Secular Confessions

[Gwenn]

Bridget, that's so sweet about what your dad said. He is a great guy. I'm glad your appointment went so well.

Kate, the Bronx Zoo is awesome! You'll love it, and so will Josh. Have a great time.

I confess I'm trying to order a new cell phone and it's just been :pokey::headbang::pokey: all the way.

[missychrissy]

Who's your carrier? What kind of phone are you looking at?

[Gwenn]

Switched carriers from a pre-paid plan to a "real" phone on a real carrier. It's my treat to myself since DH is gone and I've been using a crappy phone for 2 years now! I just got it - a Palm Pixi Plus. Trying to figure it all out, and getting slightly overwhelmed!

[sunrider]

I confess maybe I need to be medicated. Do they make a drug for chronic worry?

Last night was a rough night. For some reason Liam woke up twice and had a really hard time getting back to sleep - not even boob helped. Took 20 min both times to get him back to sleep. So when nap time came this afternoon I was looking forward to one myself.

Only I kept waiting to hear the dog bark because I know I'm going to be served more lawsuit papers. I've NEVER been to court and have a court date Tuesday. Received an "offer" from a debt collection place. A gracious generous offer of "pay 20% down and we'll work out a payment plan to get the rest paid off within one year" The total is something like $8400. Gee, assholes, don't you think if I had that kind of money laying around I'd be paying already?

And seriously depressed that my last conversation with the lawyer yesterday was her saying " I want to be able to make it so you don't want to just sit there and cry, but right now I don't know how to help you." And this is a bankruptcy lawyer. Dam our reliability and loving families. :hot:

Just want to :cry: again.

[Gwenn]

:hugs: Krista, that's awful. I'm so sorry you're going through this.

[midgeend]

Oh Krista, I'm sorry. There are things available to help with worry, natural, and pharmaceutical, so if you want help with that let me know.

I hope that some of your stress will lift soon.

[stephmama]

I'm sorry you guys are in such a tough spot. :(

[stephmama]

Midge, how's it going? How far along were you when you gave birth last time?



I wonder how Maggie's doing...

[sunrider]

Yes, Midge, share the knowledge please. Jonathan is on a med for anti-anxiety which is helping tremendously. He's suggested I go see his doc and I just don't know.

Unless the lawyer finds out some loophole, it's a 2 year plus long stress.

Both our parents, knowing we are the responsible children we are, included us on home deeds. If we file bankruptcy now, those homes can be seen as OUR assets and sold to pay off debt, leaving our parents homeless. So we can quit-claim deed them back to our parents to get our names off of them. Then you have to wait TWO YEARS before filing bankruptcy, or they can still seize/sell, figuring you were just transferring ownership as a way to hide your assets.

In the meantime, they can garnish our wages for those 2 years - 25% of my income and 10% of Jonathan's. I don't know how we'd survive with that much less money. I crunched the numbers and it's terrifying. Putting a lien on the house is another option (easy to strip in a bankruptcy), but the lawyer says they will continue to garnish so long as we have steady jobs because it's money now and a lien on the home takes years.

We could probably survive by really budgeting and mealplanning and NEVER doing anything fun and probably never traveling to see grandparents. And by dipping into savings for shortfalls. But in that 2 year time frame of having wages garnished, we would also need to be saving the retainer and bankruptcy fees for the lawyer to actually DO the bankruptcy.

See why I want to crawl in a hole and cry?

And I feel so ashamed of all this. I don't feel like I have anyone I can talk to other than DH and he just keeps saying it will be OK, it will be OK. But I'm the one that manages the finances. I'm the one that sees how we live practically paycheck to paycheck and how much impact being garnished would have on our lives. I just don't think he gets it.

OK, timer is going off in the kitchen. I'm going to go cry while fixing dinner.

[Bridget]

Oh, Krista. That sounds unbelievably stressfull. I'm so sorry.:hugs:

[MammaMia]

I'm so sorry Krista. :hugs: I didn't realise you were going through all of this.

[3andMe]

Krista, what a sad situation. I'm really sorry, and I can see how stressful it would be on top of everything else, to be worried about your parents' houses. I think it's totally normal to be anxious and unhappy, but I do think there are ways to deal with the emotions proactively so you can better cope with the stressors, including pharmaceutical and non-pharmaceutical help.

[girlwonder]

Krista :hugs:

[AbbeysMom]

Yes, Midge, share the knowledge please. Jonathan is on a med for anti-anxiety which is helping tremendously. He's suggested I go see his doc and I just don't know....

OK, timer is going off in the kitchen. I'm going to go cry while fixing dinner.

I am so sorry you're going through this. Don't be ashamed, you're confronting and dealing with the debt and moving on (or anticipating moving on, anyway). What an terrible amount of stress to be under, I really hope you can find a loophole. :hugs:

ETA: Do you parents know the situation with your finances?

[stash]

Hugs, Krista.

I confess I'm awake because I'm having contractions that woke me up. Every 5 minutes for 40 minutes. I think I might've gotten dehydrated and drank a ton of water - hoping they stop soon because I am not looking forward to hauling the boys to the er tonight. :(

[stash]

Hugs, Krista.

I confess I'm awake because I'm having contractions that woke me up. Every 5 minutes for 40 minutes. I think I might've gotten dehydrated and drank a ton of water - hoping they stop soon because I am not looking forward to hauling the boys to the er tonight. :(

[stash]

And omg my new phone double posts and I can't edit... sorry...

[Gwenn]

Hugs, Krista.

I confess I'm awake because I'm having contractions that woke me up. Every 5 minutes for 40 minutes. I think I might've gotten dehydrated and drank a ton of water - hoping they stop soon because I am not looking forward to hauling the boys to the er tonight. :(

Really hope they stop soon...

[stash]

They stopped, after about 48 ounces of water. Feeling relieved but idiotic right now :eyeroll:

[Gwenn]

Glad to hear it. Better to feel idiotic than to be in the ER, any day.

[missychrissy]

I'm glad they stopped Stash.

[sunrider]

I am so sorry you're going through this. Don't be ashamed, you're confronting and dealing with the debt and moving on (or anticipating moving on, anyway). What an terrible amount of stress to be under, I really hope you can find a loophole. :hugs:

ETA: Do you parents know the situation with your finances?

Yes, they both know - but can't really help. Jonathan's parents actually quit claimed the house to him about 2 years ago just so that if one of them passed the other would not lose the house with it being in Jonathan's name. My mother COULD probably help, but frankly I'm not going to ask her. She's loaned us a ton of money over the years, given us 2 cars when we needed one (different times). What money she has is for retirement (67 this year) and wouldn't dream of taking that from her.

They know . . . but they don't know how stressed I am right now.

Thank you all for the hugs. It felt good to get it out there.

[MammaMia]

I confess that I'm getting stressed out over my college application.

I asked several of my former employers to write me recommendation letters and they all said yes, of course they would, but I'm still waiting to actually get the letter from any of them. I need to get it all in by the 30th at the latest!

I don't want to bug them about it, but I'm worried they've forgotten.

[stash]

Bug them. Seriously, I'm never offended when someone reminds me to do a recommendation. Sometimes I just get busy and forget. It's not their priority, but it's yours, so it's okay to ask again.

[stash]

And right now I'm in l&d being monitored because they started up again this morning. Only two since I got here and that's good... blech.

[Bridget]

I had to bug the snot out of people to get letter of recommendation when I started my daycare. Not that they didn't want to, but they needed some prodding and no one seemed to mind the prodding.
:hugs: Stacy.

[missychrissy]

Oh Stacy. Poop...eta: not telling you to poop, just saying it in a 'oh crap' tone of voice :)

We've had a fantastic and busy weekend. Of course it flew by and I'm bummed it's over already. We went to see bands and fireworks Friday, we had multiple guests over for a bbq & bonfire Saturday and they all stayed the night. Sunday Rich made breakfast for everyone (yeah, on Father's day :) ) and I took the girls & Conner to a 'rail trail' where they could ride bikes and I roller skated.

I love summer. It is my all-time favorite season. It's "hot" and humid here and people are whining...but not me. I'm loving it.

[Bridget]

Stacy??? How is everything going?

I confess that three of my best friends came over on Saturday and took me out to lunch. Two of them had to drive two hours to get here. We went to a local mexican place and they laughed and cried with me. And I couldn't believe when I suddenly realized that I didn't have a headache for the first time in over a week. I seriously wish we all lived on commune so I could see them every day. They are so good for my soul.

I promised dbf sex for father's day. It's been awhile. We never get the chance because I'm so beyond tired at the end of the day I can hardly formulate a sentence. Sometimes I feel like I'm doped up, seriously. We went to fleet farm today so I could get paper towels and rubber gloves for the daycare and we split up for me to get what I needed and him to get his. When he found me, I had nothing. I couldn't find anything I needed and I was walking in circles. So weird. To his credit, he said not a word and just found what I needed. But back to my original point. :crazy: I promised him sex and he fell asleep putting Kai to bed. I know I should wake him up but I am so enjoying this peace and quiet...kids in bed an hour earlier than usual....

[Bean]

Stacy, take it easy woman! You're scaring me. :ohno:

[daylilies]

Hi everyone, I'm back from NYC. We are all wiped out but we had fun.
Stacy, take care!
Bridget, I'm glad you got some quality time with friends!

(hugs) Krista

I like the new name, Gwenn

I hope that about covers it...

[Gwenn]

Bridget, I'd let him sleep and make it up to him later. Sounds like neither of you are up to it anyway.

Stacy, how is it going?

[intactivstmom]

nvm. I'm having issues tonight, thought I was replying to another thread.

[Bridget]

Has Stacy posted anywhere??

[stash]

I'm here! I'm fine. Sorry I didn't post sooner. Contractions stopped while I was at l&d and I think it was just the dehydration... even after I was rehydrated my uterus was irritable. Spent the rest of the day watching sid the science kid with Oscar. Going in to have my midwife check my cervix today.... I'm still not feeling great... achy and tender... weird. Thanks for thinking of me and sorry if I worried you!!

[sunrider]

Phew, Stacy and bean are OK.

On the sex for Father's Day scenario, I'm keeping my finger's crossed that we did NOT make a baby for Father's Day. :shocker:

Had some fun on the end of the chaise while L was napping. Apparently the natural type condoms don't stay on as well (or at least could not cope with that particular session/position). When I got up - there was no condom in sight. DH "fished" it out of me and it was in a tight little ball.

Did I mention not an hour before Jonathan was talking about a vasectomy?

I think . . . hope . . . we'll be OK for when this happened in my cycle, but I don't hold all that much faith in the rhythm method.

[daylilies]

Fingers crossed Krista! Glad you're okay Stacy.

[missychrissy]

Hi everyone, I'm back from NYC. We are all wiped out but we had fun.
:hooray: Glad you had fun!! That's the most important part.

I only made it 15 hours without smoking. I might need to get a prescription for Zyban to help me out.

[Gwenn]

DH just called to say he was promoted this morning! This is so great, because when he was in the Army before he was a much higher rank than he is now. He had to take a demotion to join the guard and people understand his situation, but at first people are always puzzled because his rank doesn't match all the things he's done. This promotion doesn't take him all the way back to where he was, but he is a Sgt again and that comes with a raise! I'm so happy for him.

[missychrissy]

Oh Gwenn that's so wonderful!! I'm so happy for you both!! Woo hoo!!

[Bridget]

So relieved to hear that you and baby bean are okay, Stacy.
Chrissy, I didn't know you smoked. I swear, if I wasn't pregnant I think I may have caved this past week. I have never wanted a cigarette and a drink more in my life than I did after standing with my dad and my brother's for hours at my mom's wake. This baby is forcing me to stay healthy that is for sure. Good luck to you!
Gwenn, that is fabulous news!
In a few minutes I'm off to my obligatory appointment at our local hospital by dbf's request. I'm already really sure I want to go with the midwives but he really wants me to check out both so I'm doing it for him.
My dad just sent me an email that he went and worked out yesterday. I am so so proud of him.

