the sleepless night? Saw it on facebook. Hope everything is ok.
I really need to change my sleeping arrangement. Right now I'm between Savana and Sawyer on a mattress on the floor and it's getting worse every nice. Everyone is getting bigger (except me thank goodness) and I'm getting whacked in the face and kicked everywhere all night long. Plus with my headache/neck issues I just can't sleep any old way. I have to do some brainstorming here.
Over the next couple of weeks my daycare is going to be full to the max. Like, people taking even the random spots I have open during the week. That is great for us but I'm not going to lie, I have really enjoyed these few weeks of just me and my kids. I have this one last week where I'm just taking care of one baby part time and then back to long crazy days!

[Bridget]

Oh and I didn't even factor in the cost of Disney in my thoughts of never wanting to go there. Boy could I think of better things to spend that money on!
We are safe so far. When dbf sent a picture of him with Mickey and Minnie while he was in NY, the kids said, "Who is THAT?":laugh:

[missychrissy]

I hope you can figure out a sleeping arrangement that gives you some relief Bridget. I honestly don't know how you do it. I bet it was awfully nice having just your kids for a while. :wub:

I haven't slept well in weeks. I have too many ruminating thoughts. I'm really going to have to go to the dr. Today isn't so bad, but yesterday I felt sick/anxious all day long. I'm not sick-sick. It's purely nerves. The bright side is I've lost another 5 lbs :P

Erin-I forgot to mention that we did the same thing at Cedar Point with our food. We left it in coolers in our cars and went out to the parking to to eat. The one drawback on that entire day was we didn't know it had to be a certain arm that had to be stamped and the gate keeper kid actually grabbed my sil roughly and jerked her hand to him. I actually stopped and yelled at him for that. She wouldn't have said anything. I was very tired at that point and had hungry kids or I would have demanded to talk to his manager. Something tells me he won't ever do that again though 'cause he totally had the deer-in-the-headlights look on his face.

[Smplyme89]

I am actually hoping that I can take my mom to Disney World for her bday next year. She's never been and LOVES Mickey Mouse. I went once when I was younger with a church that I went too. I was one of those charity cases who couldn't afford to pay for the ticket :eyeroll: It was fun, we went around July 4th so they had a really awesome parade with fireworks, it was really neat :) I'm cheap though and don't want to spend that much money to go back :laugh:

[Smplyme89]

Bridget I hope you find a sleeping arrangement that works for you :hugs: It sounds like you are going to be super busy in the coming weeks!

Chrissy I am sorry your so stressed. :hugs:

Classes only started yesterday and I'm freaking out already :eyeroll: I have assignments due on Thursday and have NO clue WTH I am doing :headbang:

[missychrissy]

It will get easier Christina. Don't focus on everything that has to be done, but rather break it up into manageable bits. You'll get it done! And it'll be easier that way too.

[3andMe]

Mylah, those mosaics were incredible. I had never seen them before, and I can see them taking years to do.

Dh and I have both been to Disneyland several times as kids, and have no desire to return. I will do it if I have to, but we both feel like if they get to go on a school trip, or with a friend's family, we'll be more than happy to let them go then so we can get out of it. I get "It's a Small World" stuck in my head just writing about it. Argh, all day now, repeating jangly tune.

I'm at work today. Everyone had fevers yesterday, so my planned special trip to Children's Fairyland for the members-only event was canceled, but the twins were so awesome. They spent pretty much all day playing together, one game after another. They pretended to be camping, then airplanes, then color kittens, then construction site. They were so good! Baby S. was involved sometimes. We did some painting and stuff, but mostly I felt like I was interfering when I did an activity.

Dh came home and they were swooping around like crazy, and he said "I think it's a mistake to give them cocaine this close to bedtime." I replied, "Sorry, I guess I just misjudged the dose. I didn't want them to be all listless when you got here." and he laughed.

[missychrissy]

Dh came home and they were swooping around like crazy, and he said "I think it's a mistake to give them cocaine this close to bedtime." I replied, "Sorry, I guess I just misjudged the dose. I didn't want them to be all listless when you got here." and he laughed.
:laugh: I love that sort of banter!

[Smplyme89]

Dh came home and they were swooping around like crazy, and he said "I think it's a mistake to give them cocaine this close to bedtime." I replied, "Sorry, I guess I just misjudged the dose. I didn't want them to be all listless when you got here." and he laughed.

:lol: L this had me cracking up! :lol:

Thanks Chrissy, I am just doubting myself so much and I really need to stop it. It's not helping anything :truce: "I think I can, I think I can" :winks:

[missychrissy]

Of course you can do it. When I was doing it, I had to have a little calendar and I would set aside blocks of 1-2 hour timeslots and fill in which assignment (or section of assignment) I would work on during that time. It helped a lot.

[Smplyme89]

Thats a good idea! It's so hard to really schedule anything since DH schedule is all crazy. Some days he's home by 6 others its after 9 :headbang: I brought one of my books with me today to work (the one that feels the most challenging) and plan on doing some reading on my pump breaks. Figured I might as well do something productive while I'm sitting there for 30mins. :laugh: After this week I think it'll be a little easier. It's just not knowing the assignment til Monday and having to have it done by Thursday is a little intimidating. After this week at least I should know the assignments ahead of time and be able to work on it over the weekend.

[missychrissy]

That will definitely help! I did most my schoolwork on weekends as well.

And using your pump break to read/study is also a good utilization of time. I returned to college when Conner was 2 weeks old. School was roughly 50 minutes from my home and I used to pump while driving :P

[Smplyme89]

:laugh: Now thats talent Chrissy!

[missychrissy]

Mommas can be very resourceful. :D

[Cosmosmom]

Oh I hated at the beginning of a term you didn't have a first weekend to do that first assignment. I liked doing homework on weekends mostly too.


I didn't think that our disney trip was too bad....about 2K for two adults and we were gone 10 days. We drove from WI to FL so there was gas and one hotel each way. We had my sister with us so she paid 1/3 and we did 2/3 of that. The house was a week and was $150 a night since wasn't peak season yet and we split that five ways (DH, me, my sister, my MIL and her DH). Two tickets...we did the 5 days of those and added the park hopper option. And we also saw the Cirque du Soleil show there.
Getting the house was the best thing ever. Even had a private screened in pool. My MIL said she would have been happy to just hang out at the house for a week by the pool.
I think that next time we go we will need a 4-5 bedroom house again (comes with usually 3-4 bathrooms). I'm sure that my sister will want to go, my parents will want to go and my MIL will want to go. When you split the cost of the house with that many other people.....it helps a LOT with price.

Dh wants to wait until our kid is old enough to remember the trip. But I think that I will be able to talk him into going as a toddler and again when older. The toddler trip will be for us to see the and remember. :)

[missychrissy]

Conner was 2.5 when we went to AZ and he remembers a lot about it. It's really shocking, actually. He will often bring up flying on an airplane to see his best friend Mikey (ShannonG's son). He even makes motions with his arm to show how the plane bounced due to turbulence!

[3andMe]

Bridget, I forgot to say how proud I was of Savana, reading about her riding her bike. I got a tear in my eye! I keep peeking in here and then forgetting to post about what I read.

[Cosmosmom]

I keep peeking in here and then forgetting to post about what I read.

I do that too! I might read it quickly at night but usually post during the day and don't always remember what I read the night before and wanted to comment on.

[Ky'sMom]

I also poke in and out. Sometimes I poke in and read at work and type up a response but then get busy and by the time I post, APA logs me out so I lose the post then I am like fuming mad for a second LOL!

But Chrissy I would NEVER spend 6K on a vacation!!! I am way to cheap for that! Ours will be less than 2K for our family of 4. It will actually be less than $1500. I always budget vacations at $1500 or less. I may go up to 3K when Ky is older. I would like to take him to Africa to volunteer when he is a teenager and that will be pricey, but I am going to try to get in touch with a group where it can be tax deductible so I can write some of that trip off during tax time. It is just amazing to me though that a domestic vacation will cost that much. And it is amazing that the bulk of our trip will be admission to Disney and Universal. That will be $600-$800 alone ($800 if I pay for Elle, which I more than likely will not and hope that I won't have a string of misfortune due to telling a lie or lying by omission by indicating she is still 2). My MIL is coming with us so she is going to pay for half of the house we are renting, it is less than $500 for the time we are staying and I will drive my van. The drive is only 6-7 hours so I doubt that it will be more than $150 round trip for gas. My van gets excellent gas mileage on the highway.

Erin

[demigraf]

Doesn't Disney have some packages that include meals? I've researched them and saw one where we could have stayed 4 nights, including meals, for under $6,000. Maybe it was a deal of the century (it was a couple years ago) but I thought that was a good price for a family of 6.

Oh, is that all? :laugh:

I guess I'd go if under $6000 meant something like $60. Ha ha ha!

Erin, the problem I've found with volunteer orgs that go to Africa is that it's hard to find ones that aren't affiliated with a church or religion in some way. My girlfriend and I thought we found one and were going to do a charity volunteer trip by bike around Lake Malawi with a Scottish Christian charity that swore we wouldn't have to do any proseletyzing. We were to pay our own plane fare AND had to raise $3500 in donations to qualify. That was nearly off-putting by itself. But a little more research on Google pointed up some articles where the charity was accused of misappropriating funds, and there was evidence that 75,000 pounds had been spent for the director to take his wife and children on a "fundraising trip" to Disneyworld (speaking of...) So that put a stop to our Malawi plans. Anyway, if you do find an organization in Africa that you like, please let me know about it.

[Bridget]

Bridget, I forgot to say how proud I was of Savana, reading about her riding her bike. I got a tear in my eye! I keep peeking in here and then forgetting to post about what I read.
:wub: Thank you!

We are off to Milwaukee today to go to the zoo. No daycare so we have to venture out!

[AmeriBrit]

My mom sent me a care package today full of Reeses Buttercups. And my elderly neighbor baked an apple pie and mince meat pie for us. I think there is a conspiracy to fatten me up! :)

[AmeriBrit]

That sounds fun, Bridget!

I'm taking the boys with me in to town to buy Cash a birthday cake. He turns one on Friday!

[Ky'sMom]

Oh, is that all? :laugh:

I guess I'd go if under $6000 meant something like $60. Ha ha ha!

Erin, the problem I've found with volunteer orgs that go to Africa is that it's hard to find ones that aren't affiliated with a church or religion in some way. My girlfriend and I thought we found one and were going to do a charity volunteer trip by bike around Lake Malawi with a Scottish Christian charity that swore we wouldn't have to do any proseletyzing. We were to pay our own plane fare AND had to raise $3500 in donations to qualify. That was nearly off-putting by itself. But a little more research on Google pointed up some articles where the charity was accused of misappropriating funds, and there was evidence that 75,000 pounds had been spent for the director to take his wife and children on a "fundraising trip" to Disneyworld (speaking of...) So that put a stop to our Malawi plans. Anyway, if you do find an organization in Africa that you like, please let me know about it.


I am having some issues finding one that I like. A friend of mine from college (that I need to look up again because I lost his contact info) did a study abroad in Uganda and told me about an organization there that he did some volunteer work for after his study abroad but I cannot remember the name. He was religious but not Christian or Muslim, I can't remember which something like Rastafarianism (which I see more as a philosophy versus a religion) and he was against missionary work like I am. Won't get into my reasons here but I do have reasons. So I am going to try to track him down through a mutual friend to see if he remembers what the name was. I am also doing some reasearch of other organizations. I have some time though since I am not planning on doing this until Ky is around 14 or 15, maybe even 16. I want him to know during the height of teenagedom how great he has it here and to be thankful for the luxuries he possesses and also about how success in life and happiness is not determined by how much money or stuff you have but can be about helping others in need.