[girlwonder]

That's great news, Mandy!

Glad you and bean are okay, Stash.

Nothing wrong with medication in trying to quit smoking. Whatever it takes. It took me years to quit, with lots of practice runs. My last time, when it "took" I used Zyban and did a lot of mental preparation and read a book by Allan Carr that was tremendously helpful in learning how to distance myself from the emotional need for smokes (pm me if you want more info - I highly recommend his program). I still love smoking, but I don't need them anymore. It's nice to be free.

[stash]

I was a smoker for years. When Jasper died, the first thing I did when I left the hospital was lit up a cigarette. I stopped again when I had Oscar, started again for a month or so (lightly) when he was around 18 months, then quit again. I've quit four times. This last time was "for good" - funny how you know it when it happens. I have absolutely no interest anymore in smoking. Nasty, horrible Fing habit and I refuse to be enslaved by them.

That said, there is NOTHING like a good glass of wine and a cigarette. Shame really :P

I used zyban once. Stopped taking it and felt like I was going to leap off a bridge, no kidding. Terrible drug, that.

[stash]

My cervix is "long and closed" by the way - YAY. No bedrest for me!!!

[stephmama]

Jeezus, I wish you would all stop talking about smoking. I want to so bad. :cry:

[Bridget]

My cervix is "long and closed" by the way - YAY. No bedrest for me!!!
YAY!

Jeezus, I wish you would all stop talking about smoking. I want to so bad. :cry:
I want WINE.

[3andMe]

Stacy, I'm so glad everything is okay!

It seems like S. is getting colic, and it's starting earlier and going later every night. The nice thing about this not being my first child is that I'm not taking it personally. yet.

[missychrissy]

My cervix is "long and closed" by the way - YAY. No bedrest for me!!!

That's awesome!


Stacy, I'm so glad everything is okay!

It seems like S. is getting colic, and it's starting earlier and going later every night. The nice thing about this not being my first child is that I'm not taking it personally. yet.
:( Oh no. Bobbie had colic. I remember well how difficult that can be.

I'm just so mad at myself for starting smoking again after 5.5 years. I simply lit up one night at a bar and that's all it took. For those 5.5 years, I never even had a puff, never wanted one and I really thought I was done. Ugh at me. I'm weak.

I'm am slightly inspired because you said you quit 4 times Stacy. I only quit successfully once. I never thought I'd be here again.

[The10Eels]

I confess I got everything in order today to have an ad placed in the KC Star to serve B... Fax it off in the am.

[3andMe]

I'm am slightly inspired because you said you quit 4 times Stacy. I only quit successfully once. I never thought I'd be here again.


I think I quit more than four times. In fact, I'm sure of it. And I re-started after Esme died (after years of being a non-smoker), but managed to quit two months later before conceiving the twins. With the previous history of SIDS, I was able to focus on not increasing my risk factors.

[sunrider]

I confess I got everything in order today to have an ad placed in the KC Star to serve B... Fax it off in the am.

OK, I know the girls in that signature, but the name . . . .

What is with everyone changing their names lately? :eyebrow:
Did I miss a memo?

[stash]

Oh Duh, sorry chrissy... I can't keep up with the posts and didn't realize you were currently smoking or I'd have added a little encouragement to my rant about smoking. Quitting is seriously the hardest thing I've done. My husband and I joke that the only time we've thought about divorce was when we were trying to quit. It's not a joke. I think it's that hard for some people, like me. I'm simply an addict, and not one of those people who can have just one. THAT's what keeps me from starting again - that I don't want to have to go through quitting again.

Chrissy, you know, because of your running you're actually in a great spot to quit. Heavy exercise helps loads. Not going to pretend though, it's still freakin hard. Don't beat yourself up though, just do something.

Think of it this way - you lost all that weight. You can certainly do this.

[stash]

Oh Duh, sorry chrissy... I can't keep up with the posts and didn't realize you were currently smoking or I'd have added a little encouragement to my rant about smoking. Quitting is seriously the hardest thing I've done. My husband and I joke that the only time we've thought about divorce was when we were trying to quit. It's not a joke. I think it's that hard for some people, like me. I'm simply an addict, and not one of those people who can have just one. THAT's what keeps me from starting again - that I don't want to have to go through quitting again.

Chrissy, you know, because of your running you're actually in a great spot to quit. Heavy exercise helps loads. Not going to pretend though, it's still freakin hard. Don't beat yourself up though, just do something.

Think of it this way - you lost all that weight. You can certainly do this.

[The10Eels]

OK, I know the girls in that signature, but the name . . . .

What is with everyone changing their names lately? :eyebrow:
Did I miss a memo?
I changed mine cause I figured better safe than sorry.... B knew my old name, and knew apa... so I didn't want him looking me up some day and seeing me vent about him, etc..

[Bridget]

I confess I got everything in order today to have an ad placed in the KC Star to serve B... Fax it off in the am.
So I don't get it. Does he actually get served via an ad in the paper? I'm so glad this will all be done for you soon.

I just read in Midge's birth room that she's likely in labor!:hooray:

[The10Eels]

So I don't get it. Does he actually get served via an ad in the paper? I'm so glad this will all be done for you soon.
Yes. The ad reads


Notice to "B"

You are notified that a Complaint for Divorce, Civil Action No. ________, has been filed in the Wyoming District Court for the Third Judicial District, whose address is 80 W Flaming Gorge Way Suite 255, PO BOX 430, Green River, WY 82935 seeking dissolution of your marriage to "Me" and a Decree of Divorce is in her favor. Unless you file an Answer or otherwise respond to this Complaint for Divorce within 30 days following the last date of publication of this notice, a Default Judgment will be taken against you and a Decree of Divorce will be granted.

It will run once a week, for four weeks.

[Gwenn]

I just read in Midge's birth room that she's likely in labor!:hooray:

:hooray:

[AmeriBrit]

I just read in Midge's birth room that she's likely in labor!:hooray:

Yaaaaaaaay!

[daylilies]

Cool!

[missychrissy]

It will run once a week, for four weeks.
That's great!

Yay for Midge!! Easy labor vibes!! :hooray:

[missychrissy]

I just signed up for NY's smokers quit line. If I'm eligible, they'll send me free patches. Ironically, I'm kind of excited about that. My cousin said they helped with her nicotine craving and for some reason that's where I really feel I need the most help right now.

Wish me luck.

[Gwenn]

Good luck!

[AmeriBrit]

Good luck, Chrissy; you can do it!

[daylilies]

Good luck Chrissy!

[stash]

Yay Midge and you can do it Chrissy!

[3andMe]

Midge gave birth already!

[missychrissy]

Oh wow--congrat Midge!!! Happy news :D

[Gwenn]

Wow, just logging in and was wondering how she was doing! That's great!

[MammaMia]

Yay!! Congrats Midge! :) Is there a thread about it?

[3andMe]

Yay!! Congrats Midge! :) Is there a thread about it?

This is all I saw: http://americanpregnancy.org/forums/showthread.php?t=259691

And GOOD LUCK Chrissy! I know you can do it!

[Bridget]

Dbf is freaking me out. He's being really cool. Pretty much since he came home from Vegas. I mean, what kind of jerk would he have to be to not be cool with me losing my mom and all but it's, like, consistent. Last night I was in the kitchen and had just emptied the dishwasher when he came in and said, "I'll finish in here" and loaded, cleaned the entire kitchen. :shocker:
He made a blunder last night when we were running some errands and he opened Kai's door to get him out of his seat while I opened Savana's. I said, "Oh, Kai took his shoes off" and dbf said, "Ugh. You get him out. I don't feel like dealing with that and he's being whiny." I said, "Get your son out of the car and I'll meet you inside."
He had the nerve to say, "Did you hear what I just said?" like an authority figure or something. I laughed and walked into the store. He actually came in and said, "Sorry about that." :shocker: He never apolgizes without prompting and even then it's usually, "Sorry you took that the wrong the way" or something equally insincere.

I hope this is change for real.

[missychrissy]

I hope this is change for real.
Oh me too Bridget. I really do.

[daylilies]

I hope so too Bridget!
What is it with kids taking their shoes off in the car? Josh does it too LOL
Does anyone here like Weird Al? We just saw him in concert last night. It's the second time he's come to this little old theater in the town next door. He's awesome in concert--sounds just like on CD and he's so high energy and very funny. We had a nice dinner in a restaurant that was completely empty but the food was okay. I was looking forward to a lobster salad and they were out of lobster though :(

[missychrissy]

Conner has always taken his shoes off in the car...but so do Sydney & I so I guess I never thought about it much.

I've never seen Weird Al in person, but I've listened to his CD's. He is a funny man!

[sunrider]

Yes. The ad reads



It will run once a week, for four weeks.

Wow, I didn't know they did notices like that in the paper. Good thing I'm not getting a divorce . . . I NEVER read the paper. And if I did buy one, I doubt I would read that section, LOL.

[girlwonder]

Congratulations, Midge! I just read the birth story you posted - a storybook birth!

[stash]

Where's the birth story?

[missychrissy]

Where's the birth story?

In NewMoms

http://americanpregnancy.org/forums/showthread.php?t=259827

[midgeend]

oooh i hope he's making some real changes bridget, that would be great.


annie takes her shoes off in the car too - i hate having to fish around for them.

chrissy!! i know you can quit. GL

thanks for the congrats about charlotte!

nak

[missychrissy]

I just love her name :wub:

[sunrider]

I confess Midge's birthstory makes me wish mine had gone differently. <sniff> But getting the baby OUT of my body was what terrified me most about having a child and I was too chicken to try something like a homebirth with drugs. I wonder if I'd had a glimpse of what was going to happen if I'd changed my mind.

[Bridget]

Oh Midge! That was the best birth story ever and makes me really excited for mine!! I am so happy for you. She is beautiful. What does Annie think of her?

[AmeriBrit]

Midge, you had a girl? LOL....so, there might be hope for me since I think this baby is a boy and everyone wants a girl...lol, I'm off to read your birth story now!

[Gwenn]

That's great, Bridget.

Midge, what a beautiful name. Off to read the birthstory.

[stash]

Hooray midge!!!_

[Cosmosmom]

Congrats Midge! :)
I have always loved the name Charlotte and wanted to use it...until I found out what my married name would be. (same thing with Samantha....both sound :crazy:when said with our last name).

[Gwenn]

OMG OMG OMG. I've been nauseated ever since I woke up today. It got so strong that I just went and looked at my chart, which I've totally ignored this month. I don't temp, but when I have I usually O around CD 19/20. DH flew in on CD 18 and we BD'd that night. If I did O on CD 19 then today would be 11 DPO.

Do you really think this could be happening right now or am I just freaking out and having phantom symptoms? I want to test but don't want to test too early.

[AmeriBrit]

Oooh, Gwen...wait a few days and test! I never got a positive til AF was due, so that's why I'd wait a few days.

[Gwenn]

You're right, I have to wait ... I don't think I could handle a false negative knowing we won't have another chance until next year!

[The10Eels]

I'd definitely wait Gwen!!!

[3andMe]

I never wait! I say go buy 20 tests and take 2 daily for the next 10 days. This is speaking as someone who never had a positive test until several days AFTER AF was due. Fingers crossed for you!

[daylilies]

Ooo Gwenn! Fingers crossed!

[missychrissy]

omg Gwenn!! I'm spit-the realistic side of me says to wait till AF is due...the part of me that knows what she would do in your situation says to buy the tests now!!!

[The10Eels]

Some of you may remember me posting that my friend got a call 3 years after her rape that she may need to go to court to testify against the guy??

She got a call from the DA today that she will be getting a subpoena to be in court next week!!! She's scared sh!tless, but I told her she has to do it to stop him.. or he will get away and just keep doing it.

[Bridget]

Gwenn! I can't wait until you poas. I hope this is it for you.
Ashley, your poor friend. I'm sure she just want to put it behind her.