My mom sent me a care package today full of Reeses Buttercups. And my elderly neighbor baked an apple pie and mince meat pie for us. I think there is a conspiracy to fatten me up! :)


LOL Ash, just don't eat all of them on the same day!

Erin

[Cosmosmom]

:wub: Thank you!

We are off to Milwaukee today to go to the zoo. No daycare so we have to venture out!

Have fun! That is in my old neighborhood! It's such a great zoo.

[missychrissy]

Oh, is that all? :laugh:

I guess I'd go if under $6000 meant something like $60. Ha ha ha!
I guess it's all relative. 5 or 6 days with 6 people (4 of them eating as adults) including airfare is a little pricey no matter where you go. When we traveled AZ I spent around $5,000 including airfare for 5 of us, and there weren't any theme park rides involved. :P

[Ky'sMom]

:wub: Thank you!

We are off to Milwaukee today to go to the zoo. No daycare so we have to venture out!


Forgot to say. Hope you all have a great time!

Erin

[3andMe]

I have been looking into going to Mexico for Christmas break, and it is prohibitively expensive. I cannot countenance spending that much on a vacation without going halfway around the world. I just knew that adding one more person to our family was going to make a huge difference for our vacations, too - I'm not blaming baby S. since it's not his fault, and we talked about this before he was conceived, but a family of 5 on vacation vs. a family of 4 is the difference between two hotel rooms vs. one a lot of times. Multiply that times a week and it's very costly. Sigh.

Unfortunately, I had already started talking about Mexico to the kids. I want to go. I had already proposed to make it a family trip, and suggested to my mom and to my sister and bil that they look into meeting us there, and asked dh to ask his mom about going, too. I think I need to try to make it work.

Erin, maybe some of the international food relief organizations would be a good bet?

Bridget, have a great time at the zoo!

[Cosmosmom]

They really want you to get another hotel room? I would think later on sure but at the ages of the three kids that one room with the parents would still work just fine.

[Smplyme89]

Have fun bridget! I don't think I've ever been to a zoo that I can remember :chinscratch:

L I think its kind of ridiculous that they would want you to get 2 rooms, especially like Jennifer said with your LO's being so young

[Smplyme89]

I figured out why I am SO completely lost in my Intermediate Accounting class, apprently there are two pre-reqs that my advisor skipped over for some reason :eyebrow: I took some accounting classes when I was obtaining my A.A. but I didn't realize they were going to count for those courses. Those classes were over 2 years ago, this is going to be fun :crazy:

[missychrissy]

Are you going to add/drop and take the two pre-reqs?

[Smplyme89]

The classes from when I took my A.A. at the community college count as those classes (the pre-reqs) I don't really want to spend the money to retake them, if I already have the credits KWIM?? I dont' know, I left a message with the advisor and I'll talk to her when I hear back. At this point though, it would take me over a week to receive my books and I think it would just put me too far behind.

I'm hoping DH didn't throw out my old books so I can pull them out and refer to them again. It would probably help alot to just refresh my memory.

Is it weird that I'm excited cause its challenging :D

[3andMe]

I think there are regulations about the number of people in hotel rooms.

(Christine???) I am SO bad at names! NEVER been to the zoo????? What? I can say there was a long period of time I didn't go, but now I have a family membership. It's nice to be able to zip on over if I have a free couple of hours. Kids love animals, and now baby S. is getting really interested in them so it's nice to be able to go. Since it's close by and we have a membership, we don't feel obligated to go through the whole thing every time. We can just go to the big animals, or the children's area, or hang out with the meerkats or watch the leafcutter ants for a while and then go home. We went last weekend and baby S. saw the giraffes and started screeching with glee. And the tortoises were mating and making these really loud sounds that could be heard all the way over to the chimp area. My sister will never go with us, though, and neither will my dad, because they both have really strong feelings about caged animals.

I'm having a bad day. So is baby S. I have spent the past two hours trying to get him to nap. He was crying pretty much the whole time, interspersed with shrieks, and I was bent over his crib, patting him and rocking him and singing to him the whole time, except for brief forays out to the living room to give the twins more lunch and to remind them to be quiet. S. almost fell asleep a number of times, and each time was awakened, either by a twin bursting into the room (GRRRR!) chasing a wayward ball or by a coughing fit (he's sick) or by sheer contrariness. I came out and scolded the twins for being noisy and told them to sit on the couch and be quiet. In the end, after two hours of crying by S. and culminating in crying by me, I finally picked him up and brought him out to the living room. No nap for him, and I have no idea when or how I'm going to get all the chores done that I can usually only do during his naptime.

DD saw me crying and came over and gave me a big sloppy kiss and a hug and told me she hoped I would feel better. She is so sweet. But man, I feel like crap, and my back is killing me from leaning over the crib for two hours, and I know I'm going to do the same thing this evening, and I'm predicting more crying because of the no nap and being sick.

[missychrissy]

Is it weird that I'm excited cause its challenging :D

No, that's great!!


DD saw me crying and came over and gave me a big sloppy kiss and a hug and told me she hoped I would feel better. She is so sweet. But man, I feel like crap, and my back is killing me from leaning over the crib for two hours, and I know I'm going to do the same thing this evening, and I'm predicting more crying because of the no nap and being sick.
Awww L, bless her heart and :hugs: for you. I hope you have a surprisingly easy time tonight.

[3andMe]

Oh, something funny did happen last night, though. I came out after putting S. to bed and there were a bunch of balloons in the living room, saying "Congratulations!" and "It's a GIRL!" I turned to dh and said, "Honey, can I ask you a personal question? Is there something... or someONE I don't know about?"

He laughed and said there was a baby shower at work and the woman sent home extra balloons with everyone who had kids.

[3andMe]

That sounds fun, Bridget!

I'm taking the boys with me in to town to buy Cash a birthday cake. He turns one on Friday!

Happy birthday to Cash! Are you doing a party?

[missychrissy]

Oh, something funny did happen last night, though. I came out after putting S. to bed and there were a bunch of balloons in the living room, saying "Congratulations!" and "It's a GIRL!" I turned to dh and said, "Honey, can I ask you a personal question? Is there something... or someONE I don't know about?"

He laughed and said there was a baby shower at work and the woman sent home extra balloons with everyone who had kids.
:laugh:

I'm having such a hard time keeping up! Bridget-I hope your day at the zoo was great!

Happy Birthday a little early to Cash. I cannot believe he's a year already!

[Gwenn]

I'm back from my HSG. The procedure went without a hitch and the doctor said everything looked great! So we're just waiting for DH's repeat s/a and then we'll know for sure what our plan is.

I did cramp a lot, though, and I got motion sick in the car on the way home and was afraid I was going to throw up. The radiology place was really far from my house, too, so it was a 45 minute drive with me trying not to throw up and cramping a lot. Got home and took a nap, and woke up a little while ago feeling hung over from the valium and still a little crampy. Not a ton of fun, but I'm glad to know for sure everything is okay.

My new eval partner, G, told me to stay home tomorrow if I was still crampy. I don't think she'd mind a bit if we had to reschedule our evals! I don't think that will be necessary, but I like that she said that. We'll see how it goes.

L, that's hilarious about the balloons!

Happy almost birthday to Cash!

[Bridget]

I'm so glad the appt went well!
Lydia, you and dh are so witty in your conversations! I asked dbf last nightt if the bromance fizzled out because his buddy who comes over every stinking day didn't show up for a couple. He laughed pretty hard when I said that and I felt witty. I love being successfully funny.
The zoo was fantastic. Dbf came with us which surprised me. When I asked earlier this week he said something like, "I might be able to do that." I told him I wasn't asking him as a favor but that I was inviting him to join us. Then i didn't mention it again and he was all for it. We had such a pleasant day. It's days like today that I think sometimes he must be listening. He was very patient and selfless with the children. Often our outing revolve around when he is tired or when he is hungry, tired, bored. Today he did good.:)

[Gwenn]

I'm so glad the appt went well!
Lydia, you and dh are so witty in your conversations! I asked dbf last nightt if the bromance fizzled out because his buddy who comes over every stinking day didn't show up for a couple. He laughed pretty hard when I said that and I felt witty. I love being successfully funny.
The zoo was fantastic. Dbf came with us which surprised me. When I asked earlier this week he said something like, "I might be able to do that." I told him I wasn't asking him as a favor but that I was inviting him to join us. Then i didn't mention it again and he was all for it. We had such a pleasant day. It's days like today that I think sometimes he must be listening. He was very patient and selfless with the children. Often our outing revolve around when he is tired or when he is hungry, tired, bored. Today he did good.:)

Great news about your outing! And the bolded was definitely successfully funny.

[daylilies]

So, today Josh asked what his testicles were. Actually, what he said was, "What are these bumps down here?" I said they're testicles and he said "What are tes-ti-cles for?" I told him there were seeds in there to help him make a baby with a lady someday. :shrug: He seemed content with that.

[Cosmosmom]

Gwen, glad to hear it went pretty well! I thought that might be where you were when you said you were on valium. Have you heard anything about the blood draw yet?

Bridget, what a fantastic day that sounds like! I like trying to be funny but really DH is the funny one. He makes me laugh pretty much every day. I wish that he wasn't so shy and introverted because people just don't know that side of him except the select few....and when they finally see that side of him, they are shocked at how funny he can be.

kate, that sounds like a perfect explanation!

[Gwenn]

Gwen, glad to hear it went pretty well! I thought that might be where you were when you said you were on valium. Have you heard anything about the blood draw yet?

Yes, I got the lab results today by phone as well. My folate is low, which doesn't surprise me (folic acid is recommended as treatment for MTHFR) and also my TSH was high indicating mild hypothyroid. My mom and sister both have hypothyroid, so I wasn't too surprised to hear it. I'm supposed to take 3mg of folic acid daily including what is in my prenatal, and I could swear the nurse who called me said they wanted a re-check of my TSH in 6 months or immediately on pregnancy.

Oddly, on the way to the radiology office we stopped to pick up my abx (I'm supposed to take them to prevent any infection from the dye and DH has to take them, too) and when I gave her my name, she had a bag with two prescriptions. The first was folic acid (which I picked up an identical prescription last week so I don't know why there was another one) and the second was thyroid medication. I'm totally confused, because the nurse didn't tell me I was supposed to take thyroid meds. I told her I was there to pick up the abx and she had to go looking and found them in another bag. I didn't purchase the other two yet - I want to call the doctor's office and find out what was going on with that.

Any info you ladies have to share about hypothyroid and fertility and pregnancy is welcome - really I don't know much about that. Might explain why I've been feeling sluggish and depressed recently - actually both that and the folic acid I suspect.

[Smplyme89]

Awww I missed that Cash's birthday is coming up! :party:

L, we didn't exactly do very many "family" outings growing up. My mom was always working and my dad doesn't do people, crowds, or fun :eyeroll: I've already looked into annual passes for when N gets a little bit bigger (as in walk :laugh:) DH and I are looking forward to it :D

Bridget I am glad you, DH and the kids had a good time at the zoo!

Kate that is hilarious! I think you did a great job of explaining it!

Jennifer your DH sounds alot like mine. He is SO funny, but incredibly.... shy?? I dont really know how to explain it. He's insecure in some ways and not so much in others... He is a complex man, but anyway my point was he is SO funny as well just never lets it show!

Gwen I am glad to hear the HSG was clear! That is awesome news :hooray: I have no experience with hypothyroid and fertility, sorry :(

Did I forget anyone :crazy:

[Cosmosmom]

Yes, I got the lab results today by phone as well. My folate is low, which doesn't surprise me (folic acid is recommended as treatment for MTHFR) and also my TSH was high indicating mild hypothyroid. My mom and sister both have hypothyroid, so I wasn't too surprised to hear it. I'm supposed to take 3mg of folic acid daily including what is in my prenatal, and I could swear the nurse who called me said they wanted a re-check of my TSH in 6 months or immediately on pregnancy.