[daylilies]

Your poor friend. I can't imaging having to recount the details of something like that.

[midgeend]

oooh gwenn. totally stalking you poasing.

ash - i'm sorry for your friend :(

[3andMe]

Midge! Congratulations! Time to change your ticker!

[3andMe]

Ash, I'm sorry for your friend, but I hope she gets some closure or satisfaction out of it. I was raped at 16 and the main regret I had afterward was that I wished I'd been able to save other girls from him.

[The10Eels]

Ash, I'm sorry for your friend, but I hope she gets some closure or satisfaction out of it. I was raped at 16 and the main regret I had afterward was that I wished I'd been able to save other girls from him.
I think this is the exact reason I feel like I need to encourage her to testify... Because I was too concerned with getting in trouble for being drunk ( I was 18) than reporting it when I was raped...:headbang:

[Gwenn]

Sorry for your friend, Ashley, but I do hope she can help prevent other girls from being in that same spot.

And :hugs: to you Ashley and Lydia.

I was at my parents all afternoon and evening and it's too late now to go buy tests. I'll see how I'm feeling tomorrow AM and maybe go buy a box tomorrow afternoon. Then see how long I can hold out.

[Bridget]

Between Savana and Kai I feel like I was up all night. Savana was coughing and said her ears hurt so I was up 4 times making her tea and giving her garlic oil drops. Then of course Kai was up his typical once nightly for a potty and drink of water. And obviously they staggered everything so it felt like just as I was falling back asleep, one of them was calling me. I slept in every bed in our house last night, and the couch. Dbf slept through it all. :truce: (yawn)

[missychrissy]

Oh Ashley. Your poor friend :( :hugs: To her. And you & Lydia as well.

[daylilies]

Sorry Bridget! Hope you get some rest soon.
DH has been waking up early (like even before Josh) so when Josh gets up he goes and hangs out with DH and I get to sleep. I love it! I mean, we're still only talking about sleeping until 7, but it's a lot better than 5:30 or 6 when Josh wakes up!

[AmeriBrit]

Sorry Bridget! Hope you get some rest soon.
DH has been waking up early (like even before Josh) so when Josh gets up he goes and hangs out with DH and I get to sleep. I love it! I mean, we're still only talking about sleeping until 7, but it's a lot better than 5:30 or 6 when Josh wakes up!

LOL, 7 does feel like a late morning when you have kids!

[sunrider]

I confess we did NOT make a baby on Father's Day. PHEW!
I don't remember ever being so happy to see AF. LOL

ETA: Though I'm not all that thrilled with the unusual cramping this month.

[sunrider]

Ash, I'm sorry for your friend, but I hope she gets some closure or satisfaction out of it. I was raped at 16 and the main regret I had afterward was that I wished I'd been able to save other girls from him.

Agreed. I would encourage her too. He needs to be stopped.

[missychrissy]

Whew Krista! I'm sure you're relieved!!

[stash]

I was never raped, but had an attempted rape from a kid (seriously, 17 year old) who then went on to break in to three other apartments and beat one of the girls in the head with a hammer before he raped her. I testified. I was the lucky one. :(

I confess that my dearest local friend has just found out she's pregnant after trying for a few months and I am so.stinking.excited for her. She's my age, so there's such risk, but oh.my.god. am I excited.

[Janeen]

I confess that I really suck at posting in this thread lately but I do read a lot. :hi:

[stash]

I also confess that I just had a huge bowl of adzuki beans for breakfast and it was the best. ever.

[Janeen]

I also confess that I just had a huge bowl of adzuki beans for breakfast and it was the best. ever.

I've never heard of them.

[stash]

They're tiny little red beans, usually used in Japanese cooking. I ate mine salted with sour cream and indian pickle. YUM.

[missychrissy]

I'm eating a plain tossed salad right now, and suddenly it's not covering it. You've made me hungry!

[missychrissy]

Well, not totally plain. I do have thousand island on it. But still...very lame by comparison.

[stash]

Beans are the most excellent food. :P

[Gwenn]

I confess AF is here. Early.

[missychrissy]

Aw shucks. :(

[3andMe]

Congratulations to your friend, Stacy! I hope she has a dream pregnancy!

Krista, whew!

Gwenn, I'm sorry to hear it.

Incidentally, for those of you who have changed your screen names to be more anonymous, should we avoid using your real names?

Bridget, sorry you had a rough night. I am waking up FAR more times a night for the twins than I am for my newborn, so don't worry that it will automatically be worse later on.

[Gwenn]

In my case I'm most worried about someone fining my old screen name through a google search and changed my username so I couldn't be found by searching the member list. For reasons I won't get into here, I'm not really worried about anyone just happening to see my posts through APA. Can't hurt to avoid my first name but I'm not hung up about it because I know it will get used and if it's just the first name I'm not that worried. If someone knows me well enough to read and examine my posts and figure out who I am they'll probably know with or without the first name.

[daylilies]

I don't really mind if you use my real name...I mostly just wanted something more interesting for my screen name.
Stacy...yuck for the rapist guy...
I was touched against my will when I was a teen...it wasn't sex but it was intimate touching. I told him to stop and he didn't right away.
He was a friend of my mom's friend (much younger though than my mom obviously) and my mom encouraged me to go out with him in the first place. He was a hairdresser at the place my mom and I went to for years. Bleh, it still grosses me out to think of him. I never told anyone what happened.

[daylilies]

Sooo...because I don't want to start a huge debate in Random, can someone tell me why someone would have an issue with things with characters on them for their kids? (I don't mind if you have an issue with it...I just can't figure out what the issue would be)

[missychrissy]

Uh....*crickets* I don't have any issues with them. People get strange ideas though, so who knows what goes on in their minds?

My sil wouldn't let her children wear sweat suits when they were infants. I was like, whatever floats your boat!

[Janeen]

:dunno:

[Gwenn]

I think I read the thread you're talking about. I don't have an issue with it here and there but I have to say it bothers me when a child has to have every single thing with a particular character on it, from clothing to toys to underwear to toothpaste. I just think it's commercialization gone too far and I would rather teach my kids (in the increasingly unlikely chance I ever have any) to look for a quality product over just seeing an ad and being brainwashed.

Like I said, though, I have no problem in and of itself with a character t-shirt or toy, its just when it becomes an obsession that it bothers me.

[Bridget]

Sooo...because I don't want to start a huge debate in Random, can someone tell me why someone would have an issue with things with characters on them for their kids? (I don't mind if you have an issue with it...I just can't figure out what the issue would be)
I'm just not into commercialism in general. I try to buy things that are unique and beautiful and that includes everything in my life, including clothing. If my kids really want something and it's within my price range (ie goodwill :winks:) I won't say no just because it has a character on it. Stuff like that is usually overpriced and not well made, in my opinion. Did you read through the thread? I thought it was pretty interesting to see everyone's take on it and without debate.

[daylilies]

Yeah, I thought it was interesting too. Thanks for the help with figuring it out :)

[Cosmosmom]

I didn't see the thread....but I'm ok with characters. I love me some Peanuts myself. :) and growing up my mom collected Cinderella things (not the cheap items but the nicer collector type things)....and my parents have a kind of Cinderella bedroom theme. My dad is a good sport. :laugh:

If I ever got to do a nursery, it's going to a Snoopy theme. I already have a few things for it before we realized it might not happen for us.

[Cosmosmom]

I confess...I'm soooo tired. Had to leave for work at 6:30 this morning. Normally it's more like 8:20 when I leave. :yawn:

[3andMe]

I don't like characters, but it's not because of the characters per se, just that I think it's kind of tacky. Same way I don't have bumper stickers on my car. I don't like displaying any kind of advertisement. I also like solid colors or calmer patterns. To me, a giant Spongebob on a t-shirt does not give me peace.

[shutterbird]

The only character stuff Lore owns are some PJs and undies. I don't buy character shirts. If she's ever had any (I can't recall any?), then they were given to her. I don't think they are THAT tacky, I just prefer to dress her in cuter, less mainstream clothing.

[shutterbird]

Oy, and HI everyone .I'm also a lurker. :hi:

Chrissy, best of luck! :hugs:

Big hugs :hugs: to Gwenn.

Stacy, I'm glad you're holding up! :vibes:

[daylilies]

Oh, I don't buy a lot of clothes with characters on them either. I mean like coloring books, or sheets.

[The10Eels]

Agreed. I would encourage her too. He needs to be stopped.
I confess it looks like I may be encouraging her in person... She called today for me to contact the DA's office as they have a subpoena for me to come testify.........

[Gwenn]

To me, a giant Spongebob on a t-shirt does not give me peace.

:lol: You have such a way with words! Nothing about Spongebob gives me peace!


I confess it looks like I may be encouraging her in person... She called today for me to contact the DA's office as they have a subpoena for me to come testify.........

:hugs: Good luck!

[Cosmosmom]

Eh, I'm probably just tacky. :laugh: My Dh would be the one wearing a cheesehead hat and was almost serious when he said we should do the house in green and gold. :shocker:
Not really me so much but I live with a big Packer/Brewer fan.


If we had a little boy, I know DH would buying all the Thomas the Train gear....because DH loves trains.
I just told DH the other day that we should go to farm and fleet and get some the blue and white stripped bibs...that he would look really cute in them (he has the hat). :winks:

Our xmas tree is full of Peanuts ornaments. My guest room
has one but will have two peanuts puzzles on the wall as art work (still need to do the other one but I already have the frame so the frames will match). I was really bummed when they changed Camp Snoopy at the Mall of America to some Nick theme thing.

and I have had and loved Mickey Mouse shirts or Hard Rock Cafe...they just don't fit so are in a box currently because I can't throw them away....I just loved them that much.

[Cosmosmom]

Nothing about Spongebob gives me peace!




ITA on that one! Spongebob is awful!

[Cosmosmom]

I confess...my DH likes the American Girl catalog. :laugh: I don't have a good reason to buy them but get the catalog....and when it comes in the mail he wants to look at it right away and talk about neat that stuff is and we both wish we had a daughter and a good reason to buy those things.

[Gwenn]

I confess...my DH likes the American Girl catalog. :laugh: I don't have a good reason to buy them but get the catalog....and when it comes in the mail he wants to look at it right away and talk about neat that stuff is and we both wish we had a daughter and a good reason to buy those things.

I have to admit I bought an American Girl doll for my niece once and I got their catalog after that ... and I confess I always read that thing cover to cover! If DH ever read it, though, he certainly didn't let me know about it.

[intactivstmom]

I started the character things thread, and I didn't want to say a lot since most people seemed ok with it, but I believe character toys hurt kids imaginations.

If you had two three year olds, each in a different room, and gave one of them a cowboy doll and the other a Woody doll (Toy Story) the kid with the cowboy doll would make up a name, history, and plot line for his cowboy. The kid with the Woody doll would reenact Toy Story, or make up his new plot line, but with all the details taken from the movie.

The first child is using more of his brain than the second child. The first child is also much more likely to do exploratory type play, where he acts out his own feelings, desires, thoughts, things he is thinking about but cannot do with his toys. Like having his toys 'be bad', pretending a toy died after experiencing a real loss, etc. Which is a very healthy activity and can help him work out things on his own instead of developing behavior problems. My friend's daughter had her dolls hit the new baby doll and give her away to the garbage man when her new brother came home, but after a few games like that warmed right up to her new baby. Observant parents can notice things kids do during play and then they know more about what the kids are going through.

Kids who only learn to mimic tv shows and movies are more likely to act out rather than act through the dolls. Like actually hitting the new baby.

I'm sure any character-buying mom will take offense to this and be sure to tell me that their child is imaginative and uses all of their brain and never hit their siblings. But I really feel everything I said is valid, and I wish I could find the research I've read that supports this so I could share.:pokey:

[intactivstmom]

Ok, I'm getting caught up. Midge, it was so hard for me to read your birth story. It was so perfect in every way I couldn't decide if I should congratulate you or stick my tongue out and throw myself a pity party. I guess I sound mean, huh? I should just say congratulations, and I am so happy you and Charlotte had such a beautiful experience.