Oddly, on the way to the radiology office we stopped to pick up my abx (I'm supposed to take them to prevent any infection from the dye and DH has to take them, too) and when I gave her my name, she had a bag with two prescriptions. The first was folic acid (which I picked up an identical prescription last week so I don't know why there was another one) and the second was thyroid medication. I'm totally confused, because the nurse didn't tell me I was supposed to take thyroid meds. I told her I was there to pick up the abx and she had to go looking and found them in another bag. I didn't purchase the other two yet - I want to call the doctor's office and find out what was going on with that.

Any info you ladies have to share about hypothyroid and fertility and pregnancy is welcome - really I don't know much about that. Might explain why I've been feeling sluggish and depressed recently - actually both that and the folic acid I suspect.


Yeah I can. I have hypothyroidism and have taken pills since I was maybe 21ish. I was really concerned about it and did a ton of research on it when I still thought I would end up pg. It's vital to have good thyroid levels for pg and it's a good thing that they want you on meds. Too often a TSH is considered "normal" but really isn't normal enough to support a pregnancy. Too high a TSH and you either won't get pg, if you do you have a high risk of miscarriage or if you don't, being hypothyroid while pg is associated with a lower IQ in the child. With meds correcting you to good levels, all those things above go away. They will definitely want to recheck your levels at least once a trimester because pg hormones can affect levels.

Do you know what your TSH was? Ideal for pg should be between 1-2. And you should be having the first recheck in 6 weeks. Once stable, you generally only need to be rechecked once a year except of course when you get pg.

the prophylactic antibiotics is pretty standard for both in a couple.

Oh and one thing to do is take the thyroid alone....other pills can affect absorption. It's best on empty stomach but if you are going to take it with food, you should always take with food. I take mine when I first get up and I do eat within 20-30 minutes. The rest of my vitamins and such I take at night.

Folic acid is easy enough to take. So it sounds really good that the rest of the labs came out ok....the two that were low are ones that it's easy to do something about.

[Gwenn]

Okay, that makes sense. She gave me a LOT of information by phone and I don't do well with streams of auditory information by phone. I'm better when I'm face to face or can read information like that - I actually asked her if she could email me all the info and she said she'd mail it to me. Don't know why that can't email lab results as a follow up to a phone call, wouldn't that make sense?

Anyway, I think she said my TSH was 3.something - 3.4 maybe? Not certain - I meant to write it down but she was saying so much I couldn't write and listen.

I did think she said 6 months but maybe she did say 6 weeks. Hopefully the doctor will clarify.

Thanks for your help.

[AmeriBrit]

Happy birthday to Cash! Are you doing a party?

Thanks, L. No, no party. Just a little catepillar cake and the immediate family over for coffee and cake/ice cream tomorrow evening. I will hang up decorations, though. Just no official party and all that jazz.


My new eval partner, G, told me to stay home tomorrow if I was still crampy.

I've only had about 3 hours sleep and I read taht as "evil" partner. I chuckled. And then re-read it.


So, today Josh asked what his testicles were. Actually, what he said was, "What are these bumps down here?" I said they're testicles and he said "What are tes-ti-cles for?" I told him there were seeds in there to help him make a baby with a lady someday. :shrug: He seemed content with that.

That's a pretty good explanation....I cringe when I think of those kind of questions....I just hope I can answer things correctly.

I went to a Pampered Chef party last night that my best friend was hosting. We had a fun night. She's the only other expat who is a southerner like me, so we clicked from the first time we met 8 years ago. I didn't get home til after 11pm and at 11:30, Cash was up crying. He then got up at 12:30 and then 3:00 and then up for the day at 6:00. I am so tired. It's nights like that where I think 'yep, 2 kids are enough for me.' DH is going for a vasectomy at the end of September and I keep having second thoughts about it, but I'm pretty sure we're happy with our decision.

[missychrissy]

Today he did good.:)

I'm really glad. :wub:


So, today Josh asked what his testicles were. Actually, what he said was, "What are these bumps down here?" I said they're testicles and he said "What are tes-ti-cles for?" I told him there were seeds in there to help him make a baby with a lady someday. :shrug: He seemed content with that.

:laugh: oh man, even after 4 of them I still dread those questions. I'm glad he was happy with your answer!!

Conner has done the funniest thing when his is at attention...he asks what's wrong with it and then tries to hit it to make it go back down. :crazy: I tell him nothing is wrong with it and that it will go down eventually on its own. He seems ok with that and doesn't ask any more questions, but it kinda cracks me up inside every time it happens.



I've only had about 3 hours sleep and I read taht as "evil" partner. I chuckled. And then re-read it.

I read the same thing the first time too. :laugh:

[missychrissy]

Mandy-how are you feeling today?

[Gwenn]

I've only had about 3 hours sleep and I read taht as "evil" partner. I chuckled. And then re-read it.

LOL - I write that word a lot in work emails and the spell check always wants to replace it with evil!


Mandy-how are you feeling today?

Nauseous and crampy in waves. Not constant, and not wipe-out horrible, but bad enough that I don't feel up to chasing nonverbal kids around and I have two evil evals scheduled this morning. I did call in sick, because I know G was okay with it. I really hate to cancel an appointment the parents have scheduled, but I don't think I'd do good work. I could go in and write reports but I would hate to go in at all after cancelling the evals so I stayed home.

[daylilies]

Maybe it's weird but I feel like the best thing about being a parent is being able to teach your kids things...I always try to choose my words wisely when Josh asks me how something in his body works or what something is, because it may be the most accurate answer he'll have, at least until middle school health class.

[Cosmosmom]

Kate that isn't weird. I think that is one of things we really look forward too...being able to teach the kid stuff.

[Gwenn]

That's one of the things I really enjoyed when I worked with the non-Autistic kids at work. Those kids (well, many of them) really looked up to me as a role model and asked a lot of questions about everything under the sun - in the speech room I really encourage them to ask a lot of questions and I'm happy to answer them. The 4-5th graders are really the greatest because they're really starting to think about the big picture of the world, but the hormones haven't hit yet. It's really a wonderful stage of childhood. One of my child development books called that age "the calm before the storm." Really the only point in your life where you are capable of really advanced logical thought and no hormones to interfere!

Those kids were a lot of fun - but in the end I really love working with the non-verbal kiddos, too and I'm good at it. When I dealt with the kids with a mild pronunciation problem and huge amounts of "attitude" I had no patience for them after dealing with kids with really severe problems who managed to keep a smile on their face. So I really don't want to work with "normal" kids again, fun as it was.

[demigraf]

I wish my DH wore tighter tshirts. Just sitting here looking at a guy in one thinking how nice DH would look in it. DH is very conscious of whether he thinks he looks pretentious, but there's a bit of pretentiousness in his attempts to be deliberately unpretentious.

Kate, I love it when I feel like I actually teach Bodhi something. It's like no other feeling I know. :)

Christina, how's the int. Accounting class going? I think it's always helpful to learn the basic concepts when you have to hurriedly learn them to apply them to more difficult concepts. I mean, it helps to solidify basic concepts when you have to use them in harder ones. did that make sense? Probably not. Lol.

Mandy, I hope you're feeling better. I hope the results of your dh's SA give you a good sense of direction.

[missychrissy]

I wish my DH wore tighter tshirts. Just sitting here looking at a guy in one thinking how nice DH would look in it. DH is very conscious off whether he thinks he looks pretentious, but there's a bit of pretentiousness in his attempts to be deliberately unpretentious.
:laugh: You crack me up!!

Work is mega busy and people aren't giving us a minute's rest. 3 laptops are going to arrive tomorrow and I fear there will be some temper tantrums if we don't get them done before quitting time as they (the profs) have to work Monday and we don't. Ugh. On a positive note, bossman is being extra nice to me. I think my near leaving scared him straight.

[Smplyme89]

Kate I feel the same way. I really look forward to teaching N things :wub: In regards to his body, my biggest stickler is making sure that we use the "correct" names for his body parts. I always hated that penis, testicles, vagina were all so "taboo" :eyeroll:

Class is... going :laugh: I'm feeling more confident as teh days go by, but between the stomach bug I got on Tuesday and DH working until 9 last night I have not accomplished as much as I would've liked. He took off early today, picked N up from the sitters though so I have the whole evening to do what I need to do :D

[daylilies]

I hate how my DH dresses too, but he doesn't have the body for the things I like to see guys wear...he's so tall and skinny, anything fitted would make him look even more like a twig, I think.

About the body parts...I like to use correct names too, but we've been using peenee for penis since he was a baby, and I'm trying to break out of that too. I'm glad I fielded the question about his testicles, or DH would have told him it was called his junk. :eyeroll:

[Smplyme89]

Kate that is hilarious! :lol: Sounds like something my DH would say too!

[Cosmosmom]

In regards to his body, my biggest stickler is making sure that we use the "correct" names for his body parts. I always hated that penis, testicles, vagina were all so "taboo" :eyeroll:




Kind of ironic given what I do for work but I just really dislike the technical names for those body parts. I hardly ever say them outloud....though do have to sometimes for work.
Course a lot of times at home we don't use the correct medical terms.....I would say chicken pox and not herpes zoster or cancer instead of neoplasm. It's why my handy dandy medical dictionary :winks: comes in so handy.....half the time I get a request for a search I have to look up in there to see what I'm looking up. Sometimes I get the request and am like :crazy: until I break down the correct terms into something that makes sense.

Back to topic.....at home I just usually say "area". :laugh:

[Smplyme89]

Okay I had no clue that chicken pox wasn't a technical name :laugh:

I find that alot of people are uncomfortable with those terms, but I think its because there are so many "slang" words used in place of them that the technical words are somehow looked at as "dirty". I love how uncomfortable I can make people when I say penis :P

[Cosmosmom]

Okay I had no clue that chicken pox wasn't a technical name :laugh:

I find that alot of people are uncomfortable with those terms, but I think its because there are so many "slang" words used in place of them that the technical words are somehow looked at as "dirty". I love how uncomfortable I can make people when I say penis :P

Yeah I don't think the words are dirty....I just think that they sound ugly.

Yup chicken pox isn't technical....found that out when doing a search 7 or 8 years ago. Personally like that better than herpes zoster though!
and I use heel spur instead of plantar fasciitis......

[Smplyme89]

Breaking out all the big medical terms on me Jennifer, you're going to give me a headache :crazy:

Now herpes zoster sounds dirty :laugh:

ETA: Oh and I wanted to add, your explanation of them being ugly is actually really accurate. As far as I'm concerned our junk and their area is indeed very ugly :laugh:

[Ky'sMom]

I think my vaginal area is very pretty! I also think DH's penis is cute. He hates it when I say that because cute, he says, is not the way a man wants his stuff described. He would rather I say how monstrously huge it is and how I'm afraid of it!! We have this discussion often because we are strange and when he is looking upset or something I break out a good name for his penis. I try to think of names that will make him smile when I describe his penis like a humongous hairy beast or something, nicknamed Tripple H or Harry Beast, his favorite was The Cock Meister. Like I said I am silly

I am always giving out the humor and DH usually doesn't get my wit, even though other people think I'm funny and are always telling DH that he is lucky he has a wife who is so fun loving. He never gets my jokes though but loves the penis names so I go with what works.

DH would never wear a tight shirt. He is too self conscious about his body and plus since Atlanta is stereotypically known as a black gay man's haven, he is afraid that people will think he is gay if he wears certain clothes like tight shirts or shiny shoes. He is ridiculous with his apparel requirements not to look gay. My friend I mentioned who told him that Ky was crying that time when he was making comparison's is gay and every time my friend comes over he asks him questions about what can be seen as gay to make sure that he doesn't get whatever it is. My friend makes things up and we laugh about it and DH is like "no but really, I want to know" and he is all serious it is unbelievable.