Bridget, I really hope dbf is changing for real. You and your sweet children deserve a sweet so/daddy. :hugs:

Ash, sorry about your friend. But testifying can be so great. Aside from stopping the man, she will be taking her power back from him. It can be a big step from rape victim to rape survivor.

[Gwenn]

I started the character things thread, and I didn't want to say a lot since most people seemed ok with it, but I believe character toys hurt kids imaginations.

If you had two three year olds, each in a different room, and gave one of them a cowboy doll and the other a Woody doll (Toy Story) the kid with the cowboy doll would make up a name, history, and plot line for his cowboy. The kid with the Woody doll would reenact Toy Story, or make up his new plot line, but with all the details taken from the movie.

The first child is using more of his brain than the second child. The first child is also much more likely to do exploratory type play, where he acts out his own feelings, desires, thoughts, things he is thinking about but cannot do with his toys. Like having his toys 'be bad', pretending a toy died after experiencing a real loss, etc. Which is a very healthy activity and can help him work out things on his own instead of developing behavior problems. My friend's daughter had her dolls hit the new baby doll and give her away to the garbage man when her new brother came home, but after a few games like that warmed right up to her new baby. Observant parents can notice things kids do during play and then they know more about what the kids are going through.

Kids who only learn to mimic tv shows and movies are more likely to act out rather than act through the dolls. Like actually hitting the new baby.

I'm sure any character-buying mom will take offense to this and be sure to tell me that their child is imaginative and uses all of their brain and never hit their siblings. But I really feel everything I said is valid, and I wish I could find the research I've read that supports this so I could share.:pokey:

Really interesting. Thanks. If you ever find the research, please do share. I am very interested in learning more about the development of play in children.

[Bridget]

I started the character things thread, and I didn't want to say a lot since most people seemed ok with it, but I believe character toys hurt kids imaginations.

If you had two three year olds, each in a different room, and gave one of them a cowboy doll and the other a Woody doll (Toy Story) the kid with the cowboy doll would make up a name, history, and plot line for his cowboy. The kid with the Woody doll would reenact Toy Story, or make up his new plot line, but with all the details taken from the movie.

The first child is using more of his brain than the second child. The first child is also much more likely to do exploratory type play, where he acts out his own feelings, desires, thoughts, things he is thinking about but cannot do with his toys. Like having his toys 'be bad', pretending a toy died after experiencing a real loss, etc. Which is a very healthy activity and can help him work out things on his own instead of developing behavior problems. My friend's daughter had her dolls hit the new baby doll and give her away to the garbage man when her new brother came home, but after a few games like that warmed right up to her new baby. Observant parents can notice things kids do during play and then they know more about what the kids are going through.

Kids who only learn to mimic tv shows and movies are more likely to act out rather than act through the dolls. Like actually hitting the new baby.

I'm sure any character-buying mom will take offense to this and be sure to tell me that their child is imaginative and uses all of their brain and never hit their siblings. But I really feel everything I said is valid, and I wish I could find the research I've read that supports this so I could share.:pokey:
Well said and it makes perfect sense to me.

[daylilies]

I confess...my DH likes the American Girl catalog. :laugh: I don't have a good reason to buy them but get the catalog....and when it comes in the mail he wants to look at it right away and talk about neat that stuff is and we both wish we had a daughter and a good reason to buy those things.

I had Samantha when I was a kid, and before we had Josh, DH bought me another one. In case we have a girl, he said. I have no idea why he bought it before we even planned on having a baby. Now it kind of makes me sad, that it is for a girl that we we will likely never have. But I hope maybe my cousin will have a girl someday, or maybe even Josh will.
I liked all those things you said, Shannah. Those were some good points. Josh does have Buzz and Woody but most of his dolls are just stuffed animals.

[Bridget]

So my brother works at a preschool in a low income area. He has been there for several years and developed a strong friendship with of the moms there. She has two children whose father is in prison. My brother became sort of a "big brother" to her son who is now about 8. He's come on family camping trips with us and things like that and grown to know my parents pretty well. The mom is a hard working woman who struggles to make ends meet.
Last night I went to see my dad and noticed my mom's car was gone but didn't ask about it. Eventually he told me that he sold it. The woman I mentioned above, her car broke down for good. My dad sold her my mom's car for $10.

He is the best man I have ever known.

[AmeriBrit]

Wow, Bridget; your dad is a star! Don't you wish we had more people like him in this world?

We went to play group today and noticed there were 3 new kids there; I think they were all cousins as the 2 moms looked like sisters. They looked so poor; I felt so bad for them because they just really stood out as being poor...I know the parents probably don't want help or whatever but I felt like I wish there was something I could do to help them...not that we're loaded or anything, but I wish being poor didn't correlate so much to development, education, etc.

[missychrissy]

I confess it looks like I may be encouraging her in person... She called today for me to contact the DA's office as they have a subpoena for me to come testify.........

:hugs: What will you have to testify about?


So my brother works at a preschool in a low income area. He has been there for several years and developed a strong friendship with of the moms there. She has two children whose father is in prison. My brother became sort of a "big brother" to her son who is now about 8. He's come on family camping trips with us and things like that and grown to know my parents pretty well. The mom is a hard working woman who struggles to make ends meet.
Last night I went to see my dad and noticed my mom's car was gone but didn't ask about it. Eventually he told me that he sold it. The woman I mentioned above, her car broke down for good. My dad sold her my mom's car for $10.

He is the best man I have ever known.
Oh Bridget, your dad is awesome! I know you know that, but he is truly a wonderful person. He warms my heart. How's he doing?

As for the Woody doll scenario, I don't care what other people choose for their own lifestyle and I'm certainly not going to start a debate, but Bobbie and Jessica each had their own Woody dolls. They became their best friends, and we still have an old beaten up one laying around. They didn't mimic the movie at all...those dolls took on a life of their own and were made to do all sorts of clever, neat, funny things that had nothing to do with the movie. Woody didn't impact their imagination negatively at all.

[Bridget]

Chrissy, my dad has his ups and downs. We went to visit my mom's grave last night and a single rose had opened up on a plant that he put there earlier this week. He went over and was holding it in his hands and said, "I hope this means she's okay"
We all miss her so much but him most of all. It hurts my heart to think about him coming home to an empty house every night. :ohno:
As far as the Woody doll thing. I think, as with everything, it's a case of everything in moderation. My kids have a few things here and there. It's just that generally speaking we try to buy toys that are simple and allow for creative play. That doesn't only rule out character toys, but a lot of "bells and whistles" toys as well.

[missychrissy]

:hugs: to your dad. My heart really does break for him. And you too of course.

Woody was one of the few character toys they had. It wasn't that we were against them, but more that back then we couldn't afford them!

Conner does have a lot of Thomas the Train stuff. I love playing with him and them. But his all time favorite right now is dinosaurs. He watches Walking with Dinosaurs a lot and does mimic the motions of the dinos on the screen with his toys. He makes up stories about them and tells me all about their adventures. T-Rex is his best friend :wub:

[daylilies]

That's awesome Bridget. I feel sad for him.

[sunrider]

I confess...my DH likes the American Girl catalog. :laugh: I don't have a good reason to buy them but get the catalog....and when it comes in the mail he wants to look at it right away and talk about neat that stuff is and we both wish we had a daughter and a good reason to buy those things.

Wow. I'm only vaguely familiar with what American Girl is, but I find it intriguing that your DH likes it and wants a little girl. Cool.


My dad sold her my mom's car for $10.

He is the best man I have ever known.
Awwwww that's awesome.

Shanna, I see the point on creativity but I can also see getting a small number of character type toys if a kid just absolutely loves a particular one. A best friend Woody doll would be nice to have, so long as it was balanced out by other creative thinking, imagination type toys.

[missychrissy]

My girls are supposed to be building a 5-shelf bookcase today. I wonder how they'll do? :lol:

[stash]

Shannah, your points are well supported by waldorf. Check there. And I partially agree with them. Hand a kid movies and tv and a handful of character toys and he's unlikely to have the same CREATIVE imagination as his character toy "deprived" peer. But, to give credit to most (not all) parents, that's not usually what happens. Most kids get a mix of creative play toys and character toys. They're not stunted, they're healthy.

And, what waldorf, and perhaps you, don't take into consideration is what benefits there are to introducing scenarios via movie, tv, and character play. Example. If Oscar had nothing but his anatomically correct waldorf dolls, and hadn't seen toy story, would he have come up with a story where masha (one of the waldorf dolls) was flying through solar system model in his room on a jet pack? And would he have asked me to explain the physics and mechanics of jet packs? Probably not. :winks:

That said, I rarely buy character toys, and almost never clothing. Oscar doesn't ask for them, I don't like them (agree with lydia). But being an extremist on any side of any fence (especially in parenting) is dangerous territory.

Wait, I lied. Someone bought O a mikey doll from Disneyland. He uses as an inside ball :)

P.s. what UNbiased studies show is that children with access with a wide variety of toys show higher intellectual capability than those with limited access to toys. So. A kid with two waldorf dolls and some blocks is still at a disadvantage to the kid who sits in a room full of Disney.

[stash]

double post

[midgeend]

I don't like characters, but it's not because of the characters per se, just that I think it's kind of tacky. Same way I don't have bumper stickers on my car. I don't like displaying any kind of advertisement. I also like solid colors or calmer patterns. To me, a giant Spongebob on a t-shirt does not give me peace.

I'm like this too. My SIL handed down to me a whole bunch of pooh clothing and stuff, and I gave it all away, I don't honestly like any embellishment though...even those carter's things with embroidery, usually not a fan.

Bumper stickers and such - I reserve for my own business, and I have a "midwives help people out" sticker too.

But Annie does has character stuff, like Elmo coloring books, and an Elmo doll. She also has a bunch of generic babies.



Ok, I'm getting caught up. Midge, it was so hard for me to read your birth story. It was so perfect in every way I couldn't decide if I should congratulate you or stick my tongue out and throw myself a pity party. I guess I sound mean, huh? I should just say congratulations, and I am so happy you and Charlotte had such a beautiful experience.



I can totally understand that Shannah. You can stick your tongue out at me - I know you struggled terribly, and I hope that you can have a more peaceful experience next time. You deserve it.




Shanna, I see the point on creativity but I can also see getting a small number of character type toys if a kid just absolutely loves a particular one. A best friend Woody doll would be nice to have, so long as it was balanced out by other creative thinking, imagination type toys.

ITA with this.

[daylilies]

Midge, that midwives bumper sticker made me laugh! Love it!
Urrgh I was expecting one mom and one kid for the playdate and another one just called and said 4 more people are coming...in 45 minutes LOL
What is it with people not planning ahead?
I'm jealous of people with good birth experiences too...It's not a huge deal to me but sometimes I would have loved to have a serene, loving experience.

[missychrissy]

I know I should know this, and that I'm being a bit obsessive about my weight, but I'm watching every pound and I'd like to know when we're at our heaviest during our cycle? Is it just prior to AF, during? Somewhere in the middle?

[Cosmosmom]

I have to admit I bought an American Girl doll for my niece once and I got their catalog after that ... and I confess I always read that thing cover to cover! If DH ever read it, though, he certainly didn't let me know about it.
We haven't gotten anything though I almost bought him something last year...the girl of the year had a pet llama and DH has a thing for llamas.
I just love those bitty babies and all the accessories...OMG I would have died for that when I was little but these got popular after I was too old already.
He likes the historical girls and their pets....especially when the little dog even has an elizabethian collar! I think that he likes the details and the history.

[Cosmosmom]

I started the character things thread, and I didn't want to say a lot since most people seemed ok with it, but I believe character toys hurt kids imaginations.