Erin

[Gwenn]

LOL, Erin.

I have decided I :wub: my RE. I had no idea I had a thyroid issue, but reading up on it I have quite a few of the symptoms. I am tired all.the.time, and I can sleep for 10-12 hours and still be tired. I'm also cold once it hits about 75 degrees. I've been depressed, too, and I assumed that was just dealing with deployment and infertility, but it's a symptom of low thyroid. I've also been super forgetful and I feel like I don't think well on my feet these days. I've been feeling that way for a long time. All of those are symptoms of hypothyroid. I've probably had thyroid issues for years and never known it. I am so amazed that there is one simple answer to that, and such an easy treatment!

[Bridget]

LOL, Erin.

I have decided I :wub: my RE. I had no idea I had a thyroid issue, but reading up on it I have quite a few of the symptoms. I am tired all.the.time, and I can sleep for 10-12 hours and still be tired. I'm also cold once it hits about 75 degrees. I've been depressed, too, and I assumed that was just dealing with deployment and infertility, but it's a symptom of low thyroid. I've also been super forgetful and I feel like I don't think well on my feet these days. I've been feeling that way for a long time. All of those are symptoms of hypothyroid. I've probably had thyroid issues for years and never known it. I am so amazed that there is one simple answer to that, and such an easy treatment!

What a relief! I am so so happy for you.

And I agree, lol Erin!

[missychrissy]

LOL, Erin.

I have decided I :wub: my RE. I had no idea I had a thyroid issue, but reading up on it I have quite a few of the symptoms. I am tired all.the.time, and I can sleep for 10-12 hours and still be tired. I'm also cold once it hits about 75 degrees. I've been depressed, too, and I assumed that was just dealing with deployment and infertility, but it's a symptom of low thyroid. I've also been super forgetful and I feel like I don't think well on my feet these days. I've been feeling that way for a long time. All of those are symptoms of hypothyroid. I've probably had thyroid issues for years and never known it. I am so amazed that there is one simple answer to that, and such an easy treatment!
That is a relief that there's an answer. Have you ever described those symptoms to another dr? I've experienced similar and have had my thyroid tested at least twice but mine was in normal range. I'm also freezing if it's below 75 and I have always been like that. And the other symptoms too.

Everything is falling all apart at home :(

[daylilies]

Mandy, I can't believe nobody's ever tested your thyroid. It's the first thing any new therapist or doctor asks me if when I tell them I struggle with depression.


Chrissy, I'm sorry. Keep us updated.

[Bridget]

Chrissy, I thought about you all 8 times I was up with Sawyer last night. :hugs:

[missychrissy]

:wub: Thanks Bridget.

[Smplyme89]

Erin that is hilarious :laugh: DH and I have those discussions too, he thinks his penis is THE most gorgeous thing in the entire world :eyeroll:

Gwenn that is fantastic news. I am sure with treatment you will be expecting your bundle soon :bellyrubs:

Chrissy, I don't even know what to say. I'm sorry :hugs:

[Bridget]

The baby I take care of showed up sick this morning. Mom said, "She felt really hot to me this morning so I gave her tylenol before I brought her in". I really wish parents would just know not to bring them in when they have a fever because I hate telling them they have to take their child home with them. I apologized to her 3 times and then wonder why I am the one apologizing. I really do understand the struggle of having a sick child and needing to go to work but I'm glad I didn't let her stay. In the past I have waivered on this and it just sets unclear limits.

Anyone doing anything special for Labor Day?

[missychrissy]

Ugh Bridget what a pita.

We're not doing anything special...I have to the the girls school clothes shopping is all. This year I'm actually looking forward to it because it'll get me out of the house. I hate shopping, but I hate being home even more right now.

[Smplyme89]

That seems really inconsiderate IMO. You have other children (including your own) that you care for. The little girl could very well get the others sick, I guess some people just don't think in that regard. :dunno:

Nothing special here, my goal is to get hopefully at least a week ahead on school work. :fingerscrossed: Doesn't that sound like fun!

Oh my DH's smart self smashed his thumb with a hammer yesterday at work. Just a couple months ago he caught another one of his fingers in a mixer :eyeroll: Its split open and has a chunk of meat sticking out :gross: We've been through this before and know how to take care of it so I guess thats the upside :eyebrow:

[Ky'sMom]

That is a PITA Bridget. I don't understand why people don't keep their kids home when they are ill. They will get better resting at home and being comforted by parents IMO. My daycare lady actually told me once that I could bring Elle in if she were sick and they would keep her in another part of the house away from the other kids if I really needed to go to work. This was after I called letting her know Elle was sick so would stay home a day or two. I thought that was sweet of her but declined. I get a lot of PTO time at my job so it isn't a big deal, but she did tell me that she lost a family once whose child got strep throat and they had to miss 2 days of work so they were fired.

So happy that you got your thyroid checked Gwenn. I don't remember ever getting mine checked and some women in my family do have thyroid problems. I just figure they do it yearly at my physical. I think I will ask next time and I hope the therapy works quickly for you.

And Christina you can do it with the school work. I remember when I went back to college in 2006 after being out since 2001 and I had to take an advanced French course, needless to say, I did not remember ANY French and on the first test I got an F and I was literally about to cry in French class, which would have looked ridiculous, me being the oldest in class and all. I held back the tears and found an old French book at the library and re-learned French in about a week up to the next level that I was currently at. I got an A on the next test and so my F was dropped as our prof said he would drop the lowest grade in the class if we got an A on one of our exams. Going back is so difficult at first until you get in the swing of things.

And Chrissy big time hugs to you. I have been thinking of you as well and am hoping this difficult time will be over for you soon.