If you had two three year olds, each in a different room, and gave one of them a cowboy doll and the other a Woody doll (Toy Story) the kid with the cowboy doll would make up a name, history, and plot line for his cowboy. The kid with the Woody doll would reenact Toy Story, or make up his new plot line, but with all the details taken from the movie.



It's all good to have your beliefs. No offense here!
I do have to say though I was a big time Ariel fan (I was older than three when that came out). One of our favorite games out in the pool was mermaids. And while we got started there, it always took on a life of it's own.
I would personally only see it as a problem if EVERYTHING a kid had was a character thing. It's all about balance and moderation. :)

[midgeend]

We haven't gotten anything though I almost bought him something last year...the girl of the year had a pet llama and DH has a thing for llamas.
I just love those bitty babies and all the accessories...OMG I would have died for that when I was little but these got popular after I was too old already.
He likes the historical girls and their pets....especially when the little dog even has an elizabethian collar! I think that he likes the details and the history.

Annie was just given an itty bitty baby for a big sis present - it's so cute...not something I could ever have afforded myself...so I'm happy my SIL has the $$ to spend on her. :bellyrubs:

[Cosmosmom]

, but a lot of "bells and whistles" toys as well.
Now that I'm on board with. I HATE toys that do everything for you. I won't buy those kind of toys for my cousins.

[Cosmosmom]

Wow. I'm only vaguely familiar with what American Girl is, but I find it intriguing that your DH likes it and wants a little girl. Cool.
.
Yeah we would easily take a boy...but deep down there is a slight preference for a girl. His thought is that a girl can do anything a boy can but a boy can't do everything a girl can (a lot of things sure like cooking and cleaning are for both genders but we wouldn't say put a boy in a dress or grow long hair for pigtails). But DH could do trains with a girl or teach her to play chess or watch football with him.

[Cosmosmom]

My girls are supposed to be building a 5-shelf bookcase today. I wonder how they'll do? :lol:
LOL My dad when a teen started out building a dresser...eventually ended up being a bread board. :laugh: Eventually though when older he made my cradle :wub: and they still have it for my sister or I to use someday hopefully.
That first big project has to start somewhere though!

[Cosmosmom]

P.s. what UNbiased studies show is that children with access with a wide variety of toys show higher intellectual capability than those with limited access to toys. So. A kid with two waldorf dolls and some blocks is still at a disadvantage to the kid who sits in a room full of Disney.

I think that is interesting....I have done some research into video games myself. Another thing that can be good in moderation but not if taken into obession. But some video gaming can lead to better surgeons, especially those doing laproscopic surgery or using the DaVinci robot.

[Cosmosmom]

Chrissy I don't know. But this might be TMI but here it goes anyway. I one day was a bit bloated feeling, nothing too unusual though. I got my weight on the wii fit and than did 5 minutes of hooping...that is it! The hooping, um expelled some gas I didn't even realize was waiting....just for kickes I weighed again in just five minutes I lost .9 of a lb. :laugh:
So really a little bit of gas, needing to use the bathroom, a little water retention...could easily be several pounds that could change quickly.

[missychrissy]

I'm sure mine is AF related. I was on a steady decline in lbs and then suddenly halted...I wasn't worried about it, but then the next day AF showed her ugly head so I'm assuming that is why my decline ended. And yes, I'm hoping that I'll lose another 2-3 lbs water weight. :D

[stash]

I'm always 5 pounds heavier the day before AF. I literally lose 5 pounds in one day. Every month. :shock:

[missychrissy]

Good to know Stacy. That's how I thought it would work...build up right before, and release. Nasty. lol

[3andMe]

I'm always 5 pounds heavier the day before AF. I literally lose 5 pounds in one day. Every month. :shock:

Same here!

And speaking of character vs non-character toys and imagination, my sister and I never had any commercial or character toys. Most of ours were handmade, or hand-me-downs from our parents (you should see the ratty 60-year-old teddy bear I still have). Although my sister and I played imaginatively a lot, we still did things like name our rag dolls after Ozma in the Oz series, and the Ozmas did a lot of things we picked up from the books. So even though they weren't commercial toys, and looked more like socks than princesses, we still used plots we were familiar with. I don't think there's any escape from it.

[intactivstmom]

Bridget, I am seriously jealous of your dad. He sounds awesome.

I love your midwife bumper sticker, Midge.

Somebody who charts their cycles should weigh themselves everyday for a few cycles and see if they notice any trends in weight gain/loss.

Maybe this is tmi, but there are a few days every month where I queef a lot, so I'm going to start marking those days on my chart see if they are ovulation queefs or something :laugh:

And ita about moderation in everything. I think that if the boy with the generic cowboy watches all the Toy Story movies all the time, the most imaginative thing he will do is imagine his cowboy is Woody. If the second boy has never seen Toy Story, or only seen it once or twice, he might use his Woody as a regular cowboy. So more than keep certain toys from my kids I hope to encourage a lifestyle that encourages imaginative play. Limit tv time, limit character and electronic toys, lots of reading, and lots of time on the floor playing and interacting with my kids, going to parks and museums (where we can learn about jet pakcs :winks: ) and just showing them what an amazing place the world is. but if he really wants a Woody doll I get him one, and if they are best friends I'll be just as happy as I would if his generic cowboy was his bff.

My cousins watch a lot of tv and movies, they own a lot of character toys. The only generic toys they had were barbies, but then they got all the barbie movies. They are smart kids, they are cute and I love them. But I don't enjoy spending time with them, they are not very fun, or funny, and being with them gets old quickly. Sometimes I think their parents get bored with them too, which is why the amount of tv time they get increases so much :ohno:

[Bridget]

I've been so touched my human kindness lately. I got a huge, totally stunning bouquet of flowers from dbf's sister's husband's sister in Canada. I have only met her the two times we traveled there but her and I kind of hit it off right away and drank a lot of wine together one night. I was so surprised and every time I look at the flowers it warms my heart.

Last night I was looking through my mom's sympathy cards and I found one from my kindergarten teacher! It was to my dad and said she saw in the paper that my mom had passed and was so sad. That she remembered my mom's smile and that she was always one of her "favorite parents" back when she "had the pleasure of teaching your children".

One of my really good friends has a housemate that I met about a year ago. The only time I have ever spent with her is the once every few months that I go to see my friend and she is always there and hangs out with us. She's really lovely and I like her a lot. She has some prints in her house by this artist that I always comment on when I go there. Well she found out that I am pregnant and bought me a baby journal by that artist called, First 1000 Days.

I love it when I am rejuvinated by the human spirit.

[daylilies]

That's nice that you have so many people to support you, Bridget.

[missychrissy]

I think it's because you get back what you put into the world. You're genuinely a nice, sweet person and people cannot help but want to show their support of you. As with your parents. I know where you got it from. :wub:

[Bean]

Sometimes I feel like my life is going nowhere. I'm so ready to start the next part of my life, whatever that may be, but I'm stuck. Before I got pregnant I was looking at jobs (but not sure if I could put my kids in daycare). I really want to buy a house but we know we won't be in AK forever. I feel like there's something I should be doing that I'm not. DH keeps saying "but you're pregnant! That's doing something!" Well, yes. That's doing something very important! But it's doing something that I've been doing for the past 5 years since I got pregnant with Lola- working on my family. Not to say I want to STOP working on my family, because I don't. I just feel like I've been at this same place for too long and it's time to start the next adventure. Of course, that's going to be a lot harder now that I'll have three kids to take care of, not that it was ever easy with DH being in the military and causing our lives to be in a permanent state of unknowing, but it will be harder. I'm wondering if maybe I'm just not looking hard enough or setting my goals high enough.

[missychrissy]

:hugs: Only you can decide what you want to be when you grow up (so to speak) but if you're feeling the urge to move forward for yourself, then I encourage you to start looking. Even if that means just taking 1-2 classes online at a time for now. At least you'd be moving in a direction and maybe that would stem the 'stuck' feeling you're having now.

You can absolutely continue working on your family and yourself at the same time. It's my belief that I'm a better mother because I have fulfillment outside of my mother and wife duties. I know not everyone is geared that way, but I'm just letting you know that it is possible. Don't think that you have to sacrifice your family to grow yourself.

[stephmama]

I think it's because you get back what you put into the world. You're genuinely a nice, sweet person and people cannot help but want to show their support of you. As with your parents. I know where you got it from. :wub:


Absolutely. :wub:

[shutterbird]

I think it's because you get back what you put into the world. You're genuinely a nice, sweet person and people cannot help but want to show their support of you. As with your parents. I know where you got it from. :wub:

Exactly!

I love seeing people be decent, kind, and considerate for a change!

[shutterbird]

I confess that I'm kind of annoyed with DH. Not too much, but I hate that he won't stand up for himself and what he believes in. He was working with another apprentice yesterday who brought up the topic of conversation. From what DH told me, it sounds like he was preaching to him, especially after DH told him he wasn't religious. ("I said that I believe in God, but only to shut him up. Then I went on to say 'but I'm not religious. I don't go to church or anything.'") Apparently that opened the flood gates.

Argh! I hate people harping on my DH. He's such a mellow, passive kind of guy. He wouldn't be able to tell him to STFU even if he wanted to... wish I was there. :laugh:

[Gwenn]

Bridget, that is SO sweet about your DH selling the car. And I'm glad people are showing you love and support in this time.

To add a final two cents on the play thing, I think in the end it all comes down to limiting television time and providing as much time reading, exploring, and creating as possible. I do think just sitting in front of a television all the time stunts creativity (although I agree with Stash that to an extent it does open the mind to new concepts and experiences).

[missychrissy]

I confess that I'm kind of annoyed with DH. Not too much, but I hate that he won't stand up for himself and what he believes in. He was working with another apprentice yesterday who brought up the topic of conversation. From what DH told me, it sounds like he was preaching to him, especially after DH told him he wasn't religious. ("I said that I believe in God, but only to shut him up. Then I went on to say 'but I'm not religious. I don't go to church or anything.'") Apparently that opened the flood gates.

Argh! I hate people harping on my DH. He's such a mellow, passive kind of guy. He wouldn't be able to tell him to STFU even if he wanted to... wish I was there. :laugh:

:( He really should say something. It doesn't have to be mean, but it's really inappropriate for that guy to be going on like that.

[missychrissy]

My 4 kids are going to see Toy Story 3 tonight :D

[intactivstmom]

I think it's because you get back what you put into the world. You're genuinely a nice, sweet person and people cannot help but want to show their support of you. As with your parents. I know where you got it from. :wub:

This says it perfectly.



Sometimes I feel like my life is going nowhere. I'm so ready to start the next part of my life, whatever that may be, but I'm stuck. Before I got pregnant I was looking at jobs (but not sure if I could put my kids in daycare). I really want to buy a house but we know we won't be in AK forever. I feel like there's something I should be doing that I'm not. DH keeps saying "but you're pregnant! That's doing something!" Well, yes. That's doing something very important! But it's doing something that I've been doing for the past 5 years since I got pregnant with Lola- working on my family. Not to say I want to STOP working on my family, because I don't. I just feel like I've been at this same place for too long and it's time to start the next adventure. Of course, that's going to be a lot harder now that I'll have three kids to take care of, not that it was ever easy with DH being in the military and causing our lives to be in a permanent state of unknowing, but it will be harder. I'm wondering if maybe I'm just not looking hard enough or setting my goals high enough.

:hugs: I don't have any advice. I feel completely fulfilled as a mommy, but I've only been doing it for a year. :) Maybe take some online classes. You can go at your own pace and work around being a mommy, and learn something new.

[Ky'sMom]

Bridget your dad seems like such a great guy and it is so wonderful that you are being shown such kindness. I know when I'm shown some kindness when dealing with some of life's stresses, it is very refreshing and renewing for me.


:hugs: Only you can decide what you want to be when you grow up (so to speak) but if you're feeling the urge to move forward for yourself, then I encourage you to start looking. Even if that means just taking 1-2 classes online at a time for now. At least you'd be moving in a direction and maybe that would stem the 'stuck' feeling you're having now.

You can absolutely continue working on your family and yourself at the same time. It's my belief that I'm a better mother because I have fulfillment outside of my mother and wife duties. I know not everyone is geared that way, but I'm just letting you know that it is possible. Don't think that you have to sacrifice your family to grow yourself.

Wanted to say ITA with above. I also believe that a woman needs fulfillment outside of her family duties, especially motherly duties. I know a lot of women in my own family whose children grow up and they are just lost and depressed and such so I feel it is very important to have other interests. I know that children aren't children forever so I try to enjoy them as much as I possibly can with the knowledge that they will soon grow up and go one about their own lives. In the meantime I want to develop and grow my own self as well. I wish you luck!!


My 4 kids are going to see Toy Story 3 tonight :D

I want to go see it and so does Ky. He only recently watched Toy Story 2. We don't watch many movies or TV and don't have cable but we do have a lot of action figures so I don't see any thing wrong with characters. I guess I never thought about them since my brother and I played with a lot of Thundercats and He-man and She-ra and Transformer figures when we were kids. I have a freakish memory and we rarely had them play out scenes of the cartoons. We also created our own imaginary world though, my name was Ka-chi LOL we were really imaginitive and we watched WAY more TV than my kids do. Ky is really imaginative too, but he does have some friends who constantly watch the afrorementioned Sponge-Bob and those kids really get on my nerves constantly telling me about Sponge Bob and his assortment of friends and all their play revolves around Sponge Bob so I can see how watching a show/movie constantly and only having toys about those characters can make children less imaginitive.

Erin

[shutterbird]

TS3 was cute! Lorelai loved it and I cried at the end. I had to keep reminding myself that it was about TOYS. :laugh:

[Cosmosmom]

I had a She-ra Princess of Power doll. :) DH still has some of his old transformers even though they don't transform all that great anymore. LOL

[daylilies]

Yeah, I was going to say, make sure your kids bring tissues, Chrissy! I know it's about toys...but it almost makes me feel bad for them, you know? I want to keep every single toy Josh gets now, LOL
Cass, I agree with whoever said you should go for trying something new. Even something simple like an online class or a new hobby or something can really open doors.

[Bean]

The sad thing is, I took some online classes last summer and I hated it. I've always really liked school, I don't want to feel that way about it. But it was just not fun at all.

At this point, I'd just be happy with a vacation. We're going home in August. We'll see how that goes. But I think seeing all those people, my family and friends, will just remind me that I don't have a normal life and won't for a while. I think I'm just sort of "over" the army right now. I'm tired of them dictating MY life.

[daylilies]

That must stink, Cass.
By the way I keep meaning to tell you I really like your sig. :D

[daylilies]

I really like online classes because I don't have to be around people who don't want to be there, or deal with any distractions (besides the ones at home LOL). I took that one writing class and I don't know if this is typical of adult online classes but she really didn't give any feedback. She loved everything everyone wrote LOL I feel like I learned some things from the other people taking the class though, because there were some really good writers.

[The10Eels]

Cass - I wish I was still up there so we could be mommy friends IRL.

Bridget - Your dad is amazing! I totally agree with the "You get back what you put into the world" thing. You are truly an amazing woman, and from the stories of your parents, we can all see exactly where that came from!

Chrissy - I'd be testifying about seeing the guy at the party we were at, etc.. I was the one who took my friend to the hospital when she came running inside bawling her eyes out.. etc.

I confess B missed his court date earlier this week and now has a warrant out for his arrest. and apparently also lost his job, and was kicked out of the place he was living.....

I sure know how to pick em, huh?

[daylilies]

Oh man!
I think there are so few good men out there, it's inevitable that most of us are going to end up with losers. The upside is that you cut him loose already. LOL Think I'm cynical much?

[Bridget]

I think it's because you get back what you put into the world. You're genuinely a nice, sweet person and people cannot help but want to show their support of you. As with your parents. I know where you got it from. :wub:
Thank you for saying this. :wub:

[missychrissy]

TS3 was cute! Lorelai loved it and I cried at the end. I had to keep reminding myself that it was about TOYS. :laugh:

Bobbie and Sydney cried, but Jessica and Conner did not. Jess & Conner take after their father :P They all had a really great time and Conner was perfect for his sisters. I'm so happy for them,


The sad thing is, I took some online classes last summer and I hated it. I've always really liked school, I don't want to feel that way about it. But it was just not fun at all.

At this point, I'd just be happy with a vacation. We're going home in August. We'll see how that goes. But I think seeing all those people, my family and friends, will just remind me that I don't have a normal life and won't for a while. I think I'm just sort of "over" the army right now. I'm tired of them dictating MY life.

:hugs:


Chrissy - I'd be testifying about seeing the guy at the party we were at, etc.. I was the one who took my friend to the hospital when she came running inside bawling her eyes out.. etc.

I confess B missed his court date earlier this week and now has a warrant out for his arrest. and apparently also lost his job, and was kicked out of the place he was living.....

I sure know how to pick em, huh?

Ugh-I can only imagine how awful that must have been for you both. You're a great friend.

However B is now is no reflection on you. You got out. That shows smarts and bravery. Many women stay with men like that for 30 or more years because they're afraid to leave. I admire your courage.


Thank you for saying this. :wub:

I meant it.

I confess my 1st box of nicotine patches came in. I tentatively have Monday as my quit date...but I'm afraid I'll start gaining weight. I've ran and watched my calories for the past 3 years. I started 3/07 at 175-ish (I saw 17# & looked away because I was so horrified at that number) and got down to 150-160. I bounced between 150 & 160 for the last year and a half. I only dropped to 142 in the past 2 months, and I think it's the smoking. I honestly don't know if I'll stay quit if my weight starts climbing back up.

I know it's stupid, but that's how I feel. I keep telling myself that I've been better about watching calories this time, and I'm running further than I used to, but that little voice in my head is telling me the cigarettes are helping with appetite suppressing.

[daylilies]

You can do it Chrissy!
The playgroup was great this morning. Everyone loved the house and the yard, and the kids had so much fun. After that, Josh and I went to a farmer's market and a little store that does baked goods. Desserts are not my thing but we had a cookie at the market that was so good, I wanted to check out the store that makes them. They do really cute cakes and stuff.

[missychrissy]

It sounds like a wonderful day all round!

[daylilies]

It really was a good day. It's exhausting to stay busy like that all day (we did other stuff besides the playgroup and market) but it really helps Josh be in a better mood if I keep him going. He gets so bored if we hang around the house and he tells me "I can't beside (decide) what to do Mommy, you beside." LOL

[missychrissy]

lol...that's so cute! Conner is the same way. If we're not constantly doing 'something' he starts picking on his sisters. Sometimes not in a nice, cute way either.

I tried on jeans last night, and fit a 7. I'm very happy about that...I didn't buy any though because they didn't have any I liked, but just knowing I could fit a 7 made my week.

[midgeend]

Chrissy, we should go shopping together once I get this baby weight off :) Obviously not in Ithaca, since there's all of 2 stores to shop in here.


You are so going to be able to quit smoking. You are such a strong confident woman, at least that's how I read you :)

[AmeriBrit]

I got in to an argument with my mother over whether dogs have souls or not....lol...our chihuahua who is 17 (and lives in AR with my parents) is nearing the end of her days, so my mom was telling me about how sad she was about it and how she was sad she didn't have a soul so she wouldn't see her in heaven. I asked her who told her dogs didn't have souls so she said "the preacher" so we got in to an argument over listening to preachers....lol...seriously, though, I'm so sad to be losing my dog but she has had a good life. I'll probably cry once she is gone, though.

[Gwenn]

If I have a soul, my dogs do too. Plain and simple.

I'm so sorry about your chihuahua.

[daylilies]

Sorry about your doggie :( Glad she had a good life though!

[missychrissy]

Chrissy, we should go shopping together once I get this baby weight off :) Obviously not in Ithaca, since there's all of 2 stores to shop in here.


You are so going to be able to quit smoking. You are such a strong confident woman, at least that's how I read you :)

Thank you. :D And I'd LOVE to go shopping with you!


I got in to an argument with my mother over whether dogs have souls or not....lol...our chihuahua who is 17 (and lives in AR with my parents) is nearing the end of her days, so my mom was telling me about how sad she was about it and how she was sad she didn't have a soul so she wouldn't see her in heaven. I asked her who told her dogs didn't have souls so she said "the preacher" so we got in to an argument over listening to preachers....lol...seriously, though, I'm so sad to be losing my dog but she has had a good life. I'll probably cry once she is gone, though.

Ugh-this is a big reason why I can't have conversations with religious people. I mean, come on! Really?


If I have a soul, my dogs do too. Plain and simple.

I'm so sorry about your chihuahua.
Agreed. And I too am sorry about your chihuahua.

[missychrissy]

Why do people insist America was founded on Christianity? What do you say when that comes up? Is it worth the effort to argue?

[stash]

Tell the buggers that America was founded on FREEDOM, one of the bits included freedom of RELIGION (not Christianity) and that includes the freedom to say F you there is no God. :winks:

[Bridget]

I cannot stop eating avacados. It's all I think about. I put it on top of everything or just eat it with a spoon. :bellyrubs:
I took the kids to the zoo today. I was up early and getting ready to go, planned to meet my dad there when dbf started getting ready too. I actually assumed that he wasn't going to go and felt a little like I didn't want him to go because so often when he comes with us everything has to revolve around him. If he's too hot, or too hungry or too bored, he cuts it short. I kept telling him he didn't have to come and finally I just said, "If you come with us, I really need you to make it all about the kids. I really like to just go with the flow and when you come with us it feels like we the whole day revolves around your needs."
He actually said okay. And he actually did it. I only had to tell him to chill once.
I think the lesson here is that if I have to point blank tell him what's up ahead of time.

[Bridget]

I got in to an argument with my mother over whether dogs have souls or not....lol...our chihuahua who is 17 (and lives in AR with my parents) is nearing the end of her days, so my mom was telling me about how sad she was about it and how she was sad she didn't have a soul so she wouldn't see her in heaven. I asked her who told her dogs didn't have souls so she said "the preacher" so we got in to an argument over listening to preachers....lol...seriously, though, I'm so sad to be losing my dog but she has had a good life. I'll probably cry once she is gone, though.
Aw, sorry about your dog.

[daylilies]

Ooh, I like what you said to him. Mind if I steal it?
Whenever DH goes with us somewhere, it's all about what direction he wants to go in, what stores he wants to see, when he wants to leave, etc. When just I go out with Josh I usually let him do what he wants for however long he wants. And it goes a lot better.

[The10Eels]

Wow Bridget!! I really hope these changes are for real!!

[Gwenn]

So I stopped at Starbucks on the way home and bought an iced coffee and a snack. The total was $6.66. I think this must be my official notification that I'm a heathen!

[stash]

Bridget, what happened to him in Vegas? I am so happy for you that he seems to be getting his act together, but the cynic in me wants to know when the other boot will drop. Am I an asshole friend for saying that?

Avocados sprinkled with salt and a squeeze of lemon. YUM.

I confess that I don't know WTF is going to happen with my business when I have Gus. I know I'll work it out, don't get me wrong, but we've just gotten mega busy again and the idea of real maternity leave is now totally laughable. I can subcontract some of the work, but not all, and we'll definitely be traveling again by the time he's three months. We'll take the whole family with, but it's overwhelming me to think about, so I'm trying not to think about it. My new client just gave us our first project and it involves my going to Denver end of next month to facilitate a major meeting and I'm torn. It's a huge opportunity, and of COURSE I'll do it, but like I'll be 7 months pregnant. I actually have to buy clothes I'll only wear ONCE. :eyeroll:

[midgeend]

Hmm.... Can you afford a Nanny? Sometimes, like an Au Pair or something, would jump at the opportunity to be traveling with a family...work related or not, it's a chance for them to visit other cities while they have their down time. I know that's probably prohibitively expensive, but maybe??