We are also not really doing anything for Labor Day. I am going to clean out my fridge and my stove though as I haven't done it in a while but will probably do both on Saturday. I also am going to BBQ. I would have DH do it but he is prone to burning things so I'm going to do that myself, probably on Saturday as well so that I can enjoy Sunday and Monday as holidays and not do anything but go to the gym and sleep in. I will probably take the kids to the zoo as well.

Oh and Christina I would so come and get you if you lived close to go to the zoo. We have a membership because it is cheaper to buy a membership than to visit the zoo one time here since one person is $20 a piece. You can get a membership for $89 whereas it would cost us $80 to go to the zoo so I usually go every week from Sept through around May, until it gets hot outside.

Erin

[daylilies]

No plans here...the King Richard's Faire, a big Ren fest in the area, starts this weekend, and it's the 30th anniversary, so I'm sure it'll be huge. I'm thinking of braving the crowd and taking Josh on opening day tomorrow because DH will be at work. No plans for the rest of the weekend though.

Bridget, I don't remember if it was this thread or another but you were mentioning that your kids have a bunch of craft things to play with, so yesterday I ditched a bunch of things Josh doesn't play with anymore and went to the craft store. He really likes the things we got.

I'm looking for things like empty tin cans (like coffee can size and smaller) or other things we can make stuff like robots or musical instruments out of, something besides collage stuff. Any ideas?

[AmeriBrit]

I didn't realise it was labor day! I forget most American holidays besides 4th July and Thanksgiving. We're going out tomorrow with my bff and her husband. And then, on Sunday we're off to a birthday party.

Today, we met up with 3 other Americans. I love when we get together with other expats. It's fun to vent with people who are in the same situation.

Chrissy, I hope things start looking up soon. Don't let things get you too down.

[AmeriBrit]

I didn't realise it was labor day! I forget most American holidays besides 4th July and Thanksgiving. We're going out tomorrow with my bff and her husband. And then, on Sunday we're off to a birthday party.

Today, we met up with 3 other Americans. I love when we get together with other expats. It's fun to vent with people who are in the same situation.

Chrissy, I hope things start looking up soon. Don't let things get you too down.

[3andMe]

Chrissy, I'm so sorry things aren't going well. I haven't had time to really check in, but I've been thinking about you a whole lot. We went to bed really early last night because S and his ear infection kept him awake and crying until 3 am the night before.

NVM. I was just asked to clock in early, so forget everything else I was going to say.

[Smplyme89]

Thanks Erin. Knowing that other mama's could do it really does help give me some confidence in myself :) and your really sweet. I love hearing about people doing things like that with there kids :wub: DH and I both grew up in similar households and strive to be sure that we do SO much more with NOlan growing up. :wub:

[demigraf]

Bridget, SHM at that momma bringing in her sick baby. I know she must have a hard time making a sick child work around the demands of her job, and I feel for her, but it's unfair to make her problem your problem too. Good for you for standing your ground.

Chrissy - :hugs: I have been thinking of you too. I know it's hard with all the things going on right now, but from all the way over here, I see you trying to *do something* about all your various difficulties, and you're such a fighter, and the choices you make are full of hope and positivity. So here's a great big "Go on!" from me to you.

No big plans here. I'm going to try to take off early today and get Bodhi to the zoo in the afternoon. It's very nice to live just 10 minutes from the SF Zoo. It's not as grand as the Oakland Zoo near L where we have annual passes too (DH & I think the Oak. Zoo is better than the San Diego Zoo, even), but little kids like Bodhi get excited about the little things like riding the steam train, the cat with a fish in its mouth on the carousel, the fact that the bug house has little plastic stools that he can carry around and stand on, and the petting zoo has ride-on tractors. The rest of the weekend I want to do NOTHING. Yay!

Kate, I'm jealous that you're going to the ren faire. I haven't been since I was a kid, but when I was 15, I kinda sorta dated a swordfighter from the Renaissance Faire. I have another super embarrassing story: around that same age, I LIED to another bf that I had had a girl-with-girl, um, "romantic" encounter at the campground where the characters stayed at the faire... because I thought it made me sound so mature and worldly. Oh my. I've never told that to anybody, and I feel so much better for having gotten that off my chest.

Erin, your whole post above was HILARIOUS. You and your DH should have your own sitcom.

[Ky'sMom]

I have seen Wonder Woman today, about 20 elves (both gothic and pixie like), fairies (also both gothic and pixie like), about 5 Dorthies from the Wizard of Oz (of 5 different ethnicities to boot), a lady dressed in a plastic red garbage bag with ammo across her chest, about 3 storm troopers from Star Wars, both Superman and Superwoman, Batman, a few Spiderman's, and a lady with very bright pink thick dreadlocks down to her knees eating Chik-Fil-A at the food court while I was on lunch today and other people dressed up in very interesting garb.

Dragon Con is here. We are going to the parade tomorrow morning.

I totally am thinking that Ky and I may go to the events next year. I went to lunch with DH who mentioned all the "freaks and geeks" and so I told him Ky was a freak and a geek, he has called himself both with pride (he is goofy like his mom which can be both fortunate and unfortunate). DH insisted that his son was not a geek, he very well might be a freak when he gets older because DH is a freak (in bed of course is what he was hinting at) but Ky was not a geek. I told him that just because DH wasn't smart enough to be a geek doesn't mean that he should take away that opportunity for Ky. I was a geek and a dork and a nerd and even a teacher's pet and a tattle tell. I was not ashamed. Ky is not all that but he is pretty geeky, I made sure to mention one of my favorite "bible" versus regarding how "the geek shall inherit the earth." DH looked at me like :eyebrow:. I think he saw both my freak and geek in that moment instead of the Dragon Con crowd's freaky/geeky costumes.

Erin

[daylilies]

Myles! :shock: You bad girl you. :P I'm glad you feel better having told someone!

I used to be into that whole scene...in fact the last guy I dated before I exclusively ended up with DH was really into it too, and we made out in the rain at a Ren fest one year...sigh...
How I ended up down the more straight and narrow path I don't know.

Erin I'm jealous! I wish I were there!