I got out of the house yesterday - it was heavenly...although there were people who thought I was nuts to be at a toddler's birthday party 4 days post par tum. I personally feel like the days leading up to delivery are more taxing than the days after. But that's just me!

[stash]

I agree Midge, I felt golden after birth (if a little tired).

We could afford a nanny, but I'll be really honest. I totally resist the thought of consistent "child care" for the kids. I feel like if I have to do that, I need to slow down work instead. My (our, really, my DH agrees) primary job is to be their primary caregiver. If we're paying someone else to do it, the model's all wrong.

I may have my SIL tag along. Free vacation for her, a little extra help around the edges for us.

[stash]

And YAY for getting out of the house!

[Bridget]

Stacy, believe me, I am thinking the exact same thing. If he proves me wrong, so be it.
And I'm wondering how I am going to run my daycare immediately after I have my baby. I'm just not sure I can swing it and I don't know what to do. I've considered finding a sub but I'm not sure I'd ever find the right person. And the pay would be crap since I'd still be buying and preparing the meals and I'm hardly making a profit as it is. It might actually be perfect for a stay at home mom looking to make a *little extra money and bring their child along. We shall see.

[stash]

I think your solution sounds good. Find someone to be there who'd like a little extra money but isn't looking for it as a total solution?

[midgeend]

Stacy, believe me, I am thinking the exact same thing. If he proves me wrong, so be it.
And I'm wondering how I am going to run my daycare immediately after I have my baby. I'm just not sure I can swing it and I don't know what to do. I've considered finding a sub but I'm not sure I'd ever find the right person. And the pay would be crap since I'd still be buying and preparing the meals and I'm hardly making a profit as it is. It might actually be perfect for a stay at home mom looking to make a *little extra money and bring their child along. We shall see.


As a stay at home mom, who is always hoping to find a way to make a little extra money, I would LOVE a situation like yours. It's not a permanent job, so it would allow someone to make a few extra bucks to save for christmas or something, without being a total commitment. I would be able to bring my own kids, and so the pay, not being great isn't much of an issue. I love temporary babysitting gigs.

[missychrissy]

So I stopped at Starbucks on the way home and bought an iced coffee and a snack. The total was $6.66. I think this must be my official notification that I'm a heathen!

lol...Bobbie has 666 in her social security number. She thinks she's doomed :laugh: (not really-she's non-superstitious)

I'm sure you both will find solutions that work, Stacy & Bridget. You both smart and capable and these things do seem to work themselves out. So maybe you'll slow down for a period Stacy. And Bridget, I agree that getting extra help won't be a big issue. I know people who work at home daycare positions (or have), and they usually have something going on in their life that makes it difficult for them to have a regular part time job. Whether they did it for childcare experience while they were going to college for child development, or between semesters or years at college, or being a stay at home mom looking for a few extra bucks...there are all sorts of people out there and I have no doubt you'll find a good fit.

I have to admit...I wonder what happened in Vegas too. :( I sincerely hope he's just waking up and realizing what he has and that he hasn't been stepping up to the plate much and is trying to remedy that.

[intactivstmom]

Stacy, believe me, I am thinking the exact same thing. If he proves me wrong, so be it.
And I'm wondering how I am going to run my daycare immediately after I have my baby. I'm just not sure I can swing it and I don't know what to do. I've considered finding a sub but I'm not sure I'd ever find the right person. And the pay would be crap since I'd still be buying and preparing the meals and I'm hardly making a profit as it is. It might actually be perfect for a stay at home mom looking to make a *little extra money and bring their child along. We shall see.

I'm assuming that you have a business license and you are an accredited day care. Would you be able to hire somebody? Dh can't hire somebody for his home based business, but maybe day care would be different. If you could hire them what about workman's comp, payroll taxes, unemployment insurance etc.
Not trying to discourage you, I just don't want you to be 40 weeks pregnant and figure out that hiring somebody won't work.
Of course hiring somebody off the books would work too, so maybe you don't have to worry about any of that.

[missychrissy]

Oh what a hot day! I don't know if it's the humidity or what, but it feels hotter today than it did a few weeks ago when it was pushing 90. I'm not complaining, I love it. But I'm just surprised at how much I'm sweating by doing nothing. My only complaint is how much everyone else around me is complaining. I'm still not putting the air conditioners in though. :D

We had a busy busy day. I took the girls to the Ithaca mall so Bobbie could submit job applications. It took forever! I hate shopping.

[missychrissy]

On a humorous note, I mentioned to Rich that Aunt Flo was visiting the other day and Conner heard me. He looked at Rich and said, "I want to see Aunt Flo!"

:lol: Rich let me explain that one...I just said Mommy was kidding, no one is here. :D I have to be more careful!

[MammaMia]

As a stay at home mom, who is always hoping to find a way to make a little extra money, I would LOVE a situation like yours. It's not a permanent job, so it would allow someone to make a few extra bucks to save for christmas or something, without being a total commitment. I would be able to bring my own kids, and so the pay, not being great isn't much of an issue. I love temporary babysitting gigs.

Yep, I would have loved that too when I was a SAHM. I hope you can find a solution, Bridget.


On a humorous note, I mentioned to Rich that Aunt Flo was visiting the other day and Conner heard me. He looked at Rich and said, "I want to see Aunt Flo!"

:lol: Rich let me explain that one...I just said Mommy was kidding, no one is here. :D I have to be more careful!

:laugh:

I confess that I'm sooo annoyed right now. I misunderstood the wording on the university website, and thought I had until June 30 to get all my documents in. Nope. The cut-off was June 11. :headbang: :headbang:

Oh well. I'll just have to apply again next semester.

[missychrissy]

Oh no! They won't make an exception?

[3andMe]

Stacy, if you ever need to come out here, I'll watch them for you if you can time it right for my days off. And I wish I still had some of my professional maternity outfits to send to you.

Sarah, I'm really sorry about the deadline. Chrissy is right--there is no harm in at least calling. With the economy the way it has been the past few years, people and businesses are much more willing to make exceptions for paying customers.

Bridget, I'm sure you'll find something that will work, but I have to confess that your daycare was probably the third thing I thought of when you said you were pregnant, so I'm sure it's got to be weighing on you a little bit.

[daylilies]

Lydia, Claire looks just gorgeous in your sig!
Sorry about the deadline Sarah. Call just in case!

[Bridget]

Lydia - you have me curious as to what the first two thing you thought were?
I am starting to tell people in real life that I'm expecting and everyone is so thrilled. I don't know why I expected people to be like :eyebrow:. I especially wondered what my close girlfriends, the only ones who know my struggles with dbf, would say. But they are all thrilled and seem to have complete faith that I am going to be just fine no matter what. Sometimes I feel like I give off a vibe of being much stronger than I feel.

We took the kids to Toy Story 3 and I sobbed. :eyeroll:
I have a feeling Savana will never get rid of a toy again. Seriously.

[daylilies]

I sobbed at Toy Story 3 too!
I think you do come off as very strong and confident.

[missychrissy]

Bridget, real bravery is going forward despite your fears. You're the bravest person I know. And I have no doubt you're strong. You prove it every day.

Me-I'm a wimp. :D I've been covering McGraw 2 days a week for a 90 day trial thing, and we have a meeting later this week to discuss the future of McGraw IT coverage. I'm scared they're going to say it's a more permanent thing, and I just want it to end. I want to be back "home" in my own office in Goldwin Smith. I know the people there. I know the network and the procedures. I know what I'm doing (sorta) there.

[missychrissy]

Oh-Bobbie & Sydney cried at Toy Story 3. Conner covered his eyes, and Jessica snorted & said, "They're just toys." Jess is her father's daughter. :D

[stash]

Chrissy, I confess I have no idea what you're talking about. It's either that I miss pages of this thread sometimes or that I never watch the news? :dunno:

I'm not taking O to see Toy Story anytime soon after the reviews. Why? Because his birthday is next month and I'm about to try to cull the toys that have been building up for the past four years to make some sense of the madness in our house. We have toys in every CORNER.

That said, yesterday we had a big reorganization project - went and bought O a new dresser and gave him the "big bed" in the guest room, along with my favorite rocking chair and a new bookshelf, so that we could "steal" his furniture for the Gus's room. I have an instant-nursery now and it's a little weird to look in there and realize I'm going to have another baby soon. :shocker:

Oscar is so thrilled. He kept saying last night that his "new room is wonnnnnnderful" and said that Gus's room is also so wonderful he doesn't know where he wants to sleep. :wub:

This helped make things real for him, I think. He got all the good books in his room and Gus got all the baby and board books in his room. That was a big deal to Oscar, and to know that they're going to share but that he gets to have the cool stuff because he's big and smart :laugh:

[stash]

I also confess that I RARELY post anywhere else anymore but in here.

[sunrider]

Yeah we would easily take a boy...but deep down there is a slight preference for a girl. His thought is that a girl can do anything a boy can but a boy can't do everything a girl can (a lot of things sure like cooking and cleaning are for both genders but we wouldn't say put a boy in a dress or grow long hair for pigtails). But DH could do trains with a girl or teach her to play chess or watch football with him.

Oh man, I LOVED trains as a kid. My aunt took me to the Museum of Transport in St Louis when I was little. At that time the museum was all about seeing and crawling on trains. I collected quite a bit of HO gauge stuff the next decade. and I'm looking forward to breaking it all out again when Liam gets older. I'll have to buy a new engine and controller, but it will be so worth it.


I confess B missed his court date earlier this week and now has a warrant out for his arrest. and apparently also lost his job, and was kicked out of the place he was living.....

I sure know how to pick em, huh?

Yes . . . and you also know how to GET OUT! :winks:



I got out of the house yesterday - it was heavenly...although there were people who thought I was nuts to be at a toddler's birthday party 4 days post par tum. I personally feel like the days leading up to delivery are more taxing than the days after. But that's just me!

I might too if I had the birth you did! After 14 hours of labor and then being sliced open by my doc the velociraptor (aka c/s), it was many weeks post partum before I felt like going out. We were out to buy a minivan at 3 weeks PP and it exhausted me.

[missychrissy]

Chrissy, I confess I have no idea what you're talking about. It's either that I miss pages of this thread sometimes or that I never watch the news? :dunno:

Do you mean about my McGraw/Goldwin Smith rant? :D Sorry, I feel like I complain about myself all the time & just assumed I'd been lamenting about it here nonstop, but it's possible I didn't say anything...or I only mentioned it once & it was a long time ago.

I've been put in another building here on campus for 2 days a week as a temporary 'trial' period because the IT person has opted to go to school full time to learn to shoe horses. :lol: It's a 3 year program (I think?) and he intends to eventually leave Cornell when he finishes to shoe horses for a living (talk about career change). I just don't want to be stuck here permanently. I want to go back to being in Goldwin Smith full time.


I also confess that I RARELY post anywhere else anymore but in here.

There's nothing wrong with that.

[Cosmosmom]

If I have a soul, my dogs do too. Plain and simple.

I'm so sorry about your chihuahua.
ITA. My girl is more than just an animal....I can see it in her eyes and I know she has emotions (just not quite as complex as mine).

[Cosmosmom]

Stacy, believe me, I am thinking the exact same thing. If he proves me wrong, so be it.
And I'm wondering how I am going to run my daycare immediately after I have my baby. I'm just not sure I can swing it and I don't know what to do. I've considered finding a sub but I'm not sure I'd ever find the right person. And the pay would be crap since I'd still be buying and preparing the meals and I'm hardly making a profit as it is. It might actually be perfect for a stay at home mom looking to make a *little extra money and bring their child along. We shall see.
Could you check and see if any local schools with programs in child care might be looking for someone to do sort of an internship?

[sunrider]

Remember I said I was stress eating like crazy cause of the bankruptcy crap?

I confess I weighed last weekend and I've crossed the 300 mark . . . going up this time. :headbang: Makes me so depressed that I lost almost 60 pounds post partum and have now gained almost 40 of it back.

[missychrissy]

:hugs: Krista

[Cosmosmom]

Oh man, I LOVED trains as a kid. My aunt took me to the Museum of Transport in St Louis when I was little. At that time the museum was all about seeing and crawling on trains. I collected quite a bit of HO gauge stuff the next decade. and I'm looking forward to breaking it all out again when Liam gets older. I'll have to buy a new engine and controller, but it will be so worth it.

.

Yeah we have been to a number of train museums. And we have some HO things...but now he wants O gauge. Found one he liked and ordered it in April 2009...it was an engine, box car and caboose. Got the engine and caboose in December 2009....and we are STILL waiting on the box car though the looks like the latest update was July 2010. Now that we finally have a basement, he is looking to eventually get a cool layout going.
Not so much a kid friendly thing though...at least not this set. He pratically had a heart attack when I touched the engine (it was NOT cheap!!!). The older HO stuff would be more kid friendly. :)

[stash]

I have to share that the carpenter showed up this morning to start finishing out our upstairs bath (we did an office/guest space addition when we moved here, didn't finish the bath, and now are doing it so we have guest space after Gus is born) and I'm ssooooo excited. I want it to be done NOW. :P

Krista, do you have someone to talk to? I mean, other than us :winks:. Therapy isn't over-rated. I'm so sorry you're having this kind of stress, but honestly, the way it impacts your body and soul is up to you and only up to you. The world may have your ass in a ringer from a practical (financial) standpoint but only you have control of your body and mind. In fact, that's the good bit here YOU DO have control over you, whether the rest of the world is conspiring against you, or not.

Bridget, I like the idea of a work study student, though I admit I LOVE the idea of a SAHM. Either way, it just has to be the right person, and I think it needs to be someone with experience.

[Cosmosmom]

Remember I said I was stress eating like crazy cause of the bankruptcy crap?

I confess I weighed last weekend and I've crossed the 300 mark . . . going up this time. :headbang: Makes me so depressed that I lost almost 60 pounds post partum and have now gained almost 40 of it back.
:hugs:
I know the feeling. I lost 167 lbs after the gastric bypass 5.5 years ago. I have regained like 65-70 of that....first stress was when DH lost his job in 2006 and I gained about 15 lbs. Than when we got settled again, we started trying to get pg. After 3 years and not one pg...and since it's pretty much unexplained, I was told to lose weight (which is why I had the gastric bypass was so I could have baby!)....um yeah so I ended up finding a lot more pounds than I ever thought I would. I did so well for almost 2 years after surgery and followed the rules and I swore I would be one of the few who don't regain anything...I was going to allow myself 20-25 lbs to regain in the case of a pg.

DH and I are are getting ready to get back to eating smaller amounts and healthy lower calorie things again and getting in some exercise in again. We ate out a LOT while in the process of moving and unpacking.

[missychrissy]

It helps me to use www.calorie-count.com I'm not good about portion control on my own. It really is true that you don't feel full till 20 minutes after you're done eating too.

But I do know what stress eating is too. It's a much tougher bear to wrestle. :(

[stash]

My helper was a kitchen scale. I weighed every last freakin' thing if it didn't come with a calorie count on the outside of the package (even then sometimes) even if I was overeating and I knew it, and I logged it all on the weight watchers site. Some days I would have to face the fact that I ate double my point allowance. That usually helped kick my ass for the next day...

[sunrider]

Krista, do you have someone to talk to? I mean, other than us :winks:. Therapy isn't over-rated. I'm so sorry you're having this kind of stress, but honestly, the way it impacts your body and soul is up to you and only up to you. The world may have your ass in a ringer from a practical (financial) standpoint but only you have control of your body and mind. In fact, that's the good bit here YOU DO have control over you, whether the rest of the world is conspiring against you, or not.

Not really, and I'm sure that's part of the stress.
Jonathan just keeps telling me not to worry and that we'll be fine. It's not the bankruptcy itself that stresses me, but the fact that we're going to have to live with wage garnishment for close to two years before we can start it. And I take care of the finances so I don't think he realizes what garnishment is going to do to us.

I have friends that have been through a bankruptcy. She filed a year or two before she got married to her second/current husband. And they lost their house to foreclosure less than 2 years ago. But she's rarely available to talk and the times I've tried to talk to her DH (who I DO consider a very good friend), he's done nothing but piss me off.

I feel such horrible shame and embarrassment that this is happening I haven't told hardly anyone. Jonathan told his entire gaming group, which upset me that that many people knew. And I'm not close enough to any of them to talk to them about it now that they know.

I wish I liked exercise and did that when stressed out (instead of eat), but exercise is evil. Except for swimming. And we don't have anywhere to swim that would not cost money to get to get to.

[3andMe]

Lydia - you have me curious as to what the first two thing you thought were?


(1) That your baby was going to be incredibly lucky to have you as a mom, and (2) I wondered how dbf would react.

DH and I finally got an extra set of car seats, and we split up to do separate expeditions this past weekend. I took Ronin to a model train museum with Soren, and we were there for hours! He loved it. Claire was so uninterested when we all went there that we left after a short while because she kept trying to run outside into the parking lot. I do not believe it's a boy/girl thing per se (although Ronin seems to be far more interested in vehicles than Claire)--it's just my kids. My grandmother was a train conductor before she got too frail.

[intactivstmom]

I might too if I had the birth you did! After 14 hours of labor and then being sliced open by my doc the velociraptor (aka c/s), it was many weeks post partum before I felt like going out. We were out to buy a minivan at 3 weeks PP and it exhausted me.

I had about 23 hours of either labor or crappy drugs trying to stop labor. One of them had me shaking so bad my Grandma and Mom thought the hospital was trying to freeze me to death, although I would have preferred to shake for 6 weeks then go through what I did.

I finally had a c/s when they couldn't stop labor and Robbie was transverse.
And then I got to pump 8 times a day, and go to the nicu and back four times a day over a road that was under construction. I thought I was going to tear my stitches.




ITA. My girl is more than just an animal....I can see it in her eyes and I know she has emotions (just not quite as complex as mine).

My little girl is the same. Big, beautiful eyes, and you can see her curiosity, love, and life behind them. There is no way one of my very best friends does not have a soul.


Krista, do you have someone to talk to? I mean, other than us :winks:. Therapy isn't over-rated. I'm so sorry you're having this kind of stress, but honestly, the way it impacts your body and soul is up to you and only up to you. The world may have your ass in a ringer from a practical (financial) standpoint but only you have control of your body and mind. In fact, that's the good bit here YOU DO have control over you, whether the rest of the world is conspiring against you, or not.


This is great advice. Therapy can be so great, especially if you find the right one for your personality. :hugs::hugs:

[intactivstmom]

Dh is quitting his job today. Dh has worked in a small auto repair shop for about 5-6 years. He has been fired and then kept on for as little hours as you can be and still get unemployment, and then hired back full time after a few months when the shop was no longer in danger of going under. It has been a great job.

Only now the boss has let her son take over. His son, S, is real jerk, he knows Nick hates certain jobs and makes sure dh has to do them, treats everyone like crap, and is just mean. Oh, and S leaves for hours at a time and goes in the bathroom to do drugs. Everyone thinks he is doing cocaine, but can't say for sure.

Wednesday will be his last day. He is only giving 3 days notice because they only gave him 3 days notice when they fired him, 3 days is the end of the pay period. And every day he stays after he quits S will make his life hell.

Nick has a lawn mower tune up business, Mower Tune, that is bringing in a little income. The scariest part is that we are putting more money into advertising to try and get more income from Mower Tune dh looks for jobs. I'm worried we are going to spend more in advertising than we will make working on mowers.

[Cosmosmom]

It helps me to use www.calorie-count.com (http://www.calorie-count.com) I'm not good about portion control on my own. It really is true that you don't feel full till 20 minutes after you're done eating too.

But I do know what stress eating is too. It's a much tougher bear to wrestle. :(
I was using sparkpeople.com for a while and just need to get back to that. Was a bit eye opening to see the counts for some things!
I know for me, I'm a slow eater, always was and even more so now. If I eat too fast, even though it's been 5.5 years, I will be in pain for like 20-30 minutes...it's like something get stuck. I do still need to chew well and go slow (it was REALLY bad in first year after surgery...had to chew everything forever).

I do my share of stress eating....but a bigger problem for me is I'm pretty much always hungry (I can tell which one I'm doing). Before surgery, I honestly didn't know what feeling full was. I was never full. I only stopped because I knew that I already had way more than I should have needed.

After surgery, they told me I wouldn't feel hungry for 9-12 months. I got about 2-3 weeks and than bam hunger hit again. The cool part though was at least after I ate something, I finally knew what feeling full was like.
I still can feel full....but most of the time (I would say that probably 95-97% of my waking hours), I'm hungry. and I do eat a good amount of fiber (we both actually really like broccoli LOL), make sure to get in my protein and drink a LOT of water.
I'm finally coming to the conclusion that I'm just going to have to suck it up and be hungry most of the time.

[midgeend]

I might too if I had the birth you did! After 14 hours of labor and then being sliced open by my doc the velociraptor (aka c/s), it was many weeks post partum before I felt like going out. We were out to buy a minivan at 3 weeks PP and it exhausted me.


I had about 23 hours of either labor or crappy drugs trying to stop labor. One of them had me shaking so bad my Grandma and Mom thought the hospital was trying to freeze me to death, although I would have preferred to shake for 6 weeks then go through what I did.

I finally had a c/s when they couldn't stop labor and Robbie was transverse.
And then I got to pump 8 times a day, and go to the nicu and back four times a day over a road that was under construction. I thought I was going to tear my stitches.




I realize that I sound insensitive about how fast I got out of the house...I didn't think about it in terms other than my own experience...so I'm sorry if I sounded like I think everyone should just snap right back :hugs:


Krista - I still owe you some info on battling anxiety naturally, i have not forgotten. Much of what I do is diet related actually, so could hewlp w/ weight also.

[The10Eels]

I confess I am still kinda giggling over
my doc the velociraptor.....


Is that bad?

[midgeend]

how long do you think it's going to take me to remember that the baby will pee if i take off her diaper and to put a prefold under her butt when i'm changing her?

[Bridget]

Thanks, Lydia. :wub:
Krista - I hope you get back on the upswing soon. I hate it when it feels like life just keeps dumping on you.
I just got an awesome deal on some newborn cloth diapers. When I picked them up the lady was like, "Gosh, I think I could have gotten a lot more for these. I had so many responses to my ad"
I was all, "Yup, here you go seeyoulaterbye!" before she could change her mind. :laugh:

I'm really going to try and make my own so I don't have to buy anymore. I need to open my sewing machine. It gives me an ache to look at it because my mom was teaching me so much about the craft and every time I had any little question I just called her and she always knew. We had a lot of fun sitting in front of that machine. It's going to hurt to do it without her.

[missychrissy]

Dh is quitting his job today. Dh has worked in a small auto repair shop for about 5-6 years. He has been fired and then kept on for as little hours as you can be and still get unemployment, and then hired back full time after a few months when the shop was no longer in danger of going under. It has been a great job.

Only now the boss has let her son take over. His son, S, is real jerk, he knows Nick hates certain jobs and makes sure dh has to do them, treats everyone like crap, and is just mean. Oh, and S leaves for hours at a time and goes in the bathroom to do drugs. Everyone thinks he is doing cocaine, but can't say for sure.

Wednesday will be his last day. He is only giving 3 days notice because they only gave him 3 days notice when they fired him, 3 days is the end of the pay period. And every day he stays after he quits S will make his life hell.

Nick has a lawn mower tune up business, Mower Tune, that is bringing in a little income. The scariest part is that we are putting more money into advertising to try and get more income from Mower Tune dh looks for jobs. I'm worried we are going to spend more in advertising than we will make working on mowers.

wow-that's big. Is this a sudden decision, or have you been discussing it for a while? I wish you both luck